BLAME DADDY?! Women Raised By Toxic Mothers STRUGGLE In Relationships The MOST!!

Added: 2026-05-12

[00:00:00]I don't love my mother anymore.

[00:00:05]>> My mama listens but she don't hear.

[00:00:07]>> Okay, give me an example, >> please.

[00:00:09]>> I told her like, "Hey, mom, I got violated and stuff like that in January.

[00:00:15]>> I was violated." And she lit a cigarette and was like, "Okay, >> I was molested when I was younger. This is a triggering conversation for me. One thing I will not do is sit here and be ridiculed by my own child who knows I will go to the ends of the earth.

[00:00:31]>> To hear the truth and when the truth come to her, she don't want to hear it.

[00:00:33]>> Your daughter's crying.

[00:00:35]>> She always crying.

[00:00:36]>> How How are your daughters evil?

[00:00:38]>> I just want you to tell me because you keep saying they're evil. How are they evil?

[00:00:42]>> Can you explain that to me?

[00:00:43]>> Cuz they all got something against me.

[00:00:44]They say something bad against me.

[00:00:46]>> My mother was calling the pageant director and was telling her I was an alcoholic. I was dating this older man.

[00:00:53]I was all of these horrible things and that I should not be her beauty queen. I I was a horrible representation and she tried to get my crown taken.

[00:01:03]>> LIKE YOU BEAUTIFUL LIKE YOU BEAUTIFUL YOUR VOICE WHILE YOU TALKING TO ME.

[00:01:09]>> OKAY. CUZ YOU SAID THAT DON'T EVEN MAKE SENSE COMING OUT YOUR >> INSECURE. YOU SAID I WAS INSECURE WHEN I WAS 14 YEARS OLD BECAUSE YOU KEPT TELLING ME I WAS FAT >> CUZ I KEPT TELLING YOU YOU WAS FAT.

[00:01:20]>> YES. SO YOU GOING TO LIE?

[00:01:22]YOU ARE THE ONLY PARENT IN THE HOUSE.

[00:01:25]>> I'm so bound. I'M NOT THE ONLY PARENT IN THE HOUSE. THAT'S WHY I GOT TO DO THIS.

[00:01:28]I GOT MURDERED >> AND YOU'RE NOT GOING TO TELL ME AT THAT POINT.

[00:01:34]>> WHY? WHY ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF, BRO?

[00:01:37]>> We have entire movements teaching women to heal from toxic men. But almost no one is talking about toxic mothers. I mean, I have sometimes on this channel, but nothing like what I'm about to do in this video. And for a lot of daughters, their first heartbreak was not a boy. It was actually our mothers. The very woman who was supposed to build our identity became the person who shattered it. And we're going to talk about it as we review some of these clips on how this impacts. And I remember one time seeing a video a few years ago when Kevin Samuels was still alive doing content and he spoke on this when this touched a lot of women. I know women who are accomplished, PhD, Ivy League, NBA, well-healed, and I cannot tell you how many times I have told women that something that they need to do or confront with their mother and they become little girls right before my eyes. The transformation is instantaneous and it's terrifying all at the same time. I'm talking about women who have argued cases before the Supreme Court and you need to say and oh no I could never.

[00:02:49]That is a power reserved for God.

[00:02:54]You we gentlemen I don't think we understand how many girls live in fear of their mother because they didn't get loved growing up.

[00:03:06]They got to get fathers who made them little girls and princesses and feel safe. Their mothers taught them how to survive. Imagine this. These mothers are Spartans and these young women are hop.

[00:03:22]This is Sparta.

[00:03:25]You while other girls are in the kitchen or doing arts and crafts and Girl Scouts and sleepovers and things like that.

[00:03:34]girls are either a disruption to their peace or their time, so they're shued away, but they better help with the housework and this and that, man. Man, >> now before we get deep into this, y'all go ahead and hit the like button for me.

[00:03:53]Share this video if it sparks interest or conversations with your loved ones.

[00:03:57]But also, y'all, I want y'all to know that this conversation is not intended to attack all mothers. This is just talking about a specific group and maybe somebody can relate to this. I know oftent times we always hear about the mother wounds from the sun, but we never really talk loudly about the mother wombs that women have a lot that impact our way of how we connect with friends, how we connect with men. And a lot of the times men don't really realize the issues we have internally really come from our mothers. But we're going to get into it. Oh, I'm about to die.

[00:04:30]>> Some daughters didn't grow up with mothers. They grew up with a lifelong emotional competition. And society hates this conversation because typically the second you criticize mothers, people panic. I mean, we see it all the time.

[00:04:43]We can talk about toxic fathers all day long. Dead beat fathers, narcissistic men, abusive husbands. But the moment somebody says, "My mother emotionally abused me." Suddenly, everybody becomes uncomfortable. They have to police what you meant. Oh, your mother went through this. And it becomes about highlighting your mother and not exactly what you're feeling.

[00:05:02]>> Andre had all these complaints about me and John looked at him and said, "Damn, mommy was only 17. Give her a break. She did the best she could."

[00:05:10]>> Because motherhood has been romanticized so deeply that many daughters are suffering in silence while protecting the very women who broke them. I mean, I know women personally who have went through severe verbal abuse and somewhat physical abuse from their mother, but all their rhetoric now is geared towards how men ruined their whole lives and they never knew their father. It made me wonder like maybe the person that you have been viewing has ruined your thought process.

[00:05:39]>> Goodbye.

[00:05:40]>> Angela Renee White, I birthed her. [ __ ] Sometimes I wish I never put that [ __ ] on a block for that [ __ ] >> BIPOLAR >> WEDNESDAY.

[00:05:52]>> MENTAL ISSUES.

[00:05:53]>> 5 DAYS.

[00:05:53]>> YOU PUT YOUR HAND IN MY FACE AGAIN, GIRL.

[00:05:56]>> YOU'RE GOING TO STRETCH YOUR ASS ACROSS THIS mother >> kitchen.

[00:06:00]>> You better KEEP YOUR MOTHER HANDS OUT MY FACE.

[00:06:02]>> FIVE DAYS.

[00:06:03]>> Don't touch me no more.

[00:06:04]>> Five.

[00:06:05]>> You do it again, I'mma rock your world in this [ __ ] >> So rock it.

[00:06:08]>> You put your hands on me again.

[00:06:10]>> So rock it.

[00:06:11]>> Put your hands on me again. Rock it.

[00:06:15]If you can turn a little bit.

[00:06:18]>> No, she didn't turn to me.

[00:06:19]>> I am facing you.

[00:06:20]>> That's now.

[00:06:22]>> I been faced you >> anyway. Go ahead.

[00:06:24]>> I been faced her, right? And I moved the chair that was in between us.

[00:06:29]>> Okay. Go. Correct.

[00:06:30]>> What is it?

[00:06:31]>> So, my mother used to tell me she wish she had an abortion. Your mother said that you were an oops, baby.

[00:06:37]>> I mean, uh, that's Tony. It's fine. It happened. I'm moving past it. You know, I love my mom to death. um you know sometimes like stuff happens just like how like stuff happens with you know every other family and it doesn't make me any different just that my stuff is like more front street you know I'm just hoping that you know um in the future that we could just keep a little bit keep certain things like that private and whatnot and we're kind of like working towards that >> if you were raised by a mother who was a narcissist it's a high probability that your mother didn't raise you. She competed with you. Because a lot of times narcissistic mothers, they don't raise their daughters, they compete with their daughters. Not every mother celebrates their daughter. Not every mother is proud of their daughter. There are actually some mothers out there who are threatened by their daughter's confidence, by their daughter's intelligence. They're threatened by their daughter's sense of self. And when you're growing up with this type of mother, you don't realize it at first.

[00:07:38]You're unaware that this is narcissism.

[00:07:41]You're unaware that it's jealousy, that it's envy. You're not aware of it. And you know, as a child, you're conditioned or you're just hardwired to love your mom because this is the person that gave you life. So, growing up, you you know, you feel love for them. You love them.

[00:07:58]You care for them. You want to be like them. You want them to be proud of you.

[00:08:02]You want to please them. You want to make them happy. But when you're growing up with a mother that is jealous of you, you grow up always feeling like you have to prove yourself. You grow up feeling like something's wrong with you. You grow up feeling like anything that you do isn't good enough. It's never enough.

[00:08:21]You grow up with a lot of criticism and judgment. Anything that you say and do is going to be met with criticism, judgment, put down. growing up. You're gas lit into thinking that the treatment that you're receiving is discipline.

[00:08:37]You're gas lit into thinking that it's correction, that she is just trying to instill certain characteristics in you, you know, like teaching you how to be humble or how to not take up too much space. You think it's actual teaching.

[00:08:52]You think it's discipline. You think it's correction. You think it's guidance. And when you get older and you come to the realization that your mother was competing with you, so much of your life, your upbringing, your relationship with your mother just makes sense. It just starts to make sense. It's like the dots start connecting.

[00:09:14]I don't love my mother anymore. I stopped loving her a long time ago.

[00:09:22]I've tried repeatedly to love her even though she's done some of the most horrific evil things to me.

[00:09:30]Even though she's still married to the man who sexually molested me. Even though, you know, she's done some horrible things. And I mean, this is not a one-time incident. This is years and years and years of constant bullying and just toxicity from my mother. And she specifically targeted me. There was always something about me. But as sweet and as kind as I was, and my family knows, you know, me as a child growing up, I was very softspoken. I was very shy, um, non-aggressive, not the fight. The girl that you see right now, this, I was totally the opposite. I know my family looks at me in shock, you know, when I curse and I flip and I go off. That's cuz I'm tired. You know, when you push somebody to their [ __ ] limit, they're gonna snap and go the [ __ ] off. My entire life, damn near, I've been the shy, fat, quiet girl in the corner.

[00:10:27]Never talk back, always took a beating, always took, you know, somebody disrespect. I took a lot of disrespect off a lot of people.

[00:10:35]But my number one bully, my number one hater was my mother and always has been.

[00:10:42]What I've come to realize is that, you know, I cut her off over 15 years ago.

[00:10:48]And in that 15 years span, it's given me a lot of time to really study her, study her behaviors, study her upbringing, study her childhood, um, and also monitor her behavior as a result of me pulling away from her. Did me pulling away from her and staying away from her change her behavior or did it stay the same?

[00:11:13]And what I've come to realize is that her behavior NEVER CHANGED. ALL THE [ __ ] SACRIFICES I MADE FOR YOU. DON'T YOU EVER TELL ME I'M SELFISH. Don't you do it. And you know what? You going to pay for that. ME SELFISH.

[00:11:28]>> OKAY.

[00:11:29]>> ON MY GRADUATION.

[00:11:30]>> ME SELFISH?

[00:11:31]>> ON MY GRADUATION?

[00:11:32]>> YES. YOU GOING TO TELL ME ALL THE [ __ ] I DONE DID FOR YOU, JAMIRA. THAT I'M SELFISH.

[00:11:38]>> WHAT YOU DID WAS SELFISH.

[00:11:41]>> Get the [ __ ] back down. I'm tired of helping YOU DO [ __ ] I'M ALWAYS HELPING YOU. WHEN DO I STOP? WHEN DO I STOP HELPING YOU? WHEN DO YOU DO IT YOURSELF?

[00:11:51]LEARN TO DO it yourself.

[00:11:55]I've been helping you.

[00:11:57]The type of idiot this woman is to be talking to a toddler as if she can understand, as if she doesn't need the love and the care and the nurturing that a lot of these women do not have. They will be harassing their baby daddy talking about, "I'm taking care of this kid. You ain't helping me." When really, this is how they treating a kid with no love. They hate the kid. And the way she's talking to her, knowing she has a physical limitation, makes me question, does she have this limitation because of you? This is like so hard to watch. And I wonder who the father is that left his child with this woman. Any man who has a baby bot woman and you know how she talks to you and you're leaving her there to talk and and beat up on your child and verbally abuse your child or even sometimes physical. This is your fault just as much as it's hers. I'm sorry.

[00:12:43]>> EVERYONE'S BEEN HELPING YOU. NOW IT'S ON YOU, GIRL. WE CANNOT KEEP HELPING YOU.

[00:12:50]>> [ __ ] MAN.

[00:12:51]>> GET UP ON YOUR OWN, GIRL.

[00:12:58]NO, YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG. THAT'S A [ __ ] PROBLEM. PAY ATTENTION.

[00:13:04]>> One foot. Boom.

[00:13:07]Do it.

[00:13:09]Keep your FOOT [ __ ] FLAT. FLAT. FLAT.

[00:13:12]YEAH.

[00:13:14]Now push off your hands. Yeah. And put your feet Yes. DA. WHY [ __ ] SO HARD FOR YOU, BRO? I DON'T KNOW. YOU'RE NOT PAYING ATTENTION. You need to [ __ ] pay attention. Pay attention. I DON'T GIVE A [ __ ] >> NOW, I want y'all to pay attention to how this big hog of a mother is trying to bully her daughter and point at her daughter by calling her daughter a name based on how her daughter is choosing to eat when she's looking at your big hungry ass eat the same way. And the father on the other side who's weak, who's going to allow his woman to bully this child. his child, I believe. I don't know. But you're going to allow her to bully this child in your presence, and you just say nothing. This is the [ __ ] I'll be talking about. Just take a look.

[00:13:59]>> How y'all doing on this Friday?

[00:14:01]>> Broke half.

[00:14:03]>> My phone was my fault.

[00:14:07]Is this Friday?

[00:14:08]>> Next time breaking in half cuz you look like a pig, >> [ __ ] She look like you.

[00:14:15]Spit it out. Spit it out.

[00:14:17]Look how she going to break it up.

[00:14:25]That's not funny, man. Like, let me just pack her whole mouth with the one new ball.

[00:14:40]Really, you have to cut down.

[00:14:45]Have to cut that.

[00:14:47]Technically, yes. No.

[00:14:52]>> The thing about a narcissistic mother can destroy a daughter without ever laying a hand on her. I mean, we've seen it. It's no bruises, no police reports.

[00:15:00]Even though in some of these clips, they are calling the police on their kid. But no black eyes sometimes, just years of emotional warfare, diagnosis motherhood, and a little bit of people telling you, "Hey, she did the best she could. She's still a good mom. She was there. She's better than the the man that was not there that left you. She stayed. She stayed and did what to you. What is the outcome of her demonstration in your life? Did it make you a better woman or did it make you more of a jaded, bitter woman who has selfidentity issues? Let's talk about it.

[00:15:31]>> Finally on this show, it's like I really get to realize how she acts and it's like she not even giving me a scenario, a why.

[00:15:42]What do you want your mother to understand?

[00:15:44]>> Um, I want her to understand that like I I will be there to help. I will help every time you ask. But it's like you can't just go off yelling.

[00:15:55]>> Do you regret having a daughter?

[00:15:56]>> You I >> If she was a boy, she'd probably be better.

[00:16:06]>> She's insecure. She's out.

[00:16:09]Literally, you are insecure. So don't sit up here and act like you're not because you are.

[00:16:14]>> You are insecure.

[00:16:15]>> No, I'm not.

[00:16:15]>> You are insecure. YOU WILL PUT YOU YOU GOT THIS ON and you don't know and you DON'T THINK YOU BEAUTIFUL. WHY YOU DON'T FEEL LIKE YOU BEAUTIFUL?

[00:16:22]>> YOU DON'T FEEL LIKE YOU BEAUTIFUL YOUR VOICE. WHY YOU TALKING TO ME?

[00:16:26]>> OKAY. CUZ YOU SAID THAT DON'T EVEN MAKE SENSE COMING OUT YOUR MOUTH. INSECURE.

[00:16:30]>> YOU SAID I WAS INSECURE WHEN I WAS 14 YEARS OLD BECAUSE YOU KEPT TELLING ME I WAS FAT.

[00:16:36]>> CUZ I kept telling you you was fat.

[00:16:38]>> Can't you see the pattern here? Once you're confronted with something you do, now it's in d and d and d and d and d and d and d and d and d and d and denow.

[00:16:43]Now I don't remember. Now it's you need to respect me. And then they're going to reverse and you be the victim. And now they're going to be offensive again because they don't like that you just told the truth about them and they have to address it. It's a mental [ __ ] issue I'm trying to TELL YOU.

[00:16:58]>> YES. SO YOU GOING TO LIE?

[00:17:00]>> YOU CALLING ME BIG?

[00:17:01]>> OH, MOM.

[00:17:03]>> I'M SORRY your ass WAS FAT THEN.

[00:17:04]>> NO. WHEN I LOOK AT THE WHEN I LOOK BACK WHEN I LOOK BACK AT the pictures WHEN I WAS IN FOURTH GRADE WHEN I WAS 14 I WASN'T EVEN BIG.

[00:17:14]>> Change the subject next.

[00:17:16]>> WELL, I GOT Y'ALL DON'T MAKE SENSE.

[00:17:19]>> We don't.

[00:17:20]>> No, especially you mother.

[00:17:22]>> Well, >> so what's the problem?

[00:17:24]>> My mama listens but she don't hear.

[00:17:26]>> Okay, give me an example, >> please.

[00:17:28]>> I told her like, "Hey, mom, I got violated and stuff like that in January.

[00:17:34]I was violated and she lit a cigarette and was like, "Okay." And she started like she had tears in her eyes and stuff like that and I was like, "That's it."

[00:17:43]And then she didn't say nothing and I got up and I walked off.

[00:17:46]>> What was going through your mind?

[00:17:48]>> I was molested when I was younger. This is a triggering conversation for me. One thing I will not do is sit here and be ridiculed by my own child who knows I will go to the ends of the earth for you. You know it. Mama, no. Listen, you said you didn't send your peace. Now, listen to me. And the reasons why I didn't say nothing BECAUSE YOU KNOW THIS ALREADY. IF YOU FELT LIKE YOU NEEDED MORE HELP, I'm not the one to help you with it. Cuz I ain't got I ain't DONE WITH MY OWN HEALING. And you know this.

[00:18:14]THIS IS NOT SOMETHING I HEAR FROM YOU.

[00:18:16]SO, IF YOU NEEDED THAT HEALING, what you should HAVE DID WAS GOT YOURSELF SOME DOG ON PROFESSIONAL HELP OR REACHED OUT TO ME AND SAID, "I NEED PROFESSIONAL HELP." SO, HOW THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO HELP YOU IF I CAN'T HELP MYSELF?

[00:18:26]>> YOU CHOOSE. HOW YOU act matters.

[00:18:29]>> You don't matter to me. NO MORE CHILD WHEN YOU TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF, BRO.

[00:18:34]>> AND YOU DON'T GIVE a >> It's not my fault.

[00:18:36]>> I DON'T CARE.

[00:18:37]>> YOU'RE NOT GOING TO FAULT me for that.

[00:18:38]That's like the magic bullet. I'm not biting your mag.

[00:18:41]>> YOU ARE THE ONLY PARENT IN THE HOUSE.

[00:18:43]>> I'M BOUND. I'm not THE ONLY PARENT IN THE HOUSE. THAT'S WHY I GOT TO DO THIS.

[00:18:47]I GOT MY BROTHER AND YOU'RE NOT GOING TO TELL ME AT THAT POINT.

[00:18:52]>> WHY? WHY ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF, BRO?

[00:18:54]>> BECAUSE YOU THINK YOU'RE BEING SELFISH RIGHT NOW?

[00:18:56]>> BECAUSE YOU'RE SCREAMING at me. You shouldn't You shouldn't respect me.

[00:19:03]That'll take a moment.

[00:19:04]>> See, the thing about it is a daughter learns herself through reflection. So, imagine spending your childhood looking into the eyes of someone who constantly tells you things like, "You're dramatic.

[00:19:15]You're too sensitive. Nobody likes you.

[00:19:17]You think you're prettier than everybody. You're this. You're that.

[00:19:20]You're fat.

[00:19:22]>> IN THIS HOUSE AGAIN, BRO, AND DO NOT COME LOOKING FOR ME. I PROMISE YOU I WILL NOT BE NOWHERE TO BE FOUND BECAUSE OF YOU. AND I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT. I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT I WILL NEVER COME BACK HERE BECAUSE OF YOU.

[00:19:34]>> THAT'S IT.

[00:19:35]>> Because I asked you TO DO SOMETHING.

[00:19:37]>> NO, THAT'S NOT BECAUSE I ASKED YOU TO DO SOMETHING.

[00:19:39]>> THAT'S NOT WHY YOU USED TO BE. THAT'S EVERY DAY. BECAUSE >> BUT WHEN'S THE LAST TIME YOU GOT A WHOOPING?

[00:19:45]>> THAT DON'T MEAN NOTHING. JUST THINKING ABOUT IT.

[00:19:47]>> IT DOES. IT DOES. IT DOES. AND IT REALLY DOES BECAUSE AT THIS POINT YOU'RE NOT GETTING ANY WHOOPING WHOOPING BACK. NO.

[00:19:53]RIGHT. SO WE DON'T GET NO WHOOPING. YOU MENTALLY ABUSE THAT. THAT'S WHAT YOU DO.

[00:19:57]YOU GOOD AT THAT. YOU KNOW THAT. STOP.

[00:19:59]YOU KNOW THAT. YOU GOOD AT MENTALLY ABUSING PEOPLE. AND YOU KNOW THAT.

[00:20:02]>> HOW DO I MENTALLY ABUSE YOU, ALEXIS?

[00:20:04]PLEASE EXPLAIN IT.

[00:20:05]>> BECAUSE ALL YOU DO IS SIT THERE AND TALK ALL DAY LIKE YOU YOU WANT SOMETHING TO SAY. THAT'S WHY YOU BE WANTING JUST DOING SOMETHING TO SAY. YOU CUSS FOR NO REASON. YOU COME DOWN HERE and yell for no reason. It be absolutely no reason at all. You could be telling US PICK UP PAPER. I MEAN, YOU TOLD ME TO PICK UP A PAPER. WHY IS MY HOUSE NOT CLEAN? IT'S NOT THAT SCARY. IT'S NOT THAT SCARY.

[00:20:23]IT'S NOT THAT SCARY. THAT'S SERIOUS. IF I HAD TO KEEP SAYING, if I had to keep telling you the same THING OVER AND OVER AGAIN, I have every right.

[00:20:32]>> Feel like you don't know how to take accountability. Uh you like to deflect from a lot of situations and if I could be honest with myself, uh you've always been promiscuous as well and it's really affected our relationship.

[00:20:44]>> You know, >> yes, >> I do take accountability.

[00:20:46]>> You don't? Yeah, I do. I've been taking accountability and like I told like I've been telling y'all. I said I do take accountability for any and everything.

[00:20:54]If you come to me and have a conversation with me, I'll talk to you.

[00:20:57]But you Iceland per you do not come to me and talk to me. You rather talk to everybody else but me. Can I tell you why? I I was depressed. I was angry. I was mad. But what I did was I started getting counseling. Um I went to my prayer room and I gave it to God. And I was taught to build boundaries around me. So if I allow you to come into my life and I know how you are, you trigger me. You will make me go crazy all over again. So I've learned to love you from a distance.

[00:21:23]>> A mother that does not even believe their own daughter right here. That's a serious problem to me. And it's a problem in the black community cuz I'm voicing to you that your husband was inappropriate with me. And why do you not believe that?

[00:21:39]>> Lying. Quit lying.

[00:21:40]>> I'm lying. Why am I going to LIE TO YOU ABOUT THAT?

[00:21:43]>> YOU STAY LYING. COMING FROM MY CHILD.

[00:21:46]>> THIS HAS HAPPENED FOR YEARS, Y'ALL.

[00:21:48]>> I COME IN THIS >> Y'ALL SEE THIS?

[00:21:52]>> COMING FROM MY CHILD IS ALWAYS >> YOU REALLY TAKING UP KNOWN HIM FOR A LONG TIME AND IT DON'T EVEN MATTER.

[00:21:58]>> MAN, I get out of class. When I get out of everything, I feel so uncomfortable in this house and she want to sit up here and take up for this man. LIKE, YOU'RE DISGUSTING. BOTH OF Y'ALL ARE HAPPY TO GET PREGNANT.

[00:22:16]Y'ALL KNOW HOW HARD THIS IS FOR ME TO EVEN BELIEVE THIS BECAUSE THIS MAN I HAVE TO COME IN MY HOME WITH MY MAMA THAT'S SUPPOSED TO LOVE ME AND YOU WANT TO SIT HERE FOR HIM.

[00:22:29]>> WHY WOULD I LIE Y'ALL? WHY WOULD I LIE?

[00:22:32]>> WHY? YOU SAY LIKE I'M I'M SHAKING RIGHT NOW Y'ALL CUZ THIS MAKES NO SENSE. IT MAKES NO SENSE AT ALL. and she WANT TO SIT HERE AND JUSTIFY IT. YOU ARE SAD.

[00:22:44]YOU A SAD AND DISGUSTING HUMAN BEING. I SWEAR TO GOD, I LOOK AT YOU. According to the CDC adverse childhood experiences studies, which is aces, emotional abuse is the most commonly reported childhood trauma in America. I didn't know that.

[00:22:59]But see, narcissistic mothers don't always scream. Sometimes they compete.

[00:23:03]Sometimes they guilt trip you. Sometimes they humiliate. or even they make their daughters feel ugly because they secretly resent her youth. And some daughters spend their entire adult lives trying to earn love they should have given already. Which translates into how women date. They date certain men that are emotionally absent, emotionally neglective because they never got emotional love. They never had any parent there that was emotionally available for them which should have been their mother. So what happens is they start to go after men who are emotionally unavailable or sometime they become lesbian and they go after women who are emotionally unavailable. However it is the partner that they choose is going to be a partner that they feel like they need to work to earn their love which is a lot a lot of the times you'll hear us as women say I did everything for this man and he steal. I did everything and he steal. Yeah, you did everything to try to prove that you were worthy of love instead of letting a person just come in and love you because your warped view from your mother makes you think that love is something you have to earn, not nothing that you just given. That's why the quote unquote good guy or nice guy. If he just comes in showing love, it's weird. What does he want? He must need something from me.

[00:24:12]It's a insecure but also a identity issue where you yourself do not feel like you're worthy to be loved. Your mama taught you wrong. You heard what the [ __ ] I said. She taught you wrong and she deliberately did it on purpose because she hates her [ __ ] life even though she got a man. Maybe she got a boyfriend. Maybe she's still with your raggedy daddy knowing he cheats on her.

[00:24:37]Maybe she's got, you know, married to another man, you know, a stepfather and he ain't [ __ ] But her entire life she's always had a man, right?

[00:24:49]She taught you wrong. There are two types of mothers that will teach you manipulation.

[00:24:57]The first type of mother is the mother that will teach you how to manipulate a man for his money. Manipulate a man to get pregnant, manipulate a man to get married. If she's teaching you manipulation of any of those three things that I just listed, your mother is a narcissist because she's teaching you how to control a man via his money, via a baby, via marriage.

[00:25:23]And she's not teaching you to run the criminal background or the mental background. She's saying, "Overlook all of that.

[00:25:33]If he makes good money, never mind what his mental health is." get his money. If he's light-skinned with good hair or if he's a white man, don't worry about his mental health if he's crazy or batshit, you know, violent or whatever. Ignore all of that. I need light-skinned grandb babies. I want to be able to brag that I have beautiful light-skinned grandchildren because I'm a colorist and I hate the color of my skin. I'm talking to my black sisters. How many of your mothers have racism issues? They don't like dark skin. If your mother is pressuring you to marry that man, again, it's about control because she's probably married and locked down to a piece of [ __ ] [ __ ] that she don't like, but she's holding on to him for appearances and to maintain her married title. I guarantee you, especially if she's cheated on a [ __ ] she don't like that [ __ ] She just likes the benefit of being married, being able to say, "I'm a I'm a wife. I have a husband. I'm better than you. You're single. You can't keep a man, but look at me. I was able to keep a husband." Why are you mad at her for standing standing up?

[00:26:32]>> Cuz she going to talk about me.

[00:26:34]>> Cuz she don't like to hear the truth.

[00:26:35]And when the truth come to her, she don't want to hear it.

[00:26:37]>> Your daughter's crying.

[00:26:39]>> She always crying.

[00:26:40]>> How How are your daughters evil?

[00:26:43]>> I just want you to tell me because you keep saying they're evil. How are they evil? They >> can you explain that to me?

[00:26:47]>> Cuz they always got something against me to say something bad against me.

[00:26:51]>> I really want to work this like make it work. I didn't want to come here. I didn't want the audience to be like, "Oh, she a bad person." No, you making yourself look bad. You selling I am what I am and be what I am.

[00:27:05]You told somebody.

[00:27:05]>> My mother was calling the pageant director and was telling her I was an alcoholic. I was dating this older man.

[00:27:13]I was all of these horrible things and that I should not be her beauty queen. I I was a horrible representation and she tried to get my crown taken away. We stop trusting ourselves as women if we go through this. That's why daughters of narcissistic mothers often become chronic people pleasers, perfectionists, emotionally anxious, hyperindependent, terrified of rejection. I mean, you know the rest.

[00:27:37]>> WHAT THE [ __ ] I'MMA HIT YOU FOR, SOMAYA?

[00:27:39]I DON'T GOT NO PEOPLE TO YOUR BUSINESS WITH ME.

[00:27:42]>> AND THAT DOESN'T come from daddy issues that come from mother wounds that have not been addressed. If you guys like the video, go ahead and hit that thumbs up.

[00:27:49]Comment after if you have any suggestions or comments about this subject. And you guys, just remember, we have the tough conversations over here, the quiet part out loud, where we use facts and common sense on this channel.

[00:28:01]So, if you want something a little softer, I'm so sorry. You're going to have to subscribe to another channel.

[00:28:05]Anyway, y'all, bye.