Biochemist reacts to Spiders explained by More Parz | Runya Reacts

[00:00:00]Okay, then I'll guess we'll which one.

[00:00:02]He's a vampire. Honestly, it's an adorable spider. Like look at this distinguished gentleman. Look at him. He's such a distinguished gentleman.

[00:00:13]>> Spider, he's a vampire.

[00:00:16]>> I don't like spiders, okay? I'm I'm also not the biggest fan of spiders, but gosh, he's such a distinguished gentleman.

[00:00:23]>> Just not the way you think it is. This adorable little guy is literally called a vampire spider. And as you might expect as for something named after Dracula, it craves one thing, blood.

[00:00:37]>> Blood?

[00:00:38]>> Just one >> That's That's not a spooder.

[00:00:42]>> Tiny teeny little problem with that.

[00:00:45]They They can't [ __ ] get it themselves.

[00:00:48]>> Oh.

[00:00:49]>> You see, vampire spiders are a species of jumping spider. And jumping spiders basically >> Honestly, jumping spiders are so cute.

[00:00:57]>> never bite people or other mammals.

[00:01:00]Second off, they don't even have the right equipment to get your blood out.

[00:01:04]>> I don't think you have the facilities for that, big man.

[00:01:06]>> Cuz I didn't call it a little guy for nothing. They are only a completely average 0.

[00:01:14]>> No. Wait, they're zero That is tiny. That's not me, guys.

[00:01:21]Reminds me to complete watching the Castlevania series. Do it.

[00:01:25]They're only They're not Ronia size.

[00:01:26]They're tiny.

[00:01:27]>> 3 in wide. That >> I did not expect it from the from the from the picture. They look way bigger in the picture.

[00:01:34]It looks bigger. It looks bigger IRL, guys. Trust Trust. It looks It's not just a picture. I look bigger IRL, guys.

[00:01:42]Trust Trust.

[00:01:43]>> I STRAIGHT DO NOT HAVE the strength or length to penetrate your skin.

[00:01:49]So that begs the question, where the [ __ ] do they get their blood? I mean, what could a spider possibly get its hands on that carries human blood?

[00:02:03]>> Oh my goodness, there are such gigachads.

[00:02:06]They take mosquito Oh gosh, are they gigachads? Lexington Steele mentioned.

[00:02:12]That's what she said.

[00:02:13]>> Got you. It's from mosquitoes.

[00:02:16]The vamp spiders specifically target these annoying [ __ ] but not just mozzies in general. No, they wait for them to bite something first.

[00:02:27]>> I mean, how would they get the blood otherwise, right? I know butterflies drink blood at two if they can. I know.

[00:02:34]There are also some bats that drink blood. Like literally.

[00:02:38]>> And then, once they've completed the blood heist and try to make off with the goods, the vamp spider hits the mozzie with a "The [ __ ] do you think you're going, cunt?" and jumps it.

[00:02:49]Murdering the mosquito and sucking the blood out as I >> Okay, that's a wild picture.

[00:02:59]Okay, whoever is taking these pictures How good is the person who's taking these pictures?

[00:03:11]That is so so good.

[00:03:16]Like like like in general like just Holy shoot. They're a friend. Yeah. That pic goes so hard. It's like a little cocktail glass on them. Yeah.

[00:03:26]It's cute, too.

[00:03:28]Is it? I just wish the vampire spider would get their mosquitoes before they suck me and they suck me off.

[00:03:35]Yeah, but then they wouldn't get the blood.

[00:03:38]I've done some macro photography. It's extremely hard. Understandable, and you need so much light. Yeah. Like look at how the light also reflects off the spider and the wings. Like the wings.

[00:03:49]Look at this. The It's like >> Like sweet treat. I guess if it's a vampire that kills vampires, it it's less Dracula and and more a blade spider.

[00:03:59]>> Second hand vampire.

[00:04:01]>> [music] >> It's a it's a second hand >> Everyone thinks it's a spider.

[00:04:05]>> vampire.

[00:04:06]>> This spider is a cowboy.

[00:04:07]>> I want to be a cowboy, baby.

[00:04:10]>> This is a bolas >> Look at how freaking chunky it is. Like look at the chunky boy. Hi Elian.

[00:04:20]Thank you. Thank you, Fluffy. Look at the chunky boy.

[00:04:24]>> spider. And you can probably find one in your backyard because they are [ __ ] everywhere. USA, Mexico, South America, Madagascar, and of course Australia.

[00:04:35]>> But not Europe. It has nipples. Yeah, it does look like nipples. It it definitely looks like nipples. It just just just a little bit LOOKS LIKE NIPPLES.

[00:04:43]>> AUSTRALIA >> just a little bit looks like nipples.

[00:04:48]>> And the reason I'm calling it a cowboy is cuz it uses its web like a lasso.

[00:04:52]>> No.

[00:04:54]>> You see, where a standard spider sweats its ass off spinning thousands of strands into some elaborate art piece hoping that a fly headbutts it, the bolas spider does not [ __ ] with that complicated [ __ ] >> I mean, I think throwing a lasso is really complicated as well.

[00:05:16]>> up a single strand of web with a sticky bit at the end. Kind of like one of those plastic hands you used to get as a kid. Yoink. And instead >> I never got one of those.

[00:05:28]Story of my life, guys.

[00:05:29]>> praying to God that a fly shows up, the bolas spider has a guaranteed way to grab a meal. Seduction.

[00:05:38]>> Oh, what what? No.

[00:05:40]>> You see, these bad boys can produce chemicals that >> They can produce kind of like pheromones.

[00:05:48]>> Perfectly mimic the pheromones of a female moth looking to reproduce.

[00:05:56]>> Okay.

[00:05:57]I love nature. Have I already told you?

[00:05:59]How many times have I told you that I love nature? I love nature. I love nature. Neat. It is very neat. They work like two to three times.

[00:06:09]They are so dirty that they are not sticky anymore. So, don't be sad.

[00:06:13]That's catfishing. No, it's not catfishing.

[00:06:18]It's fly fishing. No, moth fishing.

[00:06:20]Sorry, it's it's about moths. So, it's moth fishing. Hi, Hera.

[00:06:26]>> The males then catch the scent of the hot single moths in your area ad and fly towards it like a pie on the window sill.

[00:06:34]>> She doesn't look like she looked at her profile picture.

[00:06:37]>> However, upon arrival, they do not find their moth bride.

[00:06:42]>> Hola, bro.

[00:06:43]No baby for you.

[00:06:44]>> find something that looks suspiciously like a strand of spider web. And while our moth friend here is trying to come to terms with the fact that he's been catfished, >> Hold up. Wait a minute. Something ain't right.

[00:06:56]>> THE BOLAS TOSSES OUT THAT WEB STRAND, sticks it to the moth, and [ __ ] pipes it. [screaming] Dragging the very confused and >> That is insane.

[00:07:09]>> probably still a little aroused moth into the branches >> at how big the moth is as well.

[00:07:13]>> and pump full of poison.

[00:07:15]>> Oh. Oh, of course it's poi Of course it's poisonous. Of Of course. What did I Why did I even think it's not poisonous?

[00:07:22]Why did I even think it's like a normal spider that just like lets it die? Why did I not see Oh.

[00:07:28]>> Sorry, man. That's so [ __ ] funny.

[00:07:31]>> [laughter] >> I hope my thought he was going to continue his blood >> Yeah, it's actually fishing. Yeah, it's actually moth fishing.

[00:07:37]>> and I just know on the way up to the spider, he was talking like, >> So, no head?

[00:07:43]>> Nope.

[00:07:45]>> I have this one as well. Okay, dancing spider.

[00:07:49]>> AUSTRALIA HAS dancing spiders.

[00:07:55]Hello.

[00:07:55]>> Oh, I know this one. This one is so beautiful.

[00:07:58]>> Let me introduce you to >> Like not the video, but the spider.

[00:08:00]>> And then under this most fabulous arachnid, the peacock spider.

[00:08:05]Now, this eight-legged pride flag is not remotely dangerous to humans.

[00:08:10]>> Kind of interesting.

[00:08:10]>> Got full venom.

[00:08:12]Tiny things. And as far as size goes, THEY'RE THE SPIDER equivalent of a >> Okay, it's honestly, this is not a branch.

[00:08:20]What is this then? What is this? Is this Is this like a I don't know. Like Is it Is it a pencil?

[00:08:26]>> No.

[00:08:29]>> Damn, WHY ARE THEY SO TEENY TINY?

[00:08:31]>> What makes these little guys interesting is their love lives. You see, not unlike normal peacocks, it's only the males of the species that are running the RGB game of life.

[00:08:42]>> [music] >> But why are they built like a Razer laptop? WELL, BECAUSE SPIDERS CAN'T JUST POST UP with a dead fly on Tinder and start swiping.

[00:08:50]No, no. The boys here have to attract the lady the old-fashioned way.

[00:08:54]>> I love that because it's not just spiders that do that. Obviously, a lot of birds do that. And there is so many cool birds that have like the wildest freaking mating ritual dances. It is so interesting. I love that. I love that so much. I so I love seeing that. There is so many amazing freaking birds.

[00:09:18]I think they existed exactly one family of spiders who don't have venomous glands. They are Uloboridae.

[00:09:26]But compared to other spiders, they are in the minority. Interesting.

[00:09:30]>> Take a note.

[00:09:32]You see, in order to find a mate, peacock spiders head out to the club and find a lady across the dance floor. They then lock eyes with her and as the song changes >> So cute.

[00:09:41]>> they raise THAT COLORED DUMP TRUCK TO THE SKY, start playing Dance Dance Revolution, baby.

[00:09:47]>> and then and then they shake it.

[00:09:49]And they shake it. Oh, yeah.

[00:09:51]>> Now, as he dances, the female spider watches very closely, not only paying attention >> And she's judging cha cha. She's judging if if he doesn't impress No [ __ ] >> to the movements of the >> No [ __ ] >> but also the [ __ ] vibrations.

[00:10:09]And if our protagonist here >> If he doesn't do good No [ __ ] Good night, hero.

[00:10:15]>> can nail OSU Valentine's edition just [screaming] right.

[00:10:21]The female spider will slowly approach, lean in for a kiss, and >> Oh, oh, oh, that escalated quickly.

[00:10:35]Oh my.

[00:10:35]>> Here's the thing. If he [ __ ] up the dance, he fails the charisma check.

[00:10:41]And if he fails the charisma check >> No [ __ ] >> he's no longer boyfriend material.

[00:10:45]>> Uh-oh.

[00:10:46]>> He's a [ __ ] happy meal.

[00:10:48]>> I know.

[00:10:50]Of course he is. Of course. Of course he Well, that was That was dumb. All right, P. Rest in peace. I don't like you. What do you mean like me? We we actually We actually asked the AI how much rizz I have and the AI was like I have an eight out of 10 rizz, okay, bum?

[00:11:19]The the AI ChatGPT attested me an eight out of 10 rizz.

[00:11:25]You would be dead 200%.

[00:11:29]True, Jenny. True.

[00:11:31]She She did not go with me.

[00:11:33]>> I don't know what you're talking about.

[00:11:35]We There we go.

[00:11:36]A strongly worded letter. No. Five or six out of 10 after further questions.

[00:11:41]Yeah, because we talked about the mating rituals of um Antiknisis. Okay. Chad says no. I had I have very much risk, okay? No. No. No.

[00:11:49]No. No. A I also said I had an eight out of 10 risk, okay? Because I suggested going to a concert after I just met a person at a party and we talked about music. Yeah. Sure, but don't worry. Can make up for it with with the luck I'm not cute. We just feed the AI with the data for it so it knows it's a solid What a solid eight is. No.

[00:12:09]No. Not antique anuses. No.

[00:12:13]Okay. Next spider video.

[00:12:16]>> of spiders.

[00:12:18]BUT DID YOU KNOW SPIDERS >> GOD. I would scream so much if I had >> scared of spiders. More specifically, this [ __ ] demon.

[00:12:28]That is an assassin spider. And as with most things that make you physically recoil from the screen, yeah, it's found in [ __ ] Australia.

[00:12:36]>> Yeah. Yeah, of course it's found in Australia. Of course it is.

[00:12:39]>> makes a lot of sense when you learn that this ET-looking [ __ ] was designed in a lab by God himself for one purpose: turning their extended family tree into a [ __ ] McDonald's menu.

[00:12:53]>> Let me get a >> These things eat exclusively other spiders. And the way they execute their cousins is by using their own tools against them. See, they start their hunts by finding a succulent arachnid meal hanging out in its web.

[00:13:13]The assassin walks over and starts playing that silk like it's [ __ ] Guitar Hero.

[00:13:23]>> Wait. They They make it so that that it like swings?

[00:13:31]No.

[00:13:34]It looks like a mind flayer. It does look like a mind flayer.

[00:13:39]That is I I'm sure that it will be like vibrations and the vibrations will lead to um lead to it like like dropping out of the uh nest. That is my guess. Obviously, I don't quite know it, but Ah, that is the one I already posted about. That it looks so weird, but it has another name. I posted about this.

[00:14:05]Like I already saw it um on a different website, but oh gosh, I think it also has another name. I just need to figure out what the name was. Wait, let me check. Buna posts so much. I saw it at I saw it on Buna's Twitter. One second.

[00:14:20]Oh, yeah. Those are in German in German they're called No, wait. I didn't I didn't I did not No, wait. No, no, no. The fact was that their neck is as long as like like they have like a long neck.

[00:14:41]Wait, long neck spider.

[00:14:47]Oh, no, they are just called long neck spider. Pelican spider. Yeah. Yeah, okay. I knew I knew that photo, but I only knew it because um of the long neck. I saw I I saw that spider already.

[00:15:00]Uh but only um because of their long necks. Because like wait a second. We're We're at 1 minute. Um if you look at it, like this spider oh Cat, can you baby baby baby this spider has a very very long neck. If you look at it from the side, it has like a like like I don't know if Pa has like a side view photo of this thing in Oh, he has.

[00:15:24]It has like a very very long neck and it's also called this pelican spider and I I only knew it because of that but not because of the assassin bit. So, this is quite interesting.

[00:15:33]>> The victim and yes, the spider in this situation is a [ __ ] victim feels those vibrations in its web and assumes the fly it DoorDash earlier has arrived, gets up off the couch and goes to grab its food. However, when they reach the front door and this [ __ ] demon from the seventh circle kicks it down, they realize there is no DoorDash. They are the DoorDash.

[00:15:59]>> This looks so wild.

[00:16:00]>> victim can [ __ ] blink, the assassin stabs it through the chest cuz apparently the circle of hell this thing crawled out of is [ __ ] London.

[00:16:13]>> Wait.

[00:16:13]>> And once the victim is >> Should I not go through Birmingham, guys? No, I'm scared.

[00:16:18]>> firmly impaled, it uses >> See, see, there it is. This is it. This This is it. What What Why? This holy fudging gosh, what this is it This is its neck. This is its neck. This is the neck of the spider.

[00:16:36]The This is This is its neck.

[00:16:39]>> that long >> I I'm not in London. I'm in Birmingham.

[00:16:42]>> long ass neck and oversized jaws to lift it off the ground so it can't fight back while it is pumped full of venom.

[00:16:54]Once that happens, the assassin spider just [ __ ] holds the victim there, stone cold staring at it.

[00:17:03]>> Oh, damn. Comically drawn thing becomes real. Yeah.

[00:17:06]>> Yeah, it feels like one of these This thing feels like one of these This thing feels like one of these um Do you know these uh this this this company that takes drawings of children of animals and makes them into plushies?

[00:17:27]>> It uses >> This kind of feels like it or a Dark Souls boss. Boss, one of the two. You can decide.

[00:17:34]>> Stone-cold staring at it as the life slowly fades from its eyes.

[00:17:44]>> Outro song, outro song, this is an outro. Outro song, outro song, this is an outro. Outro song.