The Truth About Illegal Immigration

Added: 2026-05-13

[00:00:00]Yep. Dealing with immigration is England's true national sport. We invented it. We're terrible at it. And we're getting absolutely humiliated by the French.

[00:00:09]So, here's where we're at. The issue here is not immigration. It's inequality.

[00:00:13]>> Anyone that comes illegally into Britain on a boat or in the back of a lorry will be detained and deported.

[00:00:19]>> Refugees are welcome here.

[00:00:23]>> Can we agree first that so far your government has simply failed to smash the gangs? In recent years, the UK has seen around 40 to 50,000 people arriving on our shores by small boat annually.

[00:00:35]That may sound like a lot, and that's because, as they say at the Adam Smith Institute, a metric ton. So, while parties like the Greens may say the country isn't being replaced, let's be real. 50,000 people illegally arriving annually is a midsize town arriving each year. Me, it's basically Stevenage.

[00:00:55]Every year, a new Stevenage. God help us. Although to be fair, nothing can be worse than Stevenage. And then you get into the fact that most of these people who come here don't speak the language or appreciate the culture. And yet have somehow still figured out the benefit system faster than you can say, "I can't work, mate. I've got ADHD."

[00:01:15]Although in fairness, half of Liverpool doesn't speak the language or understand the culture either. And we let them vote. The real irony is we're in Ireland. You don't sneak into the UK by accident. This isn't the women's changing room at Pure Gym. This is very conspicuous geography asking, "Are you sure at every stage of the journey?" The powers that be will tell you the country isn't being replaced. And technically, they're correct. It's being expanded.

[00:01:40]Like a loft conversion no one asked for, paid for by credit cards no one's reading the statements on. Quick question. Why is it that when Trump tries to buy Greenland, the left insist Greenland is for Greenlanders? But the moment we suggest British for the British, it's called xenophobia.

[00:02:00]Funny how natism is a human right everywhere except at home. Greenlanders, noble custodians of their ancestral land. The British, weird little gammons who need to be re-educated. It turns out protect the local culture is progressive everywhere on Earth except this bit of earth I'm standing on. Anyway, I'm asking too many questions now. Once people arrive here illegally, they don't just spawn into the system as Uber Eats drivers. There's a bit more paperwork before they're hurtling the wrong way down Tottenham Court Road on a line bike. They enter what we politely call the process, which is British fault.

[00:02:37]We've lost track of you, but in a politically acceptable way. So they go into accommodation, processing, legal appeals, local authority support, health care access. In other words, they enter a system designed to keep them exactly where they are because the asylum accommodation system alone has been estimated at around 4 million quid a day at peak pressure points. That's 28 million quid a week, 1.4 4 billion a year and over a decade more than 15 million. I mean at this point even the immigrants are like this seems a bit fiscally irresponsible. For 15 billion you could have built actual processing centers. You could have built a wall.

[00:03:19]You could have built a navy. You could have built a human catapult for God's sakes. Instead we've built and I cannot stress this enough sweet fa. We're not solving the problem. We're subscribing to it. But the world's most expensive specialist only fans specializing in brown men cucks white country. Now everyone's favorite rage bait, the hotels. At various points, tens of thousands of asylum seekers have been housed in hotels. And this is where it gets politically explosive because hotels are visible and catastrophically expensive. So you get the headline logic. We're spending billions of pounds on people we haven't decided what to do with, staying in rooms nicer than most people get to live in in this country, while British pensioners are choosing between heating and eating, and some Albanian bloke is getting room service in a travel lodge. This is what compassion looks like. And this is the moment your group chat switches from memes to manifestos because the UK has accidentally built a system where if you arrive, you are immediately given something millions of working people can't afford. It's a reverse meritocracy with a huge backlog. Over 100,000 claims sitting in the system at once. People waiting months, sometimes years for an initial decision. A 100,000 claims. For perspective, that's more unresolved cases in the Metropolitan Police, unless of course you tweeted something spicy, in which case you're doing time in Alcatraz. And here's the uncomfortable economic truth. Delay is a business model. The system doesn't have a backlog. The backlog has a system because every month you don't decide a case, you're still paying for accommodation, support, admin, legal processing. So the system doesn't cost money because people arrive. It costs money because the state has built a machine whose primary output is waiting.

[00:05:18]A 15 billion quid rating room where the only thing moving quickly is the invoice. Britain can't manufacture cars, ships or steel. But by God, we can manufacture a bill. And let's not forget the UK has been paying France significant sums to reduce channel crossings and strengthen enforcement.

[00:05:38]Hundreds of millions of pounds have been sent to fund French patrol surveillance and deterrence measures. It's like paying your neighbor to stop his cat from in your garden while the neighbor just uses the money to buy the cat more expensive tuna. And despite all that, the crossing still continue because enforcement doesn't stop the system. It just tweaks it at the edges. It reduces flow at the margins, but it doesn't remove the incentive structure.

[00:06:07]It just moves a problem slightly to the left. We just can't seem to nail it.

[00:06:13]Rwanda too mean. Stopping the boats too effective. Best we can do is pay the French and virtue signal while the dingies keep coming. Peak British governance. So politically it becomes well we spent 600 million quid stopping it and it still exists. 600 million quid. For context, that's three new hospitals or one HS2 toilet, which is a uniquely British outcome. We're the only country that would spend half a billion quid on a fence and then leave the gate open because we didn't want to seem racist.