Tuesday Talks: How to Know if They Want You

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[00:00:22]>> Welcome to the Swing Nation podcast, a podcast by swingers for swingers, where we look to educate others and push back [music] on the negative stigmas and misconceptions associated with our lifestyle. Come with us and share our pineapple journey as we travel the globe, interview the experts, learn, and grow [music] together. Join the nation.

[00:00:44]>> [music] [music] [music] >> Talking Tuesday with Dan and Lacy.

[00:01:05]Ooh, how about that high note?

[00:01:07]>> It's perfect.

[00:01:08]Hey there, pineapple people, and welcome to the Swing Nation podcast. We are your hosts, Northern Guy >> and Southern Girl.

[00:01:14]>> And we are back with another electrifying episode of Tuesday Talks.

[00:01:20]>> We are.

[00:01:21]>> Talking Tuesday with Doug and Lacy.

[00:01:25]>> I feel like we need like cartoon characters.

[00:01:27]>> We got less Doug and Lacy at Naughty in New Orleans >> True.

[00:01:31]>> did at um Splash Houston.

[00:01:34]>> True. But it's funny, I saw you posted something on Reddit and I clicked on it cuz I like to read the comments.

[00:01:39]Sometimes somebody said, "Hey Lacy."

[00:01:41]>> Hey Lacy.

[00:01:42]>> Yeah.

[00:01:42]>> Uh also, we had somebody email us um with a picture of their ID and their name >> Yeah.

[00:01:50]>> is Lacy.

[00:01:51]>> It is.

[00:01:52]>> W A C Y, but it is a male.

[00:01:55]>> So me and you didn't talk about it, but do you know I was married before?

[00:01:59]His last name was my previous last name.

[00:02:03]Did you catch that?

[00:02:05]>> Uh yes, I think so. Yeah.

[00:02:06]>> I thought that was kind of like small world.

[00:02:08]>> Uh-huh. Yeah.

[00:02:10]Yeah.

[00:02:10]>> That's not my last name anymore.

[00:02:11]>> No, but his name last name is your ex's last name, yeah.

[00:02:14]>> Correct. Yes.

[00:02:15]>> Your son's last name.

[00:02:16]>> My son's last name, yeah. But small world. But I remember I told you so if y'all don't >> have the same middle name as you, too?

[00:02:22]>> No, I don't think so.

[00:02:23]>> It wasn't Wacie Lou?

[00:02:25]>> I don't think so.

[00:02:26]>> I'm going to go back and look.

[00:02:27]>> when I was on live, like I don't know, it's been a while, somebody commented and said my name is Wacie. And we talked about it on the podcast and Dan was like, "You're ridiculous. Nobody >> "They're [ __ ] with you. They're trolling you. Nobody's name is Wacie."

[00:02:37]>> Yeah.

[00:02:38]>> It's not a good name. Sorry. Sorry, Wacie.

[00:02:40]>> That Yeah, that is a That's a You know, somebody else, speaking of names, somebody commented on one of our Instagram and said, "Where did the name Lacy come from?" I'm all, "Yeah, Lacy."

[00:02:51]>> It was actually my grandfather's middle name.

[00:02:53]>> I was going to say Lacy is a uh gender-neutral name, right?

[00:02:57]>> Um and they were like, "That's really cool. I love when people come up with their stage names." And I'm like, "It's not my state Lacy is my real name."

[00:03:04]>> Yeah, we get that all the time. Like, Dan and Lacy is our It's our It's our government name.

[00:03:08]>> Yeah. Truth, a little like if you've been around long enough, I actually went by my my dad's sister's. It's a little [ __ ] up. My dad's sister's name for like the first month >> Not Not the podcast?

[00:03:21]>> Not on the podcast, but like on social media.

[00:03:24]Um which she was younger than She would have thought that was totally cool. It wasn't like a weird thing. It's not weird for me. It could be weird to other people. It was just too hard.

[00:03:33]>> Yeah. It's Well, it's too hard to have fake names.

[00:03:36]>> Yeah, it's too hard to have fake names.

[00:03:37]So, I was like >> hard to keep up with all that. Even our friends that have fake names, you know how many how many times we've had to edit the podcast?

[00:03:42]>> Yeah.

[00:03:43]>> Uh just the last episode because we're saying people's names that have fake names and stuff, yeah.

[00:03:47]>> Yeah.

[00:03:48]Yeah, it's it's hard to keep up with.

[00:03:49]So, no, our real name's Dan and Lacy.

[00:03:51]>> Well, the thing is, like, how many Dan and Lacy's are there in the world? Like, you know what I mean? Like, I don't feel like you knowing just that >> Yeah.

[00:03:59]>> is enough to where you're going to >> Maybe, I don't know.

[00:04:01]Anyway, let's get to this week's Tuesday talk. It came in yesterday. So, this is >> Fresh off the press.

[00:04:07]>> Fresh. Okay, it says, "Hi there." She said she would send a video, but she couldn't get over the awkwardness, so >> Yes, so she was she was thinking about doing our first um video question on the big screen.

[00:04:20]>> Yes.

[00:04:20]>> And but she said it was too awkward to to do to record.

[00:04:23]>> Yeah.

[00:04:23]>> So, >> So, she goes by Rose, so it says, "Myself and my husband are less than a year into the lifestyle. For the most part, we haven't had to do any of the pursuing. Everyone has seemed to come to us, which is great, but putting us in a weird place now that we're starting to be the ones to reach out to others.

[00:04:40]Additionally, we've made some other new friends that are also sort of struggling with this particular aspect of the swinging world.

[00:04:48]What are your clues, signs, hacks for figuring out whether a couple you're talking to are blowing you off or just aren't interested? At what point do you give up trying and move along? Thanks in advance. Maybe one day my OnlyFans will take off and we'll see you on a cruise."

[00:05:06]And they go by the Roses, and she's a cutie.

[00:05:09]>> And she sent a few pictures.

[00:05:10]>> Yes, I'm looking at them.

[00:05:11]>> And some of them are a little graphic, uh and I wasn't mad about looking at them.

[00:05:15]>> Not at all.

[00:05:15]>> Yeah.

[00:05:16]>> They're they're a young couple, a cute couple.

[00:05:18]>> Apparently, they have an OnlyFans. Um >> Apparently.

[00:05:20]>> Maybe they need a collab, I don't know.

[00:05:21]>> I don't know.

[00:05:21]>> Uh >> Anyway, so that is their question. They they didn't have to work for it in the beginning, and now they they're needing to, like, feel people out, and they don't know how to >> This is a little off-topic, but do you feel like when you first come into the lifestyle, you're always going to have that bump of you're the new couple or you're >> actually had a conversation with a couple this weekend because someone had called them the new couple a year or so ago.

[00:05:50]>> And insinuated that maybe people were only interested in them because they were the new couple, right?

[00:05:54]>> No, I think that you would be lying if you sat here and said that having a new couple come in doesn't spark some interest, right? You know, I mean, like >> Right.

[00:06:03]>> Just like if you have a new kid at school, yeah.

[00:06:05]>> blood, whatever, yeah.

[00:06:06]>> But I also But I don't feel like that takes away if they're good like solid couple that you genuinely enjoy like >> be honest, a new couple can come in and if you're not attracted to them and you're not vibing with them >> It doesn't matter.

[00:06:17]>> going to want to [ __ ] them, right? But when a new couple comes in that is hot and attractive and then it's like, oh.

[00:06:22]>> Yeah, of course they're going to be like fresh meat, right? But they're also as long as they're like a good couple and and the vibe is there, that can continue on.

[00:06:31]>> Right. It can be an ongoing thing.

[00:06:31]>> Yeah, it doesn't just end after, you know, you've >> [ __ ] one time.

[00:06:35]>> Yeah.

[00:06:35]>> Right.

[00:06:36]>> Um so, yeah, we actually >> do get how like when you are a new couple like everybody in the friend group might be kind of like lining up to get their turn that first time, whatever, >> I think that goes I think that's just like society. Like >> Yeah.

[00:06:49]>> You take like when we were in school and a new kid would come to school >> wants to talk to them, yeah.

[00:06:53]>> Yeah, everyone wants to talk to them.

[00:06:54]Everyone wants to be their boyfriend or their girlfriend or be their friend or whatever, you know. So, I I don't think it's like a swinger thing. I think it's just like a society thing.

[00:07:03]>> No, I agree. I agree with that, yeah.

[00:07:04]>> Okay, so basically she wanted to know, how do you know if >> Right. So, it sounds like they've gotten through that bump now and now they're kind of like, oh [ __ ] we might actually have to start talking to people. We might have to start initiating with people. How can we tell these people that are we're talking to, how do we know if they're actually interested or not?

[00:07:21]>> And the truth is I'm that's hard and I'm probably not a good judge of that because a lot of people talk to us and I just I don't assume anyone wants to [ __ ] you know, I just think that they're just being nice cuz we have a podcast and are being our friend, you know?

[00:07:36]But I will say the people that have the most luck or at least it seems to me are the success are the ones that just put it out there.

[00:07:44]>> Mhm.

[00:07:45]>> The ones that are like, "Hey, we're going to go [ __ ] Y'all interested?"

[00:07:47]>> Yep.

[00:07:48]>> Um because at the end of the day everybody wants to [ __ ] you know? And at that point, if the couple's like, "Oh, well, um maybe then they might be blowing you off." You know? They might actually just be tired or might have other plans, but they could very well be blowing you off. At least you kind of know, you know?

[00:08:04]You have a good idea of what's going on.

[00:08:07]>> 100% that's the right answer, right? I think too often in this lifestyle in this community, we play this guessing game.

[00:08:16]>> I'm the worst at it.

[00:08:17]>> When we could just use our words.

[00:08:19]>> Yeah, and I we're all there.

[00:08:21]>> Yeah, we all know why we're there. We're all And honestly, most people there probably want to [ __ ] It's more people than you think. You you have insecurities and you have all these, you know, you are doubting yourself in your own head, so are they. And so the most time, the reason an orgy doesn't happen or sex doesn't happen at the end of the night cuz nobody can get out of their own way and just say the things that they want to say. And that's a lot of the reason we've kind of become the in our friend group and we've backed off from this a little bit here in the last year or so, but we've always been like the orchestrator. And it's all And it's like everybody in our friend group and there's a few others in our friend group that are pretty good orchestrators, too, but there's, you know, only two or three couples out of like 40 that are usually the ones that'll be like, "Hey guys, let's have an orgy tonight. Let's do it in this room at this time. And hey, you, you, you, and you, you guys want to come? Yeah, okay, let's go." There's Out of our entire friend group of like 40 or 50 couples, there's only a handful of people that actually do that.

[00:09:17]>> They're all [ __ ] Yeah, they're all [ __ ] babe.

[00:09:19]>> who I'm talking about the I'm talking about the instigators, the initiators.

[00:09:23]>> Yeah, I think that you do a very good job of being like, "Hey, we're going to go." But [clears throat] I I think it happens even >> Yeah.

[00:09:29]>> I think there's more. I think out of 40 there's probably half that do.

[00:09:32]>> Yeah. But what I'm saying is it's that's a harder thing than most people realize.

[00:09:36]>> you are 100% correct there, yeah.

[00:09:38]>> a lot of people are missing out on experiences, connections, >> afraid.

[00:09:42]>> and they end up going home or they end up going to bed with alone or with just their partner because they just don't put themselves out there. They don't They're too afraid to say, >> No, I >> "Hey, we're into you. We're going to go to the playroom in an hour. If you guys want to join us, that'd be awesome. If not, we'll just have fun with it." You know, like >> And there's a fine line to that. You know, you don't want to be too pushy.

[00:10:02]You don't want to come up You know, so like there's an art to it. You know, you don't want >> you say it once and they don't bite, don't say it 5 minutes later or then an hour hour later or then the next day or then the next like >> No, the truth is sometimes like I'm thinking we just we're we're coming off a naughty in New Orleans and there's just one couple that we really want to [ __ ] and it's just never happened.

[00:10:19]>> And they straight up put it out there.

[00:10:20]>> And they straight up put it out there, but like we were already in our room and our comfy you know, comfy clothes and we were you know, so it wasn't because we didn't like them or we don't want to We do.

[00:10:29]>> then like so they were like, "Hey, you guys want to hook up tonight?" And I straight up texted them back and was like, "We want to hook up with you."

[00:10:35]>> Yeah.

[00:10:35]>> But Lacy's already half asleep. Can we get a rain check? So at least they know, right? So like It's not like they put it out there and we like blew them off. It was they got the response of not tonight, but let's make this [ __ ] happen. And we still ended up [ __ ] them, but we're we're going to make that happen.

[00:10:49]>> to.

[00:10:50]>> Yeah. But you know, I think, you know, and could they have sent that text and we could have replied back and been like, "Oh yeah, maybe. Like let's see what happens." Sure.

[00:10:58]>> Which I'm really bad about that. Even if I really want to [ __ ] them. I'm I struggle with this probably more so than you do.

[00:11:05]Um I have to remind myself we're all here to [ __ ] We have you know, like And like I'm bad about like going like leading up to events I'm like, "Okay, I'm going to put myself out there. I'm going to be brave. I'm going to talk to people if I'm feeling the vibe. I'm just going to say it." And then I get to the party and like completely forget everything I just like built myself up.

[00:11:24]>> Yeah, it is even going into this naughty you were turned up and you were like, "I want to be a dirty [ __ ] and I want to get, you know, DP'd every night and all this." And I was like, all right. And then I even said I'm like, you always say this and then at the end of the night you're tired or you're whatever and >> Okay, we [ __ ] two out of four nights.

[00:11:40]>> So I'm not complaining about. I'm just saying you going into this was like, I'm going to like turn up. Yeah. And it was that was probably like normal, like average, like you know, yeah.

[00:11:48]>> Yeah. So I think you can go in with like the best intentions, but it can be you can easily >> is you do get tired. You do get drunk.

[00:11:55]You do get, you know, you sometimes you you just aren't feeling it in that exact moment, you know, and that's and that's okay, you know.

[00:12:01]>> No, I totally agree.

[00:12:02]>> Yeah. But I do think the answer to answer their question of how do you know if somebody is interested or not, you ask them.

[00:12:10]>> Yeah. You do.

[00:12:11]>> You let them know that you are interested and you do that as bluntly but as politely as possible >> Yeah.

[00:12:20]>> and then you gauge their response.

[00:12:22]>> Yeah.

[00:12:22]>> And that is a hard thing to do because you're going to be told no sometimes.

[00:12:27]>> Yes, you are.

[00:12:27]>> And that sucks.

[00:12:29]>> It does.

[00:12:29]>> And it hurts and it's going to bring up all those insecurities that you've had your whole life and it's going to make you feel less than.

[00:12:38]Um but the couples that we know that are the most successful and have the most experiences and kind of living their best life um out there openly >> They're just putting it out there.

[00:12:48]>> are the ones and I will tell you there are sometimes where I see these couples that are putting themselves out there and I'm thinking like, there's no way in hell they have a shot with that couple.

[00:12:55]Like >> And they do it.

[00:12:56]>> And next thing you know, they're going back to a room somewhere or they're making it happen and you're like, damn. I wish I had said something to that couple.

[00:13:05]>> [laughter] >> You know what I mean? Like, [ __ ] >> Yeah.

[00:13:07]>> Uh so I definitely think that is the answer that it you know, playing that guessing game is not don't try to read between the lines. Don't try to, you know, just say, "Hey, really into you guys and if you guys are into us, let's let's try to schedule some time to make something happen."

[00:13:23]>> No, and honestly the the two times that we played this last event, it was cuz people put it out there.

[00:13:30]They came right out. They put it out.

[00:13:32]One actually messaged me. She She Snapchatted me and said, "Hey." You know, it was like in the middle of the day. "Hey, if you're interested, this is what we're thinking. Would you be down?"

[00:13:42]And the other time, somebody just walked right The wife walked up to me and said, "Hey, we're going to go play and we'd love for y'all to come. Would you like to come?"

[00:13:48]And then that And it worked both times.

[00:13:51]So.

[00:13:52]>> Yeah, please. If you are in our friend group and you want to [ __ ] us, please do that. Yes. And honestly, it it makes me so happy because it takes all the pressure off of us.

[00:14:00]I don't like being the one that has to coordinate and and try to, you know, pick which couples are going to do what.

[00:14:07]So, if you come up to us and say, "Hey, us that them and them are going to go [ __ ] Would you guys want to come with us?" And we do, we're That makes it easy for us, right?

[00:14:14]>> Yes.

[00:14:15]>> And we're going to jump on that bandwagon nine out of 10 times, you know.

[00:14:19]>> Yeah. So, put yourself out there.

[00:14:21]Know that some people are going to tell you no and that is okay.

[00:14:25]And have fun.

[00:14:26]>> Exactly.

[00:14:27]>> Yeah.

[00:14:28]>> All right. Well, I hope that helps answer that Tuesday Talk question for you. Also, super nice pictures. You guys are hot.

[00:14:34]>> Yes, thank you.

[00:14:35]>> see you at event. If you're ever near where near the Nashville area, you know, and you need you need some collabs.

[00:14:40]Reach out. Well, we we actually have been looking for some OnlyFans collabs here recently.

[00:14:44]>> We've been slacking.

[00:14:45]>> We have not made a lot of OnlyFans content and we actually have gotten on like the Reddit pages and kind of try to look in our local area and see if we can find some collabs. So, I don't know. You know, if you're in the greater Nashville area and you you maybe maybe >> They put your city. They're not anywhere close.

[00:15:00]>> Oh, okay.

[00:15:01]>> [laughter] >> Well, if somebody else is and they, you know, email us.

[00:15:05]>> Yeah.

[00:15:05]>> Uh okay.

[00:15:07]Uh if you have a Tuesday Talk question, we'd love to hear from you. There's a few different ways you can get a hold of us. You can email us at [email protected].

[00:15:17]You can send an audio file to that email. You can send a video file to that email. We'll put you up here in the studio on the big screen uh and listen to your question or you can call or text and that phone number is >> 972-302-7716 >> One more time.

[00:15:34]>> 972-302-7716 >> Shoot us a text, shoot us a message, let us know your questions, send some dick pics to Lacy. You guys got our phone number. Lacy checks it almost daily now.

[00:15:48]Now, if you text her thinking that she's going to sex with you or you think you're going to have some kind of like romantic, you know, if you're trying to text her behind your wife's back or you think you're going to have some kind of like What was those like the the numbers you used to put the have to pay to call?

[00:16:07]>> number?

[00:16:07]>> Yeah, you think you're going to have some kind of like >> Like sexting line?

[00:16:09]>> Yeah, some kind of like phone sex line experience with Lacy? Probably not going to happen.

[00:16:13]>> No.

[00:16:14]>> Probably not going to happen, but if you have a question, uh we'll try to get to it.

[00:16:19]>> Yeah.

[00:16:19]>> All right, anything else for the Swing Nation listeners, Lacy?

[00:16:22]>> That's it.

[00:16:23]>> All right, guys. I think with that in a world full of apples >> Be the pineapple.

[00:16:28]>> Be the pineapple, guys.

[00:16:29]>> Bye.

[00:16:29]>> Bye.

[00:16:35]If you've enjoyed our podcast and want to support [music] us, leave a five-star review wherever you're listening. If you want to see more of our content, you can find links to Snapchat, Twitter, [music] Instagram, OnlyFans and more in the show notes. Come join the conversation with us and other swinger content creators on our Swinger Society Discord server. If you have questions or feedback, email them to us at [email protected].

[00:16:57]Make sure you head on over to theswingnation.net and keep up-to-date on all things Swing Nation. We thank you so much for joining us and we'll see you next time. Goodbye.

[00:17:26]>> That's so hot.