Trump Just Ended Hasan Piker's Whole Career!

Added: 2026-05-28

[00:00:00]All right, let's go. It's starting to feel like the walls are closing in on communist [ __ ] Hassan [ __ ] >> Please, President Trump, I'll suck your sack dry, drink your stinky golden nectar, or eat your dingleberries.

[00:00:15]Just let me stay in America.

[00:00:17]>> And just a little backstory for anyone who has not been following this. Hassan [ __ ] the far-left Marxist streamer, is now dealing with federal scrutiny after reports revealed investigators subpoenaed him over a so-called humanitarian trip to Cuba, which is probably not the kind of government attention you want after spending years calling America evil on Twitch.

[00:00:38]>> America deserved 9/11, dude. I'm saying >> I'm sure Charlie Kirk is smiling down from heaven at the thought of Hassan [ __ ] going to jail. In any case, few things are more satisfying than when you see commies getting subpoenenaed.

[00:00:56]Is not great. Okay. I mean, it's [ __ ] but still not great.

[00:01:05]>> Yeah, I got to agree. Facing up to 10 years in prison and millions of dollars in fines and penalties, not great for anybody.

[00:01:12]>> Hey guys, check out my new tattoo. It's totally awesome. I put it on my neck to show I'm super cool. And this uniform, it's my favorite color, pink. Pink makes everything better, even this symbol.

[00:01:22]>> So, you know, we got a lot to talk about in this video. From what it would look like if surprise finger in the butt was a face to Governor Gavin Newsome's favorite cookbook. And from what it's like celebrating 6 years of sobriety to undoubtedly the biggest tragedy of that historic day, the fact that gas was only 189 a gallon. And as we remember the patron saint of fentinel, we must also remember the time Minnesota Mayor Jacob Frey failed at pandering to the BLM race hustlers and was subjected to a humiliating ritual.

[00:01:55]>> Go homeac.

[00:01:59]>> This is the channel always willing to step up and ask the tough questions like what does the average liberal male look like on the way to get his wife's boyfriend a pack of Newports? Is it true that non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin? Sure, it tastes the same, but that [ __ ] ain't right. What does it feel like when you're getting ready to hit the dance floor after taking a bump and dump in the men's room? Am I the only one who thinks lunch is now $28 cuz everyone freaked out about the flu for 2 years? How pissed is Millie Vanilli right now watching untalented people get famous from lip-syncing on TikTok? Did anyone happen to catch Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce courtside at the Cavs Knicks game? And maybe most importantly of all, should someone check in on Steve Kerr after seeing Jackson Dart on stage with Donald Trump? But at least we can draw inspiration from the senior quote of incoming Fed chairman Kevin Walsh. A quick thank you to IT Trust Capital who continues to sponsor whatever the hell it is we do on this channel. So now they've added stocks because apparently the idea is why not put everything you're already arguing about on the internet into one portfolio and just let it simmer for like 30 years. cryptos, stocks, gold, silver. It's like they built a retirement account for people who don't trust retirement accounts. So, I'm probably supposed to say something inspiring here, like take control of your financial future. But, I think at this point, everyone's just trying to lose money slightly slower than inflation. So, if you want an account where you can at least choose your flavor of financial anxiety, use my link below and ITR will give you an extra $100 funding bonus when you sign up. In other news, Packers running back Josh Jacobs was arrested and booked on five charges, including strangling his girlfriend. Obviously, this is horrible, and he faces multiple years in prison if convicted. But at least he didn't introduce our president at a rally. That would have been really bad. There are only two groups of people who are Democrats now. Only two. There's these super rich Kairens who they can be whatever they want because it doesn't really matter. So, they can live in the world of ideas. And there's unfortunately really poor folks who've been given money by the Democrats taking money from the super rich to pay them off. They've lost the middle class completely. Multiple sources are now reporting that Patton Oswald is in fact the fat Dixie Chick.

[00:04:13]>> What the [ __ ] is that?

[00:04:15]>> The late show with Steven Colbear is officially over. I hated the show, but I do feel bad for my friend Jamal who got fired. His job was to be the one black person. It is kind of crazy that it took this many people to write the one joke, "Donald Trump is bad." Drew Kerry goes on a foul-mouth rant about Spencer Pratt's LA mayoral run. [ __ ] this guy.

[00:04:37]True story. When I was 19 years old, I was at the world famous Spearmint Rhino in Van Eyes, California. Still there today. And uh it was a off day. Tuesday, Wednesday, don't ask me. I'm 19 years old. but sitting there with a friend and all of a sudden Drew Kerry walks in, goes straight to the bar, talks to the bartender for a second, does a little pointing around at different girls. All of a sudden, he walks to the back room.

[00:05:03]We don't think much of it. Little bit later, girl comes over. My friend says, "Hey, was that Drew Cary?" The stripper says, "Yeah, he comes in here all the time. Usually picks out the newest girls. Drops about $10,000. All he wants to do is smell some vagina. I don't have a problem with it, but that's not a guy I'm taking political advice from. This is Wild from Joy AI. We're hiring 10 masturbation consultants. $2,000 per month to test our new daily guided masturbation feature and document the effects on stress, sleep, and mood. I can only imagine listing this on your resume. You'd be meeting with a recruiter. Uh, can you tell us about your previous role consulting for an AI wellness startup? Ben Stiller posts that he wants to take it to seven guys.

[00:05:51]Obviously, in an effort to break his record of six guys, but it's like I always say, Ben, nine guys or it didn't happen. So, as we say goodbye to swamp creatures like Jasmine Crockett, the race baiting Geico caveman Al Green, and the decrepit drunk [ __ ] Nancy Pelosi, I am reminded of the quote from Plato in the Republic. One of the penalties for refusing to participate in politics is that you end up being governed by your inferiors. PLEASE, TRUMP, I'LL DO ANYTHING. I'LL [ __ ] SUCK YOUR DICK.

[00:06:20]YOU WANT ME TO EAT YOUR [ __ ] I'LL EAT YOUR [ __ ] [ __ ] ON THE WHITE HOUSE LAWN.