Over-explaining is a form of begging

Added: 2026-05-25

[00:00:00]You are hemorrhaging energy when you're trying to overexplain yourself and articulate yourself in the most perfect way possible to somebody who is committed to misunderstanding you, who is committed to misunderstanding everything that you're saying, who is committed to deflection, committed to changing the subject, committed to Darvo, committed to um avoiding accountability, avoiding taking the L that is they didn't know something or maybe that um they were less educated in some way. You are hemorrhaging your precious energy when you try and overexplain yourself to people who are committed to misunderstanding you. And I would go as far as to say it is low-key a form of like begging. You're begging for them to understand you. You're begging for them to validate you. You're begging for them to like see you. If they can't see you, [ __ ] off. Just literally go somewhere else.

[00:00:51]Literally go to people that do see you, do understand you, do um are curious about you.

[00:00:57]Because some people are committed to misunderstanding you, and you will go blue in the face trying to explain yourself to them, explain your reality, explain your lived experience. They're not interested. It is a waste of your time. You're hemorrhaging your own energy. Go and direct it into people that literally breathe life into you, okay? It's a form of begging, and you you do not need to be doing that.

[00:01:20]It It Just when you find yourself like writing paragraphs or when you find yourself trying to explain basic empathy and honesty and kindness to people, [ __ ] stop. I remember having to do this sometimes with like somebody that I used to date. I remember being sat there and realizing, "Shit, I just explained basic empathy to this man. I just explained basic like um compassion and basic social inequality to this man because he hadn't done any critical thinking. He hadn't looked beyond his own experience or and just only took things at face value." I'm not going to be doing that. It is a form of like submission and begging. I won't be doing it.

[00:01:55]And I don't think you should be doing it, either. If somebody if you're finding yourself having to like explain basic [ __ ] to them, explain basic human emotions and like empathy, it's a it's a lost cause. Just burn them off, they're not worth it. Like it's not worth you trying to educate them, especially when they're not interested in actually learning. They're not interested in hearing your point of view. They're not interested in actually becoming a better person or interested in they don't give a [ __ ] about you. Cuz if they did, they wouldn't have done that initial thing. Genuinely, like just walk off. Like they don't deserve any more of your energy.

[00:02:27]Remove yourself. Jeez.