BEN AVERY COMES UP WITH A LIST OF REASONS — BEN AVERY

Added: 2026-06-01

[00:00:00]It doesn't matter where you live.

[00:00:03]The American fantasy of like, oh, if I lived in a great country like Japan, I wouldn't suffer. Incorrect.

[00:00:09]Incorrect. That's that's cope. Figure >> no one. This is worldwide right now. No one's doing well. I am not doing well.

[00:00:31]Check this out. Check out this Japanese guy.

[00:00:35]He's sad. He's a sad man.

[00:00:43]The thumbnail says his life is very hard. He's just wildly depressed.

[00:00:51]You know, the interesting thing about these types of videos is you see this, the Doritos, the Pepsi. He lives in Japan. He's playing video games at the kitchen table and you go, "Man, that kicks ass."

[00:01:04]But this guy couldn't be sadder.

[00:01:07]He couldn't be more depressed. If only we could see our lives the way we see other people's lives. Why can't we see ourselves in the manner that we see others?

[00:01:20]>> Yeah.

[00:01:21]>> Why can't we know other people?

[00:01:24]>> Why can't we know ourselves in the way that we know other people? Why are things more interesting on our phones than in real life?

[00:01:31]>> It's such a strange phenomena.

[00:01:35]>> Um, >> you might say to me one day, "My life sucks ass. Life doesn't rep." But if I gave you Doritos and a Pepsi and I made you play video games at the kitchen table, would you say, "Yeah, it does actually kick ass." But you could just do that at any moment, you know? Or if this was your life, you might be miserable.

[00:01:57]But then you see someone else do you go, "Wow, that's that's beautiful. That's that's amazing. Look how sad this man is. This Japanese man, this poor man.

[00:02:05]I haven't eaten do almost one year.

[00:02:22]Actually I I ate another taste of the toast like a cheesy taste but uh another one was not my taste. This is my best and always best combination of a Pepsi. So the reason why the reason why I have come back my origin >> it's his origin >> he's trying to find the old him when he was happy >> and a super fam you see I have supercom >> Street Fighter >> Street Fighter 2 is that I was trying to make myself more cool, you know, more legitimate.

[00:03:18]>> Yeah.

[00:03:18]>> More serious. But um I have just realized that I should go back to my origin where I came from and um because many of you have given me the comments saying so we we we miss Doritos Pap playing the the super famicone retro games.

[00:03:58]>> I mean, if we went to the whiteboard right now, right?

[00:04:02]This is the strange thing about modern life. If we went to the whiteboard right now, do you think we could make more like if I made if I split this into two reasons to kill myself, reasons to not myself?

[00:04:19]Don't you think there'd be way more? I mean, how gay would you feel if you wrote reasons to kill yourself and on there you put like systemic reasons?

[00:04:33]I want to kill myself because well well we can't get good health care or well we can't well racism exists.

[00:04:44]Do people kill themselves and write answers down like that in their suicide note?

[00:04:50]Just the I'm a victim. I'm an eternal victim no matter what type stuff.

[00:04:57]You guys want me to do the whiteboard?

[00:05:00]I mean, I don't even know. Hey, let's go.

[00:05:09]Okay. I mean, I don't even know if I don't know if I could come up with any reason to kill myself.

[00:05:17]I really don't. Um, honestly, that's a tough one.

[00:05:36]A vin diagram of reasons to kill ourselves. It's Yeah, it's the same as not here.

[00:05:46]Where's my damn Okay. See if this works.

[00:05:50]All right.

[00:05:52]Okay. So, I went to the Walmart.

[00:05:56]I called Mark and I said, "Mark, do you need any of the rotty piper Coca-Cola down at the Walmart?"

[00:06:03]Okay. So, [ __ ] Okay, here we go.

[00:06:42]I'll let you guys go. Go ahead.

[00:06:45]Shout me out.

[00:06:48]You You guys let me know here because I don't have a damn reason.

[00:06:53]I don't have one damn reason. I'm very grateful.

[00:06:57]Christ is king. I love God. I have so much more to explore in terms of, you know, I I have I have I'm ordering books constantly on eBay.

[00:07:09]I'm reading voraciously. There's so much I want to learn. There's so much I want to do. I have zero reason to kill myself.

[00:07:17]But I'll you guys, what do you think?

[00:07:20]What do you mean fix the camera angle?

[00:07:22]What's wrong with it?

[00:07:24]You guys can see the whiteboard just fine, right?

[00:07:27]Switch the camera. If I switch the camera, it's this.

[00:07:38]Like seriously, for everybody out there, cuz I see weepy, sad people on the internet all the time saying, "Oh, I want to kill myself." Why do you want to kill yourself? Let's talk about it.

[00:07:46]Let's get down to the core of this.

[00:07:50]Why do you guys want to kill yourselves?

[00:07:52]I genuinely don't get it.

[00:07:58]Come on, let me hear it.

[00:08:02]Let me hear it.

[00:08:04]Right now, Pawn Water, I'm reading SC Gwyn's um um uh Empire of the Summer Moon right now.

[00:08:15]I read a little bit of the Iliad last night.

[00:08:29]I can think of uh okay let's say should we try to imagine someone who absolutely should kill themselves right now. Okay, let's let's do this, right?

[00:08:48]Reason reasons to myself. Okay, I'm going to try to imagine the worst possible life in which I have uh Okay, so let's change this reason to myself fantasy.

[00:09:13]So this is a fantasy.

[00:09:16]What would happen to happen for me to kill myself?

[00:09:21]Okay, I would have to have done I'd have to be very evil.

[00:09:29]So if I've gone through life just hurting every my killed itself while we were talking about dying every day we eat good 112 testing check.

[00:09:50]I got it Jack. Thank you.

[00:09:53]Okay. So, every day we eat good.

[00:10:05]Wonder if I can get the smart the whiteboard and the I think this as far back as I can go.

[00:10:18]I'm against the wall here.

[00:10:29]And then obviously we don't want to get a strike here.

[00:10:33]So let's just put a thing through that.

[00:10:36]Okay. So very evil.

[00:10:40]If I was like a pain boss inflicting pain upon everybody, right? If my family gone.

[00:10:55]Family gone. I'll say this too. if I lost the ability to have memory.

[00:11:08]So if I got a fasia or something like that or um maybe if I had some weird thing where I couldn't uh Oh, I got one. I got weird. How about a weird fetish? So, I'm gonna put weird fetish on here because if I developed a weird fetish because of a brain tumor or something like that, I'd probably off myself.

[00:11:49]Especially because it'd be bad for my brand if I did.

[00:11:53]Like if I was into like beating up little girls and stuff or like little boys, just hurting them real bad, I'd probably take myself out.

[00:12:07]Uh let's see here.

[00:12:10]So if I was a very evil guy who hurt people and my family was gone, my memory started to go and I started to like basically become a weird sick stom masochistic pedophile of some kind.

[00:12:27]Um let's see here.

[00:12:35]Oh my Have my penis like turned into a like a really hard stone.

[00:12:47]If it if it turned into into stone like it was it some weird crazy uh like scleraderma. Isn't that what it's called? What was that thing that Bob uh Bob from Full House was his name?

[00:13:05]Where your skin gets really hard. Like if I got like a leprosy of the penis, how about leprosy?

[00:13:12]Lep leprosy of the penis. Okay, so leprosy of the penis. If I got a weird uh stone in my [ __ ] for sure.

[00:13:30]Uh let's see here.

[00:13:34]If my If I [ __ ] out my balls, I'll say that.

[00:13:42]If I [ __ ] out both balls, can you guys see that? Yes. So, if I [ __ ] out both balls, that would [ __ ] suck ass.

[00:14:01]I have inherited a major uh I have inherited a major financial complex from my father because growing up my father would always say me and your mom we don't know how we're going to make it the next month. We just we just don't have a lot of money.

[00:14:22]Me and your mom just money's just we don't know what we're going to do.

[00:14:28]And it turned out that they were always fine and they are fine now.

[00:14:34]But if you have kids, it's probably not a good idea to sit them down at the dinner table every night and tell them that they're about to be homeless.

[00:14:44]I cannot manage money in any way.

[00:14:48]I can't think about money. It makes me very very stressed.

[00:14:54]You think that it would have put me in a position where I would do anything for money and it would be very easy to compromise me but I actually went the other way where I don't value money.

[00:15:05]Uh so you know Jesus in the desert you know say no to the say no to every all the power out there all the temptations say no to it the political power the money say no to all of it. You got to be you got to unchain yourself from the material world. You got to be like a bird. You got to fly in the sky. You got to be above it all.

[00:15:28]Uh you got to reject the material, folks. There's no other way. But you you got to pay your bills at the same time.

[00:15:35]You don't want to let the devil in your front door. That's all I'm saying.

[00:15:40]But my I inherited a huge financial complex from my from my from my parents.

[00:15:46]We don't know what we're going to We just me and your mom, we don't know what we're going to do about money. I'm sitting there. I'm like, nine. And I'm like eating potatoes. I'm like uh what?

[00:15:56]Uh uh what?

[00:16:03]Yeah. We We don't know what we're going to do about money.

[00:16:07]Me and your mom, we don't got a lot of money. We just All All my dad ever talked about was money. And then when I left, every dad tries, no matter how shitty they are, they try to give you financial advice or not finan, they try to give you life advice when you're going to college or you're leaving the house, they'll give you one piece of advice. My father gave me one piece of advice and he said, "Whatever you do in life, make sure that you just make a lot of money. Just make a lot of money."

[00:16:41]In my head I'm like, is that is that Christian?

[00:16:47]My dad goes to church like three times a week. He's always reading the Bible and talking about Jesus in heaven. You can't take it with you. And the only advice he gives me out the front door is just just just the earth and take it for everything it's worth.

[00:17:02]Like, dad, what about heaven? And and Jesus is like, yeah, but but you got to be rich.

[00:17:08]If you're not rich, then you you're thinking about yourself all the time.

[00:17:18]Whatever you do in life, just, you know, just don't let a black person behind you. If you're around blacks, keep your head on a swivel. All right? Don't tell people that your daddy never taught you anything.

[00:17:35]Never rent from a Jew.

[00:17:38]And don't let a black person behind you and make a lot of money. That's Jimmy Avery.

[00:17:51]Uh, so if I my penis turned to stone and it had weird leprosy scuroderma and I [ __ ] at both my balls and it hurt.

[00:18:03]Uh what's what was that king? Was it was it King Nebuchadnezzar that was struck down with uh remember he turned into some sort of beast and he had to roam the fields and eat grass in the Old Testament? If I got something like that, like I'm going to say boine.

[00:18:26]Boine disease.

[00:18:34]Uh oh, I'll put this. Uh I'm going put wife. Wife lets selfgo.

[00:18:47]I'll put like a wife gets fat.

[00:18:54]Um, I don't know. Like, if I was in uh honestly, dude, like I'm I'm going to put the debt like debt, dude. If I was like we have student loans and stuff with my wife, but other than that, you know, I know of people with four $500,000 in debt and not the kind of debt where it's a mortgage. It's like, you know, credit card, student loans. You're like, "Oh my god, I would I'd kill myself if I were you." But good for you. You keep going. You keep going.

[00:19:38]Wow. 39% interest on that. Wow.

[00:19:41]Incredible. Awesome. And then you pass the debt down to your kids. Yeah, I'd myself.

[00:19:47]I'd I'd uh I' I'd make me and my family disappear if I were you.

[00:19:56]Uh so this is kind of the like if all of these things then yeah, maybe I would myself. But the truth is is regardless of all this stuff here, you could throw everything. How about How about I get every day? Every day.

[00:20:19]Every day I I get so some sort of situation.

[00:20:29]Uh what was that guy's name? Ariel Castro in Ohio. Let's say I stumble into a guy's, you know, I I'm walking down the wrong alley at night when one day I get thrown in a van. I wake up and I'm in a hole in someone's living room and they're lowering down a sponge and a video camera.

[00:20:50]I could say, "Well, yeah, if you threw a gun down here, I might blow my own brains out." So, if I got every day, yeah, then sure. Maybe I'd myself I don't think I could get like I could I like to think that I'm kind of a pull yourself up by your bootstraps kind of guy. If I was getting every day I could look dude I've had bad jobs before in my life and I just wake up I go to the job it's whatever you know you listen to a podcast. If I was getting I put in a podcast, find some good music, zone out. It is what it is.

[00:21:33]I could not get just I I couldn't get for nine months. Let's put it that way.

[00:21:42]I could do a a job I really really really hate that pays me like [ __ ] for like a year. I can do that for a year. So I could confidently say I could get I could get for I don't know six, seven months then I'm out.

[00:22:12]But to tell you the truth, even if all this was happening to me, right?

[00:22:19]Even if even if I was trafficked, right, if all this if all this stuff happened to me, you know what I would do actually?

[00:22:39]Because folks, folks, I'm not your run-of-the-mill run-of-the-mill uh believer.

[00:22:56]I want you to I want to tell you that I have been badly beaten and broken.

[00:23:02]And at the end of the day, no matter what happens, folks, I'll always praise God.

[00:23:09]So people say, "Well, if all that stuff was happening to you, if you were being raped, your wife got fat, you were in a massive amount of debt, wouldn't you take your own life?" No.

[00:23:20]In fact, it would only bring me closer to Christ. It' only bring me closer to my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. So you say that would make you yourself and for me that would just make me praise God.

[00:23:37]Praise God.

[00:23:42]That would just make me praise God, brother.

[00:23:51]Praise God, brother.

[00:23:56]I would just praise God.

[00:24:00]Yeah.

[00:24:03]This This is my church where I go, "What if what if you got every day? Would you stop believing God?"

[00:24:13]I'm like, "I would."

[00:24:15]I could Brothers and sisters, who who here amongst us want to get every day and still believe in in Jesus Christ?

[00:24:27]But think about it. You can't believe in God and like Christ and stuff like on some sort of conditional level. That doesn't make any sense. It can't be conditional. It has to be unconditional.

[00:24:37]No, I believe in God. In my heart of hearts, I believe in God no matter what.

[00:24:45]God's got a plan. If you're being if you're being if you're if you're being every day that's maybe that's bringing you closer to God. I don't know who's to who's to say really.

[00:25:06]We can't understand the divine uh our his divine will.

[00:25:14]Every day we eat good. What do you want from me?

[00:25:19]Every day we eat good.

[00:25:31]Let me turn this off so we can use it later to teach.

[00:25:37]It breathes.

[00:25:40]There we go. It's off now.

[00:25:43]Can't wait to put these new headphones back on.

[00:25:48]God, I love these new headphones.

[00:25:56]Oh, that's nice. Oh, that feels so good in my ear. Why haven't I been using these all along? These are very Oh, that's nice.

[00:26:07]Oh, that's lovely. Actually, I love that. Oh, that's beautiful. It sounds good.

[00:26:18]Japanese people kill themselves all the time, but that's just because they're Japanese. I don't make the rules >> until >> See, so look at this.

[00:26:32]Everybody's having the same problems right now. It doesn't matter where you live.

[00:26:38]The American fantasy of like, oh, if I lived in a great country like Japan, I wouldn't suffer. Incorrect.

[00:26:44]Incorrect. That's that's cope. Figure your life out here. You're not going anywhere.

[00:26:59]>> If you're a weepy [ __ ] here, you're going to be a weepy [ __ ] there. That's all I'm going to say. That's all I'm going to say. you. There's opportunity everywhere to be a victim. That's what you want to be. You're going to be that over there, too.

[00:27:14]>> No offense.

[00:27:15]>> Hi. So, money, it's all about money.

[00:27:23]I don't want to talk about and uh I don't want to think about however I have to think about because our family finance will be very very tough from December. So, I told my wife that I fantasize about throwing the kids out the window and drowning her in the bathtub and then hanging myself in the living room. Cuz I do not like thinking about money. You miss Japan.

[00:27:54]And in Japan, when things are not going good, you kill yourself. That's why our trains are so fast, so you can jump in front of them and you turn into vapor.

[00:28:03]In Japan, we have very fast trains.

[00:28:07]Unfortunately, some of the trains, they do levitate with magnets and all that. So, sometimes the train goes right over you. But it's okay. It's okay. I am comforted by the idea of murder suiciding my whole family.

[00:28:24]I will play video games tonight and drink beer and eat the think about try not to think about ripping my children's heads off or shoving my wife's head in the trash compactor or putting my hands in the garbage disposal.

[00:28:42]I love street fighter too.

[00:28:45]I'm a Japanese man. I will be independent and my our family revenue resource will be only my YouTube revenue.

[00:28:59]>> It's a hard life, buddy. Let me tell you, it's tough. It's tough. It's tough not having the health insurance. That's really the big thing. That's not having those benefits that you need. That's the hardest part.

[00:29:12]until my new business becomes stable and I don't know when it will be. So that's why I thought that first I have to look at our household expenses and I want to review the household expenses.

[00:29:36]So how much we have spent for what and how much we will need for what. So what I am going to show you today is just a part of my expenses how much I have spent forward and this is just one of them. So in the in future I will make more detailed summary to show you. So how much as our family spend have spent for what? So before continue we only dream about rape.

[00:30:19]I only dream about. Sometimes at night I drink a bottle of vodka and I walk around the convenience store by my house hoping that I have the opportunity to and sometimes I do have the opportunity to but I do not take that opportunity.

[00:30:40]I am a YouTuber. I am very sad.

[00:30:50]He has a lot of subs.

[00:30:53]He's gonna make it.

[00:30:57]I don't even know why we brought that guy up.

[00:31:00]That Japanese guy.

[00:31:08]Don't you like my time?