Dokibird Being ABSOLUTELY Unhinged

[00:00:00]Sportsbra, uh, get out of here, don't give her Wait, actually no. Can you just drink human milk? [music] No, I'm India, I can say it. I have mind break, guys.

[00:00:08]>> [laughter] >> Wait, do you want to like squirt each other's milk?

[00:00:12]EVERY ANGLE POSSIBLE.

[00:00:14]>> [laughter] >> WAIT, THAT WAS SO BAD.

[00:00:17]FINALLY, I have [music] this.

[00:00:22]>> [laughter] >> I have the Wait, I can't say No, I'm India, [music] I can say it. I have mind break, guys.

[00:00:32]>> [laughter] >> I was like, wait, am I allowed to say Yeah, I I can.

[00:00:36]>> [music] >> Yeah, soulless eyes. Sorry, I meant soul That's what I meant. Soulless Sorry, PG, soulless eyes. Soulless >> [laughter] >> That's exactly what I intentionally [music] meant, guys. All right, I'll do it three more requests, chat. Three more requests, guys.

[00:00:50]>> [laughter] >> No. No. You're not getting that. You're not [laughter and gasps] You're not I'm not doing that for $2.

[00:00:58]What the [ __ ] >> [laughter] >> Uh, would you do it for a hundred? Okay, yeah, I would actually.

[00:01:08]NO!

[00:01:08]>> [screaming] >> OH MY GOD!

[00:01:11]WAIT, THAT WAS SO BAD.

[00:01:13]LIKE OVERLOOKING A LOT MORE. YEAH, that was really pretty.

[00:01:19]>> [laughter] >> Okay.

[00:01:21]I understand now.

[00:01:23]>> [laughter] >> I get why people want me in the dorm [clears throat] now.

[00:01:27]Okay, guys, this is for science, really.

[00:01:30]I Okay, I was just curious if it was a different pose or anything.

[00:01:36]Move the cap. You don't understand, Doki. You got to move the cap Okay, how do I move the camera?

[00:01:44]Okay, I now understand.

[00:01:46]>> [laughter] >> Wait, she's wearing pants though, right?

[00:01:50]Okay, she's wearing pants. Okay, that's good.

[00:01:53]Okay.

[00:01:53]>> [laughter] >> I'm I got to go to the corner. I don't feel so good. I need to go to corner.

[00:01:59][laughter] I just have to be sure.

[00:02:09]Sorry.

[00:02:12]>> [laughter] >> My own personal show. Let's go. I got my own lap dance. Caught in 4K. I am naughty but trying to hide it.

[00:02:28]>> [laughter] >> Turn your ass closer to me. Tilt that ass.

[00:02:32]Yeah, yeah, that's right. Tilt it. Tilt Yeah, yeah, there you go. Yeah. OH.

[00:02:40]>> [laughter] >> TINY VENOM, COME OVER HERE.

[00:02:45]>> [laughter] >> NOW I NEED A VENOM IN A MIDDLE.

[00:02:51]YES. [laughter] GET HERE. YES. YES. UNLIMITED VENOMS.

[00:02:58]>> [laughter] >> OH MY GOD, THERE'S MORE. There's more.

[00:03:00]It doesn't stop. Oh my god, it doesn't stop. Every angle possible.

[00:03:06]>> [laughter] >> AND OH MY GOD, look at the Hela. She's just stuck between all the [ __ ] Venoms. She ain't complaining. This is my Venom harem.

[00:03:18]Oh, no.

[00:03:23]She was in the way.

[00:03:25]Yeah, I was THINKING A SHORTCUT.

[00:03:27]I WAS THINKING A SHORTCUT, GUYS.

[00:03:30]>> [laughter] >> IT WAS AN ACCIDENT. WHY WOULD YOU JUST stand there in the middle?

[00:03:36]Like what's wrong with her?

[00:03:39]>> [laughter] >> Yeah, I would. All right, calling HKPD.

[00:03:43]I broke into the street racing scene. I broke more than one thing.

[00:03:47]>> [laughter] >> Let's just listen to Mozart.

[00:03:52]Venom, Venom.

[00:04:03]>> [laughter] >> Okay, so this one freak.

[00:04:10]>> [laughter] >> UM JESUS, WHOA JESUS.

[00:04:17]>> [laughter] >> OH, somebody's going to hell and it ain't me.

[00:04:22]Calm down, Jesus.

[00:04:24]>> [laughter] >> Jesus just needs a little assistance.

[00:04:27]One second coming of Jesus.

[00:04:31]>> [laughter] >> Oh my god.

[00:04:32]Am I going to hell if I say like isn't Jesus, you know, A VIRGIN? LIKE WELL, TECHNICALLY you were all here for this, so we're all going to hell unless we all repent. You watched this stream, so you are part of the problem. Yeah.

[00:04:49]>> [laughter] >> Oh, there's a Squirtle. Squirtle, water water. Are you okay?

[00:04:57]What's with this place? Where's the water? If only there were another healthy Squirtle around to help me.

[00:05:05]Would you [music] want to like squirt EACH OTHER'S MOUTH?

[00:05:07]>> [laughter] >> IF YOU THINK ABOUT IT, WHEN THEY'RE USING WATER GUN, technically they're spitting in your mouth. You use transport >> [laughter] >> Okay, don't worry, I've got you.

[00:05:21]Where does the water come from? If you think about it, I'm going to >> [laughter] >> Should have been me not broken by the super chat thing.

[00:05:33]Thank you.

[00:05:35]Sorry, if I'm going to talk about it, I'll talk about it with this. All right, so >> [laughter] >> the concert the concert was $48,000.

[00:05:49]>> [laughter] >> Jingle jangle.

[00:05:55]Jingle jingle.

[00:05:57]The funny thing is that I don't know what chat is reacting to. It could be for the money or it could be >> [laughter] >> for the jingle jangle.

[00:06:06]I told you, sports bra off. That's right. My sports bra was working overtime.

[00:06:13]>> [laughter] >> That's a big number. Nice.

[00:06:18]What if I get demolarized? I know that had to happen before.

[00:06:20]>> It's coming with us.

[00:06:22]>> Really?

[00:06:24]Oh my god, there's him. There's Reuben.

[00:06:27]Can't wait to fall in love with this character and nothing bad is going to happen to Reuben. Hey Reuben, what are you doing there, little guy?

[00:06:35]>> Reuben, find any clues?

[00:06:38]>> Sniff out. Sniff them out for me.

[00:06:41]Reuben.

[00:06:42]What?

[00:06:43]>> No wonder you die.

[00:06:44]>> Reuben, >> at the order of the >> only joking. He's going to live for a very long time, guys.

[00:06:50]>> Reuben, I need your help.

[00:06:51]>> Reuben, bring pickaxe. Who's daddy?

[00:06:55]>> That's it.

[00:06:56]>> That's right. That's right.

[00:06:57]>> Come on, Reuben. I told you.

[00:06:58]>> Shoot me.

[00:06:59]Don't Shoot me.

[00:07:01]>> [laughter] >> Reuben, YES, THAT'S RIGHT.

[00:07:05]>> CATCH YOU.

[00:07:09]REUBEN, NO.

[00:07:12]>> [screaming] >> OKAY. OKAY. [laughter] OKAY, I'll catch him.

[00:07:16]>> [snorts] [laughter] >> Oh my god.

[00:07:21]Reuben, I caught YOU. REUBEN, REUBEN.

[00:07:23]>> NO.

[00:07:33]>> [snorts] [laughter] [laughter] >> OH, HE DIDN'T LIKE THAT. OH, did I do it?

[00:07:45]>> Don't worry, everybody likes a belly rub. If I can't get up your belly. OH MY GOD, HOW THE [ __ ] UP?

[00:07:53]>> [screaming] >> BRO, OKAY, I'M GOING TO STAB HIM.

[00:07:58]>> [laughter] >> DON'T WORRY, I AM ALSO a licensed veterinarian. There's too many lizards out there. We need to make sure we fix the lizard population.

[00:08:07]>> [laughter] >> WHAT THE [ __ ] IS THAT?

[00:08:11]WAIT, DID I STAB EVERYTHING?

[00:08:14]OH, IT'S CUZ I DIDN'T HAVE MY SWORD OUT.

[00:08:17]>> [laughter] >> STAB.

[00:08:19]DID IT WORK?

[00:08:21]I FORGOT.

[00:08:22]I WAS LIKE, WHERE THE [ __ ] IS YOUR DICK?

[00:08:25]>> [laughter] >> I THOUGHT I WAS REALLY GOOD AT MY JOB. I THOUGHT I was really good at like neutering.

[00:08:31]Oh, wait. Okay, we got stab the heart now so he can stop falling in love with all these lizards.

[00:08:38]It's good for you. Oh my god, it's back TO THE [ __ ] >> [laughter] >> WHAT?

[00:08:44]BRO, ALL RIGHT.

[00:08:47]SPOOK. OH, ONE MORE HIT. Don't worry, you don't need kids. You can't afford all the [ __ ] child services. Not child services, I mean the What was it?

[00:08:58]Child support. Yeah, child support.

[00:09:02]>> [laughter] >> This is what it always was like. I'm just not wearing a sports bra right now.

[00:09:08]I'm freeing the goods. Y'all let them breathe sometime, you know? You know I found out for the men out there, for those who don't know, apparently, actually, I don't know, I might be spreading misinformation, but you have to have a balance between wearing your bras because if you wear your bras too much, [music] you're destroying the elasticity of your of your boobs. But then if you don't wear your bras enough, then gravity does its work.

[00:09:32]>> [laughter] >> I don't know, so you have to have a good like balance between like bra or no bra.

[00:09:38]They need support. Yes, but you SUPPORT IT TOO MUCH. It's like if you use your training wheels too much, you're going to rely on it the entire time. It works for the balls down there, too.

[00:09:48]>> [laughter] >> For the men out there, you can't escape gravity as well. You see, the difference is that we have bras.

[00:09:57]>> [laughter] >> No, for doki doki. Wait, actually don't don't don't pick >> [laughter] >> Scratch that. Sorry, I was thinking about A RABBIT.

[00:10:06]>> [laughter] >> THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEAN. OUT OF CONTEXT.

[00:10:09]DO NOT DO THAT. Do not do >> [laughter] >> Wait, do I look presentable enough?

[00:10:15]Quickly, she snags a mirror from her hand back to inspect herself before he enters the room. Oh my god, what? What do >> [laughter] >> Okay, okay. Um I think she might need to get it get it checked out. I think she might need to see a What were they called? Those doctors for >> [laughter] >> No.

[00:10:43]Oh.

[00:10:46]>> [laughter] >> Oh, no. No. No. Yeah, she might need to see a gynecologist. I mean, isn't it exciting when it talks back?

[00:10:55]>> [laughter] >> I knew it. I knew it was DDR.

[00:10:59]What's that sound? Do you hear that?

[00:11:04]What the I lock in, guys.

[00:11:08]WHAT THE [ __ ] WHO ADDS NUMBERS?

[00:11:13]OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD.

[00:11:16]I CAN'T EVEN LOOK at the dance cuz I'm trying I'm TRYING TO LOCK OH MY I don't have F12. That's Okay. OH MY GOD. WHAT?

[00:11:28]>> [laughter] >> WOAH.

[00:11:35]>> IS WHERE YOU ARE. I heard that you might depart tomorrow, so I came to say hello.

[00:11:40]Might you have time to talk?

[00:11:42]>> Oh, woah. Woah. I always have time for you, Guan Yu.

[00:11:47]>> [laughter] >> It's time. We've unlocked a new route.

[00:11:50]>> From the moment we first met, I felt your heart.

[00:11:53]>> My heart.

[00:11:55]>> There is something about you that makes me think this way.

[00:11:58]>> I see you guys feel the tension between me and Guan Yu right now. He's so mediocre, I'm not going to lie. I'm sorry. He's such a mediocre leader. But, I guess you just got to convince me, Guan Yu.

[00:12:09]>> [laughter] >> Now, I've said my peace. Yet, I find myself wanting to talk to >> But, which one's more rowdy? Which one would Guan Yu like more?

[00:12:20]>> Hm.

[00:12:21]You feel the same way?

[00:12:23]>> [laughter] >> Let us find somewhere to sit and relax.

[00:12:28]>> Okay.

[00:12:29]>> Tonight, I wish to etch the features of your face and the sound of your voice >> [screaming] >> into my memory.

[00:12:41]>> [screaming] >> He just got IT LIKE THAT?

[00:12:47]WHAT JUST HAPPENED?

[00:12:49]OH MY GOD, WHAT JUST HAPPENED?

[00:12:51]>> [screaming] >> HE WANTED TO ETCH my face and my voice, so he could remember it BEFORE I LEFT.

[00:13:03]WHAT?

[00:13:04]OH MY GOD, WHAT the [ __ ] just happened?

[00:13:08]I'm just [ __ ] around, but like the official dialogue and the official cutscenes are so much worse than anything I can say. And like it [ __ ] catches me off guard every time.

[00:13:23]>> [laughter] >> I was joking, and then it just got so much worse.

[00:13:29]>> [laughter] >> No, I think cats are just somewhat lactose intolerant.

[00:13:33]>> Wait, they're lactose intolerant? Then why do they drink their mom's milk?

[00:13:40]They're lactose intolerant.

[00:13:41]>> Yeah, I was going to say, if you're lactose intolerant, are you able to drink breast milk? Or is that a different type of milk? Are we just not able to digest cow's milk because it's like a different species?

[00:13:51]>> I don't know.

[00:13:53]>> So, like, as long as it's a human milk, it's okay?

[00:13:55]>> If you're a baby, you're probably exploding [ __ ] anyway, so it's kind of >> [music] >> How would you tell?

[00:14:01]>> Oh, that's true. You can just give your baby milk and it doesn't matter cuz they're always [ __ ] anyway. Oh, wait.

[00:14:08]You're saying you can [laughter] develop lactose intolerant as a mutation? Like, if you become lactose intolerant and you're older and you really want milk, can you just drink human milk?

[00:14:19]Or is that frowned upon in society?

[00:14:22]>> [laughter] >> We're encroaching on a different >> STOP THE CONVERSATION.

[00:14:27]>> [laughter] >> WE CAN'T. WE'VE ALREADY HIT OUR fetish quota today.

[00:14:31]>> It's not a fetish.

[00:14:32]>> YES, IT IS.

[00:14:34]>> IT'S A QUESTION. IF YOU REALLY MISS milk and it's like, you know, it's your favorite type of drink. And so, like, >> Then you have lactaid. You Or you drink >> What you drink What do you mean you have lactaid? You drink your own >> [laughter] >> What? Wait, WHAT DO YOU THINK LACTAID >> WHAT DO YOU said lactaid? I was like, what did the What DO YOU MEAN?

[00:14:55]>> LACTAID.

[00:14:56]AID. AID.

[00:14:57]>> I was like, damn it, that's freaky.

[00:15:00]>> [laughter] >> I was like, you're on your own with that one. I'm not touching that. I >> [laughter] >> I think if someone were to do that, they'd have much other issues.

[00:15:11]>> Yeah, I was just going to say.

[00:15:12]>> It's [laughter] like drinking urine where like >> No. No.

[00:15:16]Is that bad for you because >> [laughter]