RV Life Wasn't a Dream — It Was the Only Door Left Open After Losing Everything

Added: 2026-05-05

[00:00:02]This is going to be a tough video to make because um of the circumstances, but um after my last video, a lot of people were talking about sticks and bricks and how they wouldn't get into an RV, but for me, I don't think it was an option.

[00:00:21]If you're willing to sit back a little bit, I'll tell you my story. It's pretty sad.

[00:00:26]But uh I want to get it out there partially because I want my kids to know my perspective of what happened.

[00:00:36]And uh you know, you can be along for the ride.

[00:00:41]Well, here's the situation.

[00:00:45]I owned a house you know, about 50 years ago.

[00:00:50]And uh I was I was young and I I had a house and had a wife and whole nine yards and about 35 years ago 40 years ago um I got divorced.

[00:01:10]She found somebody else that she liked better.

[00:01:13]And she got the house.

[00:01:15]She got most of the money.

[00:01:18]She got a huge uh child support that uh it was very very I mean, paying that child support, I knew it was going for my kids, so it was worth it, but boy, it broke me. It really I lived in poverty for a long time.

[00:01:36]And then I found my lady.

[00:01:41]And I I'll be I'll admit I had no idea how somebody as wonderful as her could like a mutt like me.

[00:01:50]So uh I treated her like an angel.

[00:01:55]Which she was.

[00:01:57]And uh We lived in Indiana. We lived in a couple places and we eventually settled here in Southern California in San Diego.

[00:02:10]And uh we when we got here, we were looking at a house, but you couldn't.

[00:02:17]Not on our income. We couldn't afford a house in to buy a house in Southern California.

[00:02:23]So we rented.

[00:02:25]And it wasn't that bad because, you know, every couple years we'd move to the better location.

[00:02:32]So, you know, we kept moving up in the in the rental community and finding nicer houses and apartments and all of that and we didn't mind.

[00:02:43]And then um in 2022 we discovered she has lung cancer.

[00:02:55]At the same time I discovered I've got prostate cancer.

[00:03:00]And it terrified our kids because they thought they were going to lose two parents.

[00:03:05]And we both battled. My prostate My If you know what a PSA was uh mine was 52, so that gives you an idea how bad my prostate cancer was.

[00:03:16]I eventually had my prostate removed.

[00:03:19]And uh she battled her It was stage four lung cancer and uh they we tried everything.

[00:03:29]We battled and battled and she battled.

[00:03:32]And uh she was beating it. She was actually beating it.

[00:03:39]And it was draining our savings.

[00:03:42]It was draining our retirement.

[00:03:46]We were even starting to put things on credit cards because the oncologist said that in order for her to really get over this, we have to try things that were leading edge that insurance wouldn't pay for, so we even tried those things and the oncologist said uh everything was going great right up to the point where it wasn't.

[00:04:14]She woke up one morning and she was absolutely gray.

[00:04:18]And we found out that uh the last round of chemo or something in her system had had had killed all her blood cells and they'd all just formed clots all over her body.

[00:04:31]So she went in for a blood transfusion and uh this is the part that to this day doesn't make any sense to me, but uh she went in for her blood transfusion and they said it would take 90 days for her own blood to repopulate her body.

[00:04:49]And that we need to keep her away from people with colds or flus or anything like that because she had an immune uh compromised immune system.

[00:04:58]And and I was like I couldn't didn't make any sense. I'm like, she's got this crazy lung cancer just just chewing away and now she has no immune system to battle that. I mean, it makes no sense at all.

[00:05:13]To me that uh they stopped all her treatments waiting for her blood to come back.

[00:05:19]And uh what happened was um you know, when they said, "All right, we can start treatments again." She one of the first things she did was she went in to get her lungs drained and they dumped out like a What was it? A liter and a half of fluid and then they took an X-ray and that X-ray you know, the the the earlier X-ray showed a couple white spots, which was the cancer and you know, 90% of her lungs were black.

[00:05:49]Well, after 3 months I'd say 94% of her lungs were white and only you know, 6% were black and that just the the person looking the doctor looking at the X-ray was just shaking his head no and he knew and I knew, but you know, we didn't tell her because you know, we gave her hope.

[00:06:13]It was false hope, but at least we gave her hope.

[00:06:16]And uh eventually she had to be on so much oxygen that portable oxygen at home wouldn't work, so she had to be in the hospital.

[00:06:27]>> [clears throat] >> And uh >> [snorts] >> they brought in a palliative care person and you know, if you know what palliative care is, it's end of life care. So uh you know, it was it was rough because the things that they gave her, they gave her like a bunch of blood thinners and that released all the clots.

[00:06:50]And in her last like week of life, she had TI TIAs transient ischemic arrhythmias or what it was was basically she had these mini strokes and her eyes would point in different directions. She'd lose the ability to speak.

[00:07:07]She couldn't talk right. She'd lose the ability to use her arms. Her mental faculties were just starting to go crazy and it just it was something no nobody would want to watch.

[00:07:21]And I remember one day doctor team came in and said, you know, she's got pressure on her heart. She's got a lot of fluid around her heart.

[00:07:31]And we want to get an okay to go see about, you know, doing some heart surgery to relieve that pressure.

[00:07:40]And it was a $200,000 operation.

[00:07:43]And they said at the most it would buy her a day or two.

[00:07:52]It just it just, you know, I shook my head and I was like, you know, she's only got a day or two left.

[00:07:59]And I know having a surgery like that, she wouldn't be coherent after surgery. I'd rather have her you know, somewhat coherent and not going through more pain.

[00:08:11]So I said no.

[00:08:13]And uh it was hard.

[00:08:16]It's hard to watch somebody suffocate to death.

[00:08:21]And uh you know, to to go in a hospital after seeing that no, I I I'd rather And that's why I say, you know, I want to be in my chair in my RV and and just kind of watch the sunset go cuz I've got enough going on with me physically that if if I wanted to, it wouldn't be a hard effort to to bring the end of life.

[00:08:53]But I wanted my kids to know that you know, how I saw things cuz you know, even though we were all there, I was there for every visit, every appointment, every everything.

[00:09:06]And I've got a different perspective on things that than they do.

[00:09:11]And you know, we spent all the money we had. We even spent money we didn't have.

[00:09:18]We maxed out credit cards and thank God that we had separate finances. She had her cards, I had my cards, she had her banks, I had my banks.

[00:09:31]So that uh when she passed um the credit cards just, you know, defaulted all her uh debts and uh I checked in you know, af- after she passed I looked at what it would cost to be in a nursing home or retirement center in San Diego and it cost more than the rent I was paying for the apartment and that rent was $4,000 a month at the time of her passing, and that paid for no utilities, no trash pickup, nothing in addition.

[00:10:05]And that was ridiculous.

[00:10:07]And uh I checked the retirement centers and nursing homes, and they they were um ridiculous, and the state-funded ones had a had a backlog of, you know, multiple years. You couldn't get in.

[00:10:22]You know, you you're on a waitlist to get into a retirement center. Uh if you want to know something crazy, one of the people I worked on as a massage therapist was in White Sands Retirement Center in La Jolla, California.

[00:10:35]She had to pay $900,000 to get in as a retainer.

[00:10:40]And her place cost 15,000 a month.

[00:10:45]But that got her medical and everything, but $15,000 a month with a $9,000 you know, retainer.

[00:10:53]And uh It's an interesting place cuz you start on the left side in independent living.

[00:11:00]The middle block of buildings is assisted living, and the right set of blocks is kind of uh hospital {slash} um hospice living. And then the very far on the right was the uh mortuary.

[00:11:17]So, as she put it, you come in on the left, and then you slowly move your way through the right, and they take you out in a in a in a casket. I was like, "Wow.

[00:11:27]This is what you This is what you call living? I'm taking my chances in an RV before I do that."

[00:11:33]Um So, for me, sticks and bricks would have been wonderful.

[00:11:39]Um I didn't want my children to have to pay for my retirement and my old age.

[00:11:46]So, I I I I bought an RV for My RV cost me $2,000, and it's not worth a penny more, I don't think.

[00:11:54]So, uh there's always something that I need to do to fix it. And that's why I call it a no-season RV.

[00:12:01]Um When it's cold, it's cold, and when it's hot, it's hot.

[00:12:05]But it's mine, and uh you know, I I I just wanted some of you out there to know that uh there are those of us out there, these nomads that are in their 60s and 70s that have lost a spouse, and uh weren't financially set to live an independent life in uh sticks and bricks.

[00:12:32]And uh we're the nomads out there that are not really welcomed into a lot of RV parks.

[00:12:40]We're living in SUVs, we're living in vans that are, you know, old vans and beat-up RVs, but you know, we wake up with a smile, and we go on with life, and we try not to get in anybody's way, and and we live a simple life, and that's just kind of you know, how it is for us, and um Uh those of There's going to be some of you out there that really understand this cuz you're in the same situation.

[00:13:13]And uh those of you who aren't, understand that uh man, sticks and bricks sounds pretty good, but uh the way things just went with me with spending every nickel beyond every nickel that I had to keep my wife um alive, and it didn't work.

[00:13:34]Um that's what got me into an RV.

[00:13:37]And uh I talk to her every day, and I'm hoping that uh my living the RV life, she always wanted to travel. She always wanted to see the country.

[00:13:51]And I hope that uh somehow she's seen it through my eyes and through my experiences.

[00:13:58]And I do I talk to her every day, and I miss her very much, and uh just wanted you guys to know what my story was.

[00:14:06]Sorry it wasn't uh you know, unicorns and rainbows, but uh thanks for watching, and I'll keep posting, and as long as you keep watching. Thanks.

[00:14:17]Bye.