I NEVER FOUND PEACE IN OUR MARRIAGE || Justice Court EP 283

Added: 2026-05-24

[00:00:00]Today before the justice court, the plaintiff petitions for an order compelling her husband to provide upkeep for their children.

[00:00:22]All eyes in session. Honorable Judge Fi as our preciding.

[00:00:40]Please be seated.

[00:00:45]>> Your honor, this case is between Zenabidi and Shri.

[00:00:53]>> Thank you.

[00:00:54]>> You're welcome. Is it?

[00:00:57]>> Yes. My home.

[00:00:58]>> You brought shri >> Yes.

[00:01:06]>> Yes. Why are you here?

[00:01:07]>> I'm here because he used to be my husband. I left the marriage due to domestic violence and he's a chain smoker of Hindian hem. He smokes in front of the kids and whenever we're having issues in the house, he destroys my property. So, and he told me that he wants to start a fresh that he has no peace of mind that he's fed up of the marriage. I need to move away from him.

[00:01:37]So, I left. But before leaving, I went to the um human woman human affairs ministry of woman affairs in Aun state.

[00:01:46]I reported there and they called him.

[00:01:50]They told him to take up his responsibility. But ever since I left, he stopped paying their school fees.

[00:01:57]Child support, he refused to do that.

[00:01:59]Health, he refused to give me the pin for health. So that's why I'm here.

[00:02:06]Before I go, I'm not sure of the position on the allegation. Do you smoke in their hand?

[00:02:12]>> I used to smoke then.

[00:02:13]>> You used to smoke, but you have stopped.

[00:02:15]Yes, ma'am.

[00:02:16]>> You know it's illegal, ma'am.

[00:02:18]>> It's illegal and it's not good around the children. Do you understand?

[00:02:21]>> I never smoke around children. It's just >> it's not even good for you and at the same time, you know, it's illegal. It's not acceptable.

[00:02:30]Okay, I'm listening. Let me have your response.

[00:02:35]>> Um, the thing is she claimed that I used to smoke in the presence of the children. That's a pure lie. I never smoke in the presence of my children. Um what happened is >> And you said you don't smoke anymore.

[00:02:47]>> Yeah, I I stopped.

[00:02:49]>> Okay.

[00:02:49]>> To be sincere, I stopped. But so what happened? What happened is that um she used to be my wife throughout the marriage throughout I never have peace with her because she has never appreciate anything that I do for her. There's nothing there is nothing I would do.

[00:03:07]>> You mentioned issue of domestic violence. How true is that? Yeah, I can remember we had fight like twice throughout the marriage. Like twice or three times throughout the marriage.

[00:03:18]>> Physical fight.

[00:03:19]>> Yes. She initiate she used to initiate the fight.

[00:03:22]>> Who won?

[00:03:23]>> Ma >> who won.

[00:03:28]>> So >> you understand that's beating. You beat her up.

[00:03:32]>> M it's not as if I beat her. It's not as she always initiate the fight like in the pro of leave me. stop then she's like trying to defend myself and all that that that will result to that fight. It's not as if I just wake up and start beating his wife.

[00:03:48]>> No, there are.

[00:03:49]>> Yes.

[00:03:52]In the pro stop, leave me and she'll start dragging and dragging out that will lead to pushing and all those things.

[00:03:58]>> You just push her.

[00:03:59]>> Not like you just normal fight. Yes, ma'am.

[00:04:04]>> That's what I'm telling you is wrong. Do you understand? And if you are of the habit of provoking a man, you should stop it.

[00:04:12]>> Ma, >> do you understand? And every action leads to a reaction. And the way everybody react is different. It's just that I know it's not good. You know, we all know because men are built stronger.

[00:04:25]Although we have women that beat up their men too. Neither one is good. And it's something you have to stop.

[00:04:32]Especially when you have children around you. They grow up thinking that's the normal way to live. and they grow up and start, you know, having that kind of relationship in their marriage. Is that something you want for your children? Is it?

[00:04:47]>> No.

[00:04:48]>> I'm listening to you. Okay. So, what happened was that um 20 24 December during the December period something happened. So, and I was like she lost her younger sister though. So, this younger sister and the mother is the only people that used to come to celebrate Christmas with us. So during that time I said okay has this thing happened like this so we cannot do anything here let's go to your mom's place and make her happy like let's go and do this Christmas day and make her happy do you think we can use there to just to within herself there she said I should give her 70,000 NRA and I said ah my wife please let me give you 60,000 NRA the next thing she she will say to me is hold your money I was like this touch me like ah Okay fine. And before that time she has been doing something that I will sit down in the house like this. She will just walk out of the house without telling me anything. She can go like 2 3 days without telling me anything. She's been she's been doing it often. So that day she did that thing that December.

[00:06:03]So on December day December 25, 2025 and now went to the mom's place. She was there. I met her there. Then I called them that see see what is happening or see what my wife is doing or that I'm tired. I'm fed up of all this uh behavior like the next thing the mom the her mom will talk about is if I'm tired everybody should go their separate ways.

[00:06:30]I was shocked like is it a setup or something? Okay fine.

[00:06:37]Then from there because I said I'm that the way she's behaving I'm fed up and I I don't understand her anymore. Then the mom said if I'm tired if I'm tired everybody should go se their se separate ways. Immediately they change it for me that I said I'm fed up that I'm not doing again. I'm fed of the marriage.

[00:06:54]This is that immed right.

[00:06:55]>> When did you when did the two of you stop living together?

[00:06:58]>> She packed out of the house. Um >> we stopped living together April.

[00:07:05]No, February 2025.

[00:07:09]Ma, can I my honorable can I say something pertaining to that? Well, I lost my sister during that period. So, I was the only one around my mom. So, and he he lives here in Lagos. He comes home, let me say, once or twice in a month.

[00:07:26]>> Where is home?

[00:07:27]>> I stay in Abbeuta.

[00:07:30]He comes home just once in a month or twice. So sometimes I go to my mom's place because whenever the place is boring I keep her company. So that fateful day before then he stopped. He said he doesn't have money to send for feeding.

[00:07:47]When he told me that I said I'm owing some people because I took some loan from some people I used to buy food and other things in the house. She said no problem that since that's the case this Christmas period we should go to my mom's place and celebrate the Christmas there with her that how much will be okay I said you know right from time we stock our home with food 70,000 is okay he said he doesn't have 70,000 he only has 50,000 okay if that's the case let's go to the market together I buy you pay so that you see how expensive things s >> but but you know one thing and I always say that and I'm of strongly of that opinion if um if you need 70,000 for the home front and the husband is providing 60,000 NRA I don't see any reason why the woman should not come up with the 10,000 NRA difference that should not be an issue >> ma I'm coming >> especially if he's not once in a while if a man is responsible and suddenly they has that financial challenges why can't you step up >> okay ma I said okay if that's the case let's go to he said he's not going to the market with me so he called me that he was on his way to Abeuta that where where precisely I was at that moment I told him I'm at home that I just finished cooking he entered I I served him his food immediately within 10 it.

[00:09:27]He went behind the house because the compound where we stay, they sell this Indian hair behind the house. He went behind.

[00:09:36]>> That's your your parents' place?

[00:09:38]>> No. Rented apartment.

[00:09:40]>> Okay.

[00:09:40]>> He went behind to smoke that Indian he came inside. He was smelling of the Indian hem.

[00:09:47]>> Was he smoking it before you married him?

[00:09:49]>> I didn't know.

[00:09:51]>> Were you smoking it?

[00:09:52]>> Yes, I was.

[00:09:52]>> She knew you were smoking it. She didn't know.

[00:09:55]>> She knew. She did not.

[00:09:56]>> She did not know.

[00:09:57]>> So I told him, "So you just finished smoking. If these children were here, so definitely they will see it because my son always comes home to tell me I see my daddy doing something inside paper smoking. I shut him up." I was like, "Why will you do such? Her first son is 11 already. And if you make him see this as a good thing, he will pick it up.

[00:10:23]Don't do this. He became violent. I kept quiet.

[00:10:28]The next day I saw he was not ready to discuss anything with me. I picked up my back because I knew at that moment if I exchanged words with him, it will become something else. Is either he hits me or destroy my property. I left and I went to my mom's place. So I was there thinking at least let the atmosphere be calm. On the 25th he came there. He saw the kids.

[00:10:56]So he said, he met my mom and some of our family there. He said, "Mommy, I want to speak to you on something." My mom was like, "At this moment, you can see I'm mourning. You're not supposed to come here and start telling me such. Eh, mommy, I'm tired of everything. I'm sick and tired of this marriage. I think everybody should depart because ever since I married her for the past 10 years, I've not been going forward financially. My mom, my uncles and my aunties, they said even if your hus your wife and yourself are having issue, you shouldn't bring it here right now. Wait after everything you come back and we settle everything. And moreover, you have no right to say such. husband and wife they quarrel and they make up. He said he's tired. My uncle was like, "Okay, apologize for that statement." He said he can't apologize that everybody should go their different ways. And my mom spoke up. I can't lose my daughter again because you've been beating her.

[00:12:04]I've not been saying anything. You hit her. The last time I was pregnant, he hit me and I was bleeding through my nose. My mom was like, "I can't allow you kill this one again. If that's what you want, go."

[00:12:21]And he was saying it. I had no choice. I went back home to the plaintiff. Zayab Olid asserts that she left the marriage due to domestic violence and because the defendant desired spay sisters aresh.

[00:12:37]She stated that prior to leaving she reported the marital issues to the Ministry of Women Affairs where an agreement was reached regarding the children's maintenance. However, she has returned to court because the defendant has failed to honor that agreement. The defendant Shriolu Oludo contends that the few altercations during the marriage were instigated by the plaintiff. He further alleges that he seized providing upkeep when his access to the children was restricted. Judge Fi went into this matter.

[00:13:18]>> Um the bottom line is where where you are now. Where are the children with you?

[00:13:24]>> Yes. Yeah.

[00:13:25]>> And how many are they?

[00:13:26]>> There are three.

[00:13:27]>> Three of them. What's the age of the children?

[00:13:30]>> The first will be 11. The second will be six. Then the third is a year and a half.

[00:13:36]>> Yeah. Yeah. I think in school.

[00:13:39]>> Yes. The first is in secondary school while the second is still in primary.

[00:13:44]>> Then the last.

[00:13:47]>> So have you been picking up the >> Yes, ma'am. Still phase.

[00:13:51]>> Yes. Up to date on that. No. No ma'am. I stopped because she blocked my access to the kids. That's why I stopped because >> why do you do that? You want him to be paying the fees, but you don't want him to have access.

[00:14:05]>> Can I say something, my honor?

[00:14:06]>> Okay.

[00:14:07]>> He refused. I gave him access, but I stopped when he stopped paying their school fees. I have all the receipts.

[00:14:15]>> He stopped paying the child support. He was told to pay. He refused to pay. The HMO pin I asked him to give me. He didn't give me.

[00:14:24]>> When where did you arrive at the child support?

[00:14:28]>> At um Ministry of Human Welfare. Do you have a copy of your Do you have a copy of it?

[00:14:35]>> I think please.

[00:14:39]>> So why did you stop?

[00:14:40]>> Yeah. Why I stop?

[00:14:41]>> Because of the access. So once you start having access to the children, you pick your responsibility.

[00:14:45]>> Yes ma'am.

[00:14:46]>> Okay.

[00:14:46]>> And another thing is another thing is that during that December >> one of our elder brother called me that he was trying to resolve the issue. Then after a while, I think the second day when I called him because the guy the guy asked me to call him again.

[00:15:02]>> This is not what I asked for >> said the terms of settlement at your mediation center.

[00:15:09]>> I don't have it here ma'am.

[00:15:10]>> Not even on your phone.

[00:15:11]>> I only have the conversation with the welfare the social work assigned.

[00:15:17]>> Don't worry just wait. So ma um our elder brother called me to come to abut so that he was trying to resolve the matter. So when I got there we spoke I left then the following they asked me to call him back maybe he must have talked to the to his people and so when I called back all of I don't know what they have said to him or because already I know he will not support me. So when I called him, he was trying to argue with me on the phone again like sh I said I said and I said okay let's forget about it. Then the next thing the guy would tell me is e we have money now and we will take care of your children. You will never see them again. I say okay fine if you want to help me you can go ahead and help me.

[00:16:04]>> Why are you asking for them now >> sir? Ma >> why are you asking for access to them now?

[00:16:08]>> Because he said I will never see my children >> and you agreed. Instead of you say no, I'll fight for my children >> because I cannot fight ma'am. I don't want to fight. I don't >> Can I say something to that?

[00:16:17]>> I don't need that fight.

[00:16:18]>> You stopped paying since April and my brother came home September.

[00:16:26]Throughout that April May, he paid only child support for April. May June, he didn't pay their school fees. July you didn't pay. My brother called him to come home that why why didn't you pay their school fees? Why didn't you send the child support? The evidence is secondary. You were not part of their conversation. So I only take whatever he says at that time >> is whatever your brother tells you. Do you understand? They spoke. Unless your brother is here to to contradict whatever he says.

[00:16:54]>> So I'm going to take it anyway. That's the brother.

[00:16:57]>> Brother or no brother. It's not your brother that give birth to these children. They your biological children.

[00:17:03]It's your responsibility, the two of you responsibility to rear them properly. So you start paying the school fees again.

[00:17:10]Okay. Right. Then the upkeep you agreed on at the mediation that you were paying before, how much is it?

[00:17:18]>> They said I should be paying 50,000 and I told >> you they said 70 not be truthful. How much have you been paying?

[00:17:25]>> 50,000 NRA but >> you have the audio recording here,000 >> of the agreement there.

[00:17:30]>> No, I don't.

[00:17:30]>> You don't have you don't have it. We stick to that 50. So you know what happens >> when you have the any the documents to prove that what was awarded at that mediation was more than 50.

[00:17:43]>> You can bring it to the legal team. They can review it.

[00:17:46]>> But right now stick to the 50 you've been as now say I cannot even afford that 50.

[00:17:51]>> Yes.

[00:17:51]>> These are your children. You have three children. You give birth to three children. You are giving them average of less than 20,000 NRA per month to feed them which cannot you know 60,000 can 20,000 NRA feed a child per month?

[00:18:04]>> No can't.

[00:18:05]>> Can it? Is she not the one subsidizing?

[00:18:08]Is she not already subsidized? Okay. If it's 1,000 NRA per plate. I keep I've said that several times today. That's 3,000 NRA per day. 1,000 for breakfast, 1,000 for lunch, 1,000 for dinner.

[00:18:22]3 by 30 that's 90,000 NR already per month you are giving 20 you still now less than 20K and you are still saying you can't give your child up to while the minimum ordinarily should be 30 that's at least one/ird per child do you understand what I'm saying so the bottom line is what you've I've been awarded with is a just stick to that and I can tell you from the last time that one was awarded till now, you know, the prices of things keeps going up and I'm not even reviewing that. I'm still sticking to that.

[00:19:06]Apparently, you've been paying 50 which is convenient for you. Why not keep on paying that 50 for now?

[00:19:11]>> Yeah, but because she stopped my access to the >> She did what?

[00:19:14]>> Because she stopped my >> She's going to give you access now. She I'm going to grant that order. She has to give you access. Don't interrupt me.

[00:19:21]You allow me to finish speaking, then you always respond. Do you understand?

[00:19:25]She's going to give you access.

[00:19:28]First of all, you know the children's school.

[00:19:31]>> Yeah, I know >> you do. You have a restricted access to the children in school. That's one. Then two, how often do you want to be seeing the children?

[00:19:41]>> If I can be seeing them like um twice in a month, I'm okay.

[00:19:45]>> Twice in a month. You live in Lagos?

[00:19:48]Yeah, I live in a but I work in Lagos.

[00:19:50]>> You work in Lagos. So you So okay. So when you are around, you want to see them twice a month?

[00:19:54]>> Yes, ma'am.

[00:19:55]>> What period? Weekends.

[00:19:57]>> Weekends mostly. Yes, ma'am.

[00:19:58]>> Two weekends in a month for him to see the children.

[00:20:02]>> That's not too much. He's not asking for too much.

[00:20:04]>> No, I can't I can't um stop him from seeing his >> All right then. So that's agreed upon.

[00:20:10]>> And is there any other issue?

[00:20:11]>> Yes. Another thing is I I I I've given those kids several phones so that I can be communicating with them. She like sometimes she will collect the phone.

[00:20:23]>> That's part of access. You must have access whether on phone whether physically >> you cannot my honor.

[00:20:29]>> Let me tell you what the law says is he who comes to equity must come with clean hands. I >> you want something from him you must be ready to do what is right as well.

[00:20:39]Whenever he calls, he wants to speak with the children. I might be out and I told him when I get home >> the phone. Where is the phone?

[00:20:48]>> I stopped the kids from using phone.

[00:20:50]>> You bought a phone for the children?

[00:20:52]>> Yes.

[00:20:52]>> 11 years old, right?

[00:20:54]>> He didn't buy a phone.

[00:20:56]>> I I once bought a phone. She >> He didn't buy a phone.

[00:20:58]>> She collected >> after that one. She's now using her phone. She now she >> Where is the phone he bought for the children?

[00:21:03]>> I don't know.

[00:21:04]>> It already that one is called it. So wait wait wait.

[00:21:11]At what time of the day is it convenient for you to make the children available to be speaking with him on daily basis?

[00:21:17]>> When they come back from school?

[00:21:18]>> What time?

[00:21:19]>> M 5.

[00:21:21]>> Between 5 to when?

[00:21:22]>> To 7.

[00:21:24]>> Between 5 to 7:00 p.m. How soon can you get another phone for the children?

[00:21:29]>> Yeah. Ah, as soon as I can. Tomorrow I can get them another phone.

[00:21:33]>> So you get another phone. Okay. What time do the children come back from school?

[00:21:38]>> The senior one comes by 4 while the junior one comes by 3:30.

[00:21:43]>> So when the senior one comes in that one is 11 years old.

[00:21:46]>> Yes.

[00:21:47]>> Can switch off the phone by 5.

[00:21:49]>> Do you understand?

[00:21:52]And um that you can supervise that but don't deny him.

[00:21:57]>> No say to speak with them or see them.

[00:22:00]>> My honor me.

[00:22:02]>> It's your honor. I'm sorry. Please help me tell him to stop asking those kids.

[00:22:09]How many men came to see your mom or things like that? I don't like it at all. He asks the boy, >> the boy comes home to ask me that my mom mommy my daddy said he now is lie.

[00:22:23]>> So listen to me. You've heard that now.

[00:22:25]Do you understand?

[00:22:27]>> So if that had happened before, let it be the last time.

[00:22:32]Your son report those thing again.

[00:22:34]Record it. Bring the evidence to the legal team.

[00:22:36]>> It has never even >> such conversations with that many men.

[00:22:40]That's your own business. It's not my business.

[00:22:42]>> That is it. So what else? You mentioned yours. She's mentioning her. So >> HMO the the pin.

[00:22:48]>> How would they assess the HMO for the children or you want to you want to them to be going to hospital that you be paying money?

[00:22:54]>> I can give her the pin.

[00:22:55]>> You give her today. So you get that one.

[00:22:57]>> Not today. Not today. Maybe later.

[00:22:59]>> When? When? You have to be specific.

[00:23:00]He's on his phone.

[00:23:01]>> Listen, >> he's not.

[00:23:03]>> You want to preside over your case or I throw out your case?

[00:23:05]>> As she is.

[00:23:06]>> You can't keep on interjecting me.

[00:23:08]>> She is.

[00:23:10]>> You are not better either.

[00:23:14]>> Two of a kind. I'm listening.

[00:23:17]>> You so provide it for you give it to the legal team today before you leave.

[00:23:21]>> The pin.

[00:23:21]>> The pin. The legal team will have it today and they will give it to you.

[00:23:26]>> That is you must get it today.

[00:23:29]>> Okay. So make sure the legal team gets it today and you obtain it from the legal team latest by tomorrow so they can be using it for your children.

[00:23:39]>> Okay.

[00:23:40]>> Okay. What else is outstanding? One more thing again ma if he should start paying the school fees he should make it frequent and on time because we had issue back then he didn't pay the >> you know what >> you know the school >> h I know the my first son I don't >> take him to all the schools >> yes >> so it will take you to the school get the details from the school directly >> okay >> pay to the school directly >> okay >> and once you make the payment copier.

[00:24:12]>> Okay.

[00:24:13]>> Once you get it sent it to the legal team.

[00:24:17]Do you understand me?

[00:24:19]>> So that's the that's the process the procedure you'll be taking export for pay the school fees.

[00:24:26]Make the children's allowance available to them.

[00:24:29]>> Give her the make the pin for the available today so that the children can use the facility.

[00:24:36]>> Okay.

[00:24:37]>> So what else again?

[00:24:38]>> Give him access. I will.

[00:24:41]>> You wants them, you want to be having them at least twice a month. I told you to stop interjecting me. That's why two of you have problem.

[00:24:50]>> Access to the children twice a month.

[00:24:54]That's what he wants for now, right?

[00:24:57]What else is outstanding?

[00:24:59]>> Nothing.

[00:25:01]>> Is there any other thing outstanding?

[00:25:06]Judge Fumi helps both parties to reach amicable settlement. In the interest of the children's welfare, she refers the couple to a counseling expert specializing in co-parenting. After the break, judge for me rules. Okay, this is my ruling.

[00:25:27]The plaintiff is to make the children of the marriage available to the defendant two weekends in a month. The defendant is to pay the school fees of the children of the marriage.

[00:25:42]Make the receipt of payment available to the plaintiff who will pass it on to the legal team of the justice court.

[00:25:50]The defendant is to make available the sum of 50,000 naira for the upkeep of the children paid to the plaintiff on monthly basis upward until this is revealed and it's to further that's the defendant is to further provide the pin for the HMO for the plaintiff so that this can be used for the medical welfare of the children.

[00:26:20]This is my ruling. Additionally, the plaintiff are the defendants. They are to go for co-arenting classes.

[00:26:31]Work it out with them. You have to go for at least six sessions. I rise.

[00:26:36]That's my >> All right.

[00:26:41]If your baby daddy is denying paternity of the child to avoid upkeep or you suspect misattributed paternity situations, submit your case online at www.thejusticecort.com the justice court.com for a prompt resolution of the matter.

[00:27:23]Hey,