The video provides a sharp look at the political tensions of the Ultimate era, turning a cynical comic run into a serious study of social conflict. It is a polished analysis that finds genuine intellectual depth in a series often known only for its edge.
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Ultimate X-Men Complete StoryHinzugefügt:
Released in 2001, written by Mark Miller or Mar if you want to annoy him with art by Andy Cubert. This is Ultimate X-Men volume 1, the Tomorrow, people.
The book begins in a city somewhere, maybe Los Angeles or San Diego or something. I don't know. There's palm trees. This man eating an ice pop and walking his dog looks up to the sky as at least 11 sentinels fly above the city. For anyone uh unaware, sentinels are these giant killer robots that are designed specifically to hunt down anyone who has the mutant gene. And no, not not her, not Jean Gray. No, I meant like Gene and exterminate them.
Sometimes they'll get captured, but that's usually only if they are a main character. The Sentinels, they just start blasting people.
>> I started blasting.
I don't see so good, so I missed. Then they ran away. I ran after him.
>> Okay.
>> Bang. Try to shoot him in the back, but I don't want so good either.
>> And the man and his dog are launched away after an explosion throws them into the air. A Sentinel lands before the crumpled man and then scans him. And the scan comes up as a confirmed mutant.
Then the Sentinel steps on the man and his dog. Cut to San Diego. A guy in a bar who kind of looks like Greg Capulo chalks his pull cue and makes fun of Hank McCoy for being a mutant. The ruffian gets ready to rack Hank on the back, but Hank performs an acrobatic flip out of the way and kicks the guy in the face with his giant gross feet. The bar owner whips out a shotgun and orders Hank to leave the bar. And huh, where have I seen this before?
for you.
>> Yeah, get out of my bar for you.
>> As Hank leaves, he passes a young woman with red hair and a pixie cut, and she asks if he ever wonders what it would be like to live in a place that doesn't fear or hate him. Then she calls him by name, and Hank asks who she is, and the woman tells her that she's the best thing that's ever happened to him since the size 42 Reebok. Cut to Athens, Texas. Yeehaw. The woman in weirdly revealing clothing walks into a sheriff's office and meets Deputy dog. Really? Whatever the woman. Okay, look. This is Gan Gray. This is what is what Gan Gray looks like in the Ultimate Universe.
Gan carries a blockbuster video card, a reference which will never fall apart, and makes the deputy see it as a FBI badge and makes herself appear as a middle-aged federal agent. Then she asked to see the mutant they have arrested. They walk into the [ __ ] the cell room, whatever it's called. I can't remember. Anyway, it's Storm. This is Storm. Storm's been locked up. Uh, Gene knocks out the deputy and frees her. Cut to New York. Pod Rasputin and his Russian colleagues prepare for an arms deal when a helicopter flies out of nowhere and unloads on everybody, killing them all except for Colossus. He just stands there with his clothes ripped from his metal form. And I think he starts crying or something. And then Gene appears.
Cut to the Xavier Institute for Gifted Children. Scott Summers introduces himself to the X-Men.
>> Scott, >> what the [ __ ] are these outfits? Good lord, how much baby powder do these people need to use to get into those things? And why do they all have weird thigh holes in their pants except for Cyclops and Beast? Apparently, these suits are some sort of cloaking device that allows them to remain undetected by sentinels. Why are they so skimpy? Is Professor X a pervert in this universe, too? Probably. I'm pretty sure he confesses his love for Jean, a 19-year-old girl in a later story.
Anyway, and if you're wondering how they keep the secrecy of a mutant school from these construction workers, don't worry.
Professor X is just abusing their thoughts and making them [ __ ] I don't know, slaves, I guess. Cyclops leads the team into the library, which looks nothing like a library and is actually just cerebro with a giant fireplace on one side, and they meet Professor Charles Xavier. Storm talks [ __ ] about their dumb code names and says that she doesn't like them.
Professor X says that they have been rebaptized as a posthuman being.
Professor X uses Cerebro and discovers a 15-year-old runaway mutant named Bobby Drake. Cut to Time Square. The team walks around looking for Bobby. And then Beast spots the boy on a bus. How does Beast do this? Well, he's riding on top of a cab. Way to keep a low profile. Oh, and look at that. The advertisement is from Beauty and the Beast. Ain't that clever? Ain't it clever? Then Sentinels show up. One of them picks up the bus.
So, Beast leaps through it and swipes Bobby out of the way before the bus is just incinerated with, I'm sure, everyone else on board. Then, Storm brings down the power of lightning and strikes the Sentinels. Cyclops is like, "Holy [ __ ] you just took out three sentinels at once. How did you Oh, you passed out." Beast leaps around dodging Sentinel strikes as Colossus and Gene fight some others. And Cyclops tries to get Storm to safety. They fight some more and the team is about to be vanquished when Bobby Drake uses his ice powers and freezes a sentinel. Beast holds him up in excitement like a prized fighter and deems him Iceman. And then Bobby's hit in the head with a glass bottle and a lynch mob forms and the X-Men flee as a police officer opens fire at them. Cut to the Savage Land.
Magneto watches the news footage in his television screen room. Magneto tells him that Charles has finally resurfaced and established a little base in North America. Then he orders Quicksilver to get an assassin to find and kill Charles before he can get any more mutants. And that assassin is Wolverine Bub. Later at JFK International, Wolverine disembarks and finds his handler, I guess, and they walk to a car and then are riddled with bullets and die. Meanwhile, the X-Men half-hazardly fly through New York in their Blackbird.
And when they return to the mansion, they find Cyclops firing optic blasts at Bobby. What the [ __ ] is going on here?
Also, something I never thought about until just right now. Is Bobby Drake naked? Why does he only have a bandana and an armband on? Do his clothes like turn to ice as well? Do they do they fall off of him? Do they fall apart around him? Does does he put the bandana and armband on after he turns to ice? Is this 15-year-old boy running around naked? That's what I'm asking here. What is going on at this weird quote unquote school? What is really being taught here anyway, Xavier? Later, the team heads into Cerebro, and Professor X explains that a mutant has been captured by the military and is in a convoy on its way to Canada. Colossus, the smartest member of this group, asks if Magneto is behind this. And Xavier's like, "Nah, if Magneto was behind this, he would have leveled half this city." Don't be silly.
This is ridiculous. This is some completely unrelated situation to Magneto. Now go and intercept this convoy with minimum force. Also, the mutant is Wolverine. Jean and Scott freak out, and then they have to give the others Wolverine's rundown. Uh yeah, he was a part of a black ops unit called Weapon X blah blah blah. The Pentagon used it to capture and execute mutants.
Then he escaped like two years ago and hasn't been seen since. Charles guilt trips a 15-year-old into going on this dangerous mission and then the X-Men head off. Meanwhile, at the convoy, the convoy screeches to a halt and in the road ahead of them stand the X-Men.
Storm uses her powers to create a storm of some storm sort and the X-Men fight the military with maximum force.
Colossus and Beast free Wolverine. Then he runs out of the truck, steals a motorcycle, and rides off after Wraith, who escaped when [ __ ] was hitting the fan. Logan somehow appears in front of the road where Wraith is going, causing he and his driver to crash and fly out of the Jeep. Logan's about to kill him when Gene and the others tell him to stop. Blah blah blah. Don't be an animal. Be a bigger man. Blah blah blah.
Then Logan is launched away by Gene because he he doesn't give a [ __ ] and is knocked unconscious. Later at the school, Wolverine murders all the X-Men.
Then Professor X appears and he's like, "I'd be lying if I said I wasn't impressed by your abilities, but you weren't supposed to kill them all." Then Logan gets out of the danger room and asks if they have any VR porn, and Bobby runs into the room and tells everybody that they need to see the news right now. The president's daughter has been kidnapped by the Brotherhood of Mutants.
The news feed is interrupted by Magneto and he says that 113 mutants have been murdered by Sentinels, but their next mutant kill will be followed by the death of the president's daughter.
Cyclops asks what they do and Professor X says that they have to rescue her.
Then Cyclops says that Magneto is right, but they can't let them use a girl as a bargaining chip. Cut to Croatia.
Quicksilver, Blob, Toad, Scarlet Witch, and Mastermind sit around in this sit around in a hotel room where they have the president's daughter hostage. Then Colossus slams a wooden beam through the floor as Beast crashes down from the ceiling. Beast frees the girl and slides down an ice slide and into a car that I assume Cyclops stole from somewhere. And Quicksilver gives chase, pulls the keys out of the ignition, and taunts Cyclops from the hood. So Cyclops blasts him.
Then Wolverine fights Quicksilver as Toad attacks the others. Meanwhile, Wolverine apparently stole a cop car and grabbed the president's daughter and races down a street away from the Scarlet Witch and drives off a [ __ ] cliff, but they're caught by the Blackbird. Don't worry, everybody's fine. Oh Jesus, what the [ __ ] is this page? Seriously. Jean says, "You do anything to impress a 17-year-old girl in a tight sweater." What the [ __ ] Actually, I've kind of got my eye on a telepathic 19-year-old. What the [ __ ] You're like 100 years old. This isn't even the worst thing he ever does. In Ultimate Spider-Man, Peter and Wolverine get their bodies swapped and Wolverine tries to [ __ ] Mary Jane Watson, who's like 15. And that's just what we see on pages. God knows what else he's done whenever we aren't around and reading these books. Meanwhile, the rest of the X-Men reconvene and Storm says that she thinks Beast is dead. Then Cyclops is shot in the chest and falls to the ground as Bobby tells the others that a truck full of locals are shooting at them. Cyclops says, "Stay cool, Iceman.
Why do you think God created Kevlar?"
Then he blasts the truck and kills everybody inside. The X-Men slowly make their ways closer and closer to each other as the militia corrals them into a circle. Then Storm yells, "Even Professor X was ready to sacrifice all seven of us just to save some spoiled little white chick with an old money surname." Which I mean, like, yeah, good point. Then a large shadow appears above the gunman, and a [ __ ] train is dropped on them. Magneto lowers himself down to the ground and says that he's having a tough time believing that Charles would send them, too. Then Magneto asks how they could come here and risk their lives to defend state sanctioned murder of their own species.
Cyclops says that the world isn't so black and white. And Magneto tells him to shut up and orders them to leave. As the X-Men drive away, Scarlet Witch asks Wolver Scarlet Witch asks if Wolverine has allied himself with them. And Magneto calls her an idiot and says not to doubt him because holding off a kill means that there's a woman he wants to bang.
I hate this. Cut to the exion. Wolverine comes to visit Gene and the unconscious beast. Uh, they take a walk through the beautifully luxurious back garden and Wolverine asks how she feels and she explains that she believes that Professor X has great plans and ideas and that they'll get through this. And then she asks how he feels about him.
You know, like a creep in a vinyl vest.
Jean says that she's not sure why she likes Wolverine and wishes that they never met. Then Wolverine's like, "So, how come you find me so attractive?"
Then they make out and [ __ ] like Jean must lose all power in her legs because look at this position they're in. And she just she just goes all over him as Cyclops watches from the window. and Beast [ __ ] Wolverine is like he must smell Cyclops is watching them because he's like, "Yeah, check it out. I'm [ __ ] your girl." Later, Cyclops tells Professor X that he's leaving. So, Charles releases some pleasant hormones into his bloodstream to calm him down.
You know, like an insane person would if you had telepathy and wanted to control others. Cyclops asks if Professor X can read his thoughts now and then storms out. Cut to the Savage Land. The Blackbird lands and Cyclops meets Magneto on the shoreline and then fireworks go off. Was that Was that because Cyclops arrived or was that just a coincidental thing? Was that Jubilee doing that? An unspecified amount of time later. The tower blows up and the Brotherhood terrorists leap off a bridge onto a Blackbird piloted by Cyclops and they fly away. Cut to Washington DC. Oh, come on. What is this? Jean's walking around with like a Bluetooth trying to get in contact with Cyclops while she wears a red bathrobe and Wolverine's just lying on the bed drinking beers.
Really? You got McDonald's?
That's what you spring for when you're on essentially a fancy vacation in a very fancy hotel. You get [ __ ] McDonald's. Who are you? The president?
Then Jean gets back in bed and they [ __ ] Yep. They they just they go at it again. What the [ __ ] is happening in this book? At the White House, Xavier, Storm, Colossus, Beast, and Bobby get a tour because Wolverine and Gan are busy, and the group is told that there is one final mission left for the Sentinels before they get deactivated. An attack on the Savage Land. The group is told that the government has never been able to find the Savage Land before until a Blackbird was picked up on their satellites. Then a [ __ ] legion of Sentinels crash out of the ground somewhere and they fly to the Savage Land. Cut to the Savage Land. Magneto feeds a dinosaur as he talks to Cyclops about how terrible homo sapiens are compared to homo superiors who love all living things. Cyclops asks if Magneto loves those people who are getting scraped off the walls in London. So, Magneto recounts World War II. Playing the guilt card again, Cyclops says that he'll never kill for Magneto, and Magneto says that he would never ask him to because their perfect world will be here soon. They leave the palace and walk into the city. And oh, hey, look, it's Gambit. Magneto and Cyclops part ways, but before they do, this happens.
Oh, and Cyclops.
Yeah, this might sound like an unusual request, but if Quicksilver is around tonight, would you do me a favor and address me as father when we're standing in his presence? What?
What a petty [ __ ] Magneto is. Why do you do this? Why are you like this, you [ __ ] Elsewhere, Scarlet Witch and Quake Silver are sitting alone by a lake. Huh. I wonder what they were doing before this. Spoiler alert, incest.
Because that's what happens in the Ultimate Universe. Hulk's a rapist and the [ __ ] Scarlet Witch and Quicksilver are banging each other.
>> I wish incest porn had had a more mainstream appeal.
>> Then sentinels appear in the sky. They begin wreaking havoc and death and destruction, and they kill this woman and her baby. in. Then Magneto uses his powers to collect all the sentinels up and somehow change and reprogram them and change their prime directive to kill anyone who doesn't have a mutant gene.
Then Magneto flies away with the Sentinels. Cyclops radios into Professor X and explains the situation. Yeah, I guess yeah, he's the he was playing double agent this whole time. He he was uh undercover.
Uh, meanwhile, Gene launches Wolverine across the room because Wolverine told her his original goal was to murder Professor X after they had sex for the upteenth time. Wolverine says that, "Hey, hey, that's not that's not me anymore. That's not me. I turned for you, Genie, and I and I fell for Charles's ideas for a better future."
Then Professor X psychically alerts all of America and maybe the world. Then Professor X psychically alerts all of America about the reprogrammed fleet of sentinels that are on their way. Cyclops makes his way back to the Blackbird as Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch say he can't do anything now. It's too late.
Then Cyclops screams at Quicksilver and tells him to stand up for himself for once in his life. Then the Sentinels start wrecking Washington DC as the X-Men try to fight him off. And at the burning White House, Magneto holds the naked president at his feet and prepares to drop the motorcade car on him, but then it splits in half and Charles Xavier appears behind Magneto. Then Magneto hits Charles with some car parts and pulls like 15 guns and some cameras on him. Then Wolverine stabs Magneto in the back. Symbolism.
Wolverine leaps over him and slashes his chest. Then Wolverine gets a metal pipe through his chest and thrown away and the White House explodes in a magnetic pulse that apparently overrides the nuclear arsenal of America. I guess elsewhere, Quicksilver appears before Marvel Girl and asks what's going on.
And she says what I just said, and he races away and steals Magneto's helmet, which allows Charles to enter Magneto's mind. Oh my god, this [ __ ] book.
And Magneto wretches in pain and screams, "Get out of my head, you stupid cripple." Then Charles turns Magneto into a giant super magnet. As Magneto begs for his life, Charles lifts the Magneto ball up into the atmosphere or stratosphere or whatever, and says, "Goodbye, my old friend. Give my regards to the dodo."
Later, the X-Men hang around the manor as Charles and Scott talk to one another. Charles says that eliminating the Sentinels, opening the door to Magneto's brotherhood, and gaining the trust of Homo Sapiens was just phase one of the plan. Phase two will be much more interesting. Released in 2001, written by Mark Miller with art by Adam Cubert, Tom Durick, and Tom Rainey. This is Ultimate X-Men volume 2: Return to Weapon X. The book begins at Weapon X headquarters, which is in Finland for some reason. In this universe, the facility is on high alert due to a recent escape by a certain tridactyl mutant, Nightcrawler, who in the Ultimate Universe is a brimstone black demon instead of a lovable blue demon.
He's also going to be revealed to be homophobic later. Anyway, Nightcrawler guns down these Weapon X soldiers, steals a snowmobile, and is chased to the edge of a snowy cliff. He ramps off the precipice and explodes into a teleportation bump. The soldiers continue tracking him and he is shot by a tran dart by Colonel John Wraith, who you might recognize as being played by Willam in the X-Men Origins movie. That was him. Wraith and the soldiers make their way to Nightcrawler, and Wraith kicks him in the jaw and orders his men to take him back to base and burn the soles of his feet. Then make Nightcrawler watch them torture the girl in the cell next to him. Jesus Christ.
Wraith then lights a cigar and complains that discipline has been far too relaxed around here. Then he turns and reveals that Weapon X is a part of SHIELD. It's like a It's like a black ops counterterrorism division made through SHIELD. Kind of like what X Force becomes in the mainstream Marvel universe, but far worse because it's Ultimate Marvel. Uh essentially what happens is that Shield and Weapon X kidnap mutants, torture them into subservient, and turn them into living weapons for America. God bless. Cut to an abandoned Weapon X facility in Arizona. Wolverine, with the help of Professor Charles Xavier, has been tracking down Weapon X for the past few months. Xavier wonders if the president was true to his word on shutting down state funed mutant GitO. And Wolverine looks at a wall marred with dried blood and graffiti and says there ain't a chance. Sounds a bit familiar, right?
Almost like we've seen this exact scenario play out in some sort of feature film. Cut to Tokyo. Cyclops, Storm, and Colossus are interviewed on a talk show. Colossus explains that they're here in Japan to highlight the plight of genetic prisoners in China and South Korea. Then they start discussing Professor X and his school for gifted youngsters, and Colossus goes into the fact that mutants are just humans with an activated X Factor gene. After the show, the trio leave and are met by a giant crowd of fans. As they sign autographs, Nightcrawler and another make their way through the crowd. Gee whiz, I wonder who this is. taking off their glove. Colossus is touched by a feminine hand and then Cyclops beams them up into the blackbird and they take off. Sometime later, Cyclops and Wolverine break into a Russian mobster's safe house. And doesn't this prostitute look like a Frank Miller drawing? This is This is totally a Frank Miller swipe, right? Just look at it. The pose and the superarchched back, the hard lines, the overall shape just screams Frank Miller.
The example I can think of and really the only one I found is from Holy Terror, but I guarantee Miller has done this in other books, too. Anyway, Wolverine and Cyclops are here to tell this Russian mobster to leave Peter Rasputin alone. Wolverine lights his cigar and slices the boss's gun in pieces and suggests that they renegotiate Peter's contract with the Russian mob. Later, Wolverine and Cyclops sit in traffic and Wolverine is wearing an American flag bandana, which I can only assume he stole from that Russian guy. And Cyclops says that Professor X isn't going to be happy about them using their powers to push around ordinary people. Wolverine tells him he doesn't give a [ __ ] All they did was cut a loose end that would have otherwise been a problem for him.
Cyclops asks why Logan is moving on again, and Logan goes into telling Scott that he doesn't like that the X-Men don't understandably trust him, and he doesn't want to get attached to Professor X's school and dreams of mutant human peace. Elsewhere in New York, Storm and Hank go on a picnic date. And later, Bobby Drake returns from his brief vacation with his family.
And Xavier telepathically radios into Gan that he returned with a problem.
Turns out Bobby found himself a girlfriend when he was gone. And well, he just about told her everything about the X-Men. So, you can only imagine what Xavier is going to do. He suggests erasing the entire conversation from both the kids' minds, but is worried about the ethics. Wow, I did not see that coming. I figured he'd just do it.
If I could snap, I would. Maybe I'll add a sound effect. Wow, I did not see that coming. I figured he'd just snap.
>> Do it. If I could snap, I would. Maybe I'll add a sound effect. Snap. Jean sternly says that Bobby knew what he was doing and that they need to protect themselves. So, Charles wipes Bobby's mind and the girls. Okay, but like, why even bother asking? Like, you know, this is clearly a situation where he knew how Gan would answer. So, did he just want to justify it by having someone else agree with him? Did he want the like escapegoat of Jean in case Bobby found out or something? Like, well, Jean told me to do it. Later that night, Bobby and Colossus hit the gym as the others eat some dinner, unaware of the soldiers making their way around the school.
Then, the power goes out and the mansion is assaulted. Definitely feel like I've seen this in a feature film somewhere.
You know, I'm starting to think movie studios have always just stolen from comic books. Ah, that's crazy talk.
I'm sure it's just a coincidence that this came out about 3 years before X2 X-Men United. In upstate New York, the ultimate version of Juggernaut looks like this. And he has captured Beast.
Saber-tooth walks into the house as Storm slowly lifts herself up and prepares to bash her head in when Beast attacks him. Okay. So, I guess this other blackhaired giant man was Colossus who left the manor to go to a gas station at that same place that Beast and Storm were at, but we didn't see that happen. And there's that billboard of Spider-Man, the Got Milk SP, the Got Milk Spider-Man billboard ad signifying it's around the same area.
Huh. Moving on. Cyclops has had the chance to get up and unleashes his laser beam vision. But so Nightcrawler appears and swipes his visor and then bashes his head with a frying pan. Wraith demands a situp on Wolverine. But Saber-Tooth says Wolverine is not here and he hasn't been for quite a while. Iceman then makes his presence known, having frozen Saber-tooth and all the other soldiers.
But then Rogue steals Jean's powers and mine whamies Bobby, who's promptly tranquilized. They remove the mutants from the manor and promptly light it ablaze. Oh, hey, look. The mansion's destroyed, just like in the movie. Ray then notices that his men have drawn a little circle with an eight inside of it on Xavier's head and says, "I just wish you were awake to see all your hopes and dreams go in smoke like this, Charlie boy.
All that fancy talk about human mutant integration, how you've got the president on your side.
There's a war going on out there and your boys and girls just joined the competition.
Cut to Delhi. Colonel Nick Fury floats down to the ground via his pair of shoes and makes his way to a temple. One thing I do like about I guess this issue of Ultimate X-Men is that it depicts Nick Fury using all these crazy gadgets and stuff. It's really neat to see and I'm really surprised that Marvel never made an Ultimate Nick Fury series or at least a miniseries or something. The only thing he got that's really close to that is probably Ultimate Origins, which [ __ ] sucks. Anyway, Fury makes his way to the temple and tells the temple master that he's here looking for an illegal genetics operation that's in violation of the superhuman test ban treaty. Then all the monks stand up armed with bullpup assault rifles and Fury touches his sunglasses and vaporizes everyone in the room. He makes his way down a secret stairway and into a high-tech facility, gets cornered when some scientists come towards him, so he activates his intangible waste coat to phase through a wall and ends up in a room full of armed guards. They open fire and Fury goes invisible before quickly gunning them all down. Finally, he spits some explosive chewing gum at a large vault door and discovers something inside a blinding light. He orders a dozen agents armed to the teeth down here immediately and says they have to torch the place before being cut off. At the Weapon X facility, General Thaddius Thunderbolt Ross speaks to Wraith about Fury discovering the base, being neutralized, and subsequently kidnapped.
Ross tells Wraith they need Fury back ASAP and they want the man who is behind the Indian mutant genome working for SHIELD by midnight. Wraith smiles and says that they have some great new recruits to send on the job. And Ross freaks out that Wraith has kidnapped the [ __ ] X-Men, aka the people who saved and are on firstname terms with the president. Wraith says Xavier was the only one with the line to the president and they already shot him. Sweet Lord, this just gets worse and worse. I can't create a shield response unit from a 14-year-old teleporter, a human juggernaut, a Marilyn Manson fan who can kill you if she touches you, and a poor man's Wolverine. What? I'm sorry, Sabertooth, but it's true. Then Wraith shows him the operating room. Dr. Cornelius is busy at work modifying the beast to maximize his strength and agility. Ross tries to see the the bright light through the this dark tunnel and says, "Oh, hey, at least we got Wolverine, right? That's the whole point, right? You raided the X-Mansion to get Wolverine back and you sort of just stole the other ones with you, right?" And Wraith sheepishly says that Wolverine was the only one that they didn't manage to capture. Ross then puts on his coat and storms out, ordering Wraith to do his goddamn job and get Fury back. In the holding cells, Juggernaut and Rogue bicker with Colossus and Storm about Magneto and the mutant kind. Cyclops says that he already has three escape plans formulated and that once the president hears they're being held against their will, soldiers will be all over this place. Juggernaut laughs and says that the last hope they had of escape was executed by Professor X on the White House lawn. Get out of my head, you stupid [ __ ] Then there's this scene which is Jean and Nightcrawler inside his mind and specifically one of his happy memories from childhood and he's blue for some reason and like Jean's like trying to communicate with him cuz he doesn't speak English. She only speaks German and they make a joke about Nightcrawler picturing her in her underwear. Haha. Are they just going to [ __ ] make that joke every goddamn time she shows up? They already did it in Spider-Man and and they did it in the first volume, too. Back at Weapon X, Cornelius asks Wraith why he told Ross that Xavier is dead. Wraith says that Weapon X is getting shut down by the pansies in Washington. And Ross has had his mind all turned around. But Xavier is a wild card in case the game turns against them. Then he picks up the Cerebro helmet and suggests using Xavier's mutant location equipment to track down the Brotherhood, specifically Wolverine. It's just like I'm getting deja vu or something. Elsewhere, Wolverine walks through a blizzard.
Sometime later, team A emerges at a secret genetic base in India.
Nightcrawler teleports inside and screws up the security system to open the main doors. Then, Cyclops blasts the guards, and the team begins their mission.
Elsewhere in the country, Nick Fury awakens aboard a train, is interrogated by a military leader. Outside and above, team B arrive. Iceman takes down the gunships guarding the train as Colossus prepares head-on on the tracks. And uh yeah, it's exactly what you'd expect to happen in this cool splash page. I dig the motion of the train being utterly destroyed, but I'm not really a fan of the like pose on Colossus. It's very static and stiff, which I guess is kind of the point to show like, hey, yeah, he barely did anything and this is the outcome. As the train passengers wallow in pain, Beast flies through and snatches up Nick Fury. And meanwhile at the genetic base, Cyclops and Nightcrawler discover what they came here to destroy. An organism built from 57 different varieties of mutant genes that is currently in its incubation stage. Cyclops has second thoughts about killing something with a pulse. And Wraith yells and says that the creature has 22 hearts, no brain waves, and is no more human than Cyclops or Nightcrawler, and orders him to pull that goddamn plug. Then some guards unload on the two and Nightcrawler knocks Cyclops out of the way. Unfortunately, this awakens the creature. Cyclops and Nightcrawler yell at each other because Scott only speaks English and Nightcrawler does not. And they simultaneously teleport and detonate the bomb, killing the monster and destroying half of the base.
Elsewhere, Storm and Gene attempt to entice the lead scientist into coming with them peacefully and work for Shield, but Wraith radios in to inform them that the plan has changed. You see, the doc's resume isn't quite what they're looking for anymore, and he orders Gene to kill him. Gene says that she won't kill, and Wraith explains that they have something to give her that little push in the right direction.
Nightcrawler and Cyclops appear, and Scott immediately topples over in pain.
I think I forgot to mention it earlier.
Uh, Weapon X have like Suicide Squad bombs in their brains. Wraith tells Marvel Girl that she has 15 seconds to make her choice. The boy she flirts with or a stranger willing to kill children.
And that's what we call irony. Scott cries out for her to not listen to him as the scientist begs for his life. Then she pops the man's brain and it spills out all over the floor and Gene begins to cry. Sometime later, the WeaponX team are returned to their cells. Gene and Scott embrace and Bobby wonders to Peter if they're going to die here and Peter tries to comfort him by saying, "Imagine you're the most dangerous mutant in the world. You're captured by a group of people who torture and abuse you until your body doesn't feel pain. Their doctors turn you into a walking switchblade. And every memory in your head is incinerated to free up battle plans and murder techniques. Imagine after years of being treated like an animal. You find people who treat you like a human being. You're happy for the first time in your life.
And when you least expect it, those people who turned you into a monster kidnap your new friends.
And you know what they're having to go through? I mean this, Bobby. Do you think there is a remote chance Wolverine isn't hunting us down to tear this place apart brick by brick? Remind me to never get dressed up and hit Vegas with you, Colossus.
Cuz we captured Wolverine 6 hours ago.
Believe it or not, we found him frozen in a snow drift and hit him with enough nape balm to hold off the Vietone.
Be honest, how stupid are you feeling right now?
Elsewhere in the base, Wraith and Cornelius make their way to the new operation they're beginning. Wraith is sure that Weapon X is back on the rails, but Cornelius isn't so positive. Anyway, they enter the chamber to find a worldclass expert in changing people's minds, Charles Xavier, who is hooked up with hundreds of cables and wearing X briefs. Where did he get those? Are those Weapon X themed or X-Men themed?
Flashback time. 11 years prior in Kuwait. Nick Fury and his troop are surrounded by Iraqi soldiers and he radios in for ground and air cover. His commanding officer, Colonel Wraith, says no dice. But then Fury tells them that the adamantium cage got shelled and it's loose. Then the Humvey Fury was taking cover behind is blown up. The Iraqis make their way down and start stripping the convoy of anything they can use. A group investigate the strange cage, unaware of the silhouette emerging behind them in the smoke and fire.
Wolverine brutalizes all of the soldiers and then stops and begins sniffing wildly. Then he makes his way to Nick Fury, who had been trying to hold his breath. And Fury tells the beast that he's not afraid of dying. He just asks that Wolverine kill him below the neck so his mother can have an easier time identifying the body, what with one of his eyes now missing. And later that night, Wraith is alerted that his men have finally found Wolverine. He's slowly walking towards their base with Fury on his shoulders. Wolverine collapses into the dirt and Wraith races out and pops a few rounds into him before medical team arrives to bandage Fury's eye wound and loads him to the infirmary. One night ago, Nick Fury returned to his New York apartment and listens to his voicemail. His AI assistant plays the first message, a voice Fury hasn't heard in years. And back in Finland, Jean speaks to Wolverine. She tells him that after being here for 6 weeks, she understands why he is the way he is. Oh my god. I just I I don't care. I do not care.
Ultimate Wolverine is a [ __ ] piece of [ __ ] In the future, he is going to get mind swapped with Peter Parker and then in Peter Parker's body, he's going to try and bang Mary Jane Watson. If this wasn't the Ultimate Universe, I'd probably be a little more interested and feel more for what the X-Men and Wolverine are going through. But it's not. It's the ultimate X-Men and they're all pretty much terrible, hypocritical, selfish pieces of [ __ ] Anyway, Wraith has a video call with General Ross and a bunch of other military leaders in which he reveals that Charles Xavier is still alive and has been hooked directly into a new Cereb Bro system that can now enhance his powers by a thousand times over. Ross demands to know what Wraith is planning and Wraith tells him that he's taking control of Shield and making sure the world is safe from the threat of mutants. Then he detonates a bomb in the general's conference room, killing them all. I guess they snuck the bomb in. I I doubt that Xavier was the one that do it. Did he Did he blow him up via the power of thought? In the Netherlands, Saber-Tooth and some Weapon X soldiers hold Wolverine at gunpoint.
One of them sets up a little grill which is loaded with 376 pages of classified documents on the man now known as Cename Wolverine. Dossier contains everything from Logan's earliest days in school to the day Weapon X got him. Then Saber-tooth ignites it and Wolverine is gunned down. Simultaneously, back at Weapon X, Dr. Cornelius discovers an abnormality in Wolverine's medical scans, and Wraith realizes that what was inside Logan's intestine is a tracking device. A massive explosion then blazes the night. The power of the base goes out completely and the mutants emerge from their cells. And then the Brotherhood of Mutants appears. Also, Scarlet Witch removed all their brain bombs. Saber-Tooth rips four claws out of his hands as the soldiers return to base. And Logan makes fun of him for overcompensating. And back at base, the X-Men, Brotherhood, and Weapon X mutants bring down hell. Wraith demands Cornelius use Xavier to give them all aneurysms, but without any power, there's nothing they can do to order him around. There's also nothing keeping him under control from the neural clamps they installed either. So Wraith just whips out his handgun and shoots Xavier.
Cornelius points out how [ __ ] stupid that was since Xavier was the one thing they had going for them in way of oh, I don't know, not getting their heads ripped off by a bunch of angry mutants.
But Wraith storms off and orders himself an evac. Meanwhile, Logan taunts Saber-tooth some more and eventually gets cut free and they begin a brutal fight in the snow. Beast leaps down the halls hunting down Cornelius to gain vengeance for what he did to him. And when he finally finds the good doctor, Cornelius tells Hank McCoy to shut the [ __ ] up and help him save Charles Xavier's life. Anyway, Wolverine and Saber-Tooth keep fighting, but now they tumble down a mountain. Wolverine slices his six claws straight across Saber-Tooth's face, and Saber-Tooth launches Logan into a tree. Then he drags him to a river, holds him beneath the water. Look at us, Wolverine. Super people are supposed to be the next stage in human evolution, but all we do is fight each other. We're nothing but trash. And I don't know about you, but I'm getting tired of the itchy scratching garbage. I slash you, you slash me, then we heal and get better.
That's why it struck me that drowning you might be the one way to finish it.
How does a healing factor fix a suffocated brain? Huh?
Hear that pumping noise? That's your brain cells exploding.
At least I got enough brains to cover my family jewels in a fight. Say good night.
Oh god. Back at the base, the mutants continue wreaking havoc and Blob holds on to the helicopter that Wraith was trying to escape in. And you may notice that the art looks a little different here. No, this is not a new issue. It's just the fact that this book has two artists and three different inkers for some reason. Colossus prepares to bring down the loadbearing pillars of the Weapon X facility, but finds that he can't do it for some reason. And Gene emerges, revealing that she won't let him or any of the others kill all the people inside. And Wraith is like, "Forget those idiots in the canteen, Marvel girl. This psychopath says he's going to eat me." Which is true. The blob is a [ __ ] cannibal. In the few years time, he is going to devour the corpse of Janet Van Dy and say it tastes like chicken. Scott asks how she can stop this after what happened to them and she's like, "We call ourselves homo superior, remember?" Rogue then tries to take her down, but Bobby freezes her hand and she's like, "You [ __ ] My hand hurts. It's cold." Cyclops loses his blood lust, which for some reason I wrote in the script is bloodthirst. I don't think that's a I don't think that's a word. And thanks Scarlet Witch for helping them escape, but asks the Brotherhood to stand down and let them finish this the X-Men way. In the moment, Wraith is able to escape Blob's clutches, and Storm goes crazy and blows up his chopper, but not before Nightcrawler teleports Wraith out and back to the base. Wraith leaps up and prepares to blast Nightcrawler and the others, but he's gunned down by Nick Fury, who is leading a charge of several hundred Shield of Soldiers. Fury calms everyone down and tells the mutants that they're all free to go. Scarlet Witch asks why, and then Logan appears and thanks Nick for saving the kids the same way Nick saved him. Sometime later, Professor X is recuperating and tells Gene that he's proud of what she did.
they can't kill, especially when they need to act as a catalyst in the human mutant relations. This is like the briefest moment of kindness that you'll ever see ultimate Charles Xavier ever exhibit. Gene says that she's disappointed that the Weapon X mutants decided to join the Brotherhood, but Xavier says it's only a matter of time.
Hell, they even got Nightcrawler to agree once he returns from Bavaria to join them here with Magneto and the others. And Jean freaks out because Xavier killed Magneto. And Xavier, as he slowly falls asleep under all the medication he's on, tells her that he never said he killed Magneto. And then he falls asleep as Jean tries to wake him back up.
Released in 2002, written by Mark Miller and Chuck Austin for two issues with art by Adam Cubert and Chris Bakalo and Assad Riick for two issues. This is X-Men volume 3 world tour and this begins in a really weird place. The first two issues of this volume introduce none other than the persuasion again.
And it adds nothing to any of the other issues or the story arc in this volume.
It just says, "Hey, Gambit's an all right guy. He saves this little girl whose parents were murdered by criminals. Also, mutants exist outside of the X-Men and whatever Magnetoino was doing in the Savage Land with his incestuous kids. And it doesn't matter really because Gambit won't be back into the series until 2005 in issue 50. So, with that out of the way, the actual story line doesn't begin until the fourth issue in this volume because Ultimate X-Men 15 is a weird word processor recap of the state of the world and what it's like for mutants. It's a It's for an article. It's an episttolary story because it's being written by one of the characters. And here we go. It starts off with a classic high school graduation speech. The Oxford English dictionary describes mutation as blah blah blah blah blah. Guess who's writing this? The answer may surprise you. We see the X-Men living their lives at the mansion. They play baseball because hey, that's something that people love in the mainstream universe and it's an X-Men classic. I really hope that the first post KCOA X-Men story opens up with the group playing baseball. Gan Gray aka Marvel Girl has also been using her psychic powers to assist mental institutions as well as the police in finding missing persons. The school itself is also growing larger as Storm, Cyclops, and others work on better controlling their powers and gaining a proper education. And Beast, well, Beast continues his passion for research into an alternative to expensive pharmaceuticals and also starts chatting with a girl online. And Wolverine and Colossus have also struck up a friendship. But in the world outside of the mansion in the school, mutant culture scares the values of humanity.
Spike Lelay is also making a magneto biopic. Boliviver Trass goes on television to expand upon his theory that mutants are inherently cruel due to their evolution. And the Brotherhood of Mutants has reemerged and recently bombed the Japanese financial district.
And eventually, sometime in the fall or winter, I think, Xavier goes to the park with Colossus. And it's there that he reveals to Peter that Magneto is still alive, living out his life with no memory of who he truly is or what he's done. Magneto now thinks that he's just regular Eric Lenture, a teacher from the Bronx. Also, Cyclops and Toad are still friends. Like because in the first volume, Cyclops goes undercover with Magneto's group. And I guess these two just struck up a friendship and now they still chat on the phone, but I feel like that shouldn't be happening. Xavier shouldn't let them do that because, you know, Toad is part of a terrorist group.
Also, it's revealed that the girl that Beast was talking to is actually the blob catfishing him. And now in present day, Xavier sits on the back patio watching the sunset as Bobby Drake arrives to inform him that the magazine that Xavier wrote the article for claimed it was too promutant and did not run it. Then sometime later, a ship is found off the coast of Scotland by some police or whatever. And inside they find a plethora of mangled bodies and the captain orders that Dr. McTagert be alerted that the crew is dead and her son is nowhere to be found. But then they discover a survivor. The captain orders everyone to move back and cover their eyes. And the captain pleads with David McTagert to come with them because he can't survive 24 hours away from his mother's hospital. And then the man's eyes glow green as the captain realizes what's being done to him. The captain then guns down all of his men, blasting one over the side. Then he takes a running start and jumps to shore and makes his way in land. Cut to jolly old London in it. Two days earlier, Gan and Auroro rollerblade through the streets as they're in London to promote Charles Xavier's new book. He's going on an international tour, hence the title X-Men World Tour. Anyway, Gene notices a woman carrying a loaded gun in a brown paper bag. Later that night in Soho, the X-Men hang out in a club as Bobby talks to his parents over the phone. Wait a minute. That newspaper title says Captain America Alive, meaning that these first three volumes at least of Ultimate X-Men take place before the Ultimates. Oh man, I got to go rearrange my chronological playlist. Anyway, Wolverine takes the phone and tries to talk to the parents who are freaking out that Bobb's overseas. And then they chastise Wolverine and he hangs up. Then Wolverine tells him to keep the phone away because they're on a drug bust and Wolverine wants to upstage Cyclops.
Elsewhere, Beast and Cyclops walk through the rain as they're trailed by a gang of ruffians. And two days later at the Ritz, Xavier calls their deadline to an end, and they take a look at how their superheroics have been reported by the press. Gene and Storm took down an IRA sale. Wolverine Colossus and Iceman busted an international drug ring. and Beast and Cyclops stop some muggers, which wasn't reported on, but Beast completed the Times crossword in record time. Storm makes fun of them, but Xavier says that Beast and Cyclops actually passed their assignment. Their goal with this exercise was to save lives. And Beast and Cyclops did just that by finding a peaceful way to help the gang members, even checking two of them into a rehab clinic. I did not form this school to train an army of thugs.
Iceman, how can I tour the world asking for change when my students are clinging to the politics of the ape man? I don't like prisons. I don't like capital punishment. I don't like mutants dropping carsized hailstones on unsuspecting Irishmen. Those who we interact with are all part of a species we're trying very hard to ingratiate ourselves with. Gaining the trust of homo sapiens as integral to our agenda.
My X-Men.
Phase 3 was designed to promote pacifist alternatives to traditional human problems.
Don't give them any more excuses to hate us. Later, after Xavier gives a presentation, which is met by a massive mob of anti-mutant humans, and a Molotov is set off, the X-Men head to their hotel, and the next day, Gene discovers that Colossus has checked out at 3:00 a.m. and left to the airport with a man and a woman. Beast asks what Xavier's thoughts on the situation are, but then he gets a call from Moira McTagert, who informs him that her hospital on Mir Island in Scotland has been destroyed.
Two agents of the British division of SHIELD called Strike have placed her under arrest and their son David has escaped. Sometime later at Mirror Island, the X-Men arrive and are greeted by Dr. McTagert. Well, all the X-Men except for Cyclops and Marvel Girl who are tracking down Colossus in Russia.
Moira then [ __ ] talks Xavier for not even being able to complain about her losing their son because he's currently in a translike state whilst he conducts an astral form search for David. Meaning that if he ever wants to just get out of a conversation or pretend like he doesn't know somebody's there so he doesn't have to talk to him, he can just have one of the X-Men say that he is in a a trans astral projection form while Xavier just sort of sits there.
Moira and her employees then lead the X-Men into the hospital. Moira reveals that this facility is actually a few months older than the New York operation of Xavier's and that the people who fund Charles's work hope that some of the people here will graduate to the Westchester facility. Storm brings up that Xavier told them that he got all that equipment and the mansion from his parents. And Moira just laughs in her face that they fell for the inheritance gimmick. and Wolverine demands to know why the hell they're all here and who David is. So, she explains that David's exgene powers didn't manifest until a few days after Xavier left them to found the Savage Lang Sanctuary with Magneto.
David's minimal control of his powers caused his body to deteriorate at the slightest use of his abilities, meaning that Moira had to keep him sedated and under careful monitoring for years. But last night, he began convulsing and transferred his consciousness into a doctor's body. Moira doubts that it was a coincidence that all this happened at the same time of Xavier returning to Britain. Then two agents from the SHIELD UK division strike appear. Agents Bradock and Thomas. Yep. This is the ultimate Betsy Bradock aka Psylock.
Iceman asks who the heck Strike are, and Agent Thomas explains that they're a part of Shield. Specifically, they're here because Betsy is a side division agent. And then he tells the young Ice boy to picture him as a real life Welsh James Bond. Bobby asks who the hell the Welsh are. And Betsy tells him that they're like the Irish without the laughs or the Scots without the sex appeal.
Excuse me, have you not seen Alex Jones?
Not her worth, of course, but come on, who doesn't love a Welsh accent? I was going to try to do one until I realized I absolutely cannot. Anyway, Xavier wakes up in that moment and alerts everyone that David is in Aberdine. Cut two. A Burger King in Aberdeen. The boiling ruinous body of the police captain shuffles into the shop and orders a large fry, two cheeseburgers, and an ice cream before crumpling over in pain as he cries out that he can't think straight. And outside, Xavier and the others stand guard with Xavier telepathically ordering his son to stay calm and relax. just close his eyes because before he knows it, he'll be back home with mom. Wolverine heads in first, but outside the ground erupts and Xavier is launched into the sky and backed into the ground. Then Wolverine turns around and discovers that the other patrons have all been emulated.
Wolverine snicks his claws through David, but David is able to take over his mind. Outside, Betsy alerts the others that she lost telepathic contact with Logan. And then he explodes to the roof and lands on the XJet as David chests that he's found a brand new home in this unkillable body. But this being an amalgamation of both David Holler aka Legion and Kevin Matagert aka Proteius, he also has reality warping powers and locks Beast in a cage of an ethereal freak show. He equally defeats Iceman with demonic hallucinations of Magneto and the Brotherhood before Storm strikes him directly with a lightning bolt and Betsy launches a psychic grenade into his brain, but he manages to escape, leaping away into a road where he's struck by a Lori, but not before he swaps consciousness with a driver. The truck slams over Wolverine and continues speeding away. This episode is brought to you by my Patreon and my comics, Destru Boy and the Custodians, Agents of Cross. Each issue of the custodians Agents of Cross is over 60 pages of pure comics written, illustrated, colored, lettered, designed. Everything you see in these books was created entirely by myself. And this asks the allimportant question, what if the only heroes that can save the world are an intelligent baboon, a girl who controls fire, the world's smartest man with the power of elasticity only in his right arm, and a forarmed werewolf.
And this just follows their exploits.
Like I said, it is a love letter to the 60s, Silver Age, and to all of comics in general, as you'll see as the series progresses to its sixth and final issue.
This entire first issue, however, is posted in its entirety on my Patreon, patreon.com/smokiesvideos, where you can read the entire thing for only two bucks. Normally, this book I sell it for $15, which already is a far better deal than anything you're getting from Marvel or DC these days, but as little as $2 a month, you can get access to the entire issue. And I am serializing issue two as we speak. But that's not all because I also have my sci-fi zany, just crazy fun series, fun for the whole family, all age comic, Destru Boy. Destructive Boy follows this little robot guy right here as he lives on a giant space station in the far-flung future. And he battles crime, giant robots, giant monsters, and evil conquerors from space such as Grimlax, the Astro Knight. Each of these issues just introduces as much zany sci-fi craziness as I can fit into these books.
They're being serialized on my Patreon as I speak as well, and you can pick up all five issues on my Etsy shop, blake t-w.etsy.com. Meanwhile, in St. Petersburg, Russia, Scott and Gene locate Peter near his apartment complex, and he explains that he's tired of being ignored, underappreciated, and he's especially sick of Xavier's pacifist ideas. And then he walks away. Later in Berlin, the X-Men and Strike agents continue tracking down David, much to the chagrin of Bobby and Storm, who would rather be chilling out on an international book tour in highclass hotels and beaches. And Bobby also notes that SHIELD is apparently sending out their new super team, the Ultimates, which means that this happens.
It's like pretty much during the Ultimates one.
Probably I'm so confused. Where do I put these videos? Anyway, Professor X and Betsy strike up a conversation and kind of flirt around, which is weird, but not for the reasons that you think. And eventually, they do go out to a dinner where Xavier recounts his ex-wife and their marriage. He tells Betsy how he graduated from Glasgow University. No, he is not from the UK. Xavier is an American, just like in the mainstream comic universe. He just went to school there and he got married to Moira 3 weeks later. Moira then designed an early version of Cerebro and they established a very rudimentary institute at Mirror Island and eventually they met Eric Lenture aka the man who would one day be known as Magneto. They instantly hit it off and became almost like brothers. Xavier notes that there wasn't really one catalyst that caused him to leave his family. It's kind of just a slow and steady process of sadness. When he did leave, however, he thought he was doing his family good and that they wouldn't really miss him. And that's when he and Eric founded their small island in the southern hemisphere, the Savage Land Sanctuary, which is not its official name. That's just what I call it. And that's where things fell apart.
Magneto left Xavier crippled. Ex investors approached Xavier to fund his school in New York. And the rest is history, aka volumes one and two. Betsy asks if Xavier feels responsible for David, that perhaps his leaving is what caused David's powers to begin. And Xavier says, >> "Not really. They were going to happen anyway." Of course, what I do feel guilty about was not being there to guide him at an age when I think he needed me most. I had no shortage of love for my son. You know, like an owner's love for a pet sometimes, but love nonetheless. So close. We were so close to not having to put this video in my Professor X is a terrible person playlist.
I mean, it's pretty bad what he did to Moira and David, you know, leaving his family, but he could have redeemed himself. He's not going to, but he could have. Also, I'm not going to cover it just for the sake of the length of this video, but the whole Colossus storyline revolves around Gan and Scott trying to convince him to help save a sunken submarine. Colossus refuses until one night he's with his family and the news flips on and they're discussing the event and how time is running out for the members and Colossus has a change of heart when his younger siblings sort of look up to him and ask him if he's going to save the day. And he goes and lifts the submarine from the ocean floor.
Anyway, still in Berlin, the X-Men and Betsy search for David. The X-Men drive around in the middle of the night to pick up Colossus, Gene, and Scott from the airport. And Storm wonders if Xavier ever messes with their minds.
He has and he does. He's a terrible person. I have a whole playlist about it. The next episode of What is is all about it. Anyway, Bobby points out that every time they do go into battle with Xavier's creepy psycho son, or even any villain that's not a two-bit criminal, he loses his lunch. And Beast remarks that, "Hey, maybe Xavier's giving him the jitters so they can have that exact argument be made." Wolverine then tells everyone to shut the hell up because there's someone in the road ahead of them. Betsy Bradic, currently under the control of David McTagert, carrying his mother, father, and a dog. David then calls them all idiots and pulls a Sam Rice.
>> I've been here the whole time. And then Betsy, David shifts into this weird knockoff pin head from Hellraiser. Look.
What? What is this? Why does this look so familiar? What am I thinking of? I'm It's It's got to be a comic. I just I can't remember. He almost looks like Trencher or one of those characters, but this just looks like something that I can't think of. So, let me know if you have any ideas in the comments.
Wolverine orders everyone to get the hell out of the car and tries to slam the car into David, but David launches it into a pub and then laughs maniacally. Beast leaps into action and David throws him through a window and into a room where three attractive young women, a teacher, and the two hottest girls that he knew in high school are waiting for him. David says that he can give Beast a reality where all of this X-Men stuff never happened. A place where he can be happy and normal and get with any girl he wants. All he has to do is help him kill the others. Beast refuses and David then pummel him to a pulp as Storm erupts her powers at him and Iceman forms into a massive frozen monster of himself only to be slammed through by two vehicles. Then Cyclops and Gene arrive and Cyclops blasts David into a cinder. But it doesn't last and David begins tearing them apart. Then he teleports himself and Xavier and the dog around the world to the various stops on Xavier's book tour, exploding each location. Paris, Madrid, Rome, Sydney.
Around the world, hundreds are suddenly dead. And as David prepares to make it, thousands. Betsy regains control. She reveals that she's been systematically shortcircuiting his brain, and now she's shutting him down for good. David fights back as his form falls apart. Reality is torn to. Betsy tells Xavier that she can't get him, and that it's up to Charles, and she orders him to give her a blood clot to the brain.
And here's where the plan goes to pieces. You English witch. You forgot you were dealing with Donald right here, didn't you?
He never had an egg on his pit.
Professor, please. You're never going to get another chance. I can't hold him back.
>> He's right.
I'm sorry. I I can't.
>> Just shut up and kill me.
>> My pleasure.
Sometime later at a graveyard on Mirror Island, the X-Men and Moira attend the funeral of David McTagard. Xavier and Moira then walk away as General Nick Fury waits to speak to them. And Xavier tells his ex-wife that he's realized just how young they are and what a terrible mistake this has all been. He explains that their son is dead. The only daughter of the Bradock family is dead. Bobby Drake is in an intensive care unit and his parents have withdrawn him and are suing Xavier and told the press that he is a negligent danger to all of his students. And he didn't even cry at his own son's funeral. He pledges that this is all over. And as soon as he and the X-Men return to New York, he's disbanding the team, his school, and his very idea for Mutant Kind forever.
Sometime later, the X-Men fight a group calling themselves the Acolytes in Auckland, New Zealand. While back in Westchester, New York, Professor X drafts a letter to Scott.
By the time you return from New Zealand, I will be gone. I apologize for not saying this to your face, but you know how we telepaths are with verbal confrontation.
I'm leaving because I failed. Failed as a husband, failed as a father, failed as a teacher.
My books and lectures told the world how man and mutant could live in harmony.
But I now realize I was wrong.
Only one species may sit at top the food chain because that is the natural order.
And I'm glad the New York election was cancelled.
I couldn't bring myself to spout my clap trap with Iceman in a hospital bed.
I'm glad new terror groups have formed because what right did I have to subvert the ideals of the brotherhood?
My biggest conceit was the psychic rehabilitation of Magneto I intended.
In retrospect, it's mind-boggling to think that I could make a man forget who he was in a vague hope that he might one day come to my way of thinking.
That's why I plan to remove those blocks this afternoon. It's clear to me now that Magneto must be freed and nature allowed to take her course.
Excuse me. You're Charles Xavier, aren't you? I'm Why do you say that? Oh, come on. You're in every newspaper and magazine in the world, and no offense, but you're kind of a unique-l looking guy. I've actually seen you around here a lot lately. Do you happen to know one of the kids in my class? I I just come down to the park to clear away the cobwebs.
I just find it reassuring to know I'm not the only teacher in the world struggling to deal with disadvantaged youngsters.
You know, I never thought about it, but I suppose we really do have the same job. Of course, my kids don't save the world or anything. Uh, hey, listen. My name is Eric. Eric Lensure. I actually teach fourth grade at the Institute of Special Education in the Bronx. So, what are you doing here? Really? I thought the X-Men were in New Zealand fighting some faction of the Brotherhood of Mutants.
Yes, the students are, but it's their last mission under my jurisdiction.
As of midnight, I am closing the school.
Are you serious? Unfortunately. What about the whole pacifist mission you were telling people about in your book?
Why turn your back on it now? You're the man who claims to read the magazines and newspapers, Mr. Lure.
I'm sure you're aware of what happened, what my son committed.
You can't take the blame for something your son did, professor.
There's just as many papers out there saying how things could have been worse if the X-Men hadn't stopped him. That's precisely my point. I was on an international lecture tour promoting a nonviolent way of thinking and my students neutralize an opponent by crushing him under a car. What do you mean you're disappointed that Colossus resorted to murder? No, not at all. I'm starting to think he might have actually been right.
To be frank, I'm not sure what I believe anymore, Eric. Every other stage in evolution has been marked by bloodshed.
Why should the twilight of the homo sapiens be any different?
Perhaps Magneto was right. And I'm just nothing more than a romantic idealist.
My girlfriend actually read a thing online about Magneto and his tactics and how it was actually much more closer to a traditional human mindset. You know, smashing your opponents into submission is a pretty imperialistic idea for someone who claims to be the harbinger of a new golden dawn. And even the Brotherhood of Mutants are following your lead these days. Getting what they want through compromise and negotiation.
Wouldn't your quitting now just set everything back? I think you're rather overestimating my importance, Mr. Lure.
Look at me. Do I really strike you as the savior of the 21st century?
I might go around talking about psychic rehabilitation and posthuman economics, but I'm I'm really just an emotional vacuum. David's death proved what an unfit father I was. How could I be trusted to shape the minds of the next generation when I couldn't even raise my own child properly?
I'm a fraud. Anyone who thinks that my ideas have any merit need their head examined. Well, to be frank myself, I kind of take that as an insult, professor. What are those? They're tickets to your lecture they canled. I'm hanging on to them just in case they change their minds.
You bought those tickets.
You bought those of your own free will.
At $49 a pop, it's quite hard to believe. I know.
>> Professor, are you okay? Thank you, Eric.
Thank you so very much.
Later that night, Xavier sits in his office and telepathically calls to the X-Men that class resumes officially tomorrow morning at 9:00 a.m.
Released in 2002, written by Mark Miller with art by Adam Cubert and K Andrews.
This is Ultimate X-Men volume 4, Hellfire and Brimstone. The book begins somewhere in the suburbs outside of New York City. And everyone's favorite petite Jewish girl, Kitty Pride, discusses with her friends their plan to trick their parents by saying that they're each sleeping over at the other's house so that they can all go to a party. Kitty says goodbye to the friends and heads up into her apartment where she finds her mom, who immediately calls her out on the sleepover that coincides with a boy at her school's parents going out of town. Her mom reminds her that she was also once 14.
Kitty calls her crazy and tells her to call her friend's parents. And Teresa Pride reveals she already did. And Kitty and her friend's plans have been foiled.
Kitty storms off and yells that her mom has ruined her life and her friends lives on top of it and tells her mother that she's not 4 years old anymore.
Teresa tells her to start acting like it. Kitty storms through the kitchen and finds the food that her mom cooked, spaghetti and meatballs, and gets even more upset because she's a vegetarian.
and she picks up the plate and prepares to microwave it when it falls through her hands. And Kitty looks down as the glass shatters and realizes she's falling through the floor. She screams out for her mom and then plummets through into the bottom floor of the building, which this scene has a great gag. See that shirt right there on the bench at the foot of the bed? It says Miller's Plumbing. Well, what appeared in the first panel of this book parked right outside the apartment is a Miller's plumbing van. Kitty panics as the two in bed panic and she says that she won't tell the woman's husband about what she saw here today and then falls and stumbles through the wall. Then she appears outside panicking, still falling over herself and phases through the street as a bus drives towards her and into the sewers. Good thing the lizard and or man thing aren't here. Kitty then pulls out her phone, finds that it still works, and calls her mom and explains that it happened again. Later that night, after a long shower and some dinner, Kitty falls asleep in their living room as Teresa receives an email back from Charles Xavier. He invites her and Kitty to the school whenever they're able to to come meet about enrolling Kitty and having a tour. Sometime later, Gan Gray drives the Prides to the Westchester school and they arrive to find Professor Charles Xavier. Kitty is scared and shy and Professor X asserts that she is a mutant and they are all mutants here. So, she has nothing to worry about and they are not as frightening as the news claims them to be. He then goes on to explain that her gifts may be unpredictable, scary, or even dangerous. And he reassures her that he will help her train and hone and understand the powers that she has. Wow.
Is this going to be a Professor X appearance that I don't have to put in my Professor X is a jerk playlist? And then the two lead the prides into the school as Xavier heads to his office to speak with Teresa and Gene gives Kitty a tour. Kitty and Gene walk around as she explains how Professor X found her in a mental ward and the week before that he rescued Scott Summers from a lynch mob.
Then Gene goes on to explain how much Professor X has helped her control her powers. And apart from the occasional migraine or like her telekinetically moving some stuff in her bedroom as she sleeps, she is fine.
She's fine.
She's just fine. She's okay.
There's no worries. She's all right.
Don't look at it. Don't look at the title of this video. She's okay. Then Colossus shows up with Wolverine's corpse strung over his arm. They're returning from a joint effort with the NYPD to stop a drug ring that, get this, was using a telepathic mutant cranial fluids as an ingredient in the drug.
Colossus tells Kitty not to worry about Wolverine because his healing factor has already dealt with reforming all of the major organs that were damaged, and he should be waking up pretty soon. Then he tells Gene that they'll be in the danger room for their training. And then the duo passed the beast's room and Jean says that they won't be meeting him today because he recently broke up with his girlfriend Storm and he took what happened to the former X-Men Iceman kind of hard in the past volume that we just saw sometime recently with probably within the past month or two at the time of this book. Iceman was horribly wounded fighting Xavier's evil son and now his parents are suing the school and Charles Xavier. Kitty then asks the obvious question. Who the hell is paying for all of this stuff? Jean says that nobody's really sure, but all that they know is that the school is sponsored by a group of anonymous billionaires that somehow know the professor. And meanwhile, Professor X and Teresa have tea as they discuss Kitty's enrollment.
Teresa is unsure due to the violence, but Xavier notes that he finds that teaching children how to defend themselves is just as important as McBth or the quadratic formula. Teresa brings up what happened to Iceman and the current lawsuit. Then she says that she does not want Kitty to be involved with anything dangerous. She just wants her daughter to learn how to control her intangibility. She can only approve if Kitty is left out of the insane superhero missions. Later, the X-Men watches Colossus drives Kitty and Teresa home. And then Gene is alone and she spins around to see the Phoenix. She falls to the ground gasping and heaving and sweating profusely. She cries out for Charles Xavier and tells him that the visions are back. A month later in Pakistan, these horrible freaks called the animal evolutionaries who are either mutants who have very animalistic mutations or are animals who mutated.
kind of like the original idea for Wolverine where they wanted him to be an actual Wolverine that turned into a man because it was a mutant. I don't know what the deal is with these goddamn things because there's like no information about him online. It's very rarely brought up. The gorilla one seems to be an actual gorilla that turned into a man kind of. It doesn't matter.
They're going to die anyway. They invade a military compound with Quicksilver, Scarlet Witch, and whoever's left of the Brotherhood of Mutant Supremacy. Then they work on removing and casting into space the country's nuclear arsenal. And sometime later at a safe house, Quicksilver gives a message to the world regarding their disarming of both Pakistan and India's nuclear arsenals.
And he continues that their goals are not an altruistic disarming of the world. It's simply to show the power of the Brotherhood and their upcoming control of the human world. And the camera pans back and we see Blob behind the camera filming Quicksilver who demands that they run the auto quue a bit quicker. Blob tells him that he's speaking way too fast and he was hoping to slow him down to really get the message across. And then Quicksilver gets annoyed and orders them to reset to go again. Then the pro Simeon marches out of the room and complains that Quicksilver is an idiot. He sits down and continues to complain about Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch and says that they're too focused on their ceasefire with the X-Men and these missions about getting their faces into the public eye more so than they are about actually fighting. The dog man says that they should remain loyal, especially since Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch helped them break out of the test labs that they're prisoners in. Pro Simeon looks down at his friend, the centipede woman, and says that he didn't join the Brotherhood to be a some campaigner. He joined to bring blood and make heads roll and change the world.
And then whatever the [ __ ] this guy is notes that they outnumber the regular mutants now that Juggernaut and Rogue left with Toad and all the others.
Elsewhere at the Xavier Institute, Cyclops inspects, is that a picture of the Hawaiian coast? It doesn't matter because Kitty Pride shifts through the map table and asks what he thinks of the superhero name Shadow Cat. Scott tells her that she should be studying for her physics paper and she says that it bored her too much and she wanted to see what he was up to. And I don't know if it's just me reading this, but I kind of get the vibe that she kind of has a crush on Scott. It makes sense. You know, she's about the right age for hormones to be running a muck and like he's a handsome jack dude who's I don't even know how much older he is than her. Probably four to six years, I'd imagine. But like this sort of comes across like her trying to just be around him constantly. And this is probably something that Scott has had to deal with for the past month. Anyway, he explains that he and Colossus are going to be going on a mission to the Savage Land in the morning, and he's just trying to refamiliarize himself with the topography. And also, we now learn a bit of exposition about the uh Savage Land in the Ultimate Universe. I don't know if it's brought up before, but uh it's not in the Antarctic in this universe. It's like a South Asian island or something like that. I don't know where it is, but it's not the South Pole. It isn't just a regular kind of island that's far away from everything else. And at some point it's revealed that Wanda is the reason dinosaurs are there.
But currently, now that it has been abandoned by Magneto and the Brotherhood of Mutants, it's currently under the control of, I guess, the US military, probably Shield and the US military, who have just been stripping it apart and trying to rework anything of note that they have found there. Kitty then shows off her skills and asks if she can go with them because she's gotten really good with her phasing. Cyclops doesn't give a hoot in hell because she is restricted from missions into jungle hell holes. Then Wolverine rocks up.
Cyclops demands to know why he's here instead of in Boston with Storm helping to handle a hostage situation. Cyclops tells him that he better not smell alcohol in his breath as Wolverine lumbers towards him. Wolverine talks some [ __ ] Cyclops turns to leave. And then Wolverine notes that he can gut Scott before his little ruby glasses even hit the floor. So, yes, he probably has been drinking. Then he makes fun of Jean's headaches and says that ever since she and Scott started dating.
Then he asks if it's a coincidence or if she's missing some quote prime Canadian beef cake in her diet.
And then he walks up behind Scott and whispers in his ear that Jean really enjoyed the taste she had of it back in Washington and she'll be back for the main course pretty soon. What the [ __ ] is this?
God damn it, Mark Miller. I thought I was done with this. I thought we were over this. I thought you What? I thought the characters were growing and changing and becoming better. I thought it was becoming better and I was a [ __ ] fool. God almighty. Cyclops [ __ ] decks Wolverine and then orders Kitty Pride to alert the professor. Then Wolverine busts his ass and Scott blasts him through a wall. Scott walks slowly towards the dark rubble and Wolverine roars as he snicks his claws and tries to kill him. Then he falls to the ground unconscious and Professor X and the other X-Men arrive. Xavier demands to know what's going on. Then he appears in Scott's mind and informs him that he'll be placing them both in cerebral detention for the night and that they need to think about what they've done.
And he tells Scott that he is very disappointed. In the real world, Kitty cries out that something is wrong with Gan. And Gene lies in the fetal position screaming in terror. Horrible hallucinations of demons assault her mind. The next day, oh my god, what the [ __ ] What happened? I knew that the art changed, but I didn't realize it would be so drastic. And why does Beast look like he's posing for an Only Fans photo shoot? Uh, anyway, Kitty tells Beast that they're doing some training soon, and Beast tells her he's almost done with his critique of Carl Marx's DOS Capital, and that he'll be there soon.
She phases through the wall, and Beast quickly returns to his online chat with mutant chick421 atyahoo.net. Also, really, Beast, that's your email? Beast tells Mutant Chick that even though she's only been gone 48 hours for her lingerie shoot, he misses her and asks if they can finally meet in person for the first time. Mutant Chick messages him back and says that she's only recently discovered that she's a mutant and that she cannot bring herself to actually talk about it in person. And she apologizes for being so weak. Beast tells Mutant Chick, aka Naomi, that he understands completely. He He wears his heart on his horribly furry sleeve. Then we cut to the Brotherhood of Mutants hideout and discover that the beast has been catfished by the Blob. And as we'll see, I think Beast deserve to die in ultimatum. Blob did too, but for entirely different reasons. Elsewhere, Gene and Scott hang out within their minds. Gene tells him that even though she's had three psychic attacks in the span of 12 hours, she's hanging in there. And Gene tells him that this is nothing compared to what she went through at the hospital. And Scott tells her that he knows she's strong enough to make it through all this. She explains that this time whatever it is she's seeing feels like it's trying to break through to her. And Scott asks her what she means. And Jean then explains that she feels that she's been selected to host an ultradimensional entity that wants to access this reality so that it can annihilate everything like it has a billion worlds before. It also speaks to her in Latin and calls itself the phoenix and says that it is here to desecrate and unravel the entirety of existence. I mean, yeah, that pretty much covers it. She asks how much longer they have until they land and Scott explains that they're about 10 to 20 minutes away. He apologizes for leaving her when she really needs him and then he wakes up in the Blackbird. Meanwhile, dumbass Beast messages Naomi all the crazy [ __ ] that's happened at the school the past few days or weeks or whatever.
And how Wolverine and Cyclops are on a trip to the Savage Land to find some missing US Marines. And Blob works to equally torment and kind of radicalize Beast. Then Beast reveals that their secret sponsors sent a representative to help deal with Iceman's parents. Then he continues to explain that he knows who the mysterious financers are. And they call themselves the Hellfire Club. But that's not all, folks. Beast tells Naomi that Magneto is still alive and Blob calls everyone over and Pro Simeon orders him to convince the beast to meet in person. Cut to the Savage Land, aka the part of his book where the art and the coloring actually work very well.
Wolverine smells around the attack zone and deduces that the Marines are already dead, but they were killed and their bodies dragged away. So, the two set out into the jungle and eventually night falls and a T-Rex just kind of runs past them hunting some other dinosaurs. And then Kitty Pride freaks out and is found by Scott and Logan. She explains that she snuck aboard the plane before they took off. It's a regular Jurassic Park the Lost World situation. Cyclops orders her to head back to the plane and wait inside with the cloaking device activated. So, she reluctantly heads back. Later, Scott and Logan lower themselves. And this panel is [ __ ] great. Th I love this so much. I love the shapes, the colors, the design, the layout. This is my favorite thing of this volume that like this is what we could have had that past issue. That whole bit about Beast and Blob just totally wasted this artwork because 95% of this issue is action and movement and intrigue and it looks fantastic.
Wolverine and Cyclops move beneath the former city and argue back and forth.
They eventually arrive at a giant closed door that seeps with the smell of rotting flesh. Wolverine senses the rotting smell growing closer. Then they're attacked by zombie soldiers.
That's right, zombies are in this book now. Reanimated dead. Wolverine unleashes his berserker rage on the undead soldiers. And then dozens more arrive with guns. And a giant mechanical voice echoes through the dark corridors and notes that they will be shot and killed if they resist. Then the duo are led into the facility by the zombified soldiers where they come face to giant robotic monster face with the computer AI that used to keep Magneto's city up and running. You see, after the abandonment and dereliction of the city, the computer started to become self-aware and influenced by its creator, Magneto, it knew that it too had to evolve. Wolverine laughs off the idea of a mutant computer.
What's next? A giant dog man playing pool while a gorilla man sits and reads the newspaper next to a woman with the head of a woman and the body of a [ __ ] centipede. Don't be ridiculous.
Anyway, the computer explains that it rebuilt itself and began reanimating the dead somehow. Then the massive machine begins the short circuit and freaks out and [ __ ] explodes. Kitty Pride then phases through the ground and reveals that she accidentally phased through the machine as she was looking for Cyclops and Wolverine. Thus establishing an element of her powers that comes up quite often and that is that if Kitty phases through any piece of technology, it ruins it.
Cyclops orders Kitty to get the hell out of here as he and Wolverine then destroy the remaining zombie army. And meanwhile, in a high-rise in New York, a mysterious group all sit around a long table and drink wine and discuss Gan Gay's current status. The head of the table notes that her body is becoming accustomed to the idea of serving as a host and notes that alignment is only 48 hours away and thus decides that it is time for the Hellfire Club to finally meet the X-Men. The X-Men, Xavier, Gene, Colossus, and Storm all arrive at a massive gala held by the Hellfire Club.
They head inside and all split up and enter the massive gala. Gene and Storm break off, and Storm asks Gene how she's holding up. Gene tells her that she actually feels incredible. It's the best she's been in weeks. Although, she is a little worried about Scott in the Savage Land. The team goes around and meets all of the influential, famous celebrity guests as Xavier is brought away to meet the current Grandmaster of the Hellfire Club, Sebastian Shaw. Charles shakes his hand and thanks he and his associates for their financial assistance over these years. Shaw smiles and notes that they're just investing in the future.
Then they're brought some champagne and the two cheers to the future. Shaw leads Charles back out to the center of the room and calls everyone to focus their attention on the guests of the night. He goes on a spiel about how great the Hellfire Club, how long their history is, and how much they boast a proud background of charitable donations, and that tonight they are all here to honor Professor Charles Xavier and his Westchester school. He continues that there is another reason for meeting tonight, something that Charles isn't aware of. And then one of the Hellfire Club soldiers opens fire on Colossus.
Another shoots down Storm, and Shaw laughs in Charles's face that the whole thing was a facade. And then Xavier is shot out of his chair. Shaw then orders the three to be restrained and taken to the temple. Then he walks away with a despondent submissive Gan Gray. And sometime later, in a massive chamber in a dark burning ring dedicated to the Phoenix, which the Hellfire Club worships as a god because they're a [ __ ] cult. The three X-Men are tied to a big stone. As Sebastian and Gan stand in the center, Xavier awakens to all this and very calmly asks what the [ __ ] is going on. Sebastian begins a chant and prayer to the phoenix god and Jean erupts in fiery energy. He calls for the bright light of the phoenix to rise into the night to explode across the world and the phoenix breaks through reality and overtakes Jean Gray. And then she kind of turns into Gozer from Ghostbusters. Sebastian pleads his loyalty to the Phoenix and Phoenix demands to know why they dared to command a god.
Sebastian assures that the Phoenix misunderstands the whole situation. He wasn't attempting to bind it. No, no, no. He was simply summoning it here to do its bidding and follow it to greatness for all of eternity. And then the phoenix asks a very good question.
Why did they decide to use the spirit and soul of a host whose three friends they just betrayed? And all of the Hellfire Club members explode in fire and crumble to skeletons. Sebastian pleads with the Phoenix not to kill him, and the Phoenix laughs in his face and asks if he wants mercy like he planned to give to Jean Gay's friends. Then the Phoenix destroys the whole [ __ ] building in a big explosion. This frees the X-Men and the Phoenix disappears and Gene comes too. Colossus asks what the hell just happened and Gene looks down at her chest and sees the symbol of the phoenix now burned into her flesh like a tattoo. Then there's a call on one of their compact radios, a priority alert from the beast. Storm picks it up and Beast tells him that he went to go meet who he thought was Naomi but was actually the Brotherhood of mutants and that they know everything. They know that Magneto is alive and brainwashed and living in Queens. and he straight up lies and tells him that the Brotherhood had all these psychics ripping all the information out of his brain and he tried not to tell him he truly tried and he waits for them to come pick him up in an alley. As the X-Men leave the burning husk of the Hellfire Club throughout the city, metal objects lift up and enter the darkening overcast sky and it forms a message before plummeting back to the ground. And somewhere in a penthouse overlooking NYC, Magneto stands with the current members of the brotherhood. He asks who of them had the courage to go behind his children's back and rescue him. Prooon steps forward and reveals that he hatched the scheme himself.
Magneto walks with the ape man to the window. Magneto tells the Pimeian that he embodies everything that's wrong with the brotherhood in his absence. He's gross and doesn't make any sense. And then he launches a lamp through the Promian's chest and into his heart.
Magneto is then given his cloak and helmet and notes that the first order of business is to get funds and some better membership. Then he orders a message to be sent out to all previous members for their immediate return and apologies made to Magneto for failing him or else.
Then he tells the group that the treachery of his two children and their total incompetence will be made examples of. And he places his helmet on his head and says, "Tell them daddy's home." The end.
Released in 2002, written by Mark Miller with art by Chris Bakalo. This is Ultimate War. So, real quick, this story line takes place before Ultimate X-Men volume 6, Return of the King, in which we follow what happened immediately before this in Ultimate X-Men volume 4, when the beast of the X-Men was catfished by the blob into revealing to the Brotherhood of Mutants that the X-Men did not kill Magneto that fateful day back in volume 1. Instead, Charles Xavier brainwashed him and placed him into like a new life in Brooklyn. Maybe I'll get around to volume 6 someday. But I think that this volume does a concise enough leadup into where the universe goes that volume 6 is kind of unnecessary. Like they did this event crossover and then they did it again kind of with just focusing on Magneto.
Anyway, the story begins on the Brooklyn Bridge. There's been an 18-wheeler whose load of logs has toppled onto all the lanes, causing a major traffic jam and making the police have to back people up off of the bridge, which is going to take hours to clear. People just kind of amble around waiting to be able to move out of there. Then a massive explosion erupts and the fiery blast tears across the whole bridge, ripping brick from its levels and sundering the waters below.
And in Time Square, Magneto's image is televised along with a message that evolution has caused this to happen. He states that humanity has only six months to surrender the world to homo sapien superior. And later at the White House, Nick Fury meets with Dick Cheney regarding the situation and notes that as far as Shield is concerned, Magneto was executed 6 months ago, which means that everything that's happened at this point in the Ultimate X-Men happened in the past 6 months. Now, I suppose that makes sense, but you know me, I'm obsessed with this stuff and making everything fit together in a nice little box. So, I think that the leadup to the first volume of uh Ultimate Xen probably happens over the course of a couple months. You know, when when we're meeting the characters and Xavier's like kind of recruiting people, then it leads into, you know, Wolverine showing up.
He's there for a little bit. They get they learn to trust him, blah blah blah.
Then he kind of they learn he was sent there to kill Xavier. Whatever happened in that one, I barely remember. Then Magneto attacks Washington DC. That happens. we get volume two sometime after that. Maybe like a couple months later or a couple weeks later even. I think maybe like a month or two might make more sense cuz it takes a while to plan a world tour. And that's at a time when the X-Men, after they save Washington DC, after they save the president of the United States and destroy Magneto, quote unquote, uh they're worldwide sensations. And that leads into their affforementioned world tour, which concludes shortly before volume 3, Hellfire and Brimstone. Um maybe I'll give it another month or so.
And you know, Iceman gets [ __ ] up. His family sues Xavier. That's a long extensive thing that's happening. And by the time we see Iceman back in that volume, which I didn't actually show you guys, uh, he looks pretty fine. He's kind of back to normal for the most part. So, there must have been some like a couple months in between volumes at least from those two. This is all to say that I think it works out well that this is happening within 6 months, while say everything in Ultimate Spider-Man up to Harry Osborne turning into a goblin doesn't. Anyway, back to the thing he came here for. Nick Fury explains to Cheney that Xavier reported to them directly that Magneto was dead and that was the information Shield was working off of and subsequently the information the US worked off of. But he assures the VP that he has the ultimates working on it right now. And meanwhile on the banks of the East River, Thor and Iron Man work to remove the wreckage. Back over at the Triccllion, the Wasp hangs out in the situation room watching the news footage and working with Shield to conduct a manhunt for the Brotherhood of Mutants. And we also hear from her that Captain America took Black Widow and Hawkeye to follow up on some leads.
Elsewhere, in a hotel room, the Brotherhood of Mutants sit around and watch the news reports. Rogue panics when she hears from an anchor that the Ultimates have been called in to engage in searching for the mutants responsible for the attack, but Toad tells her to calm down cuz the news always says stuff like that to keep people calm and make them feel better. mastermind agrees and rhetorically asks how they could possibly track them down when they had the Vanisher and Hard Drive teleport them out of New York City. He tells everybody to stay calm and just wait until those two are able to fully teleport them further away. Then a gas bomb smashes through one of the windows and detonates and Captain America smashes through the rest of the window and [ __ ] demolishes them. Cap radios into Black Widow that Vanisher teleported away and she reports that she got him. Meanwhile, Rogue and Toad explode out of I just realized that rhymed.
Meanwhile, Rogue and Toad explode out of the seconds story balcony and land in the snow outside where Hawkeye orders them to stand down and surrender. So, this would mean that because it is presumably New York or maybe New Jersey based on the implications from their conversation that while Vanisher and Hard Drive did teleport them away, they didn't go far. they didn't get like several states over or something like that. They're not in like a different country. So that would mean that this is happening sometime probably December to February pushing it with a March I think since it's snowing in kind of the New York New Jersey area. And I think the fact that this book was released in December, we can say that it's happening in December the events of this issue.
The Ultimate X-Men volume 1 must have then happened earlier into the year.
Magneto would then attack the White House in June and everything since then has occurred within that intervening 6 months. Later that night at the Trickelling, Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch are brought inside and come across the Ultimates. Everyone quiets down and turns to look at the twins and Captain America invites them to take a seat.
Black Widow's a bit apprehensive about working with the two former leaders of the Brotherhood. Cap vouches for him and says that they have been providing information to Shield. Cap then begins to explain that their primary goal is capturing or killing Magneto. Cap continues and notes that SHIELD has been unable to contact Xavier and that Iron Man is currently leading a team there to investigate. Cut to Iron Man and the SHIELD agents heading inside of Xavier's school. Tony is fascinated by the camouflage technology that hides the building. Tony notes that the school appears to be totally empty, and in his opinion, it seems like it was abandoned in a rush. So, Iron Man heads inside and discovers the place totally emptied with leftover documents and equipments that they couldn't escape with scattered around. And Tony tells Cap that he thinks it looks like the X-Men jumped ship over to Magneto's side. Two days later at Pier 88 in NYC, aka one of the safe houses of the X-Men. That was a lot of letters strung together. I guess that's any sentence. Xavier speaks to his ex-wife Moira McTagard over a secure line and he asks her how their evacuation is going. She notes that it's not great because they lost all their equipment from Mir Island, but she's hoping that this will all just be temporary. Xavier agrees, hoping that they can bring Magneto to justice and get this all over with. And they mean notes that they still haven't heard from Cyclops, Kitty, or Wolverine. Storm and Colossus didn't return with some food and other travel size supplies. And why is Colossus in his metal form? They're supposed to be incognito. Did he I hope he wasn't walking around like that.
Like, and also, why would he turn into that when he gets here into the safe house? It's supposed to be a safe house.
Beast gets angry that Auroro forgot to buy some things that he needed to create an untraceable line to contact Shield and the ultimates, but Gene tells him to calm his furry ass down and take a break. And Storm snaps back that none of this would have happened if he didn't cause it all because Beast, yes, is directly responsible for the 800 people who died on the Brooklyn Bridge and anyone else who dies from the hands of Magneto. Ultimate Beast is the real reason that ultimatum happens and it was because he was horny. Beast walks away and disgruntledly informs the others that the away team is arriving back with the Blackbird and the cloaked aircraft lands inside the safe house and Gene realizes that Scott's mental presence isn't there. Wolverine apologizes.
This feels suspicious. and notes that he and Kitty got separated from Scott in the Savage Land after the cavern system they were in collapsed while Scott was still inside after they fought a massive supercomput and its army of zombies.
That part is true. So Kitty and Wolverine had to travel all the way around the island for 3 days just to get back to the X-Gen. And Peter turns to Kitty and quietly asks if Scott is really dead. And Kitty turns to him and for some reason they colored her hair blonde and quietly nods and says, "Yeah, he is." That night across the town at the Trickeellion, which really isn't that far all things considered. Captain America overlooks Wolverine's file. And this is also the first time in the uh Ultimate Universe that we learn that Wolverine's real name here is also James Howlet. Cap also recognizes him from some operations he went on with the Canadian special forces back in World War II. Tony cracks his joke that he must have some really good moisturizer to look as good as he does before his alcoholism gets the better of him and he begins to get up for a drink, asking everyone else what they want. Then in a flash, Quicksilver delivers everyone their requested drinks. Cap sits down with his Coca-Cola and Tony gets an update on his mutant location system that his company's working on in secret, which is like an update to the Cerebro system that they took from Xavier. And I think there's like some story where the Fantastic 4 get their hands on the Cerebro system and it causes a clash between the Fantastic 4 and the X-Men.
It is Cerebro but on a massive global scale using worldwide network of satellites and he notes that by the end of the month they will be able to trace every single person who is X factor positive. Cap notes that he hopes to have this solved before the end of the month and into the new year and then asks the twins if they have any suggestions regarding the brotherhood safe houseses. But Quicksilver tells him that all the ones that they knew about have been abandoned and destroyed. Thor then takes a moment to tell the two how admirable they are for taking accountability for their father and working with the Ultimates instead of siding with the Brotherhood. And Quicksilver notes that their father is a psychotic lunatic megalomaniac and it wasn't a difficult decision, especially now that they've gotten a taste of freedom away from him. Then the power goes out and the backup generators engage the emergency power supply. Cap orders everyone to ready themselves when the walls of the trickellion ache and wrench apart and the rattling sounds of gunfire ring through the halls as Magneto kills the soldiers with their own bullets and marches past them. Cap orders Thor to take up behind him along with Quicksilver and Wanda and that they need to ensure that Magneto stays away from Tony and the other civilians they have in the situation room. Then Magneto rips the doors apart and unleashes a torrent of torn metal against the ultimates as they all take cover. Cap launches his shield. Magneto returns it directly into him, slamming him into a wall. Thor launches Stormbreaker and Magneto manages to halt it just seconds away from his own head and then rockets it through the wall as he taunts the pathetic humans before him. Cap is held against the wall by his own shield and orders Wanda and Petra to act. But they stand silently as their father orders them to come and accept their punishment.
Do you know why I am so angry with you?
Because I sided with the X-Men. Because I stole your helmet in Washington.
Because I let your mind be taken over?
No.
I thought that actually showed some admirable ambition, pro. And for the first time in your life, you were showing some degree of strength.
But I was wrong.
I'm angry because you, son, took something great and you neutered it.
And your punishment, Wanda, is quite straightforward.
You get to watch.
The power returns and Magneto notes that all the information that Shield had on the Brotherhood and its members has been carefully deleted and totally wiped from all of their systems. But he notes that they will keep the trickelling around to use after the fall of man. Then he explodes out of the roof and flies away.
His magnetic influence disappears and Cap races to the hole as Tony reports that they got a message through to Xavier and that he wants to broker a deal to help. But Cap tells him that he couldn't care less. And at this point, Xavier is in this just as deep as Magneto. And the Ultimates are going to bring him down just as hard. A few days later, in a secret fake town dubbed Lincoln, President Bush meets with Nick Fury. And this place, it kind of reminds me of Pleasant Hill from later in the mainstream Marvel comics. Mainly because it's the facade of a small American town that's in reality totally controlled in every way possible by Shield. We learned from Fury that this place was founded as like a safe haven for every president in danger since John Wils Booth assassinated President Lincoln. And it has the most up-to-date security technology. I I I guess it's better for the president's morale to not be in a bunker somewhere and instead actually feel like he can like, you know, you walk around or something. Interesting idea. Fury guarantees the president's safety from Magneto and then notes that Shield was able to keep Magneto's attack on the triccillian under wraps. But the American public is getting antsy and paranoid and Fury tells him that the president shouldn't feel a twinge of sympathy for the low lives that are the X-Men. As he climbs into his car, he tells the president that he holds Xavier and the rest of his student ilk responsible for every person that is executed in Magneto's antihuman crusade.
Bush tells Fury that the X-Men saved his daughter and asks Fury to promise him that they bring Xavier in alive. Fury says that he can't keep that promise and he drives away. Later at the Trickelling, Captain Janet discovered that Banner turned into the Hulk and escaped during Magneto's attack and he ate six people before the knockout gas got him. Steve walks over to her and tells her that her DNA stuff doesn't matter to him or anyone else on the team. And Janet acts like she doesn't know what he's talking about. And then Steve leans in and whispers that he knows that she's a mutant. And that Fury also knows that she's a mutant ever since she joined SHIELD. But Cap assures her that this is a war on terror, not a war on mutants. Somewhere in America, Bobby Drake and his parents hide out and an old friend of his father's place because they are on the run following the crackdown by the government on the X-Men and the mutants. Also, remember earlier when I brought up how Bobby Drake's family tried to sue Charles Xavier? Uh, that was a thing that happened for a while. They worked with like some anti-mutant senator who wanted to take the school down and like pass laws to ban mutants even further than they already are. and he paid for Bobby's medical bills and all of that.
But when the time came, Bobby refused to sue. He refused to make any statements against Xavier. He flipped the switch and threw everything on his head on the head of the the senator and ruined his plans. So now that's all to say the family are even more broke than they would have been. Bobby's dad pleads with his son to let go of the idea of superheroics because their lives are totally ruined. And Bobby tells him that he talks about the X-Men like they're the brotherhood. And Bobby's dad notes that as far as he's concerned, the only difference between Magneto and Charles Xavier is about 300 lb of hair. That night at Pier 88, Gene learns from Charles that they're going to stop hunting the Brotherhood. Xavier continues that the most effective course that they can take now is compromising and speaking with them. Gene tells him that she doesn't really like this idea and would rather stick to the original plan, but Xavier asks if he's ever given her a reason to doubt his judgment. Then Wolverine walks up and tells him that he finished working on the car and he's about to head out for some supplies. And as he leaves, Charles brings up to Gene Wolverine's sudden opening of feelings after so much violence and betrayal. She notes that ever since the Phoenix happened, she's been getting flashes into Wolverine's mind. And Gene says that she knows it sounds crazy, but that's what happens. She also doesn't think that Scott's death was an accident. She thinks Wolverine let him die. The next day, Xavier and the X-Men meet with a mutant psychic associate of Magnetos at the Metropolitan Museum of Art. Magneto speaks through the mutant as Charles tells him that he's not his enemy, nor is he trying to trap his old friend. Xavier just wants to make a peace offering and then proposes a deal.
He will join. He and the X-Men will join forces with Magneto. once and for all and they'll be back together again like best friends if they move forward with the Brotherhood of Mutants crusade for mutant rights peacefully. Magneto asks Charles if he truly thinks that peace will get them anywhere. Magneto says he's surprised and that he'll need some time to think this over and Charles gives him 48 hours and Magneto tells him he'll be in touch.
And outside, Wolverine sits on his motorcycle and watches the two Brotherhood members leave and then drive away. And then he heads off after him.
And meanwhile, at his secret headquarters, Magneto speaks to Ununice about the proposal. He laughs off the idea and explains that it's obviously a trap, but he explains that this has been pretty helpful because it's told him that Charles is 10 steps behind him. And then he wonders when the Ultimates will be arriving at Charles's safe house. And several miles in the sky, Iron Man overlooks the lower east side, noting that the tip they got seems to be true.
And Christ, those clouds are moving quick. Fury runs the operation from the triccellion as ground troops move in.
Neural scramblers are activated with a 25-minute window and the Iron Man soarses down and performs a bombing run.
Captain America and the rest of the ultimates quickly move in. Across the city, Wolverine is assaulted by the sudden appearance of shield helicopters.
He heads into a car park up the floors until he rockets himself out and onto one of the choppers. Fury radios into Iron Man that they just lost contact with all four units deployed on Wolverine and orders Tony to divert his attention to that hairy freak.
Meanwhile, the X-Men work on escaping the burning ruin of their safe house.
Wasp and her team are subdued due to storm as she unleashes her powers on the Lower East Side. Then Thor arrives and slams his massive hammer through the roof of the safe house, collapsing it even further beneath her. In the sewers, Beast acrobatically escapes Hawkeyee's team, and Black Widow and her men wait at one of the culverts leading into the East River when a light shines towards him. She orders her squad to get ready for Beast and the Professor when one of them announces that something is moving at speeds 75 miles and picking up. Black Widow screams for everyone to hit the deck as the XJet rockets out and into the sky. Beast celebrates their escape and then Charles Xavier notices that Black Widow had latched on to the jet and planted small explosives. The plane explodes as Iron Man returns unable to locate Wolverine anywhere on any of his radars, something he's just able to do because of Weapon X. And he finds Beast and Charles ejecting with their parachutes. He soarses through the air, grabs their cables, and begins hauling them closer into the neural scramblers's area of effect when Wolverine leaps off of a nearby roof and slashes his claws through Iron Man's armor. Tony drops the X-Men on a roof as Wolverine tears into his suit and they plummet to the ground.
Nearby, Gene and Kitty have been cornered by two shield soldiers. Then, Wolverine crash lands into him and [ __ ] brutalizes the guys. He stands up and finds Captain America waiting for him. Cap asks Jim if he remembers their meetings, the 1942 air drops when they fought together in Africa in 44 and landed on Normandy in 45. And Wolverine asks who the hell Jim is. Cap gives him a rundown of a life Wolverine doesn't remember as they circle one another and shield troops surround them. Wolverine asks what the hell he's talking about and Cap reveals that it was just a distraction for tactical advantage and then opens fire on him along with the shield soldiers. Meanwhile, Colossus and Thor duke it out when Hawkeye launches a miniature localized nuke arrow. Surely that can't be safe. Elsewhere, a team find their way to Xavier and Beast's location, and Fury orders them to drop them both and secure Xavier. Then, Iceman arrives and freezes the entire Lower East Side in a deluge of ice and frost. Bobby calls out for the professor and because his ice traction ruined Shield's neural scramblers, Xavier and Gene can once again use their telepathy.
The X-Men then all look around in shock as Xavier reveals that he has paralyzed every non-mutant mind within a 10b block radius, keeping them in perfect stasis.
But he tells the kids that they have to move quickly and demands that they leave him behind and ensure their own safety.
However, the Wasp is still up and active, and Fury gives her Xavier's location. A few minutes later, she flies in, zaps Xavier with her electrical wasp stings, and makes him fall unconscious.
Cap then radios in to Fury that they somehow lost 8 minutes of time, and all the X-Men are gone. And that night at the Triccellian, Cap and Fury discuss Tony's condition. Steve noting that he's perfectly happy with the cute nurses giving him all that attention. Then Fury notes that with Xavier in their custody, it's only a matter of time before his little cult comes crashing down and that in a couple weeks time, every one of them will be locked away in Camp X Factor down in Cuba. But unbeknownst to Fury, Magneto has had his brotherhood interfere with the Triccalonian systems and he's currently speaking to Xavier in his cell. Magneto informs Charles that he has a final offer to give him. He'll remove Charles psychic blocks. Then he'll tear this place apart and they can leave to fight for mutants like they once did. But Xavier tells him he's not interested. Magneto ponders how fractured his team must be right now, huddled together with no leader, hunted by humanity, and questions how long it'll take before they come looking for a new leader. And just before he leaves, Magneto tells Xavier that a new era is beginning. Not just for mutants, but for the X-Men, and Xavier will play no part in it. Released in 2002, written by Mark Miller with art by Ben Lie, David Finch, and Adam Cubert. This is Ultimate X-Men: Return of the King. The book begins eight years in the past, which according to the chronology would be about 1995.
Eric Lyncher and Charles Xavier meet at Xavier's home in Scotland, and Charles is in the midst of both divorcing and leaving his wife Moira and their son, David. I'm sure nothing bad will ever come from this. 7 years ago in San Antonio, a 16-year-old mutant named Ricky Gibson is brought down by the banks of a lake by a lynch party. And as the leader puts a shotgun barrel to Ricky's head and pulls the trigger, nothing happens and Magneto makes his presence known. Charles then makes the men all remember how much they love their families and how little time they spend together and sends them off on their way. The two then save Ricky as he breaks down about his issues. He explodes. Why is that such a common mutant trait? It's just exploding.
Anyway, he can't control it, but they both promise that he will learn. Six years ago, the men purchase a large mansion in San Francisco to act as a refuge for mutant runaways. Eric also keeps his kids there. Four years ago, Magneto meets with Ricky Gibson once again, now going by the name of Detonator, at the top of the Citadel in the Savage Land. And by this time, Magneto has started to become uh his usual self. You know, this is like posthuman mutant supremacist kind of Magneto that he normally is. And he's also begun radicalizing all of the inhabitants that live in the Savage Land, especially during Xavier's absence. And he's becoming progressively more paranoid about Charles. And only months later, in 1999, Professor Charles Xavier escapes the Citadel along with his camp of followers into the jungle, and he's paralyzed. Magneto takes over the Savage Land, officially declaring the ruling party the Brotherhood of Mutants. Xavier and his followers nearly escape and he's taken to a hospital in New York. And three weeks later, Detonator is sent on a mission to detonate at the Pentagon.
And in the present of 2003, Magneto leads the Brotherhood through the Arctic Circle. Meanwhile, Mastermind and Multiple Man are sent to the Louv and make people see all kinds of weird insects and swarms or whatever as a distraction as the multiple men work on stealing priceless artifacts and artworks. They then load them into a shuttle outside and they prepare to head off. And there's this interesting moment where Multiple Man asks Mastermind if he can make this mutant chick that he's hooking up with look like either Scarlet Witch or Gwennneth Paltro. And Mastermind says he's unsure due to the ethical implications of this. Mastermind being the same character that Jeff Loe would later write as preparing to rape Valkyrie as he like kept her in a in a comaike state in Ultimates 3. At the White House, which is still under construction and renovations following Magneto's attack earlier in the year, Fury demonstrates the new Sentinel agents to Dick Cheney. Fury notes that the specialized rifles are made out of a nonconductive polymer. So, if Magneto does show up, it shouldn't be an issue.
The Dixster asks if Fury truly believes it's safe to bring Bush back to the White House, and Fury assures him that the building will be a veritable fortress by the time he's done with it.
At the Citadel over the Arctic Circle, Forge continues to create an amplifier for Magneto's abilities. And then we get a follow-up to that mastermind moment because Saber-Tooth and some Brotherhood member are walking around and Saber-Tooth asks if the guy thinks that the chick that uh multiple men is hooking up with looks like Gwennneth Paltro.
So I guess Mastermind came around to it. And that also means that the way he acts in Ultimates 3 isn't very out of character.
So I think we all owe Jeff Loe an apology. Pyro, I don't [ __ ] know. The juryy's still out on him. A few days later, a massive bombing takes place in downtown Chicago. The Brotherhood members who pulled it off speed away only to run into Colossus and Storm causes a massive rainstorm to extinguish the fires as Colossus apprehends the bombers. And he hopes that this is the first step towards regaining the public's trust for the X-Men. Cut to Stamford, Connecticut. The X-Men hideout in an inhabited home with Gene using her telepathy to hide them and their actions from this family. Kitty Pride's not a fan. She thinks it's creepy, which yeah, it is, but also the fact that the family's getting up the stuff. The wife is cheating on her husband. The husband, when he's home alone, masturbates continuously, uh, they both are very anti-mutant. Anyway, Gene cries a little bit and apologizes because ever since all that Phoenix stuff, she hasn't been able to set her mind right. And eventually she asks Kitty what exactly happened at the Savage Land and if Wolverine let Cyclops die. Cut to Camp X Factor in Guantanamo Bay. Fury meets Xavier in his cell guarded heavily by Sentinel troops. He asks Charles to have a frank conversation with him about the Magneto situation. Specifically, the whole Xavier completely lies to the government and Nick Fury and Shield about killing Magneto and then hid him among a civilian population after rewriting his mind because he's an old friend of his and now he's come back and it's bit them all in the ass. Really, none of this would ever happen if Charles had just killed Magneto.
Ultimatum never would have occurred. So really, Professor X is mainly to blame.
And then of course, Beast. Xavier argues that he worked to rehabilitate Eric because handing him over to Shield would have been a death sentence. Fury tells him, "Yes, that is correct." And then asks if he means like the one Magneto has issued to all of these civilians that keep dying in his attacks. Roughly 3,000 people have died so far from Brotherhood assaults around the world.
Fury then demands to know the locations of both Magneto and the X-Men. Xavier assures him that he doesn't know. Fury doesn't believe him, but there's no way his shield psychics can prove it. Then they bring in Nightcrawler, who they've captured. Kurt assures the professor that he's been treated well enough, but he cannot keep their telepaths at bay much longer. Fury explains that if Xavier tells them where their safe houses are right now, he has Fury's word that he'll do everything he can to protect the students. Nick's number one priority is not a bunch of kid like young people who want to do good. It's to find the terrorist. But Xavier refuses and tells Nick they're the only hope either of their species has. Fury sigh and leaves. In a new home, Wolverine recounts that he killed or severely wounded about 60 SHIELD agents when they found him not long ago, and Beast is very upset at their efforts to turn the public perception around, only for Wolverine to go do this. Then a bright light flashes, and Magneto appears. Iceman goes for the attack and it goes right through him and Magneto demonstrates his hologram and Colossus demands to know how he's found them.
Magneto tells him that Forge made up a little machine that could contact them specifically no matter where they're at in the world. Magneto then goes on to explain that he's not there to threaten them. He just wants to extend a courtesy that he did for his children and bring them back as well to put aside all of their disagreements to help the X-Men because the world isn't interested in their teachings or their efforts or their attempts to help. And they will never see mutants as anything other than a threat. And he invites them to his citadel. He asks that they at least consider it and that they have seven days. Then his hologram disappears.
Flashback time. About a month ago, when Cyclops, Wolverine, and Kitty Pride were in the Savage Land fighting zombies controlled by a giant computer, the ground breaks beneath Scott's feet.
Wolverine tasks Kitty with finding them a way out. As he works to reach out for Scott, Scott says the professor was right to put them together on this mission after all, because they really are working together. Wolverine grabs hold of him and tells him to guess again, and then let's go. And the next day, Scott lies absolutely [ __ ] brutalized at a chasm. He lies there listening to the ticking of his father's old army watch and deduces he has broken eight bones, lost three teeth, his lung is collapsed, and he has at least 14 cuts of various dimensions. He listens to the artificial dinosaurs above and wonders why Wolverine did this, and then quickly realizes why Wolverine would do this.
12 days later, he's fed himself on whatever he can really catch, and he's also chewing on his leather gloves, eating grubs, and sucking on rocks to get the moisture.
Day 26, however, gets a bit more interesting cuz apparently Scooby-Doo appears in the hole next to him. He's also seemingly broken all of his bones in his body because Scott says that Scooby is also fighting for his life. A bundle of rocks also sprout legs and start dancing upon him. And he tries repeating his times tables, saying the alphabet backwards, listing the presidents, but he quickly realizes he's losing his mind and wonders why no one has come looking for him. But then one night, he hears many footsteps moving around up top and then a light shines down upon him and a group finds him and takes him to Magneto's Citadel at Camp X Factor in Guantanamo Bay. Nightcrawler speaks to Xavier regarding the shield psychics that broke his mental blocks.
Xavier asks that he look at the positive of their incarceration because while he might not have his abilities, he does have a captive audience of 43 mutants who've never known him before and people who have to listen to his philosophies 24 hours a day. Kurt asks if he thinks that the team will find Magneto and Xavier assures him they will and says that everything happens for a reason and Kurt needs to just relax and conserve himself. Sometime within the week, Forge completes his work and Magneto announces to the Savagel Land Mutants that the time has come and then he enacts his Ark project because don't forget Ultimate Magneto is really Christian for some inexplicable reason. He is just very religious. I think if I remember correctly, Ultimate Magneto has the Ten Commandments tattooed on his back.
Anyway, the mutants have gathered two of every animal, including two humans.
Downstairs in the Citadel's infirmary, two of Magneto's followers head into the room where Cyclops has been recuperating. One of them calls Scott a traitor, and Scott eyebeams the hell out of him and tells him that his name's Cyclops. Baby, don't wear it out. The nurse goes for him, and he blasts her into a wall, too. Then he picks up the head doctor and demands that he take him to Magneto. And simultaneously, as Magneto begins his amplifier to destroy the human world, the Brotherhood assaults XFactor and frees the prisoners, Magneto reaches his forces and powers around the Earth itself. And then he's blasted in the back by Cyclops. Magneto groans and bleeds from his mouth and orders Saber-Tooth to stand down. Cyclops is powerless without his sight, and Magneto calls him a pathetic, lonely traitor who's been brainwashed to betray his own people.
Cyclops smiles and reveals his X-Men tracking disc, and the Blackbird crashes into the Citadel, and the X-Men race into action against the Brotherhood forces. Storm takes down Magneto, and Gene runs to Cyclops. Wolverine beheads Saber-Tooth as Magneto enacts a force field around himself and unleashes his powers and works his way back to his machine, unaware that Kitty's [ __ ] it up. It's what she do when you're messing with the MWA crew cuz she's born and raised. Yes, she's born and raised in Queens. But Magneto is still able to use just enough of the power to reach out to a nuclear reactor north of Miami. And Rainbow Falls generating plant explodes.
Magneto hoists Wolverine as he holds the others to the ground and prepares to start torturing the X-Men. Magneto focuses on Wolverine specifically. I wonder why. tormenting his ultimate betrayer outside of Xavier, of course.
Not noticing Colossus crawling across the floor, he forces himself to his feet and drives a massive metal fist into Magneto's chest. The X-Men are all freed as Colossus unleashes his rage upon Magneto, and he destroys his helmet and sends him away. And meanwhile, outside of the blast zone, Professor X and his associates that he has brainwashed work to save the people of northern Miami, the X-Men all unleash their anger upon Magneto in his citadel until he's laid in ruin. Cyclops tells him that this is all over, and Magneto uses his power to erupt the Citadel, but they're all caught in psychic shields. Then, Professor X's floating head appears, and he announces that he's commandeered the minds of XFactor and used them to help those in Florida after the reactor catastrophe. Even Rogue is there. Not long after, the X-Men leave the Citadel with Magneto apprehended. Then, Gene is overcome by the Phoenix, and she rockets away in a fiery blaze. It crashes into a nearby area and Charles witnesses Gan Gray, the Phoenix, lifting the entire nuclear plant from the very Earth it's built upon. And she reveals to Charles that she's in full control as she hoists it into the stratosphere and detonates it into tiny pieces. Meanwhile, back in the North Pole, Wolverine tells Cyclops he owes him an apology, but that probably won't cut it. Cyclops says that he's right, and the two circle each other as the others watch on. Wolverine reveals that yes, he did try to kill Scott. And then he charges, but he's done away with by a sheer blast from Cyclops's eyes. Then Cyclops walks to the Blackbird and announces that Wolverine is no longer on the team. Over the next couple weeks, all the news stories are running regarding the X-Men, how they defeated Magneto and saved Florida, how Magneto was handed over to the Ultimates, and that he will now be contained deep within the trickealion.
And then the X-Men turn themselves in.
Pro- Xavier and X-Men protests erupt against the president's war on mutants.
Xavier conducts interviews. Wolverine is no longer part of the team and President Bush meets with his adviserss Tony Stark and Nick Fury regarding the situation.
Tony and Fury argue for the X-Men and they provide a detailed 200page document about Tony's solution that might get them out of this genetic war. Cheney is angry that it calls for a public distinction between the X-Men and the Brotherhood and complete exoneration of the X-Men and Xavier. And real life Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld also argues against the idea. Fury notes it's a compromise for both sides. They are proposing an incorporation of the Xavier school and the X-Men themselves into the federal budget which would technically bring the X-Men under SHIELD's jurisdiction. Theory also notes that he doesn't like compromise any more than any of the other guys in the room.
He has a big dick that he likes to swing around to. He gets it. But if Tony Stark's predictions about mutant birth rates continues growing exponentially like he expects them to, then this is the likely solution that they should take because it's not smart to alienate these children like they have been doing, especially when they might be the only thing keeping them and the world alive. Three months later, the Xavier Institute for Gifted Children is rebuilt and reopened. A grand gala is held for the incoming students and their parents.
And uh this is also where it's revealed that Professor Bradock's daughter, Betsy Bradock, who's previously been dead, is now possessing the body of a dead Japanese girl named Kuan. She also has golden eyes. The realw Quanin died at the same time that Betsy did and Betsy just like her mind took over her body or something. I don't get it. It's odd.
It's just as weird as the normal version, I guess. Beast asks Colossus where Scott is and Peter reveals that he left town. And later around sunset, a shield shopper arrives with Peter's family. Gene notes how nice it is that they're spending money on something helpful. and Thor chuckles heartily about the military-industrial complex that is boring its way into humanity.
Very late into the night, after the parents have left and the students retire, Fury and Charles hang out in the ballroom. McFury brushes Beast's fur off of his nice suit, but notes that Mr. McCoyy's brain and abilities do have his interest, and he would like to bring him on into SHIELD sometime in the future.
Fury then tells Xavier that he respects what's being taught to the students and Xavier laughs that he never expected the US government to invite him into the heart of the machine itself. And Fury tells him that they live in very paranoid times. Charles agrees and thanks Fury for pretty much everything.
You know, getting everybody back on their feet, I guess, even though he did imprison him for a bit. And they call it a night and say their goodbyes. And then Xavier hauls ass down the hall. Look at him go. Sometime later, in the far north of Canada, a bear charges. Wolverine snicks his claws and he takes it down before it can strike him. And then Cyclops emerges and asks if Logan realizes that there's a perfectly good restaurant less than 15 miles down the road. Wolverine asks why the hell he's here and if it's for some kind of rematch as he digs into some raw bear meat. Cyclops says that what they did it in the North Pole. Cyclops says what they did in the North Pole wasn't really a fight, but nothing that Logan didn't deserve. And Logan tears into some more bear meat and agrees. He did deserve it.
Cyclops reveals that he actually came here to apologize. Wolverine is very confused and Cyclops explains that he went against everything that the professor has ever taught him. Every time someone has ever crossed him, he's had this stupid alpha male reaction. But what did he ever actually accomplish from doing that? He drove the world's most dangerous mutant into isolation to be completely left alone with his thoughts, which is, you know, the exact situation that Wolverine was in before he joined the Brotherhood of Mutants.
And Cyclops asks that Logan return with him to Westchester and finish his rehabilitation. Wolverine storms off and asks about the others. Cyclops reveals that the rest of the team agree. They want him back, but Logan still refuses.
Logan glares at him and Cyclops goes into his pocket. He reveals that Xavier made contact with Shield and confirmed that Weapon X have long since destroyed all incriminating files related to Logan's experimentation. But there was one piece of evidence that they were able to find a small golden ring with an engraving that reads to James with all my love. Logan asks where the hell he got a wedding ring from, and Scott tells him it's his wedding ring from back in a time when he was Lucky Jim. But Wolverine has no memory of the ring or who it possibly could have been from or for. Then the Blackbird signals down its tractor beam and the two head into it. V
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