My Most Recent Philosophical Transformation

追加: 2026-05-22

[00:00:01]Hello everyone. I thought I would talk to you about my most recent philosophical um transformation.

[00:00:10]And I just thought I would give you a little behind the scenes. And if I seem a little sluggish, it's because I am uh really tired right now. I've been up a long time, but I just thought I would film this before I go to bed, even though you can see the strain under my eyes.

[00:00:26]Um but um anyway, I I have undergone a a philosophical transformation, I think, in recent months.

[00:00:35]Um that some of you may have noticed.

[00:00:39]Um but lately I've been moving in a different direction um with uh the the channel and uh my image and uh so on to a degree.

[00:00:51]And some of you may have noticed that I have been um I have been um I have been more elitist, I guess you could say, in my um views lately that I have been uh espousing more elitist uh views.

[00:01:09]And that that's no accident because I'm for the for the longest time I tried to be more diplomatic. I tried to be uh to come across as kind, respectful, um empathetic.

[00:01:25]And I still want to be those things, but not in the same way that I was before. I I was I was I was engaging in a a kind of uh what you might call politeness or decorum that um that is indistinguishable from from other writers and other uh BookTube and AuthorTube channels and so on.

[00:01:49]And I think I was engaging in a false uh modesty that a lot of uh writers and uh BookTube and AuthorTube channels engage in.

[00:02:02]And after a while, I just and lately I've been starting to think that I have this, you know, a writing gift, you know.

[00:02:14]I I have I have the ability to write uh poetically and and beautifully.

[00:02:20]And why should I be modest about that?

[00:02:23]Why shouldn't I try to be completely confident in myself?

[00:02:31]Why shouldn't I try to be different than other people? Why Why shouldn't Why shouldn't I try to distinguish my myself by saying, "Well, you know what?

[00:02:43]Not everyone can become a writer.

[00:02:45]Egalitarianism is a lie." That's something I believed for a long time, but I never really thought to voice it.

[00:02:51]And I just think that I can distinguish myself more by taking positions that I believe are um not just contrarian for their own sake, but that I think um that I think actually align with reality over what I would call politeness or decorum. I think that would better serve me if I were to go against the grain, so to speak, of the culture that tells you that everyone is the same or that everyone is special.

[00:03:25]And it would be better if I take on a position of well, no, not everyone is equal, not everyone is equally talented, not everyone is equally beautiful.

[00:03:37]Um and I I think that I have been I will be better served to go in that direction.

[00:03:44]Um because I I have had for the longest time and we just use surrounding writing and art and all of that, but I was always more polite in in discussing it, but I don't think I want to be as polite anymore. Um, I think I want to be a harder in my views and to have higher aesthetic standards and to actually uh and to actually be be consistent um with all of my beliefs. Um, I want to be, so to speak, um the the bad boy of literature. I want to I want to be a bad boy of literature.

[00:04:25]Um, so someone who uh challenges, who is a contrarian, who who who makes praise earned and not something that is just automatically given.

[00:04:38]I want to be someone who um makes uh writing into something um uh sensual. Um, something that is deeply powerful that is ba- that is based on to a degree um hierarchy and the idea of something only being sensual or or beautiful because other people are excluded from that. Um, these are principles that I have come to believe in uh uh recently or or at least embrace fully. I've I've been developing these principles over over over a period of years, but this is the first time that I've actually come to really um believe in them.

[00:05:19]Um, and embrace them.

[00:05:23]And it it's just that um I I believe that this makes uh uh writing uh far more precious because for the for the longest time um I was trying to hold the view of, "Okay, all writing is I mean, I have these elite standards, but at the same time writing is subjective." But that's obviously contradictory. Elitism means nothing if everything is subjective.

[00:05:47]Um and so what I have been doing in recent months though is that I have been trying to um to cast off so to speak um a false modest modesty as well as a conscience that has been telling me okay no you you don't want to do this.

[00:06:06]But um but I actually think though that I would be better served and my writing would be better served and my and my channel would be better served if I went in this direction because I do think that right but that by an embracing these elitist views um my writing is taking on a sensual um a power um that is that is that is quite intoxicating and I think that a lot of this um this transformation started though few months ago um back when um back when um this person contacted me and asked me um if they and showed me some of their writing and they said in an email and they said uh "Well, do you think do you think that my writing is any good? Do you think I have natural talent?" Now last year I probably would have balked and tried to be polite or dodge the question.

[00:07:02]But I thought why not tell this person the truth and and live consistently within my philosophy.

[00:07:10]And so I told them I said I see no indication of natural talent. Obviously I'm not God. I can't I can't make uh predictions. But but even saying that saying well I don't see it even that seemed radical to me. But when I said it um something seemed to break inside of me.

[00:07:26]Uh something seemed um to to break where finally where and because that person ultimately seemed because they ultimately seemed grateful um that were because their reply was well I needed to hear it." Um well, then I thought, "Well, uh maybe this is something that people actually want to hear. Maybe it is the case um that people actually um wanted to hear that perhaps they may not have it.

[00:07:58]Maybe that's something that people actually want. Maybe people are actually tired of false modesty. Maybe they act What they actually want is honesty.

[00:08:06]Maybe they What they What they actually want is hierarchy. Because in a hierarchy, you can you can take you can take comfort in in knowing your limits so you can actually pursue your full potential than believing in believing than believing in false potential. And so I actually I actually think that a lot of that that there are more people out there who actually may perhaps have um these hierarchical views um than previously thought. It's just that they have been trained not to express them.

[00:08:39]Um I see I I I I have been seeing this everywhere. Um for example, um uh last year or maybe the year before, I can't remember, there was a a woman who who critiqued some of my elitist views on Tik Tok and um did a response video and then she bought my book and I thought, "Well, the I think it it was the ecstasy and the ignominy." And I thought, "Well, surely she's going to trash it."

[00:09:05]But she didn't actually uh trash it. She gave it five stars despite the fact that she um had called me an elitist and I thought, "Well, aesthetic power at um the power of a poetic prose and aesthetic when it's powerful it can override even critics."

[00:09:21]Which to me uh lends that lends credibility to the idea that my elitist views um are in fact rooted in reality and some people try um to deny it um with with uh with false uh notions of egalitarianism, but even they in many cases will back down once they are confronted with true aesthetic brilliance.

[00:09:46]And so and so recently I I have just realized it that there are more people out there who have who have these views that I realized it's just in many cases they won't express it publicly um because of they worry about their careers and reputations and other things, but what I have what I have now decided that I want to do is that I actually want to get more people to adopt my philosophy.

[00:10:11]I want to be an an I want to evangelize so to speak for my views. I wanted to be I wanted to be I want to convert people to my to my way of thinking to to these elitist and hierarchical views because I think through that we can actually we can actually bring in a new era of art, literature, and culture.

[00:10:36]And so I'm trying to cast off so to speak my good boy image and and embrace um the the bad boy image so to speak.

[00:10:46]And so that that is why I have a philosophically transformed recently.

[00:10:52]Still trying to remain grounded, still trying to still trying to um not let these views make it where I'm not treating people with respect because I still want to treat people with respect, but you can have respect for people and still have high aesthetic standards at the same time. So So if you've wondered why I I I may have changed recently, I I hope I've given you it to some insight into why into how my philosophy has been developing. So thank you so much for listening.