The rise of independent horror marks a vital disruption where raw, visceral authenticity finally exposes the creative bankruptcy of Hollywood’s risk-averse formulas. It demonstrates that genuine terror is born from unconstrained ingenuity rather than the predictable safety of corporate production.
Deep Dive
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Deep Dive
Heather returns with a Cursed Death WhistleAdded:
Wow, our real host is back.
>> Wow, >> you've changed again.
>> Leaving us for years.
>> I listen >> out in the cold.
>> The last time wasn't my fault. Delta completely screwed me.
>> Yeah, >> it was definitely Delta's fault. They delayed my flight by like a whole day. I didn't even I didn't sleep. I had to lay on the airport floor. They changed my gate like 900 times. And then when I finally did get back, it was like 11:00 a.m. instead of supposedly it was supposed to be midnight the night before.
>> What do you think? Is it just like plane in like internal plane issues that usually >> air conditioning wasn't working on the plane? Which to be fair, I would rather them fix the [ __ ] than, you know, spiral and die.
>> Oh, well, sure. Yeah.
>> Like cuz if the air conditioning is not working, what else is not working? Yeah, >> but like we sat there on the the tarmac for a good like hour before we deplaned.
>> The last time that happened to me, I was heading to Shot Show year before last and I was in I had a connection. I had a weird connection and I got I was at my [ __ ] gate. We were ready to board and then apparently as one they were deplaning some woman [ __ ] herself and then dribbled [ __ ] all the way up the aisle on the way out.
>> Oh no.
>> So >> that must have smelled horrible.
>> Yeah. Apparently. So like literally as they were like either as they were landing or something, some woman just [ __ ] herself and dribbled it in the whole aisle >> like like a like a How old was this woman?
>> I don't know. Oh, she's probably drunk as [ __ ] or some [ __ ] >> They don't hand out pamphlets about that.
>> They don't give me a picture. Here's the Here's the [ __ ] [ __ ] Here she is.
Here's the one who [ __ ] the whole plane.
>> Well, I don't know cuz it's like the [ __ ] out of her.
>> I would I would I would grab the [ __ ] [ __ ] and throw her if I found out she cuz my flight was like gone. They were like, "We can't even use this plane.
Like, we got to [ __ ] we got to send this to the plane dump scene clean.
>> We're not even cleaning this plane.
We're throwing it out. bring it to the plane graveyard and we're getting a new plane. But they were like, "It's going to be a five hour." I was like, "How?" I was like, "You've got a million planes here. How can just back this one up, bring the other one over?" But uh so I literally just booked a whole different flight that left in like 30 minutes while I was there. I was like, "Fuck this." I was like, "I'm looking." Oh, what do you know? One leaves in 30 minutes. I'm going on that one.
>> Yeah. And there was just seats available.
>> Yeah.
>> Huh.
>> Yeah.
>> Yeah. I was just wondering like the age cuz it's like was this a drunk [ __ ] Was she like scenile?
>> Yeah. Was she like >> like how mad can I do I have to be?
>> Yeah. Like if it's an old [ __ ] and you know like her you know years and years of butthole usage, it's not it's not as pristine and tight as it used to be. So sometimes [ __ ] dribbles out.
>> Especially if you're using that exit as an entrance.
>> Exactly. Yeah. Maybe old [ __ ] that loved anal and like you know can't hate her for it.
>> There's an old old anal biker [ __ ] >> Yeah. Hell yeah. That's a new a cool new username. old anal biker [ __ ] >> 85 >> 85 >> 85.
>> But yeah, that I hate that [ __ ] I hate plane inconveniences.
>> I know that it's like, oh, wo is me, but like I hate that [ __ ] >> No, it sucks, dude. Every time I fly out of Missoula, Montana, it's just a nightmare. It's cuz it's the world's smallest airport. Every if something can it will go wrong. There's been multiple trips that I've gotten to the airport and it was like already like frustrating me over like [ __ ] like the say like the airport was like full. So like the parking so I was like a [ __ ] to find parking finally find a place after you know running around for an hour get through everything. Get there my flight gets delayed by like 3 or 4 hours. I'm just I just go home. I was like I'm I'm done. This trip this trip that I'm going on this work trip or whatever it's it's canceled now. I'm going home. [ __ ] all of it. I'm infuriated. Uh I'm not dealing with it. I'm just I was like, I'll go home. I'll catch the next trip.
>> Well, I I did something similar the last time I was with >> gave the old college try. We tried.
>> Like one time they like delayed the flight by 3 hours. I was like, nope. And I called Laura and I was like, I'm spending another day with you, [ __ ] She was like, "Okay."
>> Yeah.
>> But yeah, I was uh at that point it was >> from a flight from Missoula into Salt Lake City. So I was stuck in [ __ ] Salt Lake City >> where you can't drink past >> 8:30. All the bars closed at 8, so I'm just like I'm like, "What am I supposed to do? What do you do in airports? You just drink or I guess try to sleep on the floor."
>> Oh, >> I don't know. It was a nightmare.
Anyways, the trip was fun, though.
>> Yeah. Yeah, >> it was really Okay, I found my very first ever moose paddle, >> which I have right here.
>> That's pretty sick.
>> For those of you that are witnessing with your eyeballs, got into a huge [ __ ] argument with everyone on the internet who was like, "That's not that's not a moose paddle. That's a that's an elk shed."
>> Yeah.
>> Like, okay, cool.
>> Um Was it grown by a moose or an elk?
>> This is a moose.
>> Well, then it can't be a [ __ ] elk anything.
>> Yeah, that's what I said.
>> Jesus, internet, come on.
>> No, every single dude, it was like it was dozens of people and then the comments were like getting liked >> by so many people of people being like, "Well, you can't fix stupid, but that's an elk shed." I'm like, "Dude, I've been doing this for years." Like, if if that was an elkshed, it would be very painfully obvious. This is a a [ __ ] juvenile moose. and where I found it was very moussey anyway. Moose [ __ ] everywhere.
But yeah, no, the palmation there, it's just starting to get like get going.
It's starting to be like an adult moose here.
>> But yeah, that was crazy arguing with 900 people about what kind of shed I found and what I do.
>> Sure. Yeah, >> for fun with Laura.
>> I get it. Like uh cuz they can look like similar, especially like younger ones.
So, I get it. Like people that don't know, >> people are saying it with their whole chest like you're not not even just saying like, "Hey, by the way," they were like, "You're an idiot." I'm like, "Oh my god, >> that'd be like me trying to tell you how to lift [ __ ] but hey, hey, Caleb, can let's fix your form while you're lifting shit." That's the equivalent.
>> Well, I mean, that does happen all of the time. Anytime I post any kind of lifting video, I'll have like some dude who weighs like 90 lbs in the my message being like, "Hey, you should try you should really try doing it this way."
And like I'll just like look at like I don't I never respond but I'll just like look at them and I'm just like >> please please >> don't give advice to people that are doing like better than you in like are more experienced in your thing. And not to say I'm like not some expert in [ __ ] working out and [ __ ] Like there's plenty of [ __ ] I [ __ ] up on or can do better at, but like I would never go out of my way to give someone who's like obviously doing a thing much better than me like try and give them advice.
Yeah.
>> Yeah. You got to have a pretty big caveat in there. Like, I am a medical professional specifically trained in exactly this thing.
>> I would like to provide advice.
>> Now, I'll listen to you. Yeah. Here's my degree. Yeah.
>> The Tik Tok that I recently scrolled off of says you're doing it wrong.
>> Yeah. That's it. Yeah. You the [ __ ] online degrees from watching videos and stuff.
>> Yeah, that was the equivalent for me.
I'm like, I have a bear guide, wildlife photographer, and survivalist all telling me these are this is a [ __ ] moose paddle, but they're wrong.
>> Yeah. And you random internet person, you're right.
>> A certificate of au authenticity signed by Mr. Moose. We did a moose. We did a DNA test or was it Bullwinkle?
>> Yeah.
>> Yeah. Co-signed by Rocky, >> dude. Yeah, it was pretty crazy. But I I did some blacksmithing for the first time.
>> Oh, that's fun.
>> Yeah. Um, this used to be a horseshoe and now it could potentially be a murder weapon.
>> That's a prostate extractor. A what now?
>> Prostate extractor.
>> Extractor. Yeah. You just you just kind of >> get it in, twist on when you got it hooked, and give it a tug.
>> Yeah.
>> This is a >> It It's It looks like a a giant metal candy cane almost.
>> Are you going to suck it?
>> No.
>> Oh, okay.
>> No. No.
>> It's like a little treat when you're low on >> No, I don't think so.
>> Was that the plan when you started hammering on steel? Um, so I I didn't expect it to be easy, but I severely underestimated like how much like my back was aching the next day. Like all the muscles in my back from like hammering this [ __ ] It's This took me like an hour.
>> Yeah, >> it I mean >> I can already see all the comments now from the knife makers and the blacksmiths out there. It's just like, yeah, the hammer part sucks ass.
>> Yeah.
>> Yeah. there. Well, they have like new fangled ways of doing it, but I did it like the old school way where you stick it in the like in the hot coals and then you pull it out and then you like are using like um >> tongs and hammers to twist it around and [ __ ] So, >> it I mean for my first time it's not bad.
>> Yeah.
>> Yeah. Give me like >> 49 years 364 more days, you know? I'm 50 years from now I'll be >> okay.
>> Good.
>> Okay. No, you're going to blow your back up.
>> I'll be as good as Donnie. I think he will be dead actually. Maybe.
>> Well, I hope so.
>> Yeah.
>> I feel like in 50 That's 50 years is too much for me.
>> What is the ideal dying age?
>> Uh as soon as you can't wipe your own ass.
>> Yeah.
>> Yep.
>> If I don't if I'm uh if I have dementia, Alzheimer's, I can't wipe my own ass.
>> Um >> I fall and break a hip. I can't move around. I can't pick [ __ ] and put it back. Pick it pick it up and put it back down.
>> Yeah. Well, that's you already. Like if I've got some if I've got some dementia but I can still do [ __ ] and like live >> fine. But if it's like so bad that I'm like [ __ ] [ __ ] up, definitely put me down.
>> But as soon as I have to have somebody wiping my butt [ __ ] smother me.
>> Well, how would you want to be put down?
>> I mean, uh, you know, well, I don't know what the laws are, but uh, you know, just inject me with something, put it in my IV bag, and tend me to sleep.
>> Yeah. Go out like a man's best friend.
Yeah.
>> Oh, I always just thought like, you know, you you get in your car, you shut the garage door, you turn on the car, and then you go to sleep.
>> Well, I want somebody else to do it to me.
>> Oh, >> yeah.
>> Yeah.
>> Why?
>> Cuz then then I'm not committing suicide. Technically, someone's doing it for me.
>> Yeah, but you've given them permission.
>> Killing me.
>> Is that not technically suicide? Or I guess you can't say that.
>> Yeah, we could stop saying the s word.
Not >> my bad. Uh, I think we could say like euthan Asia though. That is euthanasia.
>> Yeah. Yeah.
>> Yeah.
>> Okay.
>> Just send me home. Me on home.
>> That's >> That's so sad.
>> Me that.
>> Would you have like a a prep week where you like kind of wrap things up?
>> I mean, if I was able I probably I mean, if I'm already having people wipe my ass, I'm probably not going to be able to take care of much.
>> That's true.
>> I'm probably not really going to be able to do anything other than lay there and let people wipe my I'm going to be just very humiliated for the last few days of my life. uh like just waiting to be put down.
>> It's like no hookers and blow.
>> Not if I have a dirty [ __ ] ass. No. That I can't wipe myself. And I'm And I'm assuming >> at that point you just feel bad for the hookers.
>> Yeah. At that point, like my winger is probably not working correctly. I'm probably not horny.
>> Um Oh, that's true.
>> Yeah. I'm probably just very sad and or out of my mind. Who knows?
>> Yeah.
>> Just go ahead and just put me out. Throw me out the window or some [ __ ] I don't know.
>> Oh, it's like Danny Devito. Just throw me in the trash.
>> Yeah, put me in the [ __ ] trash, dude.
>> Oh, just funerals and Well, a funeral I get your friends want to gather around and say their last goodbye, but like >> caskets and burials and burial plots and >> Yeah.
>> how much it costs to get embedded when they're just going to melt you down to ash anyways. Like, >> yeah, >> trash cans are [ __ ] right there.
>> A landfield of dead bodies.
>> Or like the tree thing. They like put you in like a compost capsule thing and you can grow into a tree. I never seen >> that has like a purpose to it. Yeah.
>> Yeah. I like that. That's That's cute.
>> Yeah.
>> I never saw people who did like photo shoots at funerals. Have you seen that where people like gather around the casket and they all take pictures and [ __ ] >> I've never heard that. It sounds >> Oh, I've seen it. It's weird.
>> I've told people uh that I was a wedding and divorce photographer once though.
>> Oh [ __ ] >> Yeah. Like when we were down in Florida, uh I would shoot weddings or whatever and I was like, "And I also have a special if you prepay for the divorce.
It's way cheaper."
>> Saves saves for whenever you think this divorce is going to happen. What?
>> Oh god.
>> I mean, and they should have too cuz maybe it was because I was shooting weddings that were primarily military people in their like 20s.
>> True.
>> But like >> I want to say 80% of the weddings I shot are now divorced. It would have to. I mean, military doesn't really have a good They're getting married when their brain isn't even developed yet >> at all.
>> Yeah.
>> They're literally just getting married so they can live in the same house.
>> Yeah. So they can get some benefits, >> which sure, smart uh to a degree.
>> It's smart if that's your plan.
>> Yeah.
>> If you're going into it thinking with your tiny little >> adult brain that this is the love of your life, >> probably not.
>> Yeah. I mean, like obviously you can't tell nobody that. You're like, "No, you don't know [ __ ] about love yet." They're like, "Yes, I do. I feel it in my heart." Well, you're like, "Well, you'll see." I think we've all made those mistakes.
>> You'll see. You'll see.
>> I mean, but that goes for anyone, though.
>> Sure.
>> If you I don't understand people who like meet someone, they get engaged 3 months later, they're married 3 months later. It's like, dude, you have to >> you have to walk through the trenches with this [ __ ] You got to live with them.
>> Yeah. Like, [ __ ] finish a game of Monopoly at least, >> right?
>> Yeah. sake.
>> I understood it in the military cuz there was >> that barrier of like you can't test drive this person living with them if you're in the barracks. So >> true. Okay.
>> You marry them so you can live in the same house together essentially.
>> Okay.
>> But if you don't have those kind of stipulations in your life like >> outside of they really need healthcare and your job offers it like I just don't see the rush.
>> Yeah.
>> Yeah.
>> It's [ __ ] wild.
>> Yeah. It happens.
>> It happens. What ifs?
>> They have a a chapel in um in Vegas and it's Taco Bell themed.
>> That's kind of >> I wonder how many people have gotten married there just planned it instead of on a whim.
>> Probably a bunch. Yeah, >> probably a bunch.
>> Yeah, cuz I think there's a lot of people out there like myself where like the actual ceremony is kind of a [ __ ] joke.
>> Sure.
>> So, might as well make the joke funny.
>> Yeah, >> sure.
>> [ __ ] yeah. Baja Blast Fountain or something. Yeah, >> it'd be sick.
>> [ __ ] yeah.
>> [ __ ] yeah, dude.
>> I love that. It' >> be cool. And especially if your family hates it. Those are just less meals you have to buy at the reception.
>> That's very true.
>> I mean, Taco Bell did get [ __ ] crazy expensive since the 2000s. But >> yeah, as everything has.
>> Taco Bell has no right. They're that like small tacos. They're making them more expensive and the food is smaller for sure. Yeah. Like Taco Bell and Waterburger can [ __ ] right off with their prices.
>> They're overvalued.
>> My like my first like real like relationship >> uh my girlfriend worked at Taco Bell and like that was like a a a fun like prop or uh what what's the what's the word?
>> Perk.
>> Perk. Yeah. Uh cuz she would take like the the huge wraps and just make me like the [ __ ] most gigantic burritos. Oh, [ __ ] >> I was like, "This is awesome."
Anytime like she'd get off work, she'd have me like a [ __ ] five pound burrito. I was like, "Hell yeah.
[ __ ] yeah."
>> So, that was fun. But that was like I And people a lot of people talk about Taco Bell [ __ ] them up.
>> It doesn't [ __ ] me up.
>> It used to me and I think about I'm like I'm at a Taco Bell in southern West Virginia though.
>> That is accurate.
>> You're getting the [ __ ] like lowest of the grade meats. This is dog food. U and it used to like Yeah, it would like I could eat it and literally before I left Taco Bell, I'm spraying diarrhea.
>> Uh >> that's never happened to me.
>> And so I used to have like a bad uh association with it. I was like man I was like Taco Bell like I can't [ __ ] with it. It just like it [ __ ] me up. I was like maybe Mexican computer just [ __ ] me up like you know stupid small town brain. Then once I started going other places and eating Taco Bell, like oh this is delightful. I enjoy this and it does not make me spray.
>> Yeah. So, turns out my Taco Bell was just was grinding up cats full of rats.
Yeah. Yeah. They had they were just getting psums out of the back.
>> No, not the >> It's so weird that the semi that says Taco Bell on it never comes through here.
>> Yeah. It's weird. There's just a a box truck that says possums on it. And there's every week there's a box truck that has a big picture of a possum on it. It pulls into Taco Bell. I don't know what they're doing, but boy, this place [ __ ] my stomach up.
I guess I'll eat there though cuz it was cheap and I was a child with not much money. So, >> how old were you when you were dating this Taco Bell?
>> 17, 18. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
>> It was like senior year of high school.
>> Oh, yeah. Have you ever been to uh They don't exist now, I don't think, but the the Ken Taco Huts.
>> The what now?
>> Oh, yes. So, they're all >> They're like in gas stations, too. Dude, it's [ __ ] awesome.
>> Um, I never saw someone at the gas station.
>> Oh, dude. But there was one in my hometown. Uh, it's a Ken Taco Hut.
Kentucky Fried Chicken, Taco Bell, and Pizza Hut.
>> All right. You go inside this big building and they're all right next to each other.
>> Yep.
>> If you have a friend that works there, >> oh, that like the first time I went to one, it was some stoner guy that was working the register as they should.
>> And I was like, "Oh man, I have so many choices. I don't know what to choose."
Like kind of jokingly, he's like, "Can I blow your mind for you? Are you gonna mix all [ __ ] together?
>> Yes, please.
>> He basically started with like uh I call them like the Kentucky Fried Chicken, like poverty bowls. It's just like the mashed potato bowl with chicken and a whole bunch of stuff.
>> Yeah, >> but he threw like taco ingredients in too.
>> Oh [ __ ] >> [ __ ] They should have promoted that guy.
>> Yeah, that's that's awesome.
>> First time I ever saw one of those, we were on one of our road trips and it was like, you know, early. I was young as [ __ ] like 23, 24, something like that.
And we were at a it was like a gigantic gas station and it was late. It was like midnight or something. That's why we were like so we're like what? Like you go into this gigantic gas station next to the highway. You go in the gas station side that has like, you know, it's like a loves or some [ __ ] that has like all like they sell [ __ ] suits of armor and swords and [ __ ] at a gas station. It's wild. And then you go into this big like ballroom with all these tables and [ __ ] and then there's Kentucky Fried Chicken, Taco Bell, and Pizza Hut all just like right there. And we were like, "What the fuck?" So, I remember I got like uh one of the many personal pizzas and uh like a couple quesadillas like this [ __ ] rules. But yeah, that was my first encounter with one and it was like late as night at night and Oh, it was awesome.
>> Yeah, it's like >> do I need a side slice of pizza?
>> I kind of do. They've got personal pans ready to go with your bucket of chicken.
What the [ __ ] Yes.
>> Do I want a cheesy crust taco? Yes, >> actually. I [ __ ] do, >> dude. Me being from Kentucky, I never got into like Kentucky Fried Chicken or Pizza Hut. I miss the aesthetic of Pizza Hut. Like I get very nostalgic.
>> Did you see the new CEO or whatever Pizza Hut is changing them all back >> to the to the hut?
>> Yeah. To the hut. And they're supposed to be getting all the old decor with like the lamps. I want to buy one of those O like OG lamps so bad.
>> They have the [ __ ] chandeliers on eBay. Uh that I was like, dude, I like I could change all three of my bar lights.
It would be [ __ ] >> Is it like hella expensive? Yeah, they're like 400 bucks a piece and I was like >> I mean worth it kind of >> would be I would bring those everywhere like >> Yeah. [ __ ] put make a video out of it. Tax right >> up. Yeah. Yeah.
>> [ __ ] yeah.
>> Yeah. It's going to be in videos. But boy, what a what a nice vibe that would I just turned my kitchen into an old t uh Pizza Hut.
>> You should definitely do that.
>> It's like the cups. Yeah, >> I've got the cups. Dude, I heard that uh Pizza Hut was one of the main um buyers of kale specifically for the salad bar and they weren't I mean Oh, >> wasn't it just decoration?
>> Yeah, it was just Yeah. And then it was that that was another thing. Uh so the demand for kale got so huge because of Pizza Huts. And then once they got rid of that bar, they had this abundance of it and they're like, "Well, I guess we'll just sell kale for people to eat, I guess." And then and then Heather's like, "Yeah, I'll buy it."
>> No, >> let's just tell these stupid [ __ ] it's healthy.
>> Yeah. And so they're getting like chips and [ __ ] of it.
They're like, "What do we do with all this leftover Pizza Hut like decor?"
"Well, we can turn it into chips and white [ __ ] will eat it and they're like, "Yeah." And >> cook it next to the seaweed.
>> Yeah. Yeah. This episode, as well as pretty much every episode for quite some time now, is sponsored by Firecracker Farm. We love this guy. It is just one guy and his family in Florida growing peppers, infusing it with salt. All the manufacturing is done in house with his family. You can't get more Americanmade than this, and he's been supporting us and our causes for a while now. Best of all, his product is really, really good.
If you want a little bit of extra kick on your food, whether it's eggs, it's steak, it's fish, it's literally, you can put this on anything. Highly recommend out of all the sponsors that have worked with us, if you're going to give your money to somebody, give it to Alex over at firecracker.farm.
You can even use our code milk to save some money. It's I don't know what percentage it goes up, it goes down. I think it's a good month right now. Uh, but go over there, check out the site.
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All kinds of different hotness levels and flavors that he infuses into this stuff. It's super good stuff. Give it a try. We love it. I think you're going to love it. Uh let's get back to the show.
This episode is brought to you by Lucy.
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>> I tried to cook uh kale chips once and I failed miserably. They were like weird textured. It was just like goo.
>> Yeah.
>> It wasn't kale goo.
>> Yeah. I was like, no.
>> It did not work out well for me cuz like parmesan kale chips are pretty decent.
Or like cheese. You put cheese on them.
A fun little snack of nothingness. Yeah, I get it. Yeah.
>> Yeah. It's like if you're like an orally fixated person and you don't want to shove donuts or pizza or fried chicken into your face all day.
>> Sure.
>> A kale chip.
>> Yeah.
>> Yeah. That's why gummy bears exist.
Those are healthy.
>> Yeah.
>> Gummy bears.
>> Yeah.
>> It's sugar.
>> It's a bear.
>> It's a bear.
>> No, >> it's protein.
>> It's cute.
>> No, I don't think that's how that works.
>> You get your glycogen in or whatever it is.
>> Glocken.
>> Yeah, whatever it is.
Glycogen, glycogen, whatever it is. It's something that's in gummies. Yeah, >> it's the energy the body runs off of.
>> Yeah, it is. It's something. There's like it's huge in like the bodybuilder world. They all like after their workouts or during their workouts, they're popping like gummy bears and [ __ ] >> The sugar-free ones make you [ __ ] yourself.
>> That's true. The Black Forest especially.
>> Really?
>> Or >> is that a sound effect or is that like what?
>> No, it's just like the sugar-free ones.
Like it's really funny if you read some of the reviews on sugar-free gummy bears. It's all people complaining about like >> I keep [ __ ] >> Yeah, >> he's out.
>> Like you ate the whole bag, dude. Like >> I ate the whole bag and then I [ __ ] Yeah, that'll happen with >> tiny little [ __ ] bears >> with [ __ ] goo goo bears that you're eating.
Uh what was I just talking about before the glocken? [ __ ] There was something that was leading into with that.
>> It'll come to me.
>> Okay. I I bought something or I didn't buy something. I was I didn't buy it. I got I got sent stuff. Yeah.
>> Do you want to see what it is?
>> Yeah.
>> Okay. It's an Aztec death whistle.
>> And you've brought it to us.
>> Yeah. Look it. It's got like crazy like gold weird creepy etchings on the bottom with some metal and you blow into it and it sounds horrific. Allegedly.
>> Go ahead and do it.
>> No. Do you want to do it?
>> You can do it. It's yours. It's This is your bird. It is meant for the owner.
>> Are you superstitious though?
>> No. I just, you know, there's warnings on some things in life and it the name of that is a warning.
>> Yeah. This doesn't have any warnings on it though, so I feel like it's safe.
>> Children's toy.
>> You're looking at his butthole. What does that little inscription and coin looking thing?
>> It's got a skull on the bottom with some some gold and some like emerald looking precious metals.
>> Let me hold this for a second. Let me see how >> blow into it. Give it a go. Well, >> it's got some good craftsmanship.
>> It got some like the the bag has some crazy designs on it, too.
>> Not a good sign, either.
>> Yeah, it was tied with some string.
>> And where did you acquire this whistle of death?
>> Uh, Sally, one of uh our listeners.
>> Oh, I mean, >> we did just get done watching that whistle movie.
>> Yeah.
>> The horror movie where uh anyone who blows into the whistle dies.
>> Yeah. Anybody that hears it dies.
>> Oh, yeah. Yeah, that that part.
>> There you go.
>> More more.
>> It'll scare the [ __ ] out of the dog, though.
>> Yeah, cuz it doesn't want to die.
>> Yeah, dogs.
>> Can you imagine? Oh, the first I feel like I want to go deep into the woods like kind of on the outskirts where some people could kind of hear me and I just want to like scare the [ __ ] out of people with this >> and just curse them all.
>> Well, I don't I It'd be funny >> to curse them and curse them to death.
>> It'd be really funny if like you thought you were making some really scary noises, but instead people were just like, "What the [ __ ] is that? A duck?"
Oh god.
>> Doesn't it sound like like a like a a mountain lion screaming >> is? Yeah, >> I think.
>> Yeah.
>> I mean, they all might sound different, but >> Yeah.
>> I don't know.
>> Yeah. Give it like a a wee blow.
>> I'm a little superstitious.
>> Yeah, but it's yours now. So, what are you going to do with it? Just look at it.
>> I don't know. It said the box. It said it was like, "Thanks for supporting a small business." And I threw the box out and now I wish I wouldn't have cuz I wish I could read some fine print on there.
>> Please God, don't blow this. Do you think it's like a self-fulfilling prophecy though? Like it's a perfectly like innocent thing and then you get it in your head like I've blown the death whistle so then you like >> die because you >> you get so scared of how the death whistle is going to kill you that you just do the job yourself.
>> Yeah. You become careless.
>> Maybe you can blow it and see what happens.
>> I don't want to.
>> You do it.
>> I'm not doing it. It's yours. No, it could be. It's all of ours.
>> No, that's yours.
>> It belongs to all of us equally.
>> That's for you to blow.
>> I don't think that's real.
>> Maybe just like set it next to a fan.
See if it does anything.
>> Yeah. If you're not the one that blows it and just plug your ears. You don't blow it or hear it.
>> Well, I want to hear it. I just don't want to do it.
>> Yeah.
>> I need to I need to do some digging into what this is. Peter, make him blow on it.
>> Yeah. Where the [ __ ] is Peter said?
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Get Peter in. He's expendable. Hey.
>> Hey, Peter, if you can blow this really quick.
Let's just plug our ears.
>> Do you go in like the next room and blow that really quick?
>> Why is everybody wearing pill doors while I blow on this whistle? I >> just want to see what happens.
>> Yeah, >> he just explodes. Uh, it does work.
[ __ ] >> [ __ ] >> Oh, we need another Peter.
>> Damn it.
>> Well, yeah. Whenever you're too old to wipe your own butthole, you can just blow into the death whistle.
>> That >> cuz technically it's not suicide or es sorry, euthanasia. It's technically, you know, you're >> a demon comes to get me or whatever.
Death. Death comes to get me.
>> No.
>> Oh, what if a demon does come and he's like, "Oh, a poopy one.
>> A you stink, man. I don't want you. I'm just laying there decrepit in a [ __ ] hospital bed, please." He's like, "Oh, no. What am I going to do with you?"
>> That would suck.
>> You're not worth anything.
>> Yeah. You're not going to be fun to torture.
>> Now I got to [ __ ] make a trip to the dump. This is sucks.
>> Yeah. Imagine being rejected by a demon.
He's like, "No, yucky.
I don't want to possess you. You're gross."
>> Yeah. That's the ultimate form of rejection right there.
>> Yeah.
>> You just can't die cuz no demon will take you.
>> Yeah. Not anymore.
>> Or the grim reaper's just like, >> I guess.
>> Calling in sick for the rest of the day.
I don't really want to take you anywhere. On my boat.
>> On my boat. Cross what? The river sticks. You're going to stink the boat up. You got [ __ ] in my boat, you piece of [ __ ] old man. [ __ ] He just pushes you into the river.
>> All right, we're done.
>> I mean, that that movie was pretty good, though.
>> Obsession or the movie?
>> Oh, Obsession was fantastic. My new I was going to say the West. Yeah, that was pretty good, dude. Yeah, it had some pretty gruesome scenes in it that I was not prepared for.
>> That one was decent.
>> Yeah, >> but Obsession, we watched Obsession a couple nights ago. is one of my new favorite movies of all time.
>> Yeah, it's really really good.
>> It's fantastic. There's little details, too. Um I don't know, spoiler, I guess. I was reading that um in the the last scene >> where she's she has Sarah's tattoo and she's wearing her dress and she >> her hair. Yeah, her hair.
>> Crazy.
>> Yeah, like her hairstyle or her hair.
She cut her scalp off and put it on.
Yeah, >> it's it is wild. It's such a fresh new concept. They love it. And apparently Curry Barker's also just finished filming that other one with Aaron Paul.
>> Oh, really? They already filmed it >> apparently is what I read. Just crazy.
>> I know. He's talking about doing more movies of the, you know, the the Willow.
>> Talking about possibly doing a series of it. That would be awesome.
>> It's so interesting to see how many like YouTube and like internet comedians transition. so seamlessly into the horror genre.
>> [ __ ] crush it.
>> Yeah.
>> Oh, cool.
>> Like the back rooms dude Kane uh parts something like he did all of like the Back Rooms YouTube videos and now he's just doing a whole movie. It's like crazy.
>> But it's giving me hope for the horror genre.
>> Yeah. Well, I mean it's literally it's what they've been talking about forever.
The internet creators are becoming the new >> because Hollywood sucks. like celebrities and like movie producers and stuff. Yeah.
>> Hollywood's just doing the same [ __ ] over and over again and recreating.
>> We should make another superhero, >> right? Well, yeah, cuz Hollywood they're betting millions and millions of dollars.
>> Yeah.
>> On a concept that pretty much better [ __ ] work. So, they play it safe.
They make reboots and sequels and all this kind of stuff.
>> Uh so, all the original ideas are coming from the space where you can afford to fail.
>> Yeah. The original creators. Yeah.
>> Yeah. Wasn't there uh the Obsession budget was like 700,000 or something? It was under a million >> and it's like crushing >> the box office right now. They said that nothing has done this since uh Paranormal Activity.
>> Oh yeah. I would have guessed Blair Witch that blew up when it was new.
>> Oh yeah.
>> Yeah. But this the last one I think they were saying was the Paranormal Activity was like 2009 or something.
>> Okay.
>> But yeah, on the on that budget I think was crazy. What they put the Blair Witch people through was insane. the they basically dropped all the actors off and gave them a loose script and just [ __ ] with them and made them all like think they were going crazy. The main girl um who played Heather in the film, she said at one point she was so terrified she actually thought she'd signed up to be in a snuff film and she thought they were going to kill her.
>> It was so like a lot of their reactions in Blair Witch were just like real reactions. They're like we're just going to put you in the woods. Here's a loose concept of what we're doing. And like that end scene where the dude is standing in the corner.
>> Yeah.
>> And they they had to refilm that I think another time or two because she was hyperventilating so bad >> cuz she thought she was actually going to die.
>> Yeah.
>> It's crazy.
I like that. It's a little bit of method acting there.
>> I like that.
>> I mean, I'm just looking this Heather person up. Her real name is Ray Hance.
Haven't seen her in anything. So, she's probably actually just a shitty actress, but she wasn't acting that time cuz they just scared the [ __ ] out of her for real.
>> Yeah. Or she's just so traumatized.
She's like, "I'm never doing film ever again."
>> That could be a two.
>> That's crazy though. Like, how many like that shot >> for $35,000?
>> 35.
>> I mean, in >> I mean, >> 1999 money, so >> Okay, >> call it 100,000 now.
>> Yeah, >> sure.
>> Yeah, >> that's still crazy. We could do that.
>> Yeah.
I mean, we have a couple concepts for things we've talked about for a while.
>> Yeah.
>> That would be really fun to do.
>> Yeah. I'm I'm like 100% invested in doing a YouTube horror short.
>> Yeah.
>> This year, even if I have to spend all my own money >> Yeah.
>> hiring people. But I want to hire like a legit child actor for one, which probably have to be out of like Austin or something. But >> yeah, I'm super stoked. Like Obsession like just like lit this fire in me. I'm like, "Dude, I could [ __ ] I want to do this. It just seems so fun."
>> Yeah. And it's awesome. And now look at what all he's going to be doing.
>> I know. It's crazy.
>> Texas Chainsaw Master. He's got the other movie he's already got that's got Aaron Paul and Bryce Dallas Howard.
>> Yep.
>> The redhead.
>> Looks crazy.
>> Yeah, >> we could do that. We could like >> Sure.
>> do some method acting. We could tell.
>> Sure. Yeah, we can try. Yeah.
>> Yeah.
>> We can at least try. Yeah.
>> Yeah, we can try. Yeah.
>> Crowdfund it.
>> Yeah. Or >> possibly.
>> Yeah.
>> Be fun.
>> Just going to start with a whole ass movie.
>> Not a whole movie, a short.
>> Yeah. You do like a short and then uh cuz that's what they did. They did like their short version of it and then it got like some funding for a a fulllength version and then they debuted that at like an indie thing and then it won so many awards that a big company picked it up and paid like almost 20 million for it.
>> Oh, nice. And then he made the the main movie. So this is like his third iteration of it.
>> Oh >> yeah. Yeah. They filmed the first thing for whatever budget just in one of their apartments >> like just the I guess like the >> a concept concept >> and then supposed at least at least from what I've read.
>> That's so cool.
>> And then they filmed a full version that they had like the 750 for. And then that version is what got bought for like 20 million. Yeah. And then they filmed this version. Yeah, the uh the marketing they put behind that was absolutely insane.
Like the billboards and stuff.
>> Yeah. And I mean they all have such a good social presence already that like everyone and even like that now since we've watched it my feeds on everything have become nothing but all of them all of the other actors in it make like little behind the scenes stuff and I'm just like gez >> the behind the scenes stuff is so fun.
>> It was cool. Yeah. That scene of her pissing and I was like I saw that. Oh yeah. They had like a a huge like there's like three women over in the corner with like a huge boom arm that was holding like a tube that went down to her so they could like pump piss into it and >> they had like giant syringes of >> probably piss.
>> Probably fake piss.
>> Just green water. Yeah.
>> Uh yeah. And they were like just pumping this piss into it real quick. J. They were like, and it's it's cool cuz you see the the behind the scenes stuff of like whenever uh the other guy comes in and he's like he's like he's like just he's like, "You need to say it this."
He's like, "All right, cool. I wish for a billion dollars." And he snaps it and he's like, "No." And he falls to his knees and then like it just says they're like throwing stacks of like money down onto him and [ __ ] And then the other guy's like he's like, "All right, now follow your knees." He's like, "All right, now look at him. All right, now stand up." So he's like saying all this [ __ ] to him, giving him these cues like how like we've done on before >> and it was cool to see that. I'm like, "Oh, cool." Like they they do that same [ __ ] where they give you the queue and they're able to just like [ __ ] wipe that audio out.
>> Yeah, that's so cool.
>> Yeah, it was neat.
>> I watched the the one behind the scenes where um Indie, the girl who plays um Nikki Yeah.
>> she's like it's the scene with her and Sarah in the car and she's like running.
>> Oh yeah. and she's just like giggling and she's just like dancing and she's singing songs and like I love that.
>> Yeah, the I saw the scene where she was in the corner watching him, you know, spoiler alerts. Uh the scene where she's in the corner watching him sleep.
>> Yeah, >> they did. Did you see they did her makeup like all weird?
>> Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And all that was just it was just like eye shadow and like concealer.
>> Fake like eyeball like looking like on her eyes. It was like uncanny valley look and then put her in the corner. So like her face looked all like [ __ ] weird. Yeah, it was really good.
>> No. Yeah, that one that that lit a fire in me. So >> yeah, I want to do that.
>> It was sick.
>> I have I have hope for horror movies this year. Definitely.
>> Yeah, there's a freaking bunch of them coming out. There's like 10 other horror movies that are really hyped coming out.
>> Oh yeah, Evil Dead. Yeah, they've already got the next Evil Dead planned and this one's not even out yet.
>> Yeah, that Back Rooms Passenger.
>> Passenger looks really good.
>> Looks good. Uh there's a handful more.
>> Yeah, I'm super stoked.
>> Yeah, this would be a good year for it.
>> Yeah, now they need to like translate this into like gaming, like come out with some horror games that aren't complete ass.
>> Well, a lot of this is transitioning from games. It's like the And it's the same thing. It's these indie game developers and [ __ ] or making games and they're like, "Oh, we should turn that into a movie like Back Rooms." Uh, I saw there's another movie that's similar to Back Rooms that I had played before that's called like Gate 8 or something like that and it's like you're in Japanese uh subway terminals and it's like very back rooms vibe. I saw that's on Netflix now of like the from the game. Oh [ __ ] that might be worth watching.
>> Yeah, I want to watch that.
>> Yeah, there's another show that just came out that was it's all like either Japanese or Chinese or whatever too. I forget what it's called, but it's they're all these superheroes that are based on Stanley superheroes that he came up with that he never made full superheroes. So, it's like this all these Chinese or Japanese people that are have these superpowers and [ __ ] and they're like all badass, but like it's kind of silly like they don't really know how to use their powers and like they're like kind of silly with it and they're like [ __ ] each other up like accidentally like punching each other through walls and [ __ ] So, I've seen a lot of clips of that floating around like, "Oh, this looks like this could be fun."
>> Oh, yeah.
>> So, that's on Netflix maybe now.
>> But there's Yeah, there's a a bunch of crazy [ __ ] coming out.
>> Dude, what is up with people like absolutely like creating the best series of something that has ever existed and then ruining it in like the the very end. It happened with Game of Thrones.
I'll never get over that. And then it happened with Stranger Things. That was ass. And then the the ending to the boys. What was that?
>> I think it's just like >> it's so hard to tie so many things together at the end and they're like, >> "Yeah, >> they've gotten so many subplots and so many stories and stuff going on that like you almost the way they do these shows now, you almost can't nail it in an episode."
>> No. You think they would [ __ ] plan like or ruin an entire like just piss off an entire fan base and then your legacy is that you [ __ ] up >> the ending to one of the greatest shows of all time.
>> Yeah, that boy's ending. Like I get it and I get the way this [ __ ] went, but my Twitter has been nothing but like plot holes of why so much of that sucked.
Because they, you know, spoiler alerts again, they pumped Homelander full of that [ __ ] V. Yeah.
>> The original formula, so he should be like extra powerful.
>> Mhm.
>> And they're comparing him like that fight scene with him and Kimo and Butcher at the end in the Oval Office.
>> What a [ __ ] he was in it.
>> Yeah, I didn't like that.
>> And and because he can there was so many scenes where he can fly to the moon and back in like two seconds. Homelander. Yeah. And the scenes of him trying to fly away from them, grabbing, he like is flying in slow motion and they're just grabbing him out of the air and [ __ ] and it's just like >> And this is like in the comics.
>> No, this was in the show. Like there was like >> I mean you mean like in the comics like he's What was the ending?
>> Oh, and so in the comic book version of it and you know and I I know it loosely uh Black Noir is so Homelander is actually good in the comics like he's normal. He's like the good guy. And all this [ __ ] keeps happening of Homelander killing people and doing crazy [ __ ] And come to find out, Black Noir is like a a copy of Homelander and he just like keeps it concealed and he's the one doing all these [ __ ] up crimes and [ __ ] and like being like evil and [ __ ] with [ __ ] and it drives Homelander like nuts. Like people start to like hate him and he like starts to like question if he is doing these things and he don't realize it. Some some thing there. But like it's revealed that like in the end like he pulls his mask off and Black Noir is like a twin of Homelander and he's been the one that's been doing all this crazy [ __ ] >> Uh but yeah, they they didn't want to do that because they they made Homelander such a likable as like the villain character that they didn't want to like take that away from him.
>> I get that >> at the end and they're making him and he's like, "I'll suck your dick. I'll I'll eat my shit." like just kind of like ridiculous >> became like a huge it was very McGruber.
>> Yes.
>> Like it was like it was [ __ ] dick.
>> Just tell me what you want me to [ __ ] >> Just point it out to the room and I'll [ __ ] it for you.
>> So yeah, it was like a very odd ending scene there. And then the same thing uh when Kimo blasted all of them and it took away their powers. Uh I I think they said they're maybe setting this up Homelander's son. It shouldn't have took his powers away because he was born a super.
>> Yeah.
>> So that shouldn't have been able to take his powers away. Her blast.
>> U Butcher was like so [ __ ] up with cancer when he took the V, that was the only thing that was fixing him. So once he got unblasted, he should have just been like [ __ ] falling apart. Like he should have been basically dead. Uh but he was like still beating the hell out of Homelander. Uh yeah, there was just like so many loopho like what did I guess because they're they're doing the show about uh Soulja Boy. So they're like in the [ __ ] >> freeze tank.
>> Uh >> I'm assuming they're going back in time.
>> It'll it'll probably start showing him come out of that is what I expect. It'll show them getting him out of that and then it'll be like flashbacks and it'll probably pick it cuz it's supposed to be his team back like during whatever era he was popular in the 50s60s some [ __ ] like that.
>> Yeah. Well, he was bagging that Nazi chick. So, >> yeah. And it's like his whole group the seven or whatever their group was.
>> Okay.
>> But that that should be fun. Um so high hopes for that. But yeah, just like so much like I guess they canled that Jin V show cuz that girl was supposed to be like super [ __ ] powerful too and they didn't use her at all.
>> I didn't know there was a >> Yeah, she that girl uh whatever her name is, she can control people's like blood so she can make them do whatever she wants and she can literally just like rip their blood out of their body. Like she's like super [ __ ] powerful. like she's on Homelander's level of power and they just had her like taking pictures and doing [ __ ] in this season and they're like, "Oh yeah, we don't need you anymore. Go [ __ ] off."
>> Huh.
>> And so like there's just a lot of like weird setup and stuff that just wasn't used for anything.
>> Uh but you know, whatever. Shows be showing sometimes.
>> Yeah, I'm feeling that way about From.
>> Yeah.
>> Right now.
>> Yeah. From from is a pretty cool horror show, but it just keeps building more and more questions. questions instead of like and you never were four seasons deep in this and you have no answers to anything.
>> Yeah, that part's >> you can only set it up for so long to start resolving what some re resolution to something. Yeah.
>> Like everything just keeps getting deeper and deeper and deeper and more and more confusing and you're just like what what? Okay, so now what? And >> yeah, it's it's a fun show. It's a cool concept, but like they just keep making it more and more ridiculous that you're like, "All right, so now what's going to happen?"
>> Yeah.
>> I don't know. But, you know, whatever.
>> Yeah. I mean, that's why I think the YouTube people are are crushing it right now. It's just cuz like it's just everything coming out of LA is ass.
>> Yeah. And it's cuz they want to drag it out. They want to make it as long Yeah.
They want to make it as long as they can so they can get money and they they drain it to where they're like they can't come up with anything else.
They're like [ __ ] just like end it. Like >> forget all these Lucians, we'll just kill them.
>> Well, I think that's your answer right there is why does all these huge series have dog [ __ ] endings?
>> Yeah.
>> Uh they're probably written to continue. Like the goal of every show is to get as many seasons as you can.
>> Yeah.
>> And you can't start tying up loose ends >> unless you're Game of Thrones just liked killing people. So they have a less of an excuse.
>> Sure. Yeah.
>> But >> you know, you your writers are trying to make like weave this giant web.
>> Yeah.
>> Until one day the studio says, "This is your last season."
>> Yeah. You're Oh, >> oh [ __ ] Okay.
>> Yeah. They're like, "All right."
>> And then, you know, at that point, >> Yeah.
>> If you're a writer for that show, you should care about the quality of your show, but >> you're also [ __ ] putting your resume out there, doing other things. What am I going to do when this season's over?
>> Sure. So the effort I think when they find out a show is ending it's just like a [ __ ] you guys.
>> Yeah. All right. I'm done.
>> Dude, speaking of So Laura was telling me the show Yellowstone pretty much ruined like that area of like Montana, Idaho, whatever.
>> Um just because everyone's like, "Oh, this is cool. Like I should leave California and bring all my [ __ ] into this space." So they're driving up the prices of everything. It's just becoming very like gentrified and whatever the [ __ ] They're now going to be filming a um reality show out of Bernie called something Lives and Hill Country Housewives or something.
>> Yeah, it's like Secrets Lives and and Bernie Housewives, some [ __ ] Yeah, >> they're filming it here in Bernie and my only thought is like, God, traffic is going to suck so bad now.
>> Yeah, cuz it already kind of sucks. It sucks ass.
>> Like where River Road is and the main street just trying to get anywhere, you're like what the [ __ ] Like you have to plan for the traffic.
>> Just the thought of like a bunch of like snoody I mean it's already like a town full of like snoody pretentious people.
>> But like I feel like that's just going to bring a wave of [ __ ] into the town of like people just like >> I don't know why they chose Bernie.
That's so weird.
>> Uh the same reason all the snoody [ __ ] chose Bernie in the first place.
Yeah, >> Snoody Bit Central, I >> guess. But like what? So, it's going to be like like the the housewives who like own the boutiques or what?
>> I don't know. I guess it's just it's like I think it's just like rich bored moms >> like and like you know their their husband's sleeping with this lady, their these people have been divorced and now there's drama with this like it's just going to be like rich [ __ ] drama. I I think >> Wonder how much of that is like real and how much is like curated.
>> I'm sure a lot of it's going to be scripted. All [ __ ] is scripted to make it like more ridiculous.
>> I mean, even on the the real the Redneck Island reality show that I was on like a lot of that like not scripted but like prompted like how do you feel about this or like this is a setup or like >> this person called you a [ __ ] I don't know. Do something with it.
>> They might have called you a [ __ ] What are you going to do about it? Are you a [ __ ] or what? Well, like there was even a scene where it was they made it look like I was watching this girl pole dance and shake her ass and I was like looking at her in disgust and I was like she was pole dancing downstairs and I was upstairs like in the kitchen doing something like the shot that they used and I was like this wasn't even in the same room and I was like I don't even remember her doing that.
>> So like a lot of stuff is like splicing.
>> So they just used like B-roll of your stink face or >> Yes. Yes. made it look like I was watching her pole dance in disgust.
>> They also do like this thing called franken biting where they'll like take several different pieces of like sentences that you say over a certain time frame and they'll splice it together to make it sound like you said something you didn't.
>> Which is crazy. They did that to me a couple times, too. I was like, "Huh?"
Like you can tell like the like the lilt like an inflection in my voice is different.
>> Yeah. In like these different >> Yeah. But your average viewer can't.
Your >> what?
>> The average viewer can't.
>> Yeah.
>> Yeah. It's crazy.
>> So, yeah.
>> Yeah. I mean, they got to like sell it.
So, it's got to seem like this, what is this [ __ ] going to do?
They got to make you want to watch it for the drama. So, >> yeah. Like, no one's going to watch a show of, you know, real world Bernie when everyone's just like, "Hey man, you you want to drink and play video games today?"
>> Yeah.
>> Yeah. Actually, you want you want to go get some like yummy treats at the local bar?
>> Oh, Caleb already cooked. [ __ ] Yeah, of course. Yeah. Yeah. You want to get in the pool after that and we'll film some [ __ ] Yeah, sure.
>> Hey, that snoody [ __ ] wants to come over.
>> No. No.
>> Okay, then. Actually, no. Oh, you know that one rich mom that's got like 20 husbands? She wants to come hang out.
No.
>> No.
>> Tell her the gate's broken.
>> Tell her no. Oh, okay.
>> Yeah. The only thing I'm worried about is traffic. That's That's how like in Oh, >> you guys are [ __ ] already here.
>> I'm showing my >> Tell people where you are, but you're [ __ ] >> Like, oh, they're filming a reality show here. [ __ ] the traffic.
>> How much do we want to bet that Jared somehow ends up on this show?
>> Oh, yeah. He's That would be so funny.
>> Like he I feel like he would try some way to insert himself into this show.
>> Like a speaking part or a There's Jared.
>> Yeah. like a a a a character that appears and like maybe he just comes and goes.
>> I think it depends on how far they are into production already.
>> Yeah.
>> If it's still like in pre-production, we should instigate this.
>> I don't think it cuz we know some people that are like involved and talking to these people. It's through Bravo. But um >> yeah, I could I could definitely see him doing that. like to [ __ ] with people.
Yeah. Like to >> come in as like a bachelor or some [ __ ] and then he just like [ __ ] with them or something.
>> I did hear.
>> Is he the bachelor type for TV though?
>> It'd be funny.
>> Supposed to be like better looking.
>> Well, I mean the the newest Bachelor show that got cancelled and then re like she almost hits children with chairs and [ __ ] So >> Oh, >> I mean you know it's drama.
He could he could bring some drama to the show. So, >> I heard that they weren't like the city or some council, whatever, did some announcement where they're like, "We're not involved in this.
>> We didn't approve of this." And that they can only film on like private property and they're going to be at these girls.
>> That just translates to [ __ ] we wanted to charge them x amount for permits and they told us to [ __ ] off.
>> Yeah, possibly.
>> The city just didn't get money. So now they're like, "Yeah, >> cuz like what city is actually going to say no to a show being filmed?"
>> The city of Bernie.
>> Yeah.
>> Let the [ __ ] the Black Rifle and the Hoonigan guys drift around their streets.
>> Yeah.
>> Oh, that's true.
>> Which is like They're just pissed they didn't get permit money.
>> They did kind of like, you know, for that I could see being an easier selling point cuz it's like, "Hey, it's for veterans. This is like a cool thing for veterans for Veterans Day that we're doing." And they're probably like, "Oh, [ __ ] yeah, cool." Then Bravo's like, "Hey, this is for like rich, snoody [ __ ] who like are all tossing around the same guy. Can we not pay you for this?" And they're probably like, "What?
No." Like, "We're going to make your town look like it's full of bitches."
Yeah. Uh, not saying your viewpoint is wrong, >> but also they were only asking to shut down stuff for like hours at a time, not >> Yeah.
>> days.
Uh, they probably could have fibbed about their production budget, like, "Oh, we really just don't even have that money." But yeah, >> when something like Bravo comes through, >> many days of filming, >> you know, they got the budget >> and if they just say, "No, we're not going to pay you."
>> Yeah.
>> Then the city can just be like, "Yeah."
>> Yeah. I had seen there was some kind of petition or something that was like to get it not allowed or something like that that already had like >> few hundred or something.
>> Wives of Bernie. Yeah.
>> Like I think they're still trying to stop Bies from coming through.
>> Oh no, not that. I love Bies.
>> That will they've been trying since day one. Bies is still going to come.
>> Yeah. like that will suck a lot down there cuz it's right across from HB, ain't it? Like right across that uh >> that bridge over there across from Home Depot, that big section. I feel like it's Is that going to be there?
>> I want to say it's more south than that.
>> Okay. I say cuz that's like a huge place they've been cleaning up that's right off the industry.
>> I forget what they're building there, but it's >> I think it's like a Target kind of anchor store situation there.
>> Oh, that'd be nice, too. Uh, I want to say BIES is planned more south of that, like where Ford of Bernie and Nissan of Bernie is.
>> Okay, that probably make more sense.
Yeah, a little more towards San Antonio.
>> Yeah. Well, >> well, I wonder what they're going to do about the damn roads. Are they going to add more?
>> Well, they're never going to fix them, that's for sure.
>> Well, whoever develops is typically responsible for expanding roads as much as the city can force them.
>> Yeah.
>> Yeah. uh like the whole area where the ranch I guess still is that was purchased by a development company and they're trying to develop it and one of the big arguments to not let them develop it is it's just [ __ ] like two or three two-lane roads in and out of that place and they want to build thousands of homes.
>> Yeah.
>> How?
>> Yeah.
>> How?
>> It's it's crazy, man. They're And they're when they're destroying all these animals homes, they're like pushing them into the neighborhood. So now you've got more bobcats, more coyotes like searching like on this property too. Just like everywhere.
>> Well, yeah. It's like me going to the airport last week and I'm literally pulling into a stop sign and a deer runs right face burst into the back of my truck and dents my whole [ __ ] truck in and rips my fender flare off. And I was like looking in my mirrors like what the [ __ ] Did I hit something? And then I see a deer laying on the road like flipping around crazy and then it just hops up and goes over the road. I'm like you idiot. And then >> like you were stopped and it hit you.
pretty much stopped. I was coming to I was like probably doing 15 mph coming to a stop at a stop sign and then there was a car in front of me, cars behind me, like four or five deer go across like behind me and one jumps and goes like face first into my truck.
>> Okay.
>> Yeah.
>> So, your I didn't even look at your tries. It like >> it's a big dent. It ripped my fender flare off and dented the [ __ ] out of my like rear like wheel well almost.
>> That thing would have had to have launched itself. Yeah, I think it literally tried to jump the whole like road and went face first into my truck.
>> Yeah. You know what's not super scary?
But like when you're driving at night and you see one deer >> Mhm. you're like, "Where's the other one?
>> Where's your friend [ __ ] >> Where's all the rest of them at?" Yeah, >> dude. That's especially scary like when I'm up with Laura. We had an elk and they're massive.
>> It's a horse, basically.
>> It's a It's insane. Yeah, >> it came within inches of hitting her truck and both of us were just sitting there with puckered buttholes like, "Oh my god, what the fuck?"
>> Like that's when you might die.
>> Yeah, that one was scary.
>> You plow into a fully >> horned up elk.
>> Yeah, cuz my brother hit a deer in Alabama not going that fast and it completely totaled his entire car and my dad had to go get him.
>> Yeah. I mean, there's still like 100 plus pounds that you're just plowing into.
>> Yeah. It's like hitting motorcycles.
>> Yeah. Yeah. So, yeah, they're pretty dumb around here.
>> But that elk walked away like that's right.
>> Yeah. [ __ ] you, dude.
>> Stupid [ __ ] in your truck. [ __ ] off.
>> Yeah. Like hit and then it like went and just walked down the road.
>> Yeah.
>> Like in front of us that Yeah. It's my road, [ __ ] >> It's a good place to walk, [ __ ] >> We were like, >> bad place to drive.
>> Yeah, I like this [ __ ] >> Okay.
It's my walking time. I'm glad I haven't hit anything. Knock wood again. Yeah.
But >> yeah, I didn't hit anything. I got freaking assaulted in my truck. Like I literally I was like when I I like like I was like sitting at the stop sign and then I like heard a loud thud and I'm like what the [ __ ] I'm like looking in my mirrors like looking out my window and I see all these deer behind me and then one laying like halfway on the road like coming like out of its stoop and then it gets up and then just like all right, I'm out of here. I'm like you [ __ ] In the deer's defense, camouflage wrap.
>> Yeah. Black camouflage in the middle of the day.
>> Not a [ __ ] smart idea anymore.
>> Let's see. What is What is that? Is there something there? Oh, yeah.
>> What is it? It's so camouflaged. I can't tell. Let me [ __ ] jump into it at 20 miles hour.
[ __ ] [ __ ] >> Dude, one time, this is I mean, same but different. I was having like a really really bad day and >> you're so happy all the time.
>> Oh my god. This is like Okay, this is like 15 14 years ago and I was like I put on my headphones. I was like I'm going to go for a walk, clear my head and I was listening to um Don't Worry, Be Happy, that song. And I was starting to feel pretty good. I was like a maybe it's not such a bad day. And it was like the the chorus it like the whole it just swelled and then I watched a kitten get run over by a car and I was like wow the irony of this situation is not lost on me.
>> Your life is a shitty movie.
>> Sorry to bring the mood down.
>> Yeah, it happens.
>> We're talking about [ __ ] getting run over.
>> Yeah, I mean animals can be pretty dumb.
I mean, I don't think that was the kitten's fault.
>> Why was he in the road?
>> The kittens are pretty [ __ ] stupid.
Like, I recently saw a video. There was some dude on a motorcycle like hopped out at a busy intersection to go rescue a cat >> and this [ __ ] cat up scared obviously.
>> Yeah.
>> Runs into the intersection and crawls into like the wheel well of a car and is like chilling on the brake disc. M >> luckily the guy would like understood the guy's hand motions and didn't just drive away.
>> Yeah.
>> But they had to fish this kitten out of a wheel well of a [ __ ] car on the road.
>> That's happened so many times. Cats love to crawl up in an engine of a vehicle cuz it's nice and warm and >> but usually when it's parked.
>> Yeah. Yeah.
>> Like I see that all the time where like they get in the engine and the wheel well of a parked vehicle cuz it is still warm on a cold night.
>> Yeah.
>> Like the car was waiting at a stoplight and >> I was like, "Oh, brake pads." Yes.
Perfect.
>> Cool. Yeah. good place to sleep. Ah, that's literally people get in their cars and start them up and then it just chops cats up and you're like, "What the fuck?" Like, >> yeah.
>> What you like? Yeah. You're like, "What's wrong with my truck?" You open up your engine, it's just guts. You're like, "What the fuck?"
>> Oh, no.
>> Wait, wait. Where's my house cat? [ __ ] Like, that happens. Pretty dumb.
>> Yeah. Well, I mean, the one cat that I tried to rescue, I gave to Peter. Yeah.
And then the other one I found like this was months ago. I just saw it like a couple weeks back and it was in the neighbor's lawn. Yeah. With all the scary dogs and I was like, "What the fuck?"
>> But yeah, no, that thing ran for me when I was I'm like, "I'm trying to save you."
>> Yeah.
>> Every time.
>> Hey, that crazy dark-haired [ __ ] running and yelling is trying to save you. Nope. Don't believe her.
>> I wasn't running and yelling. I was talking a very calm, cool, collected come hither like a serial killer. Oh, well, yesterday. Yeah. Literally yesterday at like [ __ ] 9:00 a.m. we were filming uh like a skit video and we were over at Owens because we needed to use animals and his cow like his like the pigs are fine, whatever, but like his cows are not like friendly. That's not like a cow you like can walk up to and pet. They were like so skittish and jumpy and the video it's like it's me talking about this animal translator and the the thing that you put like on their head to like read their thoughts. It's a colander pretty much and with like wires that ran to it. So it's like we put feet out to go to the cows. I'm like trying to like ease her. I'm like, "Hey buddy.
Hey." Like and he's like already like super sketched out and I'm like, "Yeah, I'm walking towards you with a [ __ ] giant colander I'm trying to put on your head."
>> Yeah. And you're a cow that walks on two feet.
>> Yeah. Yeah. And so I like get up to him and like I get ready to like we're trying to like shoot the scene and it [ __ ] sidesteps and like kicks the [ __ ] out of my leg and just like gets me like dirty as [ __ ] like it it just it hit and then like swiped off so it like didn't do anything but just like like it it it's going to be funny on video cuz it looks like it kicks the [ __ ] out of me. Uh but I was just like [ __ ] I'm like it's 9:00 a.m. dude now I'm like covered in mud and [ __ ] cuz this [ __ ] cow is not a friendly cow. But it it'll be like a funny part of the video that we were able to throw in.
>> Is this like just like a quick sketch or >> Yeah, it's like a sketch of me talking about it's called Zeus Beak. It's like the little contraption. It's like a now commercial where it's like a uh Have you ever wondered Have you ever wondered what your animals are thinking? Yeah, all the time. Well, now you can zoo big and it's like a cell phone and like a a [ __ ] colander with wires. You like put it on their animals heads and they like say [ __ ] like they all say like some of them say like normal animal things and the other ones say like [ __ ] up [ __ ] and you're just like, "Oh god." So yeah, we're trying to put it on the cow and I was like, you know, "Sorry, we have to make you into cheeseburgers." And then it kicked the [ __ ] out of me. Did you put it on the uh bearded dragon that I gave them?
>> No, we put it on the pigs cuz the pigs were chill. We did dogs, cats, uh we did rabbits, and a chicken. So, >> yeah. And like most of them will just say like some basic [ __ ] and then then it gets like really dark and [ __ ] up, especially the pig. Uh so we got like a little monologue.
>> Oh yeah.
>> For it. So it should be pretty funny.
That'll be on Pepper Box, so that'll be a good time.
>> Hell yeah.
>> Well, cool.
>> Cool. Uh, thanks for hanging out on Time for Pie. We're going to go do Time for Sips over on Patreon. So, if you don't have that, come over and listen to us talk about some more weird [ __ ] >> Oh, yeah. It >> gets worse. Yeah, it gets worse.
>> It always gets worse over there.
>> Okay. Bye.
>> Bye.
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