“The Single Independent Lifestyle They FOUGHT For” I'M Tired Of Doing This Alone -Kozmicverse

Added: 2026-06-02

[00:00:00]Days like this, I really wish I was not single.

[00:00:02]>> Girl, why didn't you just give that man a chance?

[00:00:06]>> Once again, I have no one to pick me up from the airport because I'm an independent queen and I take myself home.

[00:00:11]>> Women just do not care about men's opinions. Like, >> being an independent woman is not for me. I just spent 3 days trying to get home from Cape Town by myself.

[00:00:20]>> A lot of times, you will see how women love boasting about how independent they are. That is until they start realizing that they can't do everything alone by themselves and it gets overwhelming.

[00:00:34]That's when they start seeking a man.

[00:00:36]>> Alpha masculinity is so hot. Am I allowed to say that? Like, can we make masculinity cool again?

[00:00:43]>> I don't want to be independent anymore, you guys. I'm so tired of being an independent woman. I don't want to be that.

[00:00:49]>> Okay, can we please talk about dating in your 30s? Because honestly, the material.

[00:00:56]>> I need a man. I need a man because I'm tired doing a man's job. I don't want to be an independent woman anymore.

[00:01:06]>> If we go on a first date, don't take me to some lowass place like Applebees. Are you kidding me?

[00:01:13]>> Making these good men not want to be good men.

[00:01:18]I don't need no man. I can do it all by myself. Can you? Can you? As a man, when you start hearing women saying, "I need a man. I can't do this anymore," that's when you should really be cautious because that is a cry for help. That isn't a woman looking for a relationship. She's looking for a rescue mission. You aren't being invited into a partnership where two people build a life together. You are being recruited as a primary solution to a crisis she hasn't managed on her own. When the language shifts from wanting companionship to needing a savior, the dynamic is already skewed toward dependency before the first date even happens. If you step into that role, you aren't becoming a boyfriend or a husband. You're becoming a project manager for her life. And when you really think about it, it's not just about work itself. It's about doing everything alone, carrying your own weight, solving your own problems, having no real support system, and still being expected to be strong through all of it.

[00:02:27]>> I know I'm not the only one. You can't tell me that I am. You can't. I don't believe it. Where are the men who just Where are Where are the days? The days gone by. The days gone by. The days gone by where your man would just hold you.

[00:02:46]I want to be held. I know I'm not the only one. I can't be. I know. No know I'm not the only one. At this point, I'm considering being open to the idea of being held at gunpoint. That's how dry it is out here.

[00:03:01]Okay. That Vogue article where it's like, "Oh, it's embarrassing to have a boyfriend in 2025." You know what's actually embarrassing? being a guy in 2025. So, I think men respectfully should do this. Get some scissors, cut off your dick, tape a vibrator there, and now you've just made yourself useful. Now, at least you know it knows where the [ __ ] is.

[00:03:24]>> You need help.

[00:03:24]>> Thing that I really wish more women realize is that you are the prize. Like, you're the hot one. You're the one that grabs the attention.

[00:03:32]>> That's real funny.

[00:03:33]>> You're the cool one. You're the one that's emotionally intelligent.

[00:03:37]>> You sure about that?

[00:03:39]>> You are the prize. You're the one that's supposed to be chased after, not chasing a Can you imagine chasing a man? And this is not to go on a rant about like hating men and whatnot. It's really not.

[00:03:53]It's weird behavior to be chasing a man when you're the prize. Like I I don't see it. I don't understand it. They're going to be lost without you. They need you to be cool. They need your presence, your aura to shine.

[00:04:14]>> It's like these women are reciting the same script. They're all believe that they're the prize. All believe that a man should chase after them. And the only reason they have is simply because they're a woman and believe that they're the prize. That's it. It's like dating has turned into a one-way street where the main character energy is dialed up to a point that kills any real connection instead of two people actually trying to vibe and see if they click. It feels more like an interview where you're expected to do all the heavy lifting just to get a maybe. The problem is that when someone decides they're the prize before they've even said hello, they stop putting in any actual effort. It's a total buzzkill for the chemistry because relationships are supposed to be a team sport, not a scavenger hunt where one person hides and the other has to do all the work to find them.

[00:05:15]>> Who's going to pay my bills and buy me the car and buy me the purses and stuff?

[00:05:19]Why? because that affirms her idea that she is hot. Being with an average man affirms the reality that she is not.

[00:05:27]Okay? Simple as that. You are never going to find an average woman that wants to settle for an average man until she absolutely has to. That's why you see people getting married at like 32, 34, around that range, because that's when they start realizing, all right, there's there's no [ __ ] Chads left.

[00:05:45]They're gone. They're married.

[00:05:46]>> Women who talk about I'm an independent woman. I pay all my bills.

[00:05:52]What are you talking? You're a grown ass [ __ ] adult. All adults pay [ __ ] bills. It doesn't matter if you're a woman or a man. You're a grown ass [ __ ] adult. Of course you have to pay [ __ ] bills. I hate when they like make this their wholeing life. I pay my own bills. Of course you do. Who the else is going to pay it? My sister-in-law was like, "Just find something that you want to do." I'm like, "I don't want to do anything. I literally want to be at home on my farm taking care of my house, cleaning my house, taking care of my dogs.

[00:06:24]How am I supposed to tell someone that that's what I want to do?

[00:06:29]I don't want to work. I don't want to do any kind of job. I literally don't.

[00:06:33]Like, how am I supposed to tell someone?

[00:06:38]That's what makes me happy, not working and being at home.

[00:06:44]And I literally have to work.

[00:06:48]Oh my gosh, dude.

[00:06:53]>> What the [ __ ] >> The reality is many women feel like this. They hate the idea of working. I mean, this woman is literally crying because she hates working. She's doing it all by herself and all she wants to do is to be at home. A lot of women fought for the right of women to work, but many of them hate it. And that's where things start to feel confusing because what was once seen as freedom is now for some starting to feel like a burden. The promise was independence, control, and a better life. But the reality for many looks like stress, burnout, and constant pressure with very little emotional reward. Waking up every day to do something that drains you.

[00:07:43]Dealing with people and environments that don't bring you peace, and then being expected to keep pushing like nothing is wrong. It builds up over time. This is the world of man they wanted a part of. Seems like they can't hang.

[00:07:58]>> I think at this point it sounds real good to just give myself a soft life, move back in with my parents, be broke, [ __ ] it.

[00:08:09]I just I've just worked my youth away.

[00:08:12]I'm 30 now. I've proven myself. I've proven my work ethic. I think I just want to go home for a bit.

[00:08:21]I come home and I eat bananas.

[00:08:24]I eat bananas. I'm too tired to cook.

[00:08:27]This just can't be it. I can't I can't.

[00:08:30]This working to just work is ridiculous and I can't do it anymore. It's not a life. It's depressing. Like I'd rather be like, "Yeah, I live at home and I'm happy. So what? I don't own property.

[00:08:42]I'm happy and I live a soft life. My nails are done."

[00:08:45]>> Say what all of us ladies are thinking.

[00:08:47]>> Please don't. That just usually ends up being embarrassing.

[00:08:50]>> Men, you need to step the [ __ ] up. We are living in an era where we don't need you anymore. Women are tired of your [ __ ] You're not showing up and you're not providing. We're going to go do it on our own. Does that mean that more women are going to start acting like functioning adults that can actually provide for themselves instead of relying on a man to do it for them? Oh, how awful.

[00:09:08]>> If you've come into our life and you're not adding any value in any way, especially in the traditional sense, because you are supposed to be the providers and take care of women, we're going to kick your ass to the curb.

[00:09:15]>> I honestly don't believe that a lot of individuals, specifically a lot of women, actually understand what relationships are supposed to be about.

[00:09:22]It's not about who takes care of the other. It's about the relationship itself and two people caring about each other and being there for each other. No wonder there's so many single people out there.

[00:09:33]>> We don't need you. A lot of women have given up on the idea that men are going to be there to provide for them. We >> News flash. You're a grown adult.

[00:09:40]Provide for yourself. Don't expect others to do it for you.

[00:09:43]>> We don't give a [ __ ] if you're actually in our lives or not.

[00:09:46]>> That's rather hard to believe considering the online tirades that I keep seeing.

[00:09:49]>> You better be adding significant value if you want to earn a place in our lives.

[00:09:53]>> Indeed. And I can only imagine how upset a lot of women out there would be if gentlemen actually started adopting the same philosophy and insisted that women bring something to the relationship other than just what they look like.

[00:10:06]>> Men need to step up, but at the same time, women claim they don't need men.

[00:10:12]It is a confusing contradiction. While some might present it as a revolutionary gift to the world, adult women providing for themselves is simply the baseline of being a functional adult rather than relying on men to fund their lifestyles.

[00:10:29]The reality is that many women maintain this independent stance until the weight of modern life becomes overwhelming, at which point they often begin to seek out men to take care of them. This cultural paradox creates a moving goalpost dynamic that leaves many men feeling sidelined yet simultaneously demanded of. On one hand, the narrative of total independence suggests that a man's traditional roles provider, protector, and partner are obsolete or even intrusive.

[00:11:07]However, the call for men to step up usually implies that they should still embody those traditional strengths whenever a gap needs to be filled or a burden becomes too heavy to carry alone.

[00:11:21]>> You guys, I'm so tired of being an independent woman. I don't want to be that. I don't I don't want to pay my bills in full, okay? I want to go havsies. I don't care. Okay? I want someone to pump my gas. I don't want to do this.

[00:11:36]So, the guy that I like um told me that he doesn't like me back and doesn't think of me like that and also doesn't want a relationship, but like that's so honest and sweet and like I feel like I wouldn't be that honest or sweet with someone that I what I feel like he's in love with me. Honestly, >> you need help.

[00:11:55]>> Women just do not care about men's opinions. Like, we don't care if you think we're attractive. We don't care if you think that we look old. We don't care if you don't agree with our choice not to have kids or to have them to get married or to not because your opinion is so worthless to us, you know, like it's like asking a used toilet brush what they think. Like it's obsolete.

[00:12:23]There's no point. From such a place of hate as well. All your opinions come from a deep self-hatred and you project that out onto women and we know and we're on to it and that's why we couldn't give a [ __ ] about you. And if you need any further proof of this, just look at the men that comment on my videos where I'm just talking about my lifestyle. There will always be men in those comments spouting hate because they hate themselves. The hatred for men in this society is so deep that for a woman to compare men to a used toilet brush says more than enough about the current cultural climate. She's claiming that women don't care about males opinions anymore. But that isn't true.

[00:13:06]They don't have to say it verbally for their actions to tell a different story.

[00:13:11]There are many women today who dress up, go outside and come back shocked that no men are hitting on them or calling them beautiful, revealing a massive disconnect between the rhetoric of independence and the biological reality of seeking validation. You cannot spend your days devaluing the very people you secretly hope will notice you and then act surprised when those people finally decide to look the other way. This woman can cope all she wants, but many women absolutely do crave the opinion of men because at the end of the day, social media posturing cannot override basic human nature. The I don't care what men think mantra is frequently a loud performative shield used to mask the frustration of not being valued by the specific men they actually admire.

[00:14:02]>> Did people stop drinking milk? Because why is every single man short? Like, I swear I'm not that tall. Every time I get measured, it's 5'8, but I'm now thinking maybe 5'9. I don't know. I'm like being gaslit on my own height. But I wear, let's say, 3 in 4 in heels.

[00:14:16]Okay. 6 feet. I'm 6t tall when I go out.

[00:14:18]Why am I looking above everyone? Every crowd. I'm like, am I in the Wizard of Oz with the Munchkins? Like, I'm confused. I'm genuinely lost. And every man is like, "Whoa, you're lowkey tall.

[00:14:33]Tall. Tall." Like, sure, I'm a little bit above average, but y'all are acting like I'm over here six feet flatfooted.

[00:14:40]How about you're short and maybe you need to start Maybe the Got Milk foundation needs to come back. Got milk.

[00:14:47]You need to start having milk around your lips or something, bro. I don't know. I'm really getting like stressed out. Like, it's already slim pickings with the way that these men act, but the fact that y'all are going to be miniature is just a lot for me.

[00:15:00]>> I know it's Sunday and it's the Lord's day, but I'm trying to get bent for the rent. I'm trying to do something strange for some change. I'm trying to I'm I'm trying to do anything but work and be an independent woman cuz I'm tired. I'm at a point in my life where I'm ready to just bust it wide open for somebody's grandpa just to be taken care of. Cuz I'm too cute. I'm too pretty to be working this much. Make it make sense.

[00:15:22]Like I should be laying on the beach somewhere with a drink in my hands, a man like rubbing my feet being spooled, somebody fanning me with a leaf. But I'm going to work because I decided to be an independent woman who DON'T NEED NO MOTHER. I need one. You hear me? I need one now. Where you at? I need one.

[00:15:41]>> I mean, damn. Things must be really tough for her as an independent woman.

[00:15:46]For her to say she's willing to get bent for some change to get her rent paid is crazy. It really paints a grim picture of how thin the safety net is when someone who prides themselves on standing on their own two feet feels backed into a corner like that. You can hear the desperation leaking through the bravado because nobody considers trading their dignity or their peace of mind for a roof over their head unless the alternative is the cold pavement. A lot of these independent women aren't really independent.

[00:16:23]Many do it because they want to prove they can compete with men, but really they're hurting themselves in the process. This relentless drive to match a masculine blueprint of success often leads to a hollow victory where the external accolades hide a deep internal exhaustion. I mean, this woman stated that she's tired of working to the point where she's willing to sell the kitty for payment.

[00:16:51]>> Another day of doing everything by myself because I'm single and I have new friends.

[00:16:58]But at least at least I don't have fake people in my life and I'm not getting a cheated one. So, we're winning. The heing. Well, maybe the she's aren't sheing.

[00:17:09]Hear me out, ladies.

[00:17:12]What are we doing? We want good husbands, right? And we're like, "Gh, the men are terrible these days." Okay, what are we doing as women to prepare to be a good godly wife? We want good godly husbands, but what are we doing to prepare ourselves right now?

[00:17:29]Maybe the men aren't mening, the he's aren't heing because the she's aren't sheing too good. Are we dressing modestly?

[00:17:39]Are we controlling our tongue?

[00:17:42]Are we practicing good godly habits? Are we, you know, the things? I'm pro-women. I'm not a feminist.

[00:17:54]But I'm not against women, right? But perhaps before we throw all the blame on the men, let's look at ourselves and see what we're doing. How are we helping?

[00:18:04]What are we doing to prepare ourselves to be good, godly wives, good, godly mothers?

[00:18:09]can't just throw all the blame on the men when you're not really doing your part either. So, you know, >> as a matter of fact, a lot of modern women today see marriage as a prison for them and they see submission as slavery.

[00:18:24]Yet, they fail to realize that any structure requiring commitment also requires sacrifice. Many of them want a husband, but only if he functions as a silent partner who provides resources and security without expecting any authority or traditional respect in return. They want the title and the lifestyle of a wife, but they want to maintain the autonomy of a single woman.

[00:18:52]essentially looking for a roommate with benefits who covers the bills and handles the heavy lifting while they remain emotionally and socially unattached to his leadership. So many of these women are not practicing godly habits. And that fundamental shift is exactly why the modern dating landscape feels so fractured and combative.

[00:19:14]Instead of pursuing the virtues of modesty, gentleness, and selfless love, the focus has shifted toward narcissism, entitlement, and a me first theology.

[00:19:27]>> So, I've spent my whole life being a strong independent woman, and that [ __ ] ends today. So, I was helping one of the clients at my job get all of her stuff packed and moved out cuz she's going to a different place today. Well, it gets time where we need to get her stuff taken outside so that it can get packed up into the van so that when the person who's going to drive her gets here, they can just go. And I keep telling this person like, "Let's go. Let's get it done." And she's like, "No, I'm waiting for a man to wake up and help me." And I'm like, "Why can't we just do it? Me and you, we can just get it done. Boom, boom, boom." And she's like, "No, I want one of these strong ass men to help me."

[00:20:07]And I didn't believe her. I was like, "I could do it. I can be a strong man. I am a strong man. But I just said, "All right, you know what? Cool. Find someone to do it for you." She had people do it all for her. She did not have to lift a finger, and neither will I for the rest of my [ __ ] life.

[00:20:26]>> If a man asks you, "What do you bring to the table?" The infamous question. Ask him, "What are you lacking that you need me to provide?"

[00:20:38]Oh, that's easy, cupcake.

[00:20:40]Acknowledgement, appreciation, loyalty, dignity, respect, and most of all, peace. You know the things none of you offer. Mostly because you don't even know what they mean. So, next question.

[00:20:56]The only types of women who get offended when a man asks what they bring to the table are usually those who bring nothing to the table. They become defensive because they believe their mere presence should be enough. This reaction often stems from a sense of entitlement that bypasses the fundamental logic of any healthy partnership, reciprocity. When a woman views herself as the prize rather than a partner, she treats the relationship as a one-way street where the man is expected to audition for her favor while she remains exempt from self-improvement or contribution.

[00:21:35]This mindset ignores the fact that a high value man who is already providing stability, emotional intelligence, and resources is looking for an asset, not a liability. If a woman finds the question insulting, it is often because she hasn't taken the time to cultivate a personality, a skill set, or a supportive nature that compliments a man's life.

[00:22:00]>> I have a question for the single girlies.

[00:22:04]Yes, it's only for the single girls right now cuz they probably are the only ones that know what I'm going through and I'm just having such like an annoying day. four different stories that I can tell you of different guys that are just completely ignoring me right now. And I'm just wondering if if this is what everybody's experiencing.

[00:22:24]Look, I'm all for you girls that want to be independent and do everything your own and be able to say that you did it.

[00:22:30]However, I am not one of those girls and I don't want that. I want someone to do everything for me. And I feel like that's so like frowned upon and everyone's like, "Oh my god, I'm an independent woman. like I have equal right. Guys, just can we just not ruin it for the rest of us? Because I would really appreciate it if someone would um you know, actually pop my hood and do my oil change, do my brakes for me, take my car and do take the garbage out. I'm not touching a garbage bag. I don't want to do that. I'm a girl. I'm I'm a girly girl and I'm content being that. I am content letting a man do man things. I don't have a desire to do that just so I could prove a point and be like I'm an independent woman, but I'm not. That would be a lie. I'm not a liar.

[00:23:17]So, am I the only one? I feel like I'm alone here. Like, why why would we have to be the man? I don't want to be a man. I'm not a man. If I wanted to be a man, I would be a man. I'm not a man.

[00:23:32]Like I I'm a woman, not a man. Don't want to do man things. I want to do woman things. I want to go shopping. I want to get my nails done. I want a man to have dirty hands from work so that way my hands can look pretty. Like I I'm just not understanding the whole like I'm independent. I do everything for myself. I do everything on my own.

[00:23:56]Not me.

[00:23:58]But I I full I'm fully aware and I fully admit that that is just not for me. So good for you. I'm proud of you. But let's just not ruin it for the rest of us. Okay, let's just get that straight.

[00:24:15]Thanks.

[00:24:16]>> You notice the push is always for men to be something like this caption says, "Can we normalize men being men?" But men are being men. Nothing has changed except for the fact that men have noticed that women aren't women anymore.

[00:24:33]So, they've dialed back on a lot of things. Men haven't lost their instinct to provide, protect, or lead. They have simply realized that there is no return on investment for those behaviors in a culture that mocks their efforts and rejects their nature. When the feminine energy that used to inspire and reward masculine sacrifice disappears, men don't lose their masculinity. They simply stop exporting it to a world that doesn't appreciate it. It is a basic law of social dynamics that men go where they are celebrated, not where they are merely tolerated or viewed as a utility.

[00:25:16]For decades, the narrative has been about women leveling up and becoming bosses who don't need anyone. But now that men have taken them at their word and stepped back, the outcry is that men have somehow failed. In reality, men have just become more selective with their energy.

[00:25:36]>> Taking a woman out of her masculine and guiding her into her feminine, that's for the men. Boys can't do that.

[00:25:44]I don't want to be independent anymore.

[00:25:47]I want someone to take care of me.

[00:25:49]>> I watch two men sitting at a table, three men sitting at a table alone and I watch pretty young girls walk up to the table and I see the men look at each other like who are these girls? Like why do they want to like we don't know them type thing. Like get away from our table. And in my head I'm like, >> "Hey guys, this is the whole point. The whole point of getting the table is so that those two girls actually want to speak to you because if we weren't in the setting, they wouldn't. I mean, it sounds like they just got rejected. I'm not trying to say that in a mean or negative way. Rejection hurts. Rejection sucks. And these women have every right to feel sad about being rejected, but to not acknowledge it as rejection and to not see it as like, okay, we went to this bar. We found these guys attractive. We tried to walk over to their table. They gave us a look like they didn't want us to be there.

[00:26:36]probably because they didn't want us to be there because they're not attracted or interested in talking to us. And there could be a myriad of reasons for that. Maybe they have girlfriends. Maybe they're not looking for a relationship.

[00:26:45]There could be any number of reasons.

[00:26:46]But the bottom line is that these guys were at the bar to do whatever they wanted to do, but they were not interested in those women. Like, they just weren't interested. And why is it okay for women to say that they go to bars just to hang out with their friends and to enjoy the environment, but when men go to bars to do the same thing?

[00:27:02]Some women get on TikTok and say, "Oh my gosh, why are men at the bar just to hang out with their friends?" If women can do it, then why can't men also just go to hang out with their friends? And they also might have been there to pick up women, but maybe these women just simply weren't their type. As much as some women will see other women and say, "Oh my gosh, you're so gorgeous. Why are these guys not going for you?" Men also have their preferences, too. Women could be extremely gorgeous to a number of people, but that doesn't mean that every man is going to be interested in her.

[00:27:26]Men also have their own type, too. They also have their own preferences, too.

[00:27:29]So, I just think coming in with this ego and acting like, "Oh my gosh, I'm at this bar and these guys are at this table and I want to talk to them and don't they know that their whole job of being here is supposed to be to want to talk to me?" I just don't agree with that narrative. People can go to a bar for any number of reasons. And even if you are a hot, young, attractive woman, there's still going to be tons of guys who just aren't interested in you. And I think that's sort of dropping like your ego a little bit and having a bit more humility, understanding that you could be super hot, gorgeous, amazing. That doesn't mean that everybody's going to be interested in you. And that doesn't mean that you need to get all defensive when somebody isn't. But that is just my personal opinion. So, let me know what you guys think. Bye.

[00:28:07]>> I mean, I don't see the issue here. Some women approached a table full of men, and the men simply weren't interested.

[00:28:16]Can't a man have a preference regarding the type of woman he likes? What this woman is describing is something that happens to men all the time. For generations, men have had to develop a thick skin regarding rejection.

[00:28:31]Understanding that being turned down is a natural, if uncomfortable, part of the dating process. However, there seems to be a double standard where a man's rejection of a woman is viewed as an act of hostility or gatekeeping rather than a simple lack of chemistry or a misalignment of standards. When men exercise their right to choose, they are often met with shock because the modern narrative suggests that any woman's interest should be automatically validated and reciprocated.

[00:29:08]This reaction overlooks the fact that men are allowed to have high standards regarding the character, lifestyle, and attitude of the women they invite into their space.

[00:29:20]>> Girl, do you get the nerd? Hate the guy that you're like, "He's not my type."

[00:29:23]But your type is unemployed. Your type is a skateboarder. Your type is not going to be able to raise the family that you want to raise. Do you understand? Your type is the accumulation of media and socialization that you were exposed to in like middle school.

[00:29:35]>> Can I just say dating is not the [ __ ] weak? Like I've already been home, sorted out the cat, showered, changed, redid my makeup, and now I'm heading out again. Haven't eaten anything.

[00:29:56]And of course, I'm running late because when am I ever not running late, but like this is so much. And I've got like a full a full day of [ __ ] tomorrow.

[00:30:09]Like can I just fast forward through the dating part and just be married like or engaged at least or in a relationship? I don't think that's asking too for too much.

[00:30:17]>> Actually, that is asking too much. You can't just fast forward and get married to someone instantly. Dating is harder now for many women because they wanted to play the long game, having fun earlier on and then trying to find the perfect man later in life. It seems that plan isn't really working out for many right now. This strategy often ignores the reality of how dating markets and personal priorities shift over time. By the time many women decide they are ready to settle down, they find that the highquality men they ignored in their 20s have either moved on, married, or are now seeking partners who prioritized building a life rather than delaying it.

[00:31:05]The have fun now, commit later approach assumes that the same pool of men will be waiting indefinitely. But life doesn't stay in a holding pattern. As time passes, the criteria for a perfect man often become more rigid. While the number of available men who meet those standards naturally shrinks.

[00:31:27]>> Someone explain why men choose the crazy girls. I genuinely don't understand.

[00:31:30]Should I become crazy? Should I become psychotic? Because I continue to get over by mediocre men. Over by men who genuinely are not hot enough to be acting the way that they're acting. And I don't get it. A lot of you think that just because you're an adult, you have to be an independent woman, and it's hurting your dating life. I constantly see videos about the challenges of dating as an independent woman. But I honestly think this whole thing is very self-imposed because no guy worth having has an issue with the fact that you can support yourself, have a house, apartment, etc. The problem with being independent isn't that you don't need a man to survive. It's that you're acting like you don't even want one. Obviously, no one needs a man to survive. But if you were constantly hearing from your partner, "I don't need you. I'd be fine without you." Wouldn't that be hurtful?

[00:32:08]It makes you think, "Okay, fine. Go be alone then." if all they're talking about is how great it would be on their own. And just because you support yourself doesn't mean you have to act like this. Not least of all because it's not even true. Assuming you want a relationship, then your goal is not to be independent. So act like it. It's a good positive thing to depend on other people socially and emotionally. Just because you're independent financially does not mean that you need to be independent in every aspect of your life. I think a lot of women see this mindset as like a way to stay guarded and not get hurt. Like if you never need anything from a man, then it means that he can't use that leverage against you.

[00:32:37]And sure, I guess, but that's kind of like trying to play catch and then never throwing someone the ball cuz you don't want to lose it. Relationships can't happen without some degree of vulnerability. And saying, "I'm an independent woman who don't need no man." is basically saying that you're not going to do your part. So, I'm sorry, but of course, dating is going to be hard for you.

[00:32:52]>> Being an independent woman is hurting their dating life, and it's only because they make it their whole personality.

[00:32:59]They chant the same song over and over again about how independent they are.

[00:33:05]And they think it matters to a man, but they fail to realize that a man's attraction isn't a mirror of a woman's professional resume. While a man might respect her drive, he isn't looking for a competitor or a co-CEO to come home to. When a woman leads every conversation with her paycheck, her degrees, and her refusal to need anyone, she is essentially telling men that there is no vacancy in her life for them to fill. I agree that these women are single because of themselves, largely because they have confused capability with desiraability.

[00:33:46]A man of substance already knows how to take care of himself. So, he isn't looking for a woman who can do the same just to prove a point. He's looking for the things he can't provide for himself, which are feminine warmth, loyalty, and emotional support.