The Big Hit Is Basically Tarantino Meets 90's MTV

Added: 2026-05-23

[00:00:00]So, what is this that we're watching?

[00:00:01]Was it requested or something? We talked about ska music in some one of our videos and you mentioned SLC Punk.

[00:00:07]>> SLC Punk, we were talking Yeah, maybe it was that and someone mentioned in the comments and I was like, that's on the list. It's on my list anyway. A, it's a comedy. B, it's got a great cast. C, it's something I haven't watched since it probably came out, but I remember liking it a lot and it's in the vein of like very bad things. Ooh.

[00:00:25]>> Like that's what it feels like to me.

[00:00:26]Like it's one of those. I like very bad things.

[00:00:29]>> But I also haven't watched it since it came out, so I could be conflating [music] my memory of it with other things. It's called The Big Hit. The Big Hit. What year was it?

[00:00:38]>> 98.

[00:00:38]>> 98.

[00:00:39]>> If I recall, it's very 1998.

[00:00:41]>> Okay. I'm here for that. I love it. And And you said it's got a really good soundtrack. Someone mentioned that the soundtrack is pretty much right up your [music] alley and they said Reel Big Fish especially and stuff like that. So, that's why That's why we're like, let's throw that to the top and see what's up.

[00:00:58]Cuz you know what? That's what we're all about that soundtrack. Yeah, I love It's my It's one of my favorite parts of the movie. I'm all about a good [music] soundtrack. So, that's what's up.

[00:01:09]>> That's what's up. All right, let's do this. Smash things with your clicker.

[00:01:13]Yeah, smash things with your clicker.

[00:01:15]Ear hole muffet. Y'all know what to do.

[00:01:18]You ready? I'm ready.

[00:01:20]46 19 27, go!

[00:01:24]>> [music] [singing] [music] [music] >> Thursday.

[00:01:46]>> A little present for you.

[00:01:48]Send me the book. Send me the knife. I just want my foot a little. Did you clean them? Look at Mark Wahlberg. He's going to be feeling the good vibrations here in a minute. Yeah. [music] Can you feel it, baby?

[00:02:02]Oh, that was the juice of people. It is people juice.

[00:02:07]>> Christina Applegate? Absolutely.

[00:02:11]Avery Brooks.

[00:02:13]Do I know who that is? You may.

[00:02:16]I saw Antonio Sabato Jr.

[00:02:19]The guy from the Janet Jackson video.

[00:02:22]Ross's dad? Jack Galler?

[00:02:25]I think so. Hey, baby. How you doing?

[00:02:28]Lela Rochon? You're constantly doing favors for your lame-ass co-workers. The way I see it, you're down at least 25 grand. Girl, your titties is hanging out.

[00:02:36]>> Yeah, baby. Your dress Your dress Is it supposed to be like that? I mean, I'm okay with it.

[00:02:45]Ew.

[00:02:47]Mhm. Oh. He's kind of cute. Who is that?

[00:02:50]Oh, that's Sammy the Knife. That's one of Costanza's crew. That [ __ ] turns me off. Look, Vince is going to be here on Saturday to pick >> [laughter] >> He's got to adjust his boner.

[00:03:04]>> [music] >> Oh, me, too. I need a punch a bag.

[00:03:09]>> [music] >> I know this song. I know it. I know it.

[00:03:15]>> [music] >> Stick 'em up, punk. It's fun-loving criminals. Oh, you, though.

[00:03:21]Bust a move, man. We're going to be late. I don't need to see Richie Valens' butt, either.

[00:03:26]>> [laughter] >> Want to put the final payment down on a Grand National. Just sail that baby around the world. Marky Mark should not have red hair. I was going to say, is it red? It's It's like a >> strawberry blonde. It's All right, gentlemen, synchronize.

[00:03:43]Oh, like a bunch of superheroes.

[00:03:45]>> [music] >> I had sunglasses like those. I think everybody had sunglasses like those.

[00:03:51]Oakley, like eye. He looks like he's about to start beating his chest like he DID IN FEAR. [laughter] >> [music] >> SO, THEY'RE HIT MEN.

[00:04:10]THEY'RE FLYING BACKWARDS. YEAH.

[00:04:16]>> [music] >> All I can think of with the night vision goggles is better yet, we got them when we're 40.

[00:04:22]>> [laughter] [laughter] [screaming] >> Break dancing. Yeah.

[00:04:35]And there just happens to be glass right in the middle of the room for them to yeet themselves through.

[00:04:42]Hold them back for you, man.

[00:04:44]>> SURE YOU ARE.

[00:04:47]OH.

[00:04:51]OH.

[00:04:53]HE WAS PLAYING.

[00:04:55]I'M really sorry about the mess. Sure you are. Say hello to your mother for me.

[00:05:01]So, that that [laughter] was the voice.

[00:05:04]Say hi to your mother for me, all right?

[00:05:06]Hey, you got a number for me? 911.

[00:05:07][music] Mom, fellas, we got to go. Damn lesbo.

[00:05:12]Come on, COME ON.

[00:05:13]>> [laughter] >> BUNGEE JUMP OF DUDE.

[00:05:19]>> YEAH.

[00:05:21]OH.

[00:05:22]>> [laughter] >> OKAY.

[00:05:33]WHERE WAS THE SKATEBOARD? COME OUT HERE AND protect me. I'm paying YOU, DON'T ACT SPLENDID FROM DEATH.

[00:05:39]>> [laughter] >> BASTARD.

[00:05:49]>> [music] >> YO, CISCO VINCE CLORTHO, YOU GOT TO GET OUT OF HERE NOW.

[00:06:01]WHAT?

[00:06:06]>> [laughter] >> SO STUPID.

[00:06:09]IT WORKED. It worked. Okay, Mel.

[00:06:12]Everyone looks at me. Those guys didn't do anything. Here's your bonus. That's Avery Brooks. Oh, Mel got the bonus?

[00:06:20]What? Hey, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo.

[00:06:23]Vince, the guy was still alive, huh?

[00:06:25]Extremely alive.

[00:06:28]I'm the one who clipped him. Yo, I don't think so. I think the guy was dead, man.

[00:06:32]You know, I'm wrong and you're right.

[00:06:34]I'm just lying through my teeth over here. I'm just trying to beat you out of your hard-earned bonus. If you say that you're the one who clipped him, who might I say you didn't?

[00:06:45]Hey, don't think I don't appreciate that [ __ ] baby. I don't like him in this movie. I mean, I get it. I'm not supposed to, but I don't.

[00:06:53]>> [music] >> Wrong house again, [ __ ] >> [laughter] [music] >> Love it.

[00:07:05]Hello?

[00:07:06]Melvin Smiley, please. Mr. Smiley, Big Top Video.

[00:07:10]>> We're going to inform you that you had our copy of King Kong Lives out for over two weeks now. Return it immediately or we will have you killed.

[00:07:20]I don't I don't think that's that's true.

[00:07:23]Is this turning you on? Uh-huh, like a light switch. How many women does he have? He had the other girl, now he's got her. You got to break this gently to my parents, Mel. What do you mean? How much Maalox do you need?

[00:07:37]>> [laughter] >> Better go get an endoscopy. Have that [ __ ] checked out. Honey, honey, it's going to be fine, okay? Listen, they are going to love you. Are you still having problems with your stomach? Yeah. I told you about all that spicy food, Melvin.

[00:07:51]>> Yeah, huh? Not just that. Well, I decided to take the $50,000 that we had left in our savings account and I lent IT TO DAD.

[00:08:00]OH, GOD. Be fine until they get back on their feet, huh?

[00:08:04]Oh. We already got 50,000 out of this clown already. [music] He thinks I'm paying my bills, huh?

[00:08:10]What? You're not paying your bills, baby?

[00:08:13]What?

[00:08:13]>> [screaming] >> Let his [ __ ] [music] fiance pay him up.

[00:08:18]Oh, [ __ ] You all right there?

[00:08:21]>> [sighs and panting] >> Yeah, thank god I don't sleep like that.

[00:08:26]>> Wake up next to a monster. Mhm. All my life, I wanted to make a movie, a big Hollywood movie. I understand Gerald, Taste the Golden Spray was a big movie.

[00:08:37]It was a huge movie.

[00:08:38]>> What? What's the name OF THAT MOVIE?

[00:08:41]>> [laughter] >> I KNOW GERALD, THE GOLD LEAF posters [laughter] for everybody, THAT WAS EXCESSIVE.

[00:08:57]>> [laughter] >> EW.

[00:09:03]I MEAN, IF THAT'S YOUR KINK, have at it, but you know what? That's gross.

[00:09:08]Yo, coach, what's up, man? Can you hook me with 25 G's till we do this one?

[00:09:12]You need it for that shill out [ __ ] again, don't you? Get with the program, Mel. Straight jackin saves you that mad cream.

[00:09:23]Straight jackin.

[00:09:25]>> [laughter] >> Just jack off, you're way better off.

[00:09:30][ __ ] both them [ __ ] If they running through that much [ __ ] I say dump both they asses. How the [ __ ] come you can't dump these two whack-ass, money-grubbing, no respect-giving [ __ ] >> Yeah, I want the truth.

[00:09:42]>> You can't handle truth.

[00:09:44]>> SHUT THE [ __ ] UP.

[00:09:45]>> [laughter] >> HE WANTS YOU TO BREAK UP WITH BOTH OF THEM. I mean, the idea of those two women not liking me is more than I can stand. I can't stand the idea of anybody not liking me, okay? Well, there's your problem. Yeah?

[00:09:58]You're a people pleaser. You're hell.

[00:10:00]Yep. Yep. You need to give zero [ __ ] >> Yeah. The 100 or so people you murdered in the past 5 years more than likely have relatives who don't think too highly of you.

[00:10:11]Yeah.

[00:10:12]Just saying. CAR TROUBLE?

[00:10:14]HELP!

[00:10:15]OH, [ __ ] THERE YOU GO.

[00:10:18]THIS is the girl?

[00:10:20]>> [music] [laughter] >> Lance!

[00:10:24]You're so nasty.

[00:10:27]Is that a high school? A prep school?

[00:10:30]Yeah, private school.

[00:10:33]Uh, actually, sorry. I'm taking this after that off. You can get a ride from somebody else. Don't worry about me.

[00:10:38]Drive the car. That's what you're paid to do. And don't forget my suitcase. Oh, you're going to get it.

[00:10:45]Careful with that case, bro. There's a piece of fragile crystal in there. You break it, you'll be back driving cabs.

[00:10:52]Oh, punk-ass kid.

[00:10:54]Lance, no.

[00:10:56]No, come on. No means yes.

[00:10:58]Come on, baby. Come on, YOU WANT IT.

[00:11:00]STOP!

[00:11:02][ __ ] [music] SUCKY, ME love you long time. Wow. STOP IT, NOW!

[00:11:07]WHAT'S UP WITH THAT, BRO?

[00:11:10]>> [laughter] >> UM, I'M REALLY SORRY ABOUT YOUR BOYFRIEND back there. He was just being kind of rude. Do you mind? I mean, he's got a point. He was being very rude.

[00:11:21]Okay, I guess I can figure this out.

[00:11:23]This is a kidnapping, right? That's right. So, what's up with you guys?

[00:11:26]You're supposed to be the Spice Boys or something?

[00:11:29]>> [laughter] >> Father, I've been abducted. am fine.

[00:11:33]>> Abducted?

[00:11:35]It says abduct. Just say abducted. I've been abducted. If you do not pay the son of 1 million dollars >> Wait a minute. Son of 1 million dollars what the >> it says. Means I don't know what it means. You told me to read this. That's what I'm doing.

[00:11:49]>> what it means. Me. Excuse me. With that one. It's Lance's crystal. It's really fragile.

[00:11:55]Lance is dead, bro. Like He shot him. He doesn't give a [ __ ] about the crystal right now.

[00:12:00]>> And you're worried about his crystal.

[00:12:01]Who wrote this?

[00:12:03]I DID. CRUNCH? WHAT? YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD be better? Is if instead of Lou Diamond Phillips, we had John Leguizamo.

[00:12:10]Oh, improv. What are you? Meryl [ __ ] Streep? Okay, improv the note. These sexually frustrated degenerate losers mean business. Don't don't Don't improv it. DON'T IMPROV THE NOTE.

[00:12:23]>> [laughter] >> DAD BEEN KIDNAPPED. SEND 1 MILLION OR I'M DEAD. PERFECT. So Chantal is cool.

[00:12:32]You take home girl here, you know, and put her in storage at your place. Cuz why? Cuz that's the best plan right now.

[00:12:37]You don't just do what I say, Melvin.

[00:12:39]Okay, first of all, his name is Melvin.

[00:12:41]What?

[00:12:42]Mark and Mark's name is Melvin in this.

[00:12:45]I am Mark.

[00:12:47]Yep, Jack Geller. I need A DRINK.

[00:12:50]>> NO.

[00:12:51]>> [laughter] >> HE'S A REGULAR SEX MACHINE.

[00:12:57]EW. YEAH. You don't want to hear that about your parents. So, where is our benefactor?

[00:13:04]King Kong lives.

[00:13:06]>> [laughter] >> He found his temp. He found his temp.

[00:13:11]Chantal wasn't able to >> Melvin, I am really starting to dislike you. I didn't find my money. That Crunch is. I'm going to call him up and pick up the money. I'll get it for you tonight.

[00:13:21]Now.

[00:13:25]Your money, you ready? That is Apache.

[00:13:27]It is. Sugarhill Gang. Mhm. It's going to keep that [ __ ] from uh tracing our [ __ ] You know what I'm saying?

[00:13:37]Ask this trace buster buster. See, when a [ __ ] try to bust your trace with a trace buster, this [ __ ] is going to bust the [ __ ] trace buster that's busting your uh trace. That's my word, playa.

[00:13:51]Okay.

[00:13:53]That's my word, playa. All right. Plug and play.

[00:13:57]>> That old Sony. My god, the cell phones are amazing. These are like first gen.

[00:14:06]Oh, you guys just interrupted his sewer slide mission.

[00:14:10]He was doing a whole ritual and everything. Killed himself in front of the Golden Sprays show sign. It's the nichi.

[00:14:17]You don't know me, but I have something you may want. Okay, I [ __ ] love that shirt. It's a John Leguizamo shirt. I'm telling you.

[00:14:25]These sexually frustrated deep Hold on, all right? Just you know, just relax.

[00:14:30]You should have had it ready to go before you called, buddy.

[00:14:33]>> All right, now you listen to this.

[00:14:34]Hoof polish, hemorrhoid cream.

[00:14:37]>> [laughter] [laughter] >> THAT [ __ ] HAD THE NERVE TO HOP smart on my ass.

[00:14:47]>> Holy [ __ ] he's wearing like mariachi pants.

[00:14:49]>> It's a whole ass John Leguizamo outfit.

[00:14:52]>> [laughter] >> I'm telling you. I TELL YOU.

[00:14:56]PHONE'S GOING TO RING AGAIN.

[00:14:58]YEP.

[00:14:59]>> [laughter] >> Your soup of sides mission is so doomed.

[00:15:05]It's not going to happen. WHAT?

[00:15:08]WHAT? WHY DID YOU NOT GET IT READY?

[00:15:11]HAVE YOUR DAUGHTER. WE WANT A MILLION dollars or she dies. Plain and simple.

[00:15:15]Oh, and don't try to trace this car cuz it won't do you no good. He's got a trace thing, TOO. YEAH.

[00:15:20]>> [laughter] >> WE ABOUT TO GET PAID. I TRACE YOU, BASTARD.

[00:15:25]>> [laughter] >> HELLO.

[00:15:32]>> [music] >> Tell the [ __ ] to do [ __ ] till I GET BACK. ARE YOU BOTH OUT OF YOUR MINDS? SHE looks like Coffee Talk. Yeah.

[00:15:42]Like She's going to talk amongst yourselves.

[00:15:45]>> [laughter] >> Even Christina's hair is all big. I think this might be who he based I sit [laughter] on. He based it on his mother his wife's mother. Oh, really?

[00:15:54]>> Yeah. Well, this is her. You're prejudiced.

[00:15:58]Prejudiced?

[00:15:59]>> Yeah. If I want to marry Goiam, I'll marry Goiam. OVER MY DEAD BODY YOU WILL.

[00:16:03]IF I WANT TO, I'LL MARRY A black man.

[00:16:06]You shut your MOUTH, HUH? YOU SEE IT'S JUST GOOD LORD. I LOVE IT.

[00:16:13]It's the kind of [ __ ] I would do. Know that I would never try to marry her without your blessing.

[00:16:18]Melvin, could you get me a shot of that rum I saw in there? Yeah, sure.

[00:16:23]>> [music] >> Never give daddy something to drink, ever. Why? What's the matter? It's horrible.

[00:16:34]>> It's not so bad.

[00:16:35]>> It's not so bad.

[00:16:37]>> that's what he is.

[00:16:40]Uh-uh.

[00:16:43]You don't kid now, they're all little girl, dude.

[00:16:46]>> [laughter] >> What's going on? Sit down and shut up.

[00:16:49]For real.

[00:16:50]>> [laughter] >> Sit your ass down. Sit, baby. It's all about love.

[00:16:55]Maybe it's for you. What is I'm telling you, that part should have gone to John Leguizamo. The machine breaks down.

[00:17:04]You done [ __ ] up. Order must be restored in my house. There has been a transgression.

[00:17:12]An unauthorized [clears throat] kidnapping in my house. Who could be that stupid? You. The kidnappee happens to be my goddaughter. OH, [laughter] [ __ ] NO.

[00:17:26]I AM SEARCHING for a [ __ ] stupid enough to [ __ ] with me.

[00:17:34]He's right there in front of you.

[00:17:35]>> Yo, boss, what's this got to do with me?

[00:17:37]I want to know what you would do to that son of a jackal.

[00:17:42]Me?

[00:17:43]I BUST SOME CAPS.

[00:17:45]>> [laughter] >> GIVE THIS MAN A GOLD STAR. It is you.

[00:17:51]Caps are about to get busted, homie. It is you that I'm putting in charge of this whole operation. It is you who must GO FORTH AND BRING THESE [ __ ] to me.

[00:18:06]>> [laughter] >> Oh, [ __ ] I got you, boss. Oh, [ __ ] >> Oh, King Kong lifts.

[00:18:15]It's a terrible King Kong movie, by the way.

[00:18:18]Let's just take the money and go to LA where people like us belong. I love this movie.

[00:18:25]>> [laughter] >> Right after I dog it.

[00:18:28]An idiot says they love it. I love it.

[00:18:33]Save Ferris, I knew it.

[00:18:36]>> [music and singing] [music] >> They all are the same person. Goodbye, you [ __ ] ass [ __ ] I'm leaving this dude.

[00:18:48]>> [music] >> OH, HELL.

[00:18:51]I GOT IT. THEY BROUGHT THE KIDNAPPED GIRL OVER.

[00:18:54]>> YEAH.

[00:18:55]>> [laughter] >> Don't worry, baby. I know shortcuts. And nobody noticed that she was handcuffed and gagged.

[00:19:01]>> [laughter] [music] >> Oh, [laughter] [ __ ] >> [music] >> Don't look in there.

[00:19:16]>> No. Oh no, no, no, sweetie, you don't want to do this.

[00:19:18]What's in there? Work stuff. Yes, Cisco went hunting the other day and he bagged a deer. He gave it to me to me cuz he's a vegetarian, you know.

[00:19:25]>> That's gross, honey. Take it out to the garbage, please. I'll burn it.

[00:19:29]>> [music] >> Oh, [ __ ] Hey, honey. Oh, you don't want to go in there. You don't want to use this one.

[00:19:36]He just blew it up.

[00:19:37]>> Go in. It stinks.

[00:19:39]>> What? Oh.

[00:19:41]Oh, no.

[00:19:42]>> [sighs] >> Ew, a giant rat.

[00:19:52]How tall is Marky Mark? He looks like he's 5'3.

[00:19:59]>> [music] >> NOW I'M HEARING THINGS.

[00:20:06]>> [screaming] [laughter] >> HELLO. HELLO. UNDERSTANDABLY, you're avoiding us, sir. I think you know why we're calling. This guy, he is extra nerdy. Our little girl, why are you crying? Because I want to rent King Kong Lives. I'm sorry, but you can't rent that. I promise I'll bring IT BACK.

[00:20:31]>> [laughter] >> OH, GOD.

[00:20:37]DAD'S OVER THERE sipping on his prune juice.

[00:20:39]>> Yeah, he's having a great time.

[00:20:41]You are a pathetic LITTLE MAN. DAMN.

[00:20:46]OH, [ __ ] >> [music] >> [ __ ] YOU'RE BACK. YEAH, Daddy had to make a pit stop and I forgot my purse. Look, if you got a thing in the trunk, you better get it out. I will. Get it out of here.

[00:21:00]>> Okay. Let's go.

[00:21:01]>> I swear. Oh, [ __ ] I can do this.

[00:21:07]You shouldn't be doing this. Chase, let's go. Where the [ __ ] are you?

[00:21:11]I don't think you need to worry about that. Cool.

[00:21:14]Don't you call.

[00:21:15]Don't you [ __ ] call, you stupid [ __ ] >> [laughter] >> Chase Buster Buster Buster [ __ ] Chase Buster Buster Buster.

[00:21:25]>> [laughter] >> I'll pick the chick up and keep her here in my crib. Well, I got to stop by the office. So, give me about a hour and a half. Cool? Yeah, cool. Is he even just getting ready to jerk off? Probably.

[00:21:37]Yep.

[00:21:39]You ready to go? You ready to go? YOU READY TO >> [laughter] >> I'M GOING TO TAKE YOUR GAG OFF, BUT YOU GOT TO PROMISE NOT TO SCREAM. Say hi to your mother for me.

[00:21:49]>> [laughter] >> Hey dog, how's it going? I can't with his voice like [laughter] that. It's the [ __ ] voice.

[00:21:57]That's his nice marble voice.

[00:21:59]>> how he was talking to Reese Witherspoon in Fear.

[00:22:01]>> It is. Trying to Trying to Yeah, the sweet side.

[00:22:08]Is he going to break up with his fiance and go for this girl? I mean, she's in high school, right?

[00:22:17]She's got granny panties.

[00:22:21]Oh granny panties?

[00:22:24]>> [laughter] >> Wait. Wait.

[00:22:27]>> Wait. Wait. Granny panties?

[00:22:29]>> [clears throat] >> Oh my god.

[00:22:32]No. What? Granny panties? Listen Listen up, Monroevers. [laughter] But I'm engaged [music] to Pam. Wait, so Chantel is kind of your girlfriend, but you're engaged to this other girl, Pam?

[00:22:45]Yeah. Yeah. It's exactly. Want to tell me more?

[00:22:49]Let's go. I can do this. God, don't do it.

[00:22:50]>> No, don't do it. I can handle my business.

[00:22:54]Don't handle your business.

[00:22:57]The sweet side.

[00:22:57]>> think this is your business to handle.

[00:23:01]I see what you mean by it feels kind of like Very Bad Things.

[00:23:05]It's Yeah.

[00:23:06]>> Oh, it does have that kind of feel.

[00:23:11]>> [laughter] >> You dropped your smoke, dude.

[00:23:13]>> Shaniqua, noon today, $1 million cash in a plastic garbage [music] bag. Near the Abby Shelter on McBride Trail.

[00:23:21]What?

[00:23:22]No, no, no. Hang up. Hang up.

[00:23:24]>> What is a McBride Trail? What is a McBride Trail? It's a [ __ ] uh thing.

[00:23:33]Uh um um He knows who it is. Uh-huh.

[00:23:38]>> With a face. McBride Trail.

[00:23:43]I will drop money.

[00:23:45]Good.

[00:23:48]You done messed up, A-A-RON. YOU DONE MESSED UP, A-A-RON.

[00:23:53]GET IN.

[00:23:54]CHASE, COME ON.

[00:23:56]YOU REALLY CAN'T BLAME SHANTEL AND PAM FOR TAKING advantage of you. You let them take advantage of you. I just can't stand the idea of them not liking me anymore. To be perfectly honest, I can't stand the idea of anybody not liking me.

[00:24:07]That sounds pretty dysfunctional. Yeah.

[00:24:10]You might suffer from a borderline personality disorder, and you have codependency [music] issues, too. Very much codependency issues. You're whipped. Uh-huh. Look, you seem like a nice guy. You're not like the others.

[00:24:21]You have to do what's right for you.

[00:24:22]You're really smart, you know that?

[00:24:24]>> [music] >> You remember days like that where you just sat around watching MTV? Mhm.

[00:24:29]>> [laughter] >> And Chinese food? Sure do.

[00:24:32]It was A GOOD TIME.

[00:24:36]JESUS CHRIST.

[00:24:38]WHERE'S THE GIRL?

[00:24:39]SHE'S at the I've been sent here by my boss, Paris, whose goddaughter you all happen to be kidnapping. You better tell me Melvin.

[00:24:49]where the [ __ ] she is, and who the [ __ ] Melvin.

[00:24:52]is the insidious mastermind behind this plot. Melvin.

[00:24:55]Melvin?

[00:24:57]Oh my god. What a dick.

[00:25:00]Melvin Smiley is a mastermind behind this kidnapping.

[00:25:03]What a world. Shoot it up.

[00:25:05]I mean, the humanity. [laughter] The betrayal. He was like a brother to me, man.

[00:25:11]This movie is all about overacting.

[00:25:14]>> YEAH.

[00:25:15]>> [laughter] >> NOT ON THE COMIC BOOKS, MAN.

[00:25:26]THIS GUY IS GOING to die.

[00:25:29]He always dying to do something for me.

[00:25:31]What an [ __ ] Big time. Now, we going to find Melvin Smiley and we going to kill him. You have to use your hands and get in there and get messy.

[00:25:40]Now we have to glaze our LM4 white leg corn.

[00:25:43]You got to glaze what now?

[00:25:46]>> [music] >> Ew. Ew.

[00:25:50]Yeah, this is not sexy. Mhm.

[00:25:52]>> This is the opposite of gross.

[00:25:57]>> Ew, and you're shoving stuff up the chicken's butt. Ew. This is not hot.

[00:26:01]There is nothing what?

[00:26:05]>> [music] >> No. No.

[00:26:12]Damn, I'm sorry. Sorry about that. I'll clean it up for you, okay?

[00:26:16]Is all of that really necessary to wipe some sauce off of her leg? It's not.

[00:26:23]It really isn't.

[00:26:25]>> [music] >> IT'S JAIL BAIT, BRO.

[00:26:30]OH, DAMN.

[00:26:32]TAKE OFF.

[00:26:36]I'M SORRY.

[00:26:38]OH, [ __ ] YEAH, your chicken's on fire.

[00:26:41]Way to go. You tell him after eating.

[00:26:45]Better he should have a broken heart on a full stomach.

[00:26:48]What do you think? You think he's going to take the money back?

[00:26:52]So, the parents talked her into breaking up with him. I'm getting the [ __ ] out of the country, and you need to do the same now. Paris is planning a big hit.

[00:27:01]Oh, [ __ ] I said it should have some lanolin in it. Dude, let your hand TAKE A BREAK. [laughter] >> [laughter] >> THERE'S A HIT SQUAD COMING FOR YOUR ASS right now. They here, too. And here's your prune juice. Darling, leave the bottle. Leave the bottle.

[00:27:22]>> [laughter] >> Eight years has cost me over $200,000 in plastic surgery bills. Baba, you're pulling the [ __ ] camera.

[00:27:34]Oh my god, he's drunk, and now he's just spilling it.

[00:27:40]Martin, just sit down. You're drunk. A princess, my only child, degenerate, manipulative, gold digging leeches the world over, big to my [music] would-be son-in-law Melvin, who's very charming in a Rain Man KIND OF WAY.

[00:27:57]>> [laughter] [screaming] >> OH GOD.

[00:28:05]CARL, YOU NASTY MOTHER >> [laughter] >> BACKSTABBING [ __ ] WHO'S SUPPOSED TO BE FRIENDS.

[00:28:14]>> [laughter] >> HE BLOCKED HIM FROM PUKING ON HIM by throwing a pillow up there. Friends, I just need a little space right now. I still love you, BABY. LIAR.

[00:28:25]YEAH, JUST LIKE YOU LOVE CARL POPPA.

[00:28:30]YES. I'M SORRY ABOUT THE MEAL AND ALL.

[00:28:33]THANKS FOR BEING WORSE.

[00:28:35]>> [laughter] >> WE'RE RIGHT BACK WHERE WE STARTED, YOU [ __ ] idiot.

[00:28:41]SHE'S JUST A [ __ ] >> WHAT ARE THE ODDS?

[00:28:56]>> [laughter] >> AND THEY TOOK THE DAMN MOVIE, TOO.

[00:29:03]>> Was that King Kong WITH >> [ __ ] [ __ ] >> [screaming] >> GOOD LORD.

[00:29:11]>> [music] >> THAT WAS INTENSE.

[00:29:19]OH, DAMN.

[00:29:23]It's like a '92 or '3 Firebird.

[00:29:27]He's like, "Yep, I'll be taking this back."

[00:29:31]Oh my god, he's got a gun. [music] You were going to keep this, weren't you?

[00:29:35]He wanted it.

[00:29:38]You should be ashamed of yourself. YEAH.

[00:29:40]>> [laughter] >> BABY, CAN WE JUST TALK ABOUT THIS? NO.

[00:29:45]MELVIN, I love you. No, you don't.

[00:29:49]Oh, he made it out.

[00:29:54]>> [laughter] >> He put both of them out on the street and stole the car. So, what happens now?

[00:30:02]Well, I drop you off and you go home.

[00:30:04]No, I mean with us. WHAT HAPPENS WITH US?

[00:30:09]HE'S GOING TO GO RETURN THIS VIDEO.

[00:30:11]>> [laughter] >> LOOK, if you're going to be with me, there's certain things you need to understand. He's a loner, Dottie, a rebel. [laughter] Things you shouldn't understand.

[00:30:27]>> [music] >> That's jailbait.

[00:30:31]He always looks like he's going to suck somebody's face right off the skeleton.

[00:30:37]Yep.

[00:30:38]>> [laughter] >> Oh my god.

[00:30:39]>> Oh, [ __ ] Oh, [ __ ] Oh, [ __ ] Oh, [ __ ] That gold tooth. SOMEBODY'S ABOUT TO BITE SOMEBODY'S tongue off. Oh damn.

[00:30:48]They are They're both toothless and neck BROKEN NOW.

[00:30:51]>> YEP.

[00:30:53]OH [ __ ] YOU SHOULD HAVE YOU You took too too long to go in there and return that video. Oh [ __ ] It's safe.

[00:31:04]You forgot your suitcase full of money.

[00:31:07]That's one thing I would have made sure to grab.

[00:31:12]There just so happens to be a trail big enough to fit a car.

[00:31:16]Oh [ __ ] YOU DROPPED THE VIDEO.

[00:31:22]>> [laughter] >> OH MY GOD.

[00:31:35]>> [groaning] >> HOW'S MY PLAN WORKING?

[00:31:42]>> [groaning and screaming] >> ALL YOUR MONEY GOT BLOWN UP. We got the video tape. Yeah, cuz heaven forbid he get another phone call from that nerd.

[00:31:59]>> [laughter] >> I want to punch that guy right in the face. Uh-oh. Big Top Video.

[00:32:07]The most expensive standee in the history of motion picture marketing.

[00:32:12]Awesome.

[00:32:19]Wanted for video truancy.

[00:32:23]It's your [ __ ] tape back. Ah, let's see here. Ooh, late charges.

[00:32:30]Oh mama, what's this? Ooh, and he didn't rewind. Oh, that's going to cost you. I put up your high prices, your lousy selection, and your rude phone calls. Sorry about that. I just want to tell you one thing. What? I will never ever rent tapes from this store again, you snide little For real.

[00:32:49]I'mma finish what I started, [ __ ] >> hell in THE HELL [laughter] HOW?

[00:32:55]SURE.

[00:32:56]HE GOT AWAY, TOO. OKAY. Let's go, [ __ ] Let's work.

[00:33:04]>> [laughter] >> OH. [groaning and screaming] >> [panting and sighs] [laughter] [laughter] >> THIS MOVIE IS SO GREAT.

[00:33:24]THEY'VE GOT A LOT OF TROMA STUFF. Tromeo and Juliet, Kabuki Warrior, whatever the hell that thing is called. Mhm. Toxic Avenger 2. Well, ain't that a [ __ ] All I wanted to do >> [sighs] >> was to sail my boat, man. Navigate [clears throat] by the stars, see dolphins racing alongside, you know. Maybe even kill a few of them. You're not going to like that. I can't see it no more, man.

[00:33:46]You're there, man. You're there now.

[00:33:49]Right there on the deck.

[00:33:51]>> [gasps] >> You better hurry.

[00:33:57]It's about to go boom.

[00:33:59]>> [music] >> Don't tell me she just now got to the video store. Here you go, chump.

[00:34:10]>> [music] >> OH.

[00:34:18]>> [laughter] >> THEY'RE GOING TO MAKE a movie about your kidnapping.

[00:34:23]Yeah, and my dad's in LA right now finalizing the deal. This is such a story. Everything's back to normal.

[00:34:28]Anyway, my ride's here. I got I'm going Mark and Mark survived. How much you want to bet?

[00:34:33]>> to. Yeah. He's going to be driving the boat.

[00:34:35]>> No telling how. Ma'am, would you like to just get away from it all? Skipper?

[00:34:41]Oh, Antonio is back.

[00:34:48]Thanks a lot, Vince. Let's go. You got it, kid. You know your dad's movie display was really well made.

[00:34:56]>> [laughter] [music] >> Is she in high school or college? I'm confused.

[00:35:04]Huh? I think she's too young. This is I I'm telling you, I think she's jailbait.

[00:35:09]I mean, it's possible she could be, I guess, in a college where you have to wear a uniform, but I don't know if >> but I don't get that vibe. I get private school. Uh he's got what's-his-face's boat. Yep.

[00:35:22]All right. You have now seen the goofiest big hit. The big hit. That was goofy.

[00:35:29]>> goofy.

[00:35:30]It was fun. I don't know what I was expecting, but it was it was fun. I'm I'm not mad at it. He had way too many girlfriends in this movie. Too many. Too many.

[00:35:42]And yeah, I think you're right. I I I mean, I love Lou Diamond Phillips, but John Leguizamo, that was That that seemed like it >> stolen that role from him, or maybe he couldn't do it, and they were like it was his role.

[00:35:54]>> it did. It felt like Like that was a role John would play.

[00:35:57]>> Yeah. And be great in it. Yeah. Not Not that Lou Diamond Phillips was bad.

[00:36:02]>> No. But >> I prefer seeing him as a good guy, generally speaking.

[00:36:06]>> I do, too. I He's He's on my good buddies list, but not like a He's a great bad guy. Right. But he's not He wasn't bad as a bad guy. It just wasn't It wasn't It was out of character for him, let's say. It It just felt very much like it should have been John Leguizamo for me. Antonio Sabato didn't have much to do in it.

[00:36:23]>> No, not much.

[00:36:24]>> Bokeem had a lot of jerking off jokes, but that's about it.

[00:36:27]Had a lot of a lot of jerking off to do.

[00:36:29]The hair color choice on Mark was wrong.

[00:36:33]The music was good. Yeah, I do love the Save Ferris track that was in there.

[00:36:37]>> I was waiting for a Real Big Fish song to happen, but I guess there was none of those. Maybe they thought that Save Ferris was a Real Big Fish song.

[00:36:45]No, Save Ferris. Okay. Save Ferris, Monique Powell. I knew it instantly, but I waited until she started singing cuz I can tell the distinct difference. I mean, just in the opening of the song if it's Real Big Fish, Less Than Jake, Save Ferris, I can tell the difference in all of them. I knew that was Save Ferris, but I was like, "Let's just make sure. Let me hear a voice coming." Yep, Monique.

[00:37:08]Save Ferris. And I'm pretty sure that was a song that Save Ferris did in 10 Things Yeah, 10 Things I Hate About You cuz they were in that movie in the prom scene along with Letters to Cleo. I like it.

[00:37:22]This was fine. This was a good choice.

[00:37:24]Soundtrack was good. Uh and the name of that band at the beginning that we Fun Lovin' Criminal. Is Fun Lovin' Is Fun Lovin' Criminal. I saw that earlier when I was looking at soundtrack. So I didn't remember that.

[00:37:37]>> I didn't remember that, either.

[00:37:38]>> remember that like chorus of that song.

[00:37:40]Parts of it, but like it was it was there.

[00:37:42]>> But I didn't remember the name of the band being the same.

[00:37:45]>> I was thinking like Third Base or like They They're the ones who do Pop Goes the Weasel. Remember that song? I do.

[00:37:51]Pop Goes the Weasel, the Weasel.

[00:37:53]>> thinking it was them for some reason cuz And there was um Or what's his face, Whitey?

[00:37:57]Whitey Whitey Ford? Oh, Everlast.

[00:38:00]Everlast. I was thinking it might have been him, too. No, it was too poppy for that. Um Urban Dance Squad, that's who sings Deeper Shade of Soul. That was a good soundtrack, though.

[00:38:12]It really was. It was a fun movie. It was a lot funnier.

[00:38:17]But yes, had a I think the Big performances. Everyone Yeah, everybody was over the top. Um I think it's like you said, very kind of similar to Very Bad Things. Very Bad Things was hysterical, but a lot of crime. Unapologetic crime. Like these guys were just unapologetically chopping people up, you know, not it wasn't questioning any of it. It was just what they do. It's what they do.

[00:38:41]There you go. We did it. We watched a movie.

[00:38:43]We'll get back on track this weekend with filming. And I bet we are one of only nobody else that's done [laughter] this.

[00:38:51]>> [gasps] >> Well, then that tracks for us. Go team.

[00:38:56]Keep it weird. Yeah. All right, guys.

[00:38:59]We'll see you next time. Don't forget to click and smash the stuff down below, okay? Don't forget about Patreon, too.

[00:39:04]We'll see you later.

[00:39:05]>> Bowie.

[00:39:07]Oh, he almost did. No. He did move. He's ready to go outside to go potty. All right.

[00:39:12]All right. Bye, guys.

[00:39:18]>> [music] [music] [music] [music] >> I'm not gay no more. I AM DELIVERED. YOU sure about [music] that? Typical of you, Rachel Green. Queen Rachel does whatever she wants in the little Rachel land.

[00:40:09]>> [music] >> They all ADHD. Buckle up, nerds. This town has never seen When they [music] brought you in here and booked you, you was crying like a [ __ ] Yeah.