How Men Really Fall In Love (Understanding The Male Brain In Love)

Added: 2026-05-12

[00:00:00]Have you ever wondered what actually goes on a man's brain when he falls in love? Not the toxic Bronx mode of session, not the lust-filled passion.

[00:00:10]Follow Alex, who used to be toxic and now I'm reformed, >> [laughter] >> is talking about the kind of love that grows deeper over time and creates real emotional ties. Most dating coaches on YouTube, including myself, missed the science behind why men bond emotionally.

[00:00:30]In this video, though, I'm going to make up for it. I'm going to I'm going to break down the three key ways men fall in love and the powerful hormones behind it, like vasopressin and oxytocin.

[00:00:43]By the end of the video, you'll understand how to naturally trigger long-term attachment in a man without going straight to hell and without manipulation. Let's begin with the video, people, okay? And by the way, today we're uploading our first video or second video. Um it's about resentment.

[00:01:00]We're going to be uploading it in about 3 hours. It's already uploading, people, so the ones who purchased the Course in Commitment Formula, I did not scam you guys. It just took It took Follow Alex a few months to just come up with the content and all that kind of stuff, but we're I'm so excited. And in 2 weeks, I'm going to be re-uploading the second part of the course, okay? So we're we're finally getting some momentum, okay?

[00:01:20]Now, look, the first the first thing that you have to understand is how men fall in love in a in a in a masculine way, okay? How men fall in love with each other, okay? And that's through vasopressin, okay? Vasopressin is is the the the the the bonding hormone that makes Jesus Christ. It's the bonding hormone.

[00:01:39]See, they're bonding there. It's but not through vasopressin, I can promise you that. It's the bonding hormone that men experience when they have when they go through challenges together. Like, for example, athletes. When athletes build a bond together and they've been through a lot of games and won a lot of games and lost a lot. I feel like you're part of my team, right? It's what makes a guy want to defend you, right? It's It's what makes a guy say, "Okay, you know what? This girl This girl is like a friend to me, right?" It's what gives him It's what makes him say she's like a friend. She's like my best friend. So, if you If you're If If you're the type of woman that makes a guy fall in love with that, it doesn't feel like a deep friendship, but you're you might be lacking vasopressin. In fact, this is what men use to bond with their people or their children, right? Mommy is like, "Oh, how my god. How are you feeling?

[00:02:26]Let me touch you. Let me Can I Can I caress you?" And boys and boys and their dads are like, "Let's run together, right? Let's play video games together.

[00:02:32]Let's solve a puzzle together, right?

[00:02:34]Let me prank you. Let's prank Mommy, right?" Be- Being in a team or like, "Don't tell Mommy that we did this, right? Don't tell Mommy that I I that you saw me with another girl."

[00:02:43]Right? That bo- that team bonding type of feeling is through vasopressin, and a lot of women miss out on that. It promotes a man's protective behavior with you, right? It promotes a man's commitment for you. It makes him want to fight for you. In fact, it's perfect if the guy is an avoidant, okay? Now, this one is is actually not that It's not that difficult to create. You just have to view You just have to see this from a man's point of view, and I'm going to show you towards the end of the video how to do this. And if you want the longer video, I uploaded the a 40-minute version of this video on Mindful Attraction For Real, so go check it out under the description down below. The next way is the feminine way of seducing a guy, and you actually need to do this, okay? And this is where you have a lot of masculine women who are who are really successful that make that have a lot of guys into them, but for some reason the guys don't stay long-term. It's because they lack the vas- they lack the oxytocin. Oxytocin is pretty much um what heals attachment wounds. Um it's all about relaxation rather than teamwork, so it's not about vasopressin, right? Um it's what It's what allows a guy to bond with you. It's what increases trust and empathy. Um and in fact, higher levels of this in early on in the relationship is what predicts a long-term commitment in a guy. In fact, this is what makes a guy not want to cheat on you.

[00:04:00]It's the fact that I have such a deep bond with this woman, I feel so connected, I feel so relaxed around her, I am not going to trade her for bimbo dot blog.

[00:04:09]Okay? Um, and I'm going to show you how to do this because this is actually pretty easy to do. You just have to make sure one thing. You got to have lower cortisol level, okay? You can't be projecting.

[00:04:18]All right? So, if you have high cortisol levels, um, if you have a lot of high stress, this is very difficult to do.

[00:04:24]So, how do you do this, right? Well, you got to have some activities that release it, okay? But, the the first thing you got to realize is that you you you can't release tho- tho- those um, those those hormones without having boring time together. And boring time is routines, things you do everyday consistently or every week, right? So, that means you got to have some consistency. And consistency sometimes leads to boredom, right? It could be walking the dog together, right? It could be watching TV or every Friday you guys watch a movie.

[00:04:50]Every Friday you guys cook together.

[00:04:52]Rather than going out to get dinner, you guys cook together. The point is that you've got to have time spent together in a very simple way, right? Not without high dopamine because if you have too much dopamine, it's not going to work out that way. So, what are some activities that you guys can do to increase this? Well, guess what? Solving problems together. It could be that maybe he wants to lose weight. It could be that maybe he wants to cut um, stop smoking cigarettes and you guys work out a plan about how to stop smoking cigarettes, right? Um, it could be that anything that's solving a problem, right? Um, learning new skills together, right? Learning maybe volleyball together, being part of a volleyball team. Cooking rather than going out to cook, right? Ra- rather than going to get dinner, you guys cook together, right? Share travel, traveling together and having newer experiences, right? Teaming up in a competitive activity, right? It could be that maybe you guys join a a a volleyball group. I remember, I went to I I went I went to play volleyball the other day. My lord, that's fun. Holy [ __ ] Guys were high-fiving each other. It was like a co-ed volleyball group. And if I take a girl out with me and I take her on a date to play volleyball, that's a perfect way to bond with her.

[00:05:58]Right? That's a perfect way to bond.

[00:06:00]Overcoming challenges together, right?

[00:06:03]Fixing things in the house, right?

[00:06:04]Repairing it. And the thing is this is that this requires cooperation and it requires no bronze more energy, meaning you guys have to know how to solve problems together without getting to without fighting without getting proximal, pretty much, right? Um if you guys can't bond through vasopressin, there's too much cortisol. There's too much defensiveness, right? And you guys have to talk it out. But the vasopressin, those activities, maybe going hiking together, any challenge. It could be that maybe you guys are doing a 30-day meditation challenge, right? Or maybe today you're going to do it like for example with this girl I used to date, we we we we would meditate together, right? Or another girl where we used to um she would actually help me with my meditation groups, right? That thing, right? Or maybe post flyers out together. She I'd be like, "Hey, I'm I'm I'm going to post flyers. Can you help me out?" And we would go out me and her go out and post flyers. The point is doing things together that are difficult and overcoming those challenges increases the vasopressin. You guys high-five each other, right? And that high-five after doing something difficult increases the bond.

[00:07:01]The next one is how do you how do you do with oxytocin? Well, you got to think about it as a child it how it how a mother um makes her creepy little kid fall in love. How do you do that? Well, non-sexual touches. Right? Cuz people are [ __ ] There's They're noisy here. Non-sexual touches, right? Skin-to-skin, right? So it could be like just caressing the face, right?

[00:07:23]Or even daily massages. You you massage his neck. He massages your neck, right?

[00:07:27]You guys um interchange in that. Or maybe you guys are watching TV together.

[00:07:31]You guys holding hands or maybe just slowly caressing each other's hand while you're watching something. The point is is that you it can't I want it to be non-sexual, okay? Um it could be doing nothing.

[00:07:43]Just doing nothing. Just doing watching TV and just spending boring time together, right? Eye contact does this, okay? Um um laughing together, going to a comedy show and laughing together, or just having so much chemistry that you guys laugh together by accident. Um eating together and cooking to Eating together is very important, right? You guys have a night out and you guys bond through eating. Um deep conversations, so that could be that maybe you guys have conflict and you guys are having problems and you guys talk it out. Or maybe you guys have weekly check-ups.

[00:08:12]Hey, how was the How was How was this week? Was there something that I did wrong? You know, the the the Was there something a resentment that you have? Like having those weekly talks and and talking about inner resentments is very important.

[00:08:25]Um and these things, especially I'll be honest with you, you just want to think about how a mother makes a a child fall in love. She cooks for him.

[00:08:33]She pays attention. When he goes to school, she makes sure to pack his favorite food and the creepy little kid is like, "Oh my god, Mommy loves me. She packed us all my [ __ ] Skittles."

[00:08:43]Right?

[00:08:44]By the way, I like kids, okay? I'm not evil, okay? Um That That's all you got to think about.

[00:08:49]How would you create How would you create a bond with your child? It's literally how you do it.

[00:08:54]When you When When he goes to sleep, can you relax him? Maybe he's stressed and you relax him. The point is is is getting is relaxing him. Um because if you can't relax him, you might You guys might be releasing oxytocin. You guys might be touching him, but it he tenses up.

[00:09:10]He tenses up.

[00:09:12]Okay? Um and this is how you do it. If If you don't have this, if you don't have this, it's it's it's They're not They're not going to fall in love.

[00:09:20]They're not going to fall in love.

[00:09:33]And above all, spending Once you do this and you spend boring time and you repeat this on a consistent basis, over time the love will rise. Again, you just I want you guys to not depend on excitement. I want you guys to not depend on intensity and just depend on simplicity. Okay, you don't have to do spineroonies and double backflip somersaults to from space to the moon to here to make a girl love. That's just insecurity. Guys don't need that. Only toxic men need that. Anyways, man, let me know what you guys think about this.

[00:10:03]For one-on-one coaching, go to my [email protected].

[00:10:06]For the longer video, go watch my my YouTube channel, my info@attractionforreal.

[00:10:11]And don't forget we're having seminars in New York City. We we even have drawing events for free. Drawing, art, and meditation events. So, if you guys want to join the art meditation events, just go to my Instagram or go to the Alexis P or go to my art and my art Instagram, which is artistofnyc at Instagram and there you'll be able to join for free. Take care.