More S3XLESS Women Are Yearning For Physical Touch From Men But All The Men Have Walked Away

Hinzugefügt: 2026-05-12

[00:00:00]Do y'all know what it feels like to be touchdeprived?

[00:00:03]Like, I ain't trying to hunch. I ain't trying to do all that extra [ __ ] I just want to hug. I just want to melt in some big ass arms. I want my back rub. I want my feet rub. I want my body rub. Little kiss on the cheek, on the forehead or something. I'm likely to bark like a rabbit ass dog when next time a [ __ ] touch me. I DON'T KNOW.

[00:00:23]BARK. This is just a short intro because I just want to thank everyone for the support you've given to this channel for the past few weeks. Now, let's get back to the craziness.

[00:00:32]>> This is going to sound a little vulnerable, pathetic loser of me, but nobody really talks about how when you get out of relationships and you're just like single for a while, you really get touchdeprived. I don't even mean in like a sexual way, but just like simple [ __ ] like even getting like a hug. Like I just find myself yearning for Oh my god, so pathetic loser. But anyways, like I just find myself yearning for like a genuine hug from somebody that likes me.

[00:00:58]And no, I don't mean like from a friend.

[00:01:00]I don't want a friend hug. I don't want a hug from my dad. I mean like somebody who you like like and they like you back. And just like the innocence of it all and the physical touch aspect of it all. And again, I not the sexual thing.

[00:01:13]I'm sure if you like engage in sexual stuff even when you're not in relationships, you probably have no idea what this touch deprivation feels like.

[00:01:20]But when if you're like me and like you just don't do that stuff and you need a relationship, like wow, it does not like I just yesterday was like it got so bad.

[00:01:31]I was just laying in bed last night. I'm like nothing's making this feel better.

[00:01:34]Like I tried to like hug myself, wasn't working. Tried to hug a pillow, wasn't working. I literally was on Reddit like how to get rid of touch deprivation and people are like go to a massage, get like a pedicure done. I'm like that [ __ ] like it's it doesn't hit the way getting a hug from somebody you like hits.

[00:01:52]Anyways, on a new chapter of dealing [ __ ] I'm finding out as my first time being single touch deprivation sucks.

[00:02:00]Yeah. The hottest girls always have the worst love life and that's because we are always lusted over and not loved on.

[00:02:06]It is crazy to me that men will literally see you. They will see that you take care of yourself, that you exude this confidence. You have this amazing aura. You're somebody that not only takes care of your physical body, but you take care of your spirit, your energy, the way that you move in this world, the way that you dress, the way that you show up, and they will still literally take advantage of that. At one point, you start to question like, is there somebody that's going to see me beyond my looks? Is there somebody that's going to see me beyond of what I physically am?

[00:02:35]>> I'm so burnt out from work that even on the weekends, I do not feel like I am resting. And that's the thing. I take vacations. Like I have weekends off.

[00:02:45]It's not like I'm working like 24 hours a day or anything like that. Like I have my off time, but it's not a matter of like physical exhaustion. It's like mental exhaustion. So, even if I have like time off and I'm just like resting, I'm like at home or whatever, I still feel like I'm not resting. So, does anybody have any ideas for what to do about burnout? Because your girl is so burnt out that she is burnt to a crisp.

[00:03:12]Am I the only one who is so turned off on dating? Um, speaking to men at all, because I am a single mom of four. I have been through so much. I mean, if I tell you my story, we will never get off of this app. Same time, I still want to find love again. I still want to give love a chance. I still want to date, you know? I still want my person. But it's so hard for me right now to even go on a date with somebody like I don't know. Is anyone else feeling like just like a bit over it and a bit like I can't be bothered because I don't know what's in the air, but like Yeah. so sick of people saying just like love yourself more and then you'll find your person. And there used to be a time when I didn't love myself, but I do love myself now. And I'm sick of people saying like, "Go out and enjoy your life while you can." Well, I have enjoyed myself. I have enjoyed my life. And there has been times in my life where I didn't think I could do it on my own, but I have been doing it on my own. And I know I can do it on my own. And I don't need somebody else to show that I can. I don't need to prove to myself or anyone else that I can do it on my own.

[00:04:28]But I'm sick of doing it on my own. I want somebody to enjoy life beside. I want somebody else here, too. Not because I don't love myself enough. Not because I can't do it on my own. I just want somebody to share experiences with.

[00:04:43]I'm sick of doing it on my own.

[00:04:46]Is it that hard? Is it that much to ask for?

[00:04:52][ __ ] I'm just sick of doing it alone.

[00:05:01]I know I can. I know I love myself. I know that I can live on my own if I have to. I just don't want to anymore.

[00:05:11]I don't even care how ugly I look. I'm probably not even posting this.

[00:05:18]I'm just sick of it.

[00:05:21]moments spent with somebody are enjoyable. I want somebody I could share a joke with or share a memory with.

[00:05:28]Like, I've been doing it on my own and I just don't want to do it on my own anymore.

[00:05:35]How long do I have to prove that I can do it on my own?

[00:05:48]just want a partner I could share life with. Why is that so much to ask for and I'm spiraling and I'm almost on my period and I know that it's [ __ ] hormones cuz I have existential crisis every month, but I don't care. I just I'm crying on [ __ ] Tik Tok now. And what the [ __ ] is this life?

[00:06:15]So, we need to talk about going through a crisis alone. Not just feeling alone, although that's valid, but like actually going through something alone alone. So, this is for the single and child-free people who go through life's [ __ ] alone. And there's no one to automatically share the load and share the weight, the emotional, physical, financial weight of the crisis. Like, there's no built-in partnership, right?

[00:06:40]There's no one managing the logistics of all of this while your world falls apart. Like when a when a crisis happens, a catastrophe happens, like a medical diagnosis or a loved one is in the hospital or something like completely unplanned for and catastrophic, who was there to manage it for you besides you? You become the one sitting in the chair holding a loved one's hand, managing everything while your life still has to go on. Cuz when you leave and you go back home, everything is still waiting for you.

[00:07:12]Like there's no, "Hey babe, here's a cup of tea. How was your day? Don't worry, I took care of everything. The bills, the pets, the house, the responsibility, your job are still things that need tending to." And sure, if you don't have a partner who is emotionally supportive, or you are trying to juggle the struggles of parenting, that is also valid. But that's not who this is for.

[00:07:32]Okay? I am talking specifically to the people who are alone and carrying this alone. The emotional shock, the decisions, and the logistics while you're in [ __ ] survival mode. That's who I'm talking to. And I want to just take a minute because single and child-free people become incredibly resilient. And our bandwidth to handle life becomes so incredibly grand and powerful because guess what? We don't have a choice. We have to learn how to manage grief and crisis and keep our lives functioning every single day. And like always, we figure it out. It doesn't mean that it's not heavy. We just learn how to carry it. So, if you're in the middle of this and you're alone and you're carrying and managing a crisis, I see you. Big hugs, my friend.

[00:08:16]And if you do know someone who is alone and dealing with a crisis, step up. Do a little bit of the functioning for them.

[00:08:22]cuz even the strongest people and the most resilient people should never ever ever have to carry the weight of a crisis on their own. I don't know if it's because I've been on my own for about almost like 5 years now or what, but people be so in a rush to move out of the house and like be on their own.

[00:08:40]Don't get me wrong, it's cool and all of that. Like it has its perks. You don't have to walk in house and talk to nobody. You don't have nobody telling you what to do in your house. You can walk around your house the way you want to walk around your house. Me personally, I get loud on the phone.

[00:08:54]Like, I'm very expressive. I can be as loud as I want. That's what I like.

[00:08:57]Don't get me wrong. Living alone definitely have its perks. But like, it gets so lonely after a while. Especially when you just a young girl. I'm just a young girl. No dog, no nothing. I think maybe that's what it is. I think I need a dog. I get so lonely. I get so lonely to the point I make up things to do just to be outside of my house. Sometimes I get so lonely and I just want to get out the house to the point where I literally will just get in my car and go sit in a parking lot like not far from my house.

[00:09:29]I will go sit in the parking lot in my car just to feel like I'm outside somewhere or have something to do or something to look at. And then me like I'm not a TV person. Like I don't really watch movies and like TV and stuff like that. So yeah, like when I'm not working, I be so bored. Like I be so bored. I'll be trying to sit there and watch TV or whatever the case may be. Or I will just distract myself. I'll try to put some content together. That's one thing that I do love about like getting into content and everything. That is what really keeps my mind occupied like working on like videos and things like that cuz you'll be editing in the video for a cute hour. By the time you look up, it's time for you to get in the bed.

[00:10:12]Like I like that type of thing. So maybe I just need to find more things to keep me a little bit more occupied and busy on my free time. I'm typically not too too bored because I'm usually busy with work and stuff in my life. I typically I'm busy. But yeah, all in all, like living alone, it be cool and it be cute and all of that, but it's nothing like having a dog, something, and somebody to talk to sometimes. I knew I was destined to experience loneliness longterm when I decided to be child-free, not get married young, and step away from being male-centered. Not just loneliness in terms of like romantic companionship, but just lonely in general. Mainly because of the resentment that I've experienced from people around me because of the choices that I've made.

[00:11:01]And it's not always been blatant. It's very subtle. It's, oh, you have money.

[00:11:07]Oh, you have disposable income to do this. I have a child. I can't do this. I can't show up for you because I have to pay this bill. And it's you have the luxury to do this. Why are you unhappy?

[00:11:18]You have disposable income to do whatever. You don't have to worry about anything. Your life is perfect. And while I don't and will never regret those choices, I do however feel super sad about the loneliness that I experience and just how people will not support you. They will not show up for you if you're not on the same level as them. I don't have the luxury of asking anyone around me for financial help. So, I asked him to just show up, answer the phone when I call, listen to me when I talk, because in my opinion, that's the bare minimum for a friendship. I don't ask anybody to pay my bills. And guess what? They don't even do that. And we don't talk about this loneliness that we feel as child-free people, especially women. I feel like a resource to the people around me. I feel like a bank, a ATM because I don't have certain responsibilities because I didn't make certain choices my resources me as I am seen as a resource. I'm used as a resource and they don't think to pour back into me and it's very lonely and sitting on that boundary is also very lonely.

[00:12:31]>> This is something that nobody talks about but it's important and it's real.

[00:12:37]The pain that comes with being single years and years and years and years is deep. You know, no matter if you are successful, beautiful, super fit, uh super rich, have everything in the world, have so many friends, have been traveling all over the world, you know, like look at me, I'm single and happy.

[00:12:58]Yeah, you can be. But with it comes a pain of not being witnessed. comes a pain where you wake up every day and you have to give yourself all the love, all the motivation, all the ya, let's go do it. It's not it's not easy and nobody talks about how we feel inside when years and years and years and years and years pass by and you're actually just still single because I don't know because of what so many reasons.

[00:13:36]Um and I just wanted to talk about it because it's hard like I'm a very very positive person. I work on myself. I'm active. I have good career. I have amazing family, so many friends. Just came back from DC last night because I was visiting my friends there. Like everything looks perfect and is perfect, but there is a pain that really lingers in my soul about the years that keep passing by while I'm not witnessed. And I know that I'm not alone in this. probably there are so many other people, women and men both, that feel the pain of aloneeness.

[00:14:20]I've been feeling so rejected lately.

[00:14:23]I'm a single person who doesn't want to be single anymore. Like every guy, or I guess the last few guys that I've dated, they've all ended up having some reason that they had to veil, like some unresolved trauma or situation or whatever.

[00:14:43]And lately I've been trying to date again and like using the apps which is not my favorite and I don't drink and I don't really go out. So um and I just get like no matches or the ones I get like I message them and they don't respond and it just gets to the point that it's like what do I do?

[00:15:08]I keep trying and nothing's working. So, what do I do? I feel rejected and like the bottom of the barrel and like no one wants to take a chance on me or try or no one's interested in me. And at what point do you just like give up? And at what point like how can I not feel like something's wrong with me or like I'm just a major red flag that I just don't understand.

[00:15:41]But when do you give up and when do you just how do you get that confidence back?

[00:15:50]Today's the day I found out that my ex-husband of literally yesterday like our divorce was literally finalized yesterday. Today I found out he already has a girlfriend and I'm just struggling so much. Like this is the first time since I've been here that I've been like I don't want to be alone and haven't had that feeling in like a four or five months and um just don't I just don't feel safe in my body right now. And it just sucks so bad. And I don't have a ton of people here. Like my one girlfriend just moved away. And it's just really hard being out here.

[00:16:47]And like some days are great and some days I really struggle. But I do have some guy friends that told me to come over. So, I was like trying to I was trying to do it myself. I really was. I was really trying to handle it. And I'm just like I cannot like I cannot I just cannot sit at home alone again right now. So thankful for them. And I'm going to head over there now and hopefully not look like a hot mess when I get there.

[00:17:24]Um, I think I've gotten stood up because I was supposed to go on a date tonight and I drove 40 minutes to this man's place and um, he texts me 10 minutes as I'm driving and he goes, "Oh, um, I'll let you know when to come cuz I'm talking to my family right now." Like he was calling his family and I was like, "Oh, that's fine." like arrived and I was like, "Oh, okay. He'll just be on call with his family for a bit." Like, "No, no biggie." 30 minutes [ __ ] later, no text, no call, like nothing after I say, "Oh, oops. I arrived early." He said, "Haha, [ __ ] for [ __ ] sake." Um, I'm by the water, so I park near the water.

[00:18:11]Can't see this man. And um like at all, like mind you, like the there's a lot of [ __ ] water, so he could be anywhere.

[00:18:19]And um 30 minutes goes by. 30 minutes goes by.

[00:18:27]No response. No response. I text him. I text him and I say I text him and I say I say like, "Okay, this is like kind of ridiculous now. Can you can you text me back?" And then nothing. Mind you, at this point, I was just like, "You know what? I'm going to stick this [ __ ] out cuz I want to I want to literally rage. Um, it's been a [ __ ] hour, guys.

[00:19:00]An hour. No text, no call. Mind you, I've tried to call him. Tried to call him. Attempted. Nothing. Dry. Dryer than my [ __ ] cooch right now. I am so angry. I I could actually be violent.

[00:19:15]Like I'm just, you know what I'm expecting to see right now? I'm expecting to see him with another girl walk straight past me.

[00:19:23]Like that's that's exactly what I'm like my mind is picturing right now. And I just want it to be true so I can go out there and strangle him.

[00:19:34]Anyway, I hope your night's better than mine because I think I might have to drive home.

[00:19:40]Um 40-minute drive home. And mind you, this is like 20 minutes away from my work tomorrow, so that's just a big plus for me. So, hope your night's going better than mine. I'm lonely.

[00:19:54]Um, so if anyone else has been lonely, dealt with loneliness, any tips on managing it?

[00:20:06]This is the longest I've been single.

[00:20:08]It's weird and I try to keep myself busy so I don't think about it, but I'm lonely.

[00:20:18]I've been alone for so long that even if I had someone in my life, I I honestly don't even know what I would do when it came to taking that next step. Here's the thing.

[00:20:30]I love my house. I love being able to go to sleep when I want. I love being able to watch TV when I want, what I want.

[00:20:39]Um, I just love being home doing nothing. So, if I ever did get married again, he would probably have to live next door and it would work out great.

[00:20:52]Just saying. I don't know how to say this without it potentially coming across wrong, but [ __ ] it. I'm gonna try. I'm the only single one in my girlfriend's group, and that is so totally fine. Okay. I'm so happy for my friends that they found their person.

[00:21:04]They're in happy, thriving relationships. They've got their kids and that's amazing. However, I'm at that part in my life where I'm like, "Oh, yeah, I could actually do with that."

[00:21:12]Like, I don't drink. I don't party. I don't do any of that stuff. And like, I spend most of the weekend by myself. And it kind of sucks because my friends are my people, but my people have their own people. That's not me. But that doesn't mean that I'm I'm not important to them.

[00:21:28]It just means that they've got other people to spend time with and I don't.

[00:21:32]Yeah. And when you really want that thing, you can't help but feel different when you see that everyone else has that thing. Anyway, I've I've started dating again, so we'll see how that goes. But does anyone else feel like this? Let me know. Does anyone else just feel like on a really deep intuitive level that you were never going to be in a relationship again? I truly don't feel capable of ever getting there again for so many reasons and on so many levels. I have just protected my peace so incredibly hard. And the last time that I was in a relationship, I was like literally at the lowest of lows. And now I'm just so like my body is just so like against it.

[00:22:13]I just don't see myself ever being able to fully trust that it's right for me. Like and trust that it's safe for me. Like I truly don't I truly think I'm going to die alone.

[00:22:27]because of this internal battle that I have with myself. So yeah, happy Wednesday. This is the reality of healing. It's 7:30 in the morning.

[00:22:39]nothing has happened and I'm just crying and I don't want to feel like this anymore and I'm so frustrated that I do and it's it's I just want it to be done and I just want to be happy and it's so hard.

[00:23:01]Can we talk about why modern women are lonier than ever? Because nobody wants to admit the real reason. I see it everywhere. Successful women with amazing careers, perfect Instagram feeds, but they're absolutely miserable and isolated. And I know because I used to be one of them. We were told that independence was everything. That we didn't need anyone, that needing people was weakness. So, we built these perfect little walls around ourselves. We chose careers over relationships. being right over being loved and proving ourselves over connecting with others. We pushed away anyone who tried to get close to us because we had to be strong. And now we're sitting in our perfectly decorated apartments scrolling through dating apps wondering why we feel so empty inside.

[00:23:50]We have everything modern feminism promised us, but we've never been more alone. Because the truth is, humans are wired for connection. Especially women, we need community, partnership, and deep relationships. But we've been convinced that wanting these things makes us weak or pickmies. The loneliness epidemic isn't an accident. It's what happens when you tell women to reject everything that actually fulfills them. You can have all the success in the world, but if you don't have real connection, you have nothing. lifelong singleness is heartbreaking because as a firstborn daughter in a Jamaican household, two-time cancer survivor, only, you know, only child. It's it's it's a lot to deal with. And when I'm overwhelmed, I could use a loving person in my life to help balance me out. I'm so used to regulating the emotions of everybody else, and no one else studies me as closely as I study them. And I I would like the love that I've given. I'm ready for it to come back now because I'm feeling overwhelmed and I and I wish I had that level of attentiveness. I wish I had, you know, in the books it's like the guy came out of nowhere and just, you know, gave all the resources to the woman and provided so she can have an easy comfortable life. Like I said cancer twice. I've had it twice. I don't need any more stress. I'm good. You know, I I I don't have one more character development in me. I don't got it in me. Okay? I don't need no more.

[00:25:22]You know, God gives his toughest jobs to his toughest soldiers. No, I want to just be I just want to sleep. Okay. All I want to do is provide. No, I just want to take Jackie to spas and get cookies and travel and go to the spa. That's it.

[00:25:40]Every other bit of nonsense, I don't I I can't do I just I wish I had someone.

[00:25:46]So, yeah. Something I didn't really anticipate in my life being single is that the more successful you get, the more single kind of hurts. You would think it would be the opposite. I don't know if I want to admit this on camera, but maybe somebody else is feeling like this and maybe they need to hear it.

[00:26:10]Okay, I am a very independent person. I pride myself on like I can do anything alone. You've seen me talk about it on here. But I'm at a point in my life right now where I am arguably the most successful I've ever been personally. I own my own home. I'm in my dream show in Las Vegas about to start a top secret new project that is the first of its kind. Been doing commercials left and right. My social media starting to kind of take off.

[00:26:42]I'm more financially secure than I've been in many years. all doing things that I built myself. But at the end of the day, I come home to my house that I bought myself and I have nobody to talk to about any of this. I have tons of friends and lots of you in my DMs, but at the end of the day, I am still home by myself.

[00:27:10]And at the end of the day, I think the thing about being single that people in a relationship don't quite understand or forget is that you have a built-in person. Like, you have a built-in friend all the time. I get invited to all these events and I'm always like, who am I going to bring? And then none of my friends can go cuz our schedules are not the same or and I'm always just like, well, am I going to go if I have to go by myself? And I I usually end up going alone cuz being alone is never going to stop me.

[00:27:37]But I'm just getting tired. And ironically, the more successful I get, the worse this feels, not the better it feels. You would think it would be the opposite. You would think, "Oh, when you're successful and everything else is going right in your life, then that's going to suck less." Uh-uh. Uh-uh. You want to share those things with people.

[00:28:00]I want to go out and do stuff. I'm just kind of tired.

[00:28:04]Being independent is great.

[00:28:08]But sharing your life with somebody, the little things with people, not just the big going out for margaritas with the girlfriends or family functions. Like, I want the little things all the time.

[00:28:17]Anyway, if you feel like me, you're not alone. I guess that's the point of the video. If you're a solid bad bee, keep rocking and don't settle. I don't want these things bad enough to settle. So, I'm just waiting for somebody to meet me where I'm at, I guess.

[00:28:35]Heat. Heat. N.