An American's Guide to Surviving Serbian Hospitality 🇷🇸

[00:00:02]of God.

[00:00:11][music] Well, hello and welcome back, Balcon Roots family. I'm so glad to see you for this topic today. This is a fun one. Um, it's my personal experience of surviving Serbian hospitality. And I know that sounds extreme, but I mean it. But I mean it in a good way as well, too. Like when you first experience Serbian hospitality, it could be very, very overwhelming. And these are some tips and tricks to help you. Some things I wish I would have learned, some things I wish I would have knew actually before um enduring [laughter] or experiencing Serbian hospitality. And I will say this, um I grew up in a very diverse background. So, or environment I should say like I went to junior high in Korea Town. I learned how to speedread at Jewish temples. I grew up in a Jewish neighborhood. My friends were Latin and I spent time learning how to salsa dance. I would go to people's homes from India and learn their customs. And so, what I'm saying is is I haven't I've experienced a lot of different cultures and what their hospitality looks like.

[00:01:25]And I would say that the people of Serbia, you guys are right at the top.

[00:01:29]Okay? And some [clears throat] of the best experiences I've had in my life has come from Serbian hospitality.

[00:01:37]So, this is a fun topic, but it is uh funny as well, too. And I'm serious about these tips, okay? So, don't take them lightly. If this is your first time, if you're thinking about going to go visit uh Serbian families for events, whatever it is, like you need to take this survival tips with you, okay, these survival tips. So, here's the first one.

[00:02:01]Let's get right into it. One shot equals three.

[00:02:07]Let me tell you guys, if you're going to taste raia for the first time, I strongly suggest being very careful of trying it with Serbian people for the first time. Okay, one shot equals three.

[00:02:21]And what I mean by that is once you take one, they're going to keep it coming.

[00:02:25]Okay? Um, you'll hear the phrase like, which means one more, but turns into or however you say that grammatically um, correct. But [gasps] these are my tips for that, okay?

[00:02:38]Because you got to think about this.

[00:02:40]Most of the time, because you're foreign, they want to impress you. So, they're going to serve you domestic raia. They are not going to serve you some store-bought raia most of the time, right? And let me tell you, domestic raia does not have a proof on it. Okay.

[00:02:55]You don't because usually when you see a bottle, you see the proof, you kind of know how much you should drink, right?

[00:03:00]If you're a drinker [gasps] and they don't even know how strong it is, right?

[00:03:05]When they give it to you, it's usually in an unmarked clear glass bottle that's been repurposed from like a old bottle of wine or a old Coca-Cola bottle with the label ripped off. And so, be very careful. Here's my tip for you. If you're going to go on ahead and take that leap and try rakia with Serbian people for the first time, always leave your shot glass about half full. Okay?

[00:03:31]Once it's down to the bottom, before you can even put your glass back down on the table, there is somebody already pouring into your cup to fill it up again. It's like they've got a radar and they're watching you, you know, like, is she done? Is she finished? Does she want more? She going to get more.

[00:03:49]I'mma give her more. Yeah. So, it's like it's really intense. Um, my other tip is if you take one shot and you finish it and you want another, but you're kind of done with that, leave that shot glass half full until it's time for you to go.

[00:04:05]Okay? Don't let it go below half. Okay?

[00:04:08]That's my best tip for you. And then you won't have to drink the third cuz the third the third is a charm, you guys.

[00:04:14]All right? Here's the next one. Um, if you're going to go to their events, and I mean any any events such as wedding, a christristing, Christmas, Slava, New Year's, just any type of birthdays, whatever.

[00:04:31][sighs and gasps] Don't eat for about two days. [laughter] Wait, okay, I'm exaggerating a bit, but maybe not so much. like maybe the ne the day before you can fast but at minimum don't eat breakfast that day okay because Serbian events eating is a sport at minimum you're going to see five courses at minimum and I'm talking and this is how it goes right you've got the um shikuri board of different meats and cheeses smoked meats domestic with some bread everybody's having coffee having a cigarette may be talking, you know, then before you know it, the soup comes salad, okay? And then you may have the main course of maybe paprika or sarma.

[00:05:20]Um, and then from there, a platter of assorted meats comes after that. Okay?

[00:05:26]And wait, then you've got dessert. So, pace yourself when you go to these events. And let me tell you, it happens in a slow process. three hours, four hours, five, six, easy. Okay, it goes down. You've got Make sure you've gotten your rest. Okay, don't show up tired.

[00:05:46]You better have had a nap. That's my suggestion. Okay, so don't eat breakfast at minimum and at least take a nap and pace yourself, okay? [sighs] [gasps] Trust me, you'll thank me later.

[00:05:59][laughter] or if not, you'll end up just picking up a bunch of weight like I did and getting extra fat cuz boy, um they may ask you if you want more more than three times and it's like dang, right? So three times that's generous. Okay, I've been at places and events where they didn't ask me about five and six times and after a while I'm just like all right, dang, just bring it. you know, um yeah, they want to make sure you're good. Okay, that's it. And it's out of love, but you do feel badgered. Okay. And um they're damn near standing over you with the pot and the spoon waiting for your last and then before you know it, they're they're pouring and it's just it's overwhelming.

[00:06:50]So, um I'll tell you guys, I had a hard time saying no. Okay, this is why I'm telling you guys this. And if you're prepared and you have it in your mind, it'll be much easier to stand firm and say no. They won't take offense to it.

[00:07:05]And you may be worried about that at first when you're new to this. But trust me, they won't. Okay? As long as you at least have some of it. Now, if you come there and you don't have nothing at all, that's when they're going to take offense, right? Um, what's next? Oh, gifts for you to bring. So, you might be wondering whenever you are invited to an event or a house, you always want to make sure that you don't come empty-handed.

[00:07:31]And what you can bring at minimum, Serbia makes it so easy because it is tradition and customary to at minimum bring chocolate, coffee, wine, or just so you know, if you guys are my friend or if you ever meet me and you want to bring me a gift, please bring me. That's what I prefer. But I feel like wine is a bit more common. At least in this region it is. Um, and I'm grateful for either or, but I'm just saying. So anyway, take those three things and you can never go wrong. That way you don't have to worry about like what should I bring. Bring something, but don't go empty-handed, okay? If you're a vegan, more than likely you won't be coming to the village, okay? Or any type of village in Serbia. Your best bet is to stay near the cities where you have options of eating because if you notice everything that I mentioned except for the salad and the bread is what you would be eating at a Serbian event. It is meat city around here unapologetically. And you might be offended when you see a whole pig sitting on top of a table fully roasted and cooked. Hoofs and all snout ears everything. They don't take nothing off.

[00:08:40]Okay, [laughter] that's the roasted pig. So yeah. Um, and even the soup made with eggs. So, if you're vegan, be cautious and be ready, okay? Um, and let your guests know in advance, okay? Don't throw them off because they're not as open-minded about that here in this region. They're like, "What? You don't eat meat?" Like, [laughter] so yeah. Um, it's overwhelming with that. Um, be careful for when you are with someone, they say, "Hey, I just want to stop by here real quick." Okay. A lot of times real quick is not real quick. A lot of times real quick turns into three hours. My husband would be like, "Hey, you know, I want to go over to this person's house and go pick something up real quick. You want to come with me?"

[00:09:25]And then before you know it, that turns into 3 hours and then we're stuck. So listen, real quick is never real quick.

[00:09:31]You will find yourself stuck there. And it's a beautiful thing. You really don't want to say no. And people just love to enjoy people. and being able to have coffee together. It is a special intimate moment with the people of Serbia. And so just be careful when someone says they want to stop by somewhere real quick, okay? Cuz it's going to be more than real quick. I promise you that. So there's certain songs that when they come on towards the end of the night of a Serbian event, this is when you're going to see grown men cry. This is when you might be a little bit confused. They may look a little angry. They may look happy. They may they they give off so many emotions.

[00:10:12]And it's because these songs usually they come at the end of the night when everybody's tow up and drunk and they are from a different time. It brings them back memories and nostalgia from Yugoslavia, you know, war, things they've endured, things like that. So, they're deeply emotional songs and you'll see grown men crying. So, it could be a bit overwhelming. They're throwing glass. They doing all types of stuff. So look, um, let me give you a suggestion. Stay out the way. Take another shot yourself. And when they had that moment when they throw their hair back and their arms are up and they are singing at the top of their lungs, even if they cracking notes, everything, but at that moment, that's when you give them a hug.

[00:10:57][music] >> [music] [singing] >> Yeah, you are not.

[00:11:10][music] [music] >> You'll see. You'll notice everybody's hugging each other. They crying, all types of stuff. Join in and give a hug.

[00:11:27]And that's the best way to survive that moment. Okay. Um, sometimes Serbs will send you home with so much stuff that you feel like you went grocery shopping. I've been to people's houses and they've either just butchered their chickens or went in their garden. They have an abundance of potatoes and they got a whole chicken. I went to someone's house for the very first time. First time meeting them, had coffee with them. They served us sausage. They served us cookies. And then when we left the chickens that they had just butchered, they send us one home. [laughter] So it Serbian hospitality is amazing and it'll throw you off at first when you're taking so many things. And I know some people can kind of feel guilty when they're walking away with so much, but this is what they want for you. And especially if they know that you are new and you are foreign, what they will do is they will even send you away with some domestic things and say, "Hey, you know what? Before you leave and go back to wherever you're going, come back and pick up some of these. I'm going to get you some more of this if you show that you like the things that they shared with you. So, that's pretty awesome, you know, and you can pay them back by doing what? Don't forget, coffee, either racho or wine and chocolate. [laughter] Um, the love language of Serbs can be very sarcastic, full of truth, full of honesty, unsolicited advice. Um, and it reminds me of the phrase I'm actually going to be doing a video you guys next on my favorite Serbian things. I can't wait. But this phrase is um in Serbian is bezel naiku, which means without a hair on his or her tongue. And it just means that they could just be very blunt and honest. And it could be a little bit hard to deal with at first when you first get a chance to get to know Serbs.

[00:13:13]um you could be offended, you know, but for me, I think it's one of the things that I love best about the people because I know what I'm going to get.

[00:13:20]You know, I come from a background where it's just so much fakery. But with serves, oh, you going to know if they like something, if they don't like something, if they like you, if they don't like you, if they think you should do something or you shouldn't have done something, like you going to get it, okay? They going to tell you. So anyways, you guys, those are my things as far as the survival kit and survival tips of dwelling in Serbian hospitality.

[00:13:47]And if you think that I like forgot some things or something you want to add that you learned or that you know, put it down in the comments down below. And yeah, I hope to see you guys on the next video where I'm talking about my favorite Serbian sayings. And these are going to be fun. All right, you guys.

[00:14:05]See you next time. Ciao.