The video effectively exposes the "tough guy" persona as a fragile survival mechanism that isolates men rather than protecting them. It offers a much-needed shift from performative aggression to the actual strength found in emotional intelligence and community trust.
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Black Men are Tired of the "TOUGH GUY" Act... This Destroyed the Brotherhood!Added:
This video is a letter to all my brothers out there. The brothers that share the same skin complexion as me.
All right? This video is to y'all cuz I think the majority of us, we all have the same sentiment, but nobody's really talking about this one out loud. Nobody talks about how we are tired of the mugs. We are tired of mugging. We are tired of the looking tough. We are tired of the playing tough. We're tired of the gotta be with the shits all the time type of, you know, rhetoric that's surrounded around us. It's like the unspoken thing. When it got past us at a young age, you know what I mean? Got past us that this is this is where we fall in the in the social groups in school. We fall in these groups. And this group operates like this kind of like kind of like gangs in prison. like, "All right, if you gonna be a part of this gang, you know what I mean? This is how they operate." And you know, from a young age, you're gonna kind of uh uh you're gonna be attached to or be attracted to the group that looks like you, of course.
And in that group came with certain things. Yeah. I mean, that we never let go. So, we're going to get into some of that, but as you can see from this video right here, black men are tired of acting tough for no reason. All right?
So, go ahead and hit that like button, subscribe button, turn on my post notifications, and all that good stuff, man. Um, I'll catch y'all up on my life at the end of the video. So, you want to know about that, you know, you can stay tuned at till the end of the video, but we'll we'll do that at the end. Um, but go ahead, hit that like button, subscribe, turn on my post notifications, and all that good stuff.
To all my new viewers, I post every single day except for Saturday. Sundays, we do a scripture read. Without further ado, man, let's get into it.
>> Bro, us black men, bro, we gota We got to get it together. LIKE, WHY Y'ALL ALWAYS WANT TO BE ACTING so hard and so tough and like damn, bro? Like, can't even walk into the in in the store and say, "What's going on, brother? You all right?" without half you [ __ ] trying to grim and mean mug because you don't know a [ __ ] Like, all that tough [ __ ] That [ __ ] so weak and lame, bro. And it only I only see this [ __ ] with our race for real. For real. I don't white people they speak amongst each other all the time. Chinese people they ching chong all the time.
Arabs they habibi all the time. And when it come to us brothers, you know what I'm saying? See another brother in public and stuff and just be like what up though? On some respect type stuff.
Y'all want to look all hard and like WHO PISSED YOU OFF? I ain't do it, bro.
CHILL OUT. RELAX. YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING? STEP OUTSIDE SAG. GO GET SOME FRESH AIR. Wake up. Try it again.
Because ain't nothing in life that bad to where you got to be this whole tough ass mean [ __ ] all the time. Bro, we got to do better, man. We got to do better. When I say they did a number on us, they did a number on us. How are we ever going to come together when we first we assume that we are each other's enemies?
I'm walking outside and everybody's, "Hey, how you doing? Hey, how you doing?" Then the one time I come across somebody that looks like me. It's like the energy shifts. It's like a a unspoken like, "Yeah, chin up." Like, you mean? And me, I killed that. I killed that years ago. I don't care if you look like whatever type of image they try to pick uh um pitch to us to watch out for, right? Yo, how you doing, bro? You good? I remember one time somebody straight up told me like, "Yo, bro, you got like a real" and I mean, you know, dudes is always, you know, shelled up first, you know, and I'm I'mma approach people with a joke. You know what I mean? Either a joke or just a light-hearted, you know, interaction.
And dude, like, yo, bro, like, you really got a a a light about yourself, bro. Never lose that. I just looked at him. I said, bro, like, what what what am I walking around mad for? You know what I mean? Like what am I walking around angry for? So I really want to know am I the only one that is tired is tired of walking around seeing a brother that look just like me and I and I I can't first get the hey how you doing bro? Hey have a good one. When are we going to mature into that? And now let me just say this.
I'm speaking on this. This is not all black men. You know what I mean? Because yes, there are black men that I see and I'm yo what's good bro? How you doing?
Like you I mean there's some places black people are the only people that talk to me. You know what I mean? Um you know head nodding and stuff like that and that's cool. But to my brothers that's still stuck in this mindset of looking tough. This video is more so for y'all.
Let me be the first one to say this. The dude that looks the toughest is usually the most scared. Why are you trying to look tough? be tough when it's time to be tough, but instead you're trying to be a um you're trying to scare every you're trying to be a scarecrow. You're trying to scare people away before could even pop off cuz you're actually scared.
The the the the man that could fight the best, shoot the best in the room is the person in the room you would least expected cuz he's not trying to fight. He not trying to get into no altercation. He don't care for none of that. He he just he respects fighting and he respects gunplay. So he just wants to go home. But he's probably the best one at both in the room.
So looking tough gets you nowhere. You know what I mean?
If you feel like you're in a place where well if I don't look like this then you shouldn't be over there, bro. You just shouldn't be over there.
But we in Publix. How you doing, brother? All right. Now keep it pushing.
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>> That's it. the bat, especially when you deal with I feel like it's the most effective using fiery language. That's the only way people know you serious off the bat.
Especially when you deal with an avatar like this. When you melanated, they don't want to take you serious.
You know what I'm saying? It's like you got to, you know what I'm saying? Man, you got to put extra emphasis on [ __ ] because they want to devalue you. They want to gaslight you, you know, put you in a predicament where you looking crazy.
So, you either going to get gas lit and not f to get heard or you going to fit into the box that they made for you, not give a [ __ ] and be heard. But maybe it's another answer.
But them the answers I'm coming up with.
Now, he's getting deep into where this comes from, and I appreciate this. I really like this conversation right here. Um, I started a little bit of it, but you know, the group conversations kind of always set it off. So, let's hear what these brothers got to say. On the screen, it says, "I see a lot of black men who are angry. They don't know the reason why they are angry."
>> I see a lot of black men who are angry for they don't even know what reason why they angry sometimes. I went to uh >> bridal shower >> and dude was acting tough for no [ __ ] reason.
>> Like bro, we had a bridal shower, bro.
>> It was a g it was a gay dinner, not a br. Why are you acting so tough? Like like you tell me there's no part in your body or your your spirit that can be happy for a moment. Using used to have each other used to >> shackle each other because we were afraid to to be certain ways.
>> Yeah.
>> Yes, [ __ ] I watch STEP BY STEP. WHO DIDN'T? BOY, you nice.
>> I watched it all.
>> Kelly Kapowski. Yeah.
>> Tanga.
>> Tanga. Where you at?
>> I ain't watch that [ __ ] No. No. No.
>> Stop. I see a lot of black men who are angry. The fact of the matter is everybody didn't come from this traumatized background, street life background. Everybody's not from the hood. You know what I mean? We are allowed to be into other things other than basketball, football, fighting, and girls. You know what I mean? Like, and again, some people may already know this, but I just want to reiterate to that young boy that's confused. He knows he likes to do things that his friends may be not into, but he's scared to bring it to the forefront because maybe his friends won't accept him anymore. So, he falls in the same box, that crab in the bucket mentality. You know what I mean? Ah, bro, you being lame. Oh, you you in the you in the anime. I mean, granted, anime is not my thing, but um there's actually a show on Amazon Prime that I've been watching. I don't know if it's it's I think it's called Invincible. I ain't going to hold you. I watched like three episodes. I ain't watch cartoon in years. But that joint like the the story line was kind of dope. Like I'm on Google like, "Yo, is this anime? Did I just fall in love with anime?" It said no. But it is what it is. But anyways, back to it.
We are allowed to like other things, too. And we need to stop calling liking other things trying to act white. Now, I mean, trying you you uh you you trying to be like them. Like, no, bro. I'm trying to experience life, you know? We got to get out of this mentality of just our city. I'm trying to see the world, you know? But it's something about being especially from an inner city, you know. I mean, you have that group of friends with that that group thinking and nobody thinks anybody could venture out.
Instead, we have to walk around here just looking angry, just waiting for something to pop off and then and then be a crash out.
When you have emotional regulation, you realize, bro, all that [ __ ] is pointless. Like, why am I walking around here looking angry? Like, that's not a way. That's that's not that's not something I want to carry all day. The angry face is a heavy a heavy weight.
You know what I mean? It is a heavy weight to carry. It actually the emotions that you allow your body to go through or you you kind of put into your mind I should say these things also affect your health.
Did you know that your brain So while you out here playing tough watch this your brain doesn't know the difference between reality and the things that you are thinking. So if you are thinking fight or flight all the time, always being on guard, you know what I mean? Like mugging everybody as if there is a problem. Your body is is your body is experiencing reality as if there's a problem going on and there's nothing going on.
You're actually affecting your health by walking around look mean, mugging, and angry. Smiling is good for your health.
Hugs are good for your health.
A handshake and a dapp and a bring it in is good for your health. You don't believe me? I was one of those people that used to be like, "Man, my emotions don't affect my health." Have you ever experienced the feeling of stage fright that that flush that goes through your body, that was your emotions affecting your body, you know what I mean? That's the easiest way. Have you ever been getting ready to do something and your heart starts to race. That is your emotions affecting your body.
So when you choose to have negative emotions, what do you think you are putting onto your body?
Not good inputs, I tell you that.
So to walk around with the angry face is not even healthy for us.
That's on everything. That's on neighborhood too, [ __ ] The [ __ ] get >> That's on everything.
>> Whole time. I grew up in a goated suburban community. And and this is this is something that I really want our community to shake. Know what I mean? I really want us to shake the having to be a crash out because we're black. We do not have to be the crash outs. We can be the people that be like, "Yo, bro, this [ __ ] not even worth it." It's so crazy.
And I'm going to share this with y'all.
I was um out of town this past weekend with my family. Um I took him to a a water park or whatever and I was it was a country town that I was in and because I consumed so much content and I was thinking about the whole Chud the Builder thing and I was using the bathroom and you know it was a couple of white gentlemen in in the bathroom and I was just like a random thought just crossed my mind like yo what if they just said something crazy to me. You know what I mean? like they just called me something just just randomly, you know, this thought just popped up in my head and I was like, damn. Like, what what would I do? And the only thing that popped up in my brain was you should laugh and leave.
You should laugh and leave. And then I started to play out the scenario of them repeating what happened to somebody else, right? like, man, but they're going to say that I laughed and and let them say that and leave. But then the other side of me was like, why do why do I have to be ignorant when others are being ignorant to me? Why can't I be the one to just make it out out safely? Because I have a family that's waiting for me at a table right now. Why would I want to come out either bleeding or busted knuckles? because somebody else was feeling stupid.
Why do I feel like I have to do that?
I don't have to do that. I can actually choose the high road. I'm not going to take no no disrespect as far as you putting hands on me or anything like that or, you know, and I don't fully know how I'd handle that moment, but I'm having this moment with myself.
I don't have to fit a stigma because that's what's expected out of me.
I can actually make the right decision because what really matters to me is not the words that this that comes out of this brother's mouth is me getting my family home safely.
Because if I care too much about his words, who am I going to trust to take care of them? Cuz that's really what matters to me.
It doesn't pay me to be angry.
It pays me to be emotionally aware.
It pays me to keep my head on a swivel with a smile on my face.
But it don't pay me to just be angry, black man. It don't pay us to be angry, especially to each other.
I'm not your enemy. I am not. You talk to me, bro, I'm going to sit here and talk your ear off gem for gem for gem.
You ask me questions. Promise you. I don't care what my hair look like. I don't care about my tattoos. I mean, I don't care how tall I am, my build, whatever. My my I'm not your enemy, bro.
You know what I mean? I don't care about the chains. What? I'm not your enemy.
You know what I mean? Probably one of the coolest brothers you can have around you. You know what I mean? Cuz we going to shoot the breeze. We going to just chill. And the fact of the matter is, I find out that a lot of us are like that.
Once we actually talk, it's like, nah, bro. It's a vibe.
Let's lead with a handshake, bro. We ain't got to keep leading with the mugs, boys. Don't cry. Don't be a punk.
>> Okay, he's going to go a little bit deeper to this.
>> Show no fear. Don't act like a [ __ ] Be a man. Man up. Boys don't cry. These are all sentiments that's weaponized against black boys when we are trying to express ourselves. You keep on crying, I'm going give you something to cry for. By the time many black boys reach the age of nine or 10, you understand that the only emotion that you allowed to show is anger. Your feelings got hurt, anger.
Somebody made you feel insecure, anger.
Somebody disrespected you, anger. So the way that we deal with this conflict becomes fighting and violence. The indoctrination of black masculinity leaves a void in wholeness. It literally takes away from how you're able to show up as your full authentic self because there are certain emotions and feelings that you are not allowed access to, especially when it comes to expressing them. So, you just hold them in. You suppress them. And then you have grown men that try to have meaningful relationships. And we don't have a good good good experience in being able to express emotions outside of anger and aggression. That man is emotionally unavailable because he's mastered it as a survival skill. When we correlate expression emotions to acting like a [ __ ] you see the issue and why a lot of men be like, "I ain't got time.
What's up? Let's fight about it."
Emotional intelligence is a big part of conflict management skills. And it's the reason why a lot of us just rather throw them things because the emotional intelligence part, it take a bunch of investment. It take a little vulnerability, a few things we was calling weakness and that we told not to show. That's what emotional intelligence requires. And a lot of us are defined or positioned in dialectical opposition to being emotionally intelligent. Education is elevation. Don't >> That boy was preaching his I actually want to put his in um his Tik Tok on the screen cuz look like he has a lot of good videos. Um here's his Tik Tok right here. That wants to Damn, that boy up there. He going crazy.
Um, you know what's so crazy about that?
That emotional intelligence conversation?
It sounds it it's such a a a catchy thing now. You know, people say emotional intelligence. Emotional intelligence. But it goes so deep. Do you know how many people are sitting in prison because they don't have that little catchphrase right there?
Emotional intelligence.
a 5second I couldn't handle my emotions ruined their whole entire life.
I didn't understand how I was feeling through their whole entire life just just because of that. I couldn't regulate my emotions in the moment. So I just reacted.
Let me give you another one. as a father. I was laughing with my bro yesterday cuz he's also um you know he he has he's a father and and um you know the man at his house whatever him his lady and all that and you know we was just confiding to each other just talking about our experiences cuz we have similar experiences and one of the things that we brought up is that you are constantly dealing with emotions. I'm not talking about my emotions. I'm talking about the emotions of my family.
Like everybody wants to talk about being Billy badass and you know if somebody run up in the house then you gonna do this and paying the bills and you know uh uh carrying all the groceries or whatever you know cuz you the macho man.
But nobody talks about or not enough people talk about how much emotions you have to deal with being the man of the house. Cuz yes I am the iron. I am the anchor you mean of my my household. You know what I mean?
But part of that, and this, and I talked about this in a video before, is I have to deal with emotions for my wife. I have to deal with the emotions of my daughter. I have to deal with emotions from my son cuz he's always crying. I got to deal with my deal with the emotions from my infant uh uh daughter.
You know what I mean? I'm constantly dealing with emotions. Good emotions.
Confusing emotions. Emotions.
How can I deal with something I don't understand?
Where are you going with that, Boogie?
We equipped ourselves with so many physical things as men.
That's our preparation to be strong men for a family.
But not enough men are equipping equipping theirel with the emotional intelligence to handle the other side. The things you can't see when it comes to leading a family.
You can't lead a pack cuz that is exactly what this is. Think about the tribe days. This is exactly what this is. You can't lead a pack if you don't understand the emotions and the morale of your your group.
That's like a big word in the military.
We used to use morale. Morale. Morale.
And that's just another way of saying just keeping the emotions in the right place. Keeping everybody in um good spirits basically like oh we're going to do this for morale builder. Keep everybody you know feeling good. So everybody don't fall into a depression.
That's that's being aware of emotions.
Cuz if you're not aware of the emotions, the people fall off.
Which again why emotional intelligence is so important.
There are things you're not going to understand fully because you're not experiencing it. But part of emotional intelligence is is understanding that not all emotional emotional um um stages are attached to logic and that's okay.
There's a way to deal with that, too.
But where do I get at all with all of this? We started this video talking about mugging, mugging each other, playing the angry game. The wise, why do we have to continuously play angry? Is it because we're not really emotionally aware of how we are actually feeling?
You know what I mean? So this is the only thing that that we deem as okay because as a little boy we was told, "Yo, stop stop crying."
Then we get to school. Yo, bro, you with us.
Why is everybody crashing out? Okay, so this is the normal. This we crash outs.
Okay, so now we in the real world, bro.
This is who you watch out for. Now you listen to the music. I'm looking for a [ __ ] I'mma do a [ __ ] bad. Can't wait to see a [ __ ] Watch when I see that [ __ ] I'm pulling up around the corner.
Only thing I see is that [ __ ] Pull out my two two and now I'm running that [ __ ] down.
It's all of this me against my folks.
Like if we was a tribe, if if if the black American people were a tribe, we are making music about getting the people that's in the tribe instead of protecting the tribe.
Now again, we can go into the history of how yeah, this stuff has been pushed on us. We know that. I make my videos for awareness.
What do you do once you know?
Do you just repeat it or do you act against it? That's where we have our power.
I'm not your enemy, black man.
And most likely you're not my enemy. So we don't have to act like it. When I see you, I want to wave. I want to head nod.
Want to shake your hand. You know what I mean? I want to laugh. I know we got similar jokes.
And believe it or not, when you actually when you're that person with that energy, with that light, it brightens the light over there. Even though you may have thought like it wasn't a light over there. No, there's a light over there. It's just he's scared to turn it on. He don't know if he's if he's allowed to turn his light on over here because that's that's seen as weakness. But what did I say earlier in the video? The man that's the toughest that actually knows how to fight, that done train for fighting, the man that actually knows how to shoot a gun, doesn't want to do either. But they can if they have to. So you don't have nothing to prove sitting there playing tough. Be tough when it's time to be tough.
But I am tired of playing tough when all I want to do is have a good time. Again, hit that like button, subscribe button, turn on my post notifications and all that good stuff, man. Um, if you resonate with this video, come back, watch more. Watch this video if it popped up already. Probably ain't po up yet. I'm I'm, you know, my time is a little messed up, but watch the next video. All right. Whatever videos popped up on the side of the screen or underneath this video now. I mean, um, and if you want to make some extra money just playing games on your phone, all you got to do is click the link in the description below, the link in the comment section. and these apps literally paying people just to play games on your phone. So try it out. See if it's for you. If it's for you, it's for you. If it's not for you, it's not for you. But if you catch yourself making money, make money. Until next time, y'all. I got to give y'all an update. You know what I mean? So yeah, like I said, this for, you know, the family, my my my folks now, right? Not just the new viewers. New viewers, you family, too, if you want to be, you know. But the video is over now. I'm catching up with my people. Um, man, this past week, this past weekend, me and my family, um, we went to P, was that Pennsylvania? Never mind. We went to Tennessee. I mean, they have like a water park out there. It was mad nice.
Really spurred a moment. I was like, man, me and my wife, you know, we getting ready to do our thing for my birthday or whatever, you know, but I really, like going into my 30s, I have to do something as a family, you know what I mean? Like because this is a huge accomplishment to my entering my 30s like them, you know what I mean? Like my my my daughters, my my my son, my wife, like this is like them together now. I mean, we packed up the Cyber Truck or whatever. I clicked that self drive and it took us all the way to Tennessee.
Probably made one stop for a char a charge, quick charge or whatever. I ain't I ain't touched the wheel.
probably I probably touch the wheel twice the whole ride. I ain't going to lie. Everything fit in the truck. It was real nice. It was a real smooth ride.
Even my wife said it was like that was really smooth. Um Tennessee was really nice. Um no complaints. The food was good. Everything I would definitely say take a road trip. You I mean if there's a neighboring state just to get away from your, you know, common things you see every day or whatever. I think it was just nice to just do that. It was really just a day and then we left the next day. You know, we experienced some things on the last day, but that was that was nice, too. Um, other things, the Knicks are going to the finals. That is crazy. The Knicks going to the finals in my lifetime is crazy. You know what I mean? Like I was seeing with my boy, mind you, I knew that they swept the Cavs, but I don't know why my brain didn't register. Now they're going to the finals. I kept like I kept thinking to myself now they're going to the Eastern Conference.
But then I thought I'm like then my my boy he said it he was like yo bro no they swept them they're going to the finals. And it really hit me like, yo, New York might win. Like, like New York has a very And you know, I strongly believe the two teams that are left are the only teams that could possibly beat the Thunder because the Knicks got Jaylen Brunson. I watched this dude play in real life, y'all. The brother, it's like he he don't miss like the mid-range. He's probably the best Nick I've ever seen in my lifetime. And I know that's that's controversial because I seen Carmelo, but Melo was nice, but Jaylen Brunson is just a different breed, bro. Like, I've never seen just a dude of his height, his stature, he's not athletic, do what he does.
Like I think bro is either my height or a little bit shorter. I'm 6'2. I don't even think Jaylen Brunson's 6'2. He might be. I think he's like 6'1 or something like that. And then he he's not like a muscular builder or like that. He ain't athletic, jumping high, none of that. But he gets all his buckets that he wants. So y'all know, of course, if the Knicks get to the finals, I'm going for the Knicks. You mean I'm going to take my black ass right home going to the parade cuz I'mma tell you that city's going to go up. That city's going to go up. I'm going home. You know what I mean? Um, and as far as the Spurs and the Thunder, man, look, I I've been seeing all of the memes of the Thunder, bro, I know y'all didn't like when I talked about the Thunder, but I'm about to do it again. I do not want to see them in the finals. Honestly, if the Thunder win in the finals, bro, I I don't really see myself keeping up with basketball like I did in the past.
You know what I mean? Like I do not like the way they play basketball at all.
Like there's a viral video going on right now with De'Arren Fox and um and SGA. This dude SGA falls on almost every jumper. It is disgusting to watch. And everybody wants to say, "Yeah, there's other players that do it.
Other players do it." But this dude does it almost every play. He shoots and falls and the refs give it to him. It is disgust uh uh what do they say?
Egregious hoops. I hate watching that. I hate it. Like I already feel like the NBA is mad soft. And now for this to be introduced and to think there's going to be more players to follow this because he keeps getting MVPs and championships.
The brother got MVPs and didn't statistically win in any column.
I guess he was just valuable just all around. I don't know whatever. But I want to see Wimi whoop them dudes. Um which they did the last game. I think today is game three. Oh no, no, today's game five. Um so you know I'm looking forward to that. Comment below who y'all got in the game tonight.
blowouts like the game that just happened on a good team like the Thunder. I don't really fully trust those blowouts mainly because I don't feel like the Thunder's going to keep losing like that. Like, you know what I mean? Like, there was either somebody in the back office is like, "Nah, bro. We could really run up the views if y'all just keep this series going because people are really watching y'all. It's good for the ad dollars.
So, blow this game like you know what I mean?" But I don't I can't really like go based off of that last game. You know what I mean? It's really going to be tonight's game. Like who's going to allow the other to go up one? That's what is really going to be the determining factor. Cuz I always thought about this like the NBA makes a lot of money off of ads. Like they make a lot of money off of commercials. Like if you watch the finals, the playoffs, they got some good commercials. What if everybody went 4-0? That would cut the duration of the playoffs very short. Taking away a like a huge timeline of ad money. This is the type of sh thinking about taking the timeline of ad money away from the NBA.
Like wouldn't they avoid that, you know?
like that's is what I be thinking like that if anything is rigged I would think that would be why you know that's one of the reasons why um but Jaylen Brown be trying to expose it you know all the time or whatever but anyways y'all um very last thing and I'm going to make a couple more videos uh so y'all stay tuned for those um this week me and my wife go to Barbados I'm extremely excited for that y'all know I turned 30 on Friday it's crazy to even think I made it this far but God has blessed me so much and I'm appreciative. You know what I mean? So, I'mma I'mma be lit all week. You know what I mean? Like, I don't plan on posting too much. I was going to like pre pre, you know, do the videos, but I'm like, bro, just give yourself a break. Just like this past weekend, I was like, man, I'm just giving myself a break. You know what I mean? This the the two weeks right here.
And then we going we going to grind. I mean, when I get back, we going to grind and then I got a couple more trips to do. But yeah, this summer I'm outside.
You know what I mean? on my side. It's my 30th. But anyways, y'all go hit that like button, subscribe button, turn on my post notifications and all that good stuff, man. Until next time, y'all. It's been your boy Tai Boogie.
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