What It’s Like Being Single at 36 in China

[00:00:00]Hi, I'm Coobo.

[00:00:03]I'm 36, single and living alone in China, but for my parents, it's something they worry about a lot.

[00:00:22]>> I'm going to bring you something a little different today, gentlemen. and ladies and ladies I always have to remember there are certain amount of women that are watching this channel but I'm always fascinated by other cultures and looking at the similarities of how dating dynamic and the dating market feminism have changed cultures the modernization of the female brain and today we're going to just sort of sit back and be a bit of a voyerist so to speak and just look at what has now become very popular on on Chinese YouTube. And literally, these are just Chinese people making these types of videos on Western YouTube. They're recording their mundane life. They're recording life as it unfolds. And I'm always fascinated to see the similarities. And so hopefully gentlemen, you will find this as interesting as it is for me because you'll soon discover that we're not that much different as far as cultures are concerned even though one is on the other side of the world. Right? So, with that said, hit that like button, sit back, relax, and just just let's let's enter into Koo's life as a single woman at 36 years old because I can assure you it's not much different from a woman living in the West. But a lot of Western women refuse to post things like this because they still have to keep up the facade of being strong and independent.

[00:01:52]So, let's have a watch, shall we?

[00:01:56]This is part of my breakfast.

[00:02:13]It's called Chinese egg tea, but there's no tea leaves in it.

[00:02:38]It's a traditional drink made by pouring boiling water into a bowl of beaten egg.

[00:02:46]It tastes smooth and very comforting.

[00:02:49]Yeah, that's subjective.

[00:02:52]But you know what? I'm going to try it because I'm just thinking about the protein value in a drink, right? But I digress. My fitness side and my nutritional side just kicked in. But this may be something that we should try, gentlemen. An egg with boiling water. Never would have thought of that.

[00:03:10]We're learning as we go, gents. We're learning as we go.

[00:03:23]The sun was shining brightly and the kinkens were very comfortable.

[00:03:28]>> Yes, we got the cats. We got cats, my friend.

[00:03:33]The cat has to be inserted. Single woman and cats. I like hand and gloves.

[00:03:40]Regardless of where you go in the world, My days are actually quite simple.

[00:04:13]I have breakfast, go to the library, edit videos, read some books.

[00:04:29]It's a quiet life.

[00:04:35]And honestly, I've gotten used to it.

[00:04:54]Sometimes I bring my own food.

[00:05:01]This is a chocolate steamed bun.

[00:05:13]>> I made it myself.

[00:05:17]>> Now, after watching a few of these videos, cuz I've watched a few, they all seem to highlight eating. Every single one of them really put a lot of effort into just consuming food. and it's just a major part of their existence, of their everyday existence. I don't know if this is part of the culture or what, but this is you'll if you ever watch any of these videos, you'll see that this is the theme. But what I'm happy to see here is that it's not all about let me find a man to pay for my excitement.

[00:05:48]This woman is quite contented being on her own, quite contented just saving money, being frugal, not trying to suck money from some poor sucker, you know, going on some foodie dates, etc. So, I'm trying to show you the differences between how the cultures actually think.

[00:06:08]She's single and she don't have a job right now. She lost her job. I've seen this in other videos. So, I don't know if in this video you'll see her talk about trying to find a job, but but as far as I'm concerned, that should be a major issue in a lot of her videos.

[00:06:25]But let's proceed.

[00:06:55]And this is the sweet potatoes.

[00:07:11]I got them at the supermarket, obviously.

[00:07:26]>> Now, you notice that a lot of Chinese people are not overweight, and you can understand why. steam sweet potatoes, chocolate buns she made at her own house. She's not interested in attracting male sexual attention. She's she's properly covered and she's not looking for male validation. She's not looking around seeing who's watching.

[00:07:47]She's quite at peace being out in the park doing her own thing. These are the little things that I look for when it comes to actually finding if somebody's could be a viable mate.

[00:08:10]my lunch. Just something simple.

[00:08:17]>> Not fancy, but enough.

[00:08:34]This is Ku Square.

[00:08:42]>> It is the heart of Chandu, serving as the city's central landmark, cultural hub.

[00:08:58]Next to Tanfu Square is the Sichuan Museum.

[00:09:22]After lunch, I came to a nearby park, People's Park.

[00:09:37]>> There's something very special here.

[00:09:57]There is a matchmaking corner.

[00:10:18]people come here to look for partners not for themselves but for their children.

[00:10:27]Here there is no love only lots of conditions.

[00:10:44]In China, people believe that at a certain age you should get married.

[00:11:04]height, age, salary, whether you own a house and a car.

[00:11:09]>> These are all key points that everyone is looking at.

[00:11:13]So, being single in your 30s can feel like a problem.

[00:11:42]Not just for you but also for your parents.

[00:11:46]>> These papers contain very few photographs.

[00:11:51]It seems that marriage is based on suitable conditions rather than love.

[00:12:07]My parents are no exception.

[00:12:11]They started worrying about my marriage when I was around 25.

[00:12:26]Since then, they've introduced me to many people, >> even strangers I've never met. Sometimes not even in the same city.

[00:12:51]Sometimes my mom would tell me how good someone is even though she has never met him.

[00:13:01]Imagine a parent who have invested and raised and spent a lot of money on kids, a child, the one child that they were able to have and their bloodline ends with that one child. Just let that sink in for a bit. You don't think they would be desperate enough to get out there with boards and freaking billboards and signs? Please, please just just find someone. Of course. Of course. You can't blame the parents because obviously it's not working for you. The parents are willing to do anything to actually get something started. Yeah. Even finding someone that they've never even met before. I mean, have we ever met anyone before we meet them for the first time? So, I don't understand why you feel that the parents should actually get you to meet someone that you've never met before that they felt looked good on paper because that's how all dating apps start. Looks good on paper, but you have to put some effort into it, my dear. And the pace at which she seems to be addressing life and relationships seem to be extremely passive, very blas, it's going to happen kind of way is where a lot of people go wrong. And I feel that at her age, 34 I think she said. Yeah, she's a leftover for sure. And whether you like that term or not, that's the reality of the dated market. So she can set her price as high as she wants. The men determines her value. Shout out to the gentleman who quoted me that in the comment section.

[00:14:36]Yeah, I'm going to keep using it because it sums up exactly what's happening in the dating market. So, when I see a 34 year old woman just sort of coasting through life like this in this calm way without no degree of urgency thinking that it's just going to happen.

[00:14:55]I just say to myself, hey, you brought this on yourself. I feel more sorry for the parents to be honest with you.

[00:15:15]And she would say, "Don't be too picky.

[00:15:32]There was even a time she would message me every day about someone new.

[00:15:49]And sometimes I feel like we haven't really talked about anything else for a long time.

[00:16:11]I ordered an Americano online for 5.9 yuan.

[00:16:40]There is a traditional Chinese tea house in People's Park.

[00:17:25]This is a traditional craft called tire in Mandarin.

[00:17:31]>> Simply put, it's cleaning your ears, but it feels very comfortable.

[00:17:40]>> What?

[00:17:42]Somebody cleaning your ears. I hope it's not a physical clean cleansing because it sounds like it's sound that's coming rather than, you know, picking wax out of your ear. I'm because this is in the middle of a restaurant for Christ's sake. H Oh man, different cultures, my friend.

[00:18:03]Hey, but back to the fact that her mother sends her messages on a daily basis about men shows her mother's sense of urgency. The mother understands the situation that her daughter's in and the daughter just have no clue. This is what I see here. The daughter just thinks that's going to happen, but yet there's no effort on her her part. Still can't get over the air cleaning in the restaurant, though. Wow. Okay.

[00:18:50]This is also a popular tourist destination attracting many international visitors.

[00:19:28]A cup of tea costs between 18 and 35 and water is unlimited.

[00:19:47]Back at the library, I will continue editing the video.

[00:20:13]In China, some people even call women over 30s like me, leftover.

[00:20:29]I don't really like that word, but it shows how people think.

[00:20:35]Right back to the same problem. Women are constantly aware that there is a problem. They don't like it. Doesn't matter if you like it or not, lady.

[00:20:45]That's the reality of the society that you live in. Those are the labels that people going to give you because that's what they consider you as. You cannot live in a bubble thinking that everybody should adhere to your rules rather than the general rules of society. So this is the problem that we face with most women around the globe. So even though the delusion might be slightly different on different parts of the globe, the problem is still the same. They're all delusional when it comes to relationships.

[00:21:21]I think it's a difference between generations.

[00:21:28]>> No, it's not the difference between generations. This is biology.

[00:21:32]Unfortunately, biology doesn't give a about generations. Practically, every man wants a younger, fertile woman. Period. unless that man has passed the stage in his life where he no longer interested in having kids and she's now young compared to him. So a 34 year old woman, yeah, she can find a nice 50-year-old man. But as far as him wanting kids at that age, probably not.

[00:21:57]But you don't want that guy. None of these women wants a divorced guy, a guy who's who has gray hairs, who's older.

[00:22:06]They want a guy her age. And usually that man doesn't want a woman his same age. And just women just have a hard time identifying with one simple equation.

[00:22:17]For them, life has a timeline.

[00:22:22]But for me, I see life a little differently.

[00:22:38]This is today's dinner.

[00:22:47]Okay. She's just going to cook more food. More food. More food. There's no commentary there. I don't want to watch her cooking.

[00:23:15]This dish is called cold rice noodles.

[00:23:21]I'm not against marriage.

[00:23:25]I still believe in it, but I also believe it should happen at the right time with the right person.

[00:23:32]Until then, I'm okay being on my own.

[00:23:42]>> This is my life right now and I'm still figuring it out.

[00:23:47]>> And that right time should have been when you were in your 20s, my dear.

[00:23:51]That's what you're failing to recognize.

[00:23:55]The right time doesn't only occur for you. It has to be the right time for the man as well. This is what a lot of women fail to understand. They're only thinking about their right time. What you don't realize is that you need somebody else who sees the world exactly like you. And usually that's not the case with most men. Good luck. I hope you eventually find a gentleman who's on the same page and hopefully by then it has not been too late where you have just become so accustomed to being alone because you seem quite comfortable right now being alone. You have not said anything about being lonely. You have not said anything about you know being alone and struggling. I don't know if you have that in all the videos but it see you you seem rather comfortable. So when that occurs, you will have a harder time adapting to someone else who comes into your life or entering into another man's life. So these are the problems that women face around the world. So my friends, this session was supposed to be a relaxed, calm insight into a single woman's life on the other side of the world. Let me know your thoughts. By all means, chime in in the comments section.

[00:25:08]I hope you enjoyed it. You can go over to her page. I will link this video at the end and uh if you guys want to go over to China and find more women like her because there's quite a few videos out there like this. Once I clicked on one, the algorithm just started showing me more and more and more and more.

[00:25:26]There's a lot with single men doing this, but um I thought you'd find it more interesting with a single woman.

[00:25:32]Okay, so my friends, hit that like button on the way out. Subs. Remember to go over to her page and say hello. Tell her that I recommended you. Okay, remember, pick up one of my books over on Amazon, The Modern Man's Blueprint or The Modern Woman's Blueprint, now available in audio as well. The links are in the description of this video.

[00:25:54]So, my friends, until tomorrow, remember, >> whenever in doubt, ask an older man.

[00:26:08]>> Ask an older man. That's right. I'll see you soon. Cheers.