The REAL Reason Marriages Go Sexless | Official Preview

Added: 2026-05-28

[00:00:00]I think when people think of sex, they think, "Oh, just find a partner."

[00:00:07]Especially Gen Z's cuz I teach Gen Z's in college, right? The most pressing issue for Gen Z guys is just finding a partner, you know, sexual communication.

[00:00:17]So, whenever I teach these things, I was like, "Oh, just get me a girl first."

[00:00:22]Definitely.

[00:00:25]>> Oh, [ __ ] A.

[00:00:29]>> I don't have RZ. Dr. Tara, have you heard of RZ?

[00:00:32]>> No.

[00:00:33]>> Oh. Um, it's Gen Z for charisma.

[00:00:35]>> Oh, okay.

[00:00:36]>> Or like being able to like get a girl.

[00:00:38]>> Yeah. Yeah. No, I don't have RZ. Dr. Tara.

[00:00:43]>> That hit.

[00:00:44]>> Get me a girl first before you even teach me sexual communication. Who do I talk to? So not their most pressing issue. The most pressing issue for them is not finding a partner. But then the misguided belief that a lot of people have is having a partner solves all issues >> when it comes to relationships. When in fact, you know this by now, you know, being in a relationship for so long that communication is the most important thing in a relationship. Whatever issues you have, communication is going to be the tool that solves those issues. men that have a lot of bad pictures on dating apps and they say they don't get any matches is because of your pictures.

[00:01:30]>> At first, you mentioned people that hadn't had sex in over 2 years. Adults, >> a lot of people listening and watching have this experience where, yeah, I just don't want to bother anymore. I have initiated so many times, got rejected so many times, I don't bother anymore. I think that's a lot more common than anyone would think. And people might feel ashamed that that's happening to them and their marriage. But what they don't know is other people do it too. I just don't bother anymore. I'll just do it myself. You know, same result, right?

[00:02:01]But it's not the same.

[00:02:03]>> Not the same.

[00:02:03]>> Not the same.

[00:02:04]>> Because what's missing is human connection. That sexual connection with your partner is the distinguishing difference between a friendship, roommate friendship and a romantic relationship.

[00:02:17]>> All right. I want my partner to climax before I do.

[00:02:20]>> Love that. So, you're a generous lover.

[00:02:22]>> Um, open to trying new stuff.

[00:02:26]>> Love that.

[00:02:27]>> All the time.

[00:02:29]>> What's all the time?

[00:02:31]>> Every day.

[00:02:37]Hi, I'm Dr. Tara. Watch this episode early on Vigilance Elite Patreon. Do you know the difference between chemistry and compatibility?

[00:02:45]>> Am I attracted to this person? Yes. Do I want to have sex with this person? Yes.

[00:02:50]>> What happens to them is not only it affects their relational health, right?

[00:02:57]The relationship is it's dry, right? It affects their emotional health, their mental health, their physical health because they go, "Oh my god, I didn't realize I was really into this." And now it brings so much pleasure to their sex life and connection between the two people. And how bonding is it that now you can have the sex that you actually want. I can teach about sexual satisfaction, sexual communication, mindfulness, uh relational communication, all of these things in college, >> dude.

[00:03:39]>> Nice.

[00:03:40]>> You want me to take it?

[00:03:41]>> Yeah. It's heavy.

[00:03:42]>> All right.

[00:03:42]>> I need to work out more.

[00:03:44]>> All right.

[00:03:58]Wow, that's so badass.

[00:04:00]>> You want to rip a couple?